Per 
SCP#: 5691
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures: Keep in Vault made up of Chrome or Titanium walls. Make sure to keep Vault door shut before and after use. Keep locked until use or a production of cleansing is performed.
The SCP must be contained in this Vault until it is destroyed.
Description: SPC-5691 is a Fancy Sentient Toilet with a structure of Marble and Oak wood. Its Seat is extremely comfortable and cannot be damaged. The toilet when sat on will start speaking if you start talking, But it will only speak in a Russian accent. On occasion it would ask you what you would desire, or what you would want to change. It will only talk if you will. if you talk long enough, he will start telling jokes, only in Russian that is. For example, "Что самое лучшее в Швейцарии? Не знаю, но флаг - это большой плюс ". If you ask it questions, it will answer in truths only. Once you leave the Vault, you will have no memories of being in there. But you will have a sudden "Happy" feeling, like being as high as Seth Rogen.
Addendum: *No Addendum*
