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Item #: SCP-XXXX
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures: [SCP-XXX is to be kept in a standard precious item locker at Site 17. Before conducting experiments researchers must submit planned tests to the researcher currently supervising SCP-XXX one week in advance. Before testing of SCP-XXX can be approved researchers are required to read incident-XXX to understand the largely uncontrollable aspects of SCP-XXX. Any deviations from planned items to be used or the amount of currency used will lead to the experiment being terminated and disciplinary measures being taken. Upon completion of tests all items produced must be either disposed of appropriately or kept for further testing, no items produced may be taken for personal use in order to prevent abuse of the anomalous features of SCP-XXX.]
Description: [SCP-XXX is a 50cm by 50cm box made of sapele wood in a well worn condition. One side of the box houses a door and door knob with a 'key' hole in its centre. Upon this door a plaque is mounted reading 'EQUIVALENT EXCHANGE, SATISFACTION GUARANTEED! All acts of damage or theft enacted by the E.E are in no manner linked to E.E.E and are instead enacted at the liability of operator as specified in the terms and conditions’
SCP-XXX can be opened by inserting any denomination or nationality of currency, regardless of year of printing, into the 'key’ hole. When an item is placed inside and the door firmly closed SCP-XXX disappears and then reappears after no longer than 6 seconds with an item inside equivalent to the perceived value of the operator of both the item and currency used. All forms of currency used are affected by fluctuations in the value of the currency itself however, this appears to be based off of the operators knowledge of the current value of currency used. Electronic forms of payment such as credit cards are not accepted. However, when cheques are used an equivalent amount of credit is removed from the operator’s assets; this begins with financial assets and extends to anything that the operator honestly views as belonging to them (see Incident Report XXX-01). When currency is pushed into the key hole it is invariably able to fit regardless of dimensions. This currency is not stored in the box and all attempts to locate currency after door is opened remain inconclusive. It is thought that all currency and items used are somehow transferred to the group known as Equivalent Exchange Enterprises/E.E.E (see Incident Report XXX-01). SCP-XXX was discovered at a car boot sale by Foundation agents in Bath, England, after Type Blue Agent ██████ had an impression that the box 'wanted to be used'. Current owner did not seem to have any awareness of anomalous aspects of the item as they sold it for the Agent's tie clip and a packet of cigarettes. At this point SCP-XXX is not considered sentient.]
Addendum: [At this point Foundation personnel have been unable to locate E.E.E or any of its affiliates. Concern has been expressed over the model number of SCP-XXX as researchers hypothesise that this suggests there are a minimum of 222 other models in existence if not more. Due to the useful applications of the anomalous effects of SCP-XXX it is more than likely that these models are in use and their retrieval should be a high level priority.]
(Im really confused as to how to correctly add an incident report, please do let me know. Until I do I have just added the incident report below so the whole article can make sense)
Incident Report
SCP involved: SCO-XXX
Personal involved: Dr █████
Date XX/XX/XX
Location: Site 17
Description: During testing of the extent of SCP-XXX’s ability to attain financial assets when presented with Cheques or other forms of ‘IOUs’ Dr █████ submitted a blank cheque by accident into the ‘keyhole’ slot alongside a blank piece of A4 paper inside the box. Upon closing of the door SCP-XXX did not operate for 20 seconds. Dr █████ attempted to leave the testing environment in a state of apparent confusion but disappeared alongside SCP-XXX. When SCP-XXX eventually reappeared after 23 minutes the door was ajar with the original signed blank cheque (with a line though the box stating amount of currency) and a voucher for all assets in the possession of the late Dr █████ and for ‘Assorted body parts of one (1) human male, thirty six (36) years of age, in a healthy condition and one (1) typical developing human, 5 months, left on site for further development. Further details to be found overleaf’ inside. with a detailed list of Dr █████'s personal medical records pertaining to all his organs and general physical condition attached. A handwritten note was stapled to the voucher featuring elegant writing stating:
To whom it may concern,
Due to an apparent accounting error the previous operator of Equivalent Exchange model #223 neglected to specify the amount of ‘value’ to be used. In order to avoid wrongful practice as per terms and conditions Equivalent Exchange Enterprises (E.E.E) have returned all items offered in the form of a voucher redeemable at any of our central offices or stores. Unfortunately some items offered have been irreparably disassembled in transit before the accounting error was realised; however, as per the disclaimer attached to your product EEE takes no responsibility for damage to goods caused by exchanges enacted by the operator.
Kind regards, E.E.E Accounting on behalf of E.E.E Bailiff Services.
P.S: Please do remember all vouchers are only redeemable one (1) month after issue; subsequent to this all goods will be seized by E.E.E
Addendum: [Attempts to locate any E.E.E stores or offices were unsuccessful. One month after the test all of Dr █████'s assets disappeared alongside the original blank cheque leading to Dr █████'s partner suffering from a fractured ankle after falling from where their porch used to be situated to the ground as well as a miscarriage of their 6 month pregnancy.]
