Per 
CAPTION-GOES-HERE
Item #: SCP-5313
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5313 must not be contained, especially not in a standard 10-meter by 10-meter humanoid containment cell. Every month (or, whichever interval the on-site director implements between the maintenances/checks of standard humanoid containment cells), the on-site director is to put into effect procedure Liberation-5313 which is as follows:
Exactly 10 D-class personnel are to be sent through psychological manipulation program Ex-█, with the specific intent of fostering resentment against the foundation and stressing the importance of freeing SCP-5313. The team of D-class is to be equipped with all resources necessary to breach the site security, and only enough intelligence so as to enable them to free SCP-5313 from containment, or at the very least damage its containment cell. Limiting the D-class personnel's knowledge of the facility to focus them on freeing SCP-5313 will maximize the chance of this procedure's success. Finally, the D-class are to be directed to free SCP-5313 from containment or damage the containment cell. No attempt to prevent their attempt will be tolerated.
As a contingency, the foundation must, at all costs, inform other interest groups of the importance and danger of SCP-5313, so they might also attempt to free it from containment.
Description: SCP-5313 is a humanoid entity with the appearance of an average caucasian female. Due to the entity's nature, no height or weight measurements have been successfully or reliably obtained. As for the entity's anomalous effect: any action intended or attempted in relation to SCP-5313 will inevitably fail (See Addendum 24, point 6, for clarification). Whether this is by some fundamental probabilistic manipulation by the entity (or through the control of the thoughts of any parties involved) is unknown.
Addendum 24: Researcher Note by Dr. Joseph Tallen
Warning, the following addendum is classified. Only personnel with a score of 100 on an agency logic examination and psychological fortitude test may proceed. Restricted access is enforced via memetic kill agent.
If you were to answer this question at random, what is the probability that you would be correct?
A: 25%
B: 0%
C: 25%
D: 50%
Now that we have such pleasantries out of the way, we can get to business. The containment and description of SCP-5313 are difficult tasks that are only to be undertaken by the particularly clever. It is unknown how directly related to SCP-5313 an action (or intended action) must be in order to incur its anomalous effect, and as such, any information regarding SCP-5313 is provisional and to be regarded skeptically. The above description of SCP-5313 was written by ██████ ██████, a Junior researcher at site ██, with the intention of submitting a sub-par and misleading report to Dr. ████ out of spite. So, considering the description, we believe ██████ ██████ to have failed, and the report to be perfectly satisfactory and accurate. The containment procedures, though highly unorthodox, function by a fortunate fold of logic. While writing the procedure, Dr. ████ had the intention of containing SCP-5313, and failed miraculously, resulting in a containment procedure that is focused on SETTING THE ENTITY FREE. Luckily, any attempt to free SCP-5313 will fail, and in fact, secure its containment.
Since taking over, I have narrowed down some specifics regarding SCP-5313's effects, which are reserved for this restricted addendum to maintain an abstract and unproblematic description of SCP-5313 in the general file.
1. The effects of SCP-5313 seem to be unaffected by distance from the entity.
2. The effects of SCP-5313 seem to be contingent on the intent of a conscious (but not necessarily sapient) observer.
3. Reality anchors do not stop the anomalous effects of SCP-5313.
4. If SCP-5313 exerts some effect on the fundamental nature of probability, then it must interfere with the collapse of a system's wave function. Experimental attempts to confirm this hypothesis have failed, and experimental attempts to reject this hypothesis have failed. However, when we were certain that we had found a researcher who could conduct an experiment with the intent of "finding the truth", we consistently received results that rejected the hypothesis. So, assuming they failed, we suspect this hypothesis to be completely true, though we are awaiting a site █ Logician to assess the validity of our results.
5. If SCP-5313 exerts some effect on the mental faculties of those concerning it, we should expect to find evidence of perception alteration. We have not found much reliable evidence of mind control (or the like), and it is also important to consider that such an effect could result from the mechanisms described in point 4.
6. Individuals with formidable enough logical ability and the mental fortitude to wilfully control their intentions are at much less risk of encountering the anomalous effects of SCP-5313. Entertain this scenario: A regular D-class who intends to walk towards SCP-5313 will either walk away from it or stand still… unless they are able to convince themselves that they are taking steps FORWARD in an attempt to move AWAY from SCP-5313. Naturally, someone familiar with SCP-5313's effects would know that intending to get away from SCP-5313 is the only way to approach it, and they would fail in their intentions anyways. SCP-5313 is an enormous logical mess. Hence, the restriction on this note.
