Per 
Seeking Greenlights: Yes
Page Type: Joke SCP
Page Layout: containment procedures, description, tests, interview
Elevator Pitch: A bored god that created SCPs to mess with humans
Item #: SCP-001-j
Object Class: Apollyon
Special Containment Procedures: Containment is impossible no shit Sherlock he's literally God
Description: SCP-001-j is the origin of all anomalous objects, events, and behavior. It appears as a man dressed in a black suit with long brown hair and a beard just imagine Jesus in a suit that's pretty much what he is. SCP-001-j is an extremely powerful reality bender and can even create/destroy anomalies as well as universes, realities, pretty much anything and is theorized to be God. SCP-001-j was found in a bar ██████. The foundation arrived on the scene after reports of nearby bodies of water turning into ████ including taps and bottled water and the locals partying after drinking it. I swear, best fucking ████ I've ever had. Everyone was so drunk. It was awesome. After an incident where 6 dispatched MTF teams were put out of commission a foundation crew came in to bargain with SCP-001-j. SCP-001-j submitted to the crew because apparently the MTF teams that were sent in were now his 'homies'. you're my homie too 001During the trip back to Site-██ the crew had apparently binged the show ██████ watching from the 'huge ass plasma TV he teleported in'. SCP-001-j is currently in Site-██ although he is not contained and says he chooses to stay there 'to chill with his bros'.
SCP-001-j Test
SCP-001-j is asked to demonstrate his abilities. SCP-001-j responds by making a coffee mug turn into disco ball that made anyone who looked at it dance until they literally dead (nobody actually died as he reverted the effects). SCP-001-j is asked to further demonstrate his abilities. He transports SCP-██ out of it's containment cell and then starts playing Mario Kart with it. He only lost because of that blue shell. Load of bullshit. When asked how far his powers go he turns all of existence into a reality TV show titled 'Hell'. Everyone in the site during testing appeared in front of a TV screen where they watched the entire thing. Season 5 was a fucking banger. Really loved the nuclear war arc All testing on SCP-001-j is strictly forbidden and requires the permission of all members of the 05 council.
Interview on SCP-001-j
Interviewer: Dr. Cross
Foreword: SCP-001-j agrees to an interview. Dr. Cross is chosen to interview him.
< Begin Log, ██/██/███ 7:32 PM >
Dr. Cross: So tests suggest an immense ability to bend reality including the creation and destruction of SCPs. Do you know how you gained these abilities?
SCP-001-j: I'm God.
Dr. Cross:Er, ok. Are you perhaps the origin of SCPs?
SCP-001-j:Oh yea, why?
Dr. Cross:So why did you create anomalies?
SCP-001-j:I was like sitting around one day and I was really bored so I was like, 'Yo I made these human people right? And they believe in like physics and shit. So wouldn't it be like funny if I just went like fuck you and made things not make sense.
Dr. Cross:You do understand that you have created highly dangerous entities that kill people
SCP-001-j:Yep
Dr. Cross:From what I'm aware of you are quite fond of some of us. These anomalies will pose a threat to them.
SCP-001-j:Lmao I'll just make them immortal or something
Dr. Cross:These anomalies also cause destruction and pain. Don't you think that's immoral?
SCP-001-j:A member of the SCP Foundation is trying to guilt trip me for being immoral. I really do consider wiping all you bastards out from time to time.
Interview is quickly ended after this statement. All members of the foundation are to be cautious while speaking with SCP-001-j to refrain from angering him which could potentially end the world.
< End Log, ██/██/███ 7:49 PM >
Closing Statement: SCP-001-j still resides in Site-██. He has since then altered sub level ██ to a giant ████. What a legend. Job's been a lot more fun since thenHe has also altered the behavior of many anomalies on that level. This includes hostile entities such as SCP-██ who was seen wearing a party hat and chugging a gallon of gatorade while foundation staff cheered him on. now that was epic. SCPs are to be kept at least 100 miles away from SCP-001-j unless granted permission from at least to members of the 05 council.
