CrappyAuthor

Item#: SCP-069-J

Object Class: Appolyon Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-069-J is impossible to contain and it's effects will kill us all with it's anomalous effects. SCP-069-J has been contained by MTF unit ████████ posing as FBI operatives. SCP-069-J is to be contained in a soundproof padded cell 20x20x10 meters big having 20 inches thick walls. There needs to be at least 5 guards outside it's containment at all times. SCP-069-J's padded cell walls has to be replaced biweekly to prevent any more instances of SCP-069-J. During the replacement of SCP-069-J's walls, they must be moved to their temporary cell. By the order of the 05 council, no contact with SCP-069-J is allowed.

Description: SCP-069-J is the name given to a rapper by the name ██████ ███████ which was captured after a report of an individual turning into ██████ ███████ in public. all individuals who've seen the metamorphosis have been administered class A amnesics. The foundation as of now knows only of 10 instances of SCP-069-J which is referred to as SCP-069-J-1 through SCP-069-J-10. If an individual listens to SCP-069-J rap, they will become infected with a brain parasite that makes them believe SCP-069-J is the best rapper in the world and if listened to for over a week, will become another instance of SCP-069-J both in appearance, and DNA after a seemingly painful metamorphosis and the victim no longer has any memories of who they are and what they were before they became an instance of SCP-069-J. SCP-069-J is extremely aggressive to all that dislike it's raps and will attempt to kill the people that dislike it's raps. SCP-069-J is immortal with a incredibly fast healing rate, see addendum 2/5/20██.

Begin Testing Log. 5/2/20██
Dr. B████: D-534857, enter the testing chamber.
<D-534857 proceeds to enter SCP-069-J's containment chamber>
Dr. B████: Ask it the questions on the sheet of paper D-534857.
D-534857: Wait, are you 6ix 9ine?
SCP-069-J-1: yea man
D-534857: HOLY [DATA EXPUNGED]!!! I'VE HEARD SO MUCH ABOUT YOU!!!
Dr. B████: D-534857, ask it the questions or you will be terminated.
<D-534857 proceeds to sit down at the interview table>
D-534857: Alright alright, uhh SCP-069-J, what are your anomalous properties?
SCP-069-J-1: whats that man
D-534857: your… unnatural attributes.
SCP-069-J-1: i can rap i guess
<D-534857 face palms and then continues>
Dr. B████: Stay on topic.
<SCP-069-J starts rapping a rap anyways and the rap is heard by both D-534857 and Dr. B████>
Dr. B████: Oh my god… Keep Going!
<Dr. B████ proceeds to record the rap on their phone>
D-534857: I love your raps!!!
<Guards proceed to come in and take remove both the D-class and Dr. B████. The following week after the test, both Dr. B████ and D-534857 became close friends and listened to 6ix 9ine's rap until the end of the week in which they both became other instances of SCP-069-J labelled SCP-069-J-3 and SCP-069-J-4>

Addendum 1/5/20██:

Dr. Briana: Cross testing between SCP-069-J-10 and SCP-173 will begin soon. We will be able to tell if SCP-173 is affected at all by SCP-069-J's raps.

<173 is released into the testing chamber where SCP-069-J is in>
SCP-069-J: woa dude, the [DATA EXPUNGED] is that thing.
<SCP-069-J proceeds to grab a weed roll from their pocket and starts smoking it and looks away. 173 then snaps his neck and he gets back up 5 seconds later>
SCP-069-J: ey man not nice, imma rap on you now man
<SCP-069-J tries to rap and then gets their neck snapped over and over and over for about half an hour>
Dr. Briana: Shouldn't we stop this now?
Dr. F███████: No, i wanna see them suffer for how annoying they are.
Dr. Briana: Fair enough.
<For about an hour more, SCP-069-J continues to get their neck snapped without even being able to utter out a peep and the test is cancelled>

Dr. Briana: The test was incredibly satisfying if pointless. That ends all possible attempts to cross test.