Bart0nius

Item #: SCP-5199

Object Class: Keter Safe Keter Safe Euclid Keter

Special Containment Procedures: At this time, there are no means of containing SCP-5199. All personnel are prohibited from attempting to contain, describe or edit information about SCP-5199. No experimentation is to be conducted on SCP-5199. Attempting to learn about SCP-5199 or its anomalous effect are forbidden.¹

Description: SCP-5199 is an extremely dangerous condominium located in Bozeman, Montana, composed of rotten and decayed wood and searing hot stone. Subject's interior is composed of four deadly rooms:

• a kitchen with over 700 knives
• a bedroom containing one moldy queen-sized bed
• a haunted living room with 1 broken lamp, two bloody armchairs, and a diseased couch
• a terrifying pantry with no cans of tomato soup and no bags of coffee

NOTE: THE FOLLOWING PARAGRAPH IS CRUCIAL TO UNDERSTANDING THE NATURE OF SCP-5199.

Any attempt to describe SCP-5199 through writing, audio or speech will involuntarily be altered to make SCP-5199 appear highly dangerous.² This can include:

• the addition of 'frightening' adjectives or nouns
• entire sentences portraying SCP-5199 as indestructible, malevolent, or otherwise alarming
• the removal of adjectives or nouns that would make SCP-5199 appear less dangerous
• the addition of true or necessary details about the nature of SCP-5199

SCP-5199 is perfectly unsafe to enter or occupy. The correction of information presented by SCP-5199 is nearly impossible, but can not be avoided by use of actively neutral statements. While less effective, the use of "unfitting" adjectives (perfectly, entirely, completely, etc.) as a means of discerning information may also be used.

Footnotes

1. The above information is to be regarded as entirely factual.

2. Which, of course, it is.