Cuteness On Main!

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Image Sources: Chupacabra, Creepy Puppet Thing, and Cali

Big thanks to our critters and beta readers:


rating: 0+x

🗿 sayfensound 05/04/18 (Wed) 07:16:22 #52761509


Megathread for wholesome and the cute paranormal stuffs!

Found something utterly unnatural— yet still adorable? Post about it here!

chupa-troopa 05/04/18 (Wed) 07:19:22 #52762341


chupacabra.jpg

chupacabra.jpg


I saw this Chupacabra once, looked like a mashup between a small dog and a bat. It may have been eating one of our farm goats alive, but damn if it didn't look cute while doing so.

kirkjack 05/04/18 (Wed) 07:20:38 #52762724


That's literally an oppossum.

chupa-troopa 05/04/18 (Wed) 07:22:52 #52763065


Oh.

Well, it's a cute opposum.

Plus it was still eating one of our goats, so that's creepy.

rigby1984 05/04/18 (Wed) 07:37:44 #52768535


puppet

help.jpg

Look at this adorable little guy!

My cat went missing and his blood was on its hands.

sepia 05/04/18 (Wed) 07:43:26 #5277092


A few months ago, my friends took me over to a nearby lake. You had to go through a forest to find it, but it was absolutely beautiful. No litter, no judging eyes on your back, you could just swim or chill with no worries.

This night, however, we noticed a small fish tank was partly buried in the sand. In it, a something was glowing— and after closer inspection, it was a squid!

The first thing one of my friends did was stir their finger in the water and lick it (despite us telling him it probably was unsanitary). Turns out they were in a freshwater tank, which was surprising because cephalopods live in exclusively saltwater.

We talked a bit and agreed on two things: that its name was going to be Cali, and that I was going to be taking care of it so I could reach out to some of my pals upstate who work at an aquarium. For all we knew, Cali was a newly discovered species!

After taking a quick picture of them, we lifted the tank out of the sand, and I noticed a scrap of paper in the pit left behind. The writing on it looked like chicken-scratches, but one of my teacher friends who has to read the handwriting of first graders for a living told me it said 'BEWARE.'

Creepy, but I shrugged it off and took Cali home anyways. Together me and my friends managed to lift the tank into my apartment's bedroom so I'd be able to watch it at nighttime.

Once they left, I walked into my bedroom to feel the unmistakable sensation of socked feet hitting a puddle of water. Cali's tank was quickly leaking!

Acting fast, I ran to the bathtub and started filling it up. When it was about half way full, I grabbed Cali out of the tank and quickly ran to the bathroom, plopping them into the tub. They felt like a squishy basketball with a lot more slime. They enjoyed themselves in that tub a lot! Must feel good to get out of a cramped container after… well, however long Cali was in there.

One friend came over a little later and donated a couple of her little bro's bath toys for Cali — a couple foam rings and a little toy tugboat was all she could get though. Cali was all fine and dandy with them until I put in that tugboat. They darted towards it as soon as it hit the water and just sat under it for the longest time. I didn't know if I did something wrong — if it didn't like the yellow color of the toy or something — I was concerned to say the least.

squid.jpg

cali.jpg

Then, all the sudden, it popped its tentacles out of the water! One by one, they came out and wrapped around that little ship. I was just starting to chuckle when the showerhead suddenly turned on and soaked me and my poor reaction times. Then I heard the unmistakable pitter-patter of rain — then the bang of thunder. We were in a pretty substantial drought around then so this was out of the norm.

Cali had sunk that toy boat by the time I got back from getting a towel— showerhead was off too. They swam away from the boat— resuming their playtime with the other toys like before— and I barely even noticed the sound of the rain fading. That's when I finally pieced together was Cali actually was.

A baby Kraken, and an adorable one at that!

I grabbed my phone to inform my friends of this exciting news, but then I realized it was 1 AM. After checking to make sure Cali was comfy in their tub, I lurched over to my bed and passed out before my head hit the pillow.

When I woke up, I walked into the bathroom to see that Cali was gone! A track of slime trailed from the bathtub up the wall to a broken window. They'd escaped.

While at first this was quite saddening— I'd lost a new friend— I realized that they're likely out there right now, sinking real boats as I type this! Plus, I still have a picture to remember them by.

Godspeed, Cali!

amkitty 05/04/18 (Wed) 07:45:48 #5278846


oh oh oh! ive been waiting for a thread like this!

well… one time, i was outside in the forest next to my house, and i saw a big skinny WENDIGO!

i hid behind a tree and watched it for a little, it looked like it was waiting for something… just when i was about to leave, something else crawled out of the woods:

a furry BIGFOOT! they looked into each others eyes, and i thought they were going to attack each other, but instead, they hugged.

"oh my wendigo, has your hunt gone well?"

"yes bigfoot, i have dinner waiting for you…"

Their voices were angelic, and i continued watching in awe.

"well please, treat me then."

the wendigo smiled and began to make out with bigfoot, passing a rabbit from their mouth to his as if it were a bubble gum kiss.

"good wendigo, now i may have to give you a treat…"

bigfoot pulled wendigo close, slowly tracing its exposed ribs with a soft finger.

"oh bigfoot, you wouldnt!" it blushed.

"but i want you…"

i wish i couldve stayed longer but i got a text from my mom that i had a dentist appointment so instead i left a camera there to monitor them.

the footage was so wonderful when i came back later that night 😳😳😳. if you guys want, maybe i could share it with you…

[USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST]

scalyscooter 05/04/18 (Wed) 07:46:24 #5279447



> go into forest
> see two cryptids fucking
> record them and watch the video as porn instead of exposing their existence to the world

ok furry

bismarch 05/04/18 (Wed) 07:48:47 #5279852


This actually reminds me of an experience I had while camping a few years ago. I was out on this hiking trail in the middle of the woods, and I set up my tent.

While I was drifting off to sleep, I heard a deep, pleasant growl outside, like that of an intimidating— yet somewhat playful— man. Suddenly, I felt a strange desire to go find this sound, so I exited through the flaps of the tent.

The cold wind spread goosebumps across my bare skin as I found myself standing face to face with Bigfoot. My stomach felt like it was doing backflips, and my cheeks flushed red.

The hairy Bigfoot was a muscular giant, its chiseled body towering over me as I suddenly felt very, very small. His musky scent wafted into my nose, only attracting me further.

And its eyes, oh its eyes, they sparkled like the stars above itself. It looked down at me and bit its lip nervously— and I realized I was doing the same.

Needless to say, we both slept well in my tent that night.

ruethisday 05/04/18 (Wed) 07:50:12 #52803492


Wait no dude continue please, I need more details, seriously.

🗿 sayfensound 05/04/18 (Wed) 07:53:24 #52834807


Goddamit, this is why we can't have nice things.

You know, amkitty, that Kraken story right above yours gave me some hope. But then you came in here with your shitty fanfic and shattered it all.

Maybe I'll try this megathread another day when you fuckers aren't horny on main or shitposting.

Thread locked, and I'm disappointed in all of you.








Amkitty glared at their ban notice in frustration.

"Well, fine! If they're just gonna make jokes and then ban me, they're not the community I'm looking for anyways. Bah!"

They slammed their laptop closed and stood, wading through their mountain-high piles of old CDs, cardboard boxes, molding leftovers, and cassette tapes, making their way to their living room's television.

Kneeling, they scanned the shelves of DVDs and removed one in particular— A CD labelled "Wendigo + Bigfoot Hot Nasty."

They inserted it into the DVD player and plopped into their couch, hitting the 'play' button on their plastic grey remote.

"How's this for a fanfic?" Amkitty muttered smugly to themselves, knowing that the unbelieving members of Parawatch would never see the… rather exciting film on display before themselves. "Mmm, Oh my God… This is never gonna get old…"