Per 
Object Name: SCP-J
Object Class: Safe Keter Safe Euclid Thaumiel Keter The Same Damn Dr. Bright Meme Safe Neutralized Just Kinda Exists Explained █████
Description: SCP-J is a memetic SCP that causes indecisiveness in those effected. Well actually its more of a inability to make a decision. Actually more like a disease. Kinda like anxiety, but its more like, I don't know, its memetic that's all we know. We think. No, no its definitely memetic. Yeah, for sure. Other symptoms include rambling and inability to describe anything properly. Symptoms? Uhhh, I mean effects. Properties? Effects.
This has caused several cases of being unable to describe anything, or even coherently document information. The effective range of SCP-J is, like 2-ish meters. Closer to 3, but not quite 3. Or maybe it is three. I don't know I was raised on the Imperial system. Wait, should I be writing numbers as words or actual number? Numbers, right? But some reports have the word and number in parenthesis. Uhhhh, I'll just mix and match.
It appears as a round object made of red crystal. Its not really round though its kinda bumpy a bit, kinda like how the Earth isn't a perfect sphere. No that was a bad example. Like how when you try to roll some dough into a sphere but there's always some bumps in it. Kiiiiiinda like that. You get the point. Also I guess its not reeeally crystal its more glass. Also its more of a maroon color. Or maybe its like a dark orange. Dark orange, is that even a color? No, it has to be right? Like dark blue. No that's stupid. Dark orange, who am I kidding. That's like saying dark white is a color. Is that racist? It's not. But maybe someone would take offense to that…
SCP-J Test Logs Below. Like just scroll lower. Or wait maybe you're using a touch screen. Then just move the screen down. Wait, that is scrolling. Forget what I said. Wait no I have to log my report word for word.
SCP-J Test Log #1
Log: SCP-J was placed in a 3 x 3 x 3 containment cell. Well it was more like 3 x 3 x 3.5. Maybe 3.25 x 3 x 3.5. Researchers were not able to decide where to place SCP-J. As such SCP-J was just allowed to roll around wherever. Well, not wherever, just like wherever in the cell.
SCP-J Test Log #2
Log: No wait it was Test Log #3
Log: No I'm remembering wrong it was #2
Log: I had a long night last night with Dr. ████████. We got a bit crazy and tried playing twister with SCP-███ but we obviously lost. I went home tired but stayed up to watch season 9 (nine) of National Geographic's Exotic Owl Feces' of the World. Was a real heart breaker not going to lie.
Log: I don't think I should be putting this in a test log.
Log: But it should be fine, right?
SCP-J Test Log #three
Log: 2 (two, I think) D-Class personnel were placed in SCP-J's containment cell. They were then given two (2) options; be given a full pardon, or play strip poker while wearing SCP-1525. As obvious as the choice was, the two argued over the course of 19 minutes, unable to make a clear decision. They were eventually forced to play strip poker while wearing SCP-1five25, because we had to do that experiment1 anyway and thought we could kill two birds with one stone. Actually we didn't have to do it. We had nothing better to do. But then again, as researchers we have to do experiments so I guess we did have to. Technically. I guess.
Addendum 1: SCP-J is actually an oval.
Addendum 2: SCP-J is indeed spherical.
Addendum 3: Turns out its just plain red.
Addendum four: Should I be using letters or numbers for addendum?
Addendum A: SCP-J is to be fixed in the middle of its containment by glass case on a one (three minus 2) meter stand.
Addendum B5: Nope, it's an oval.
Addendum A1SteakSauce: No personnel are allowed to enter SCP-J's containment past tea time.
Addendum Schrödinger's Cat is Alive: Ignore all previous addendum.
Addendum Schrödinger's Cat is Dead: Ignore addendum Schrödinger's Cat is Alive.
Addendum Bravo-Whiskey-Foxtrot-Delta-Supreme: I didn't know where to put this info but SCP-J weighs 0000 0011 kilograms. I'm still unsure about the numbering format so if I use all of them I'm sure it'll be fine. For sure. 10zero% No doubt. No doubt at all. Absolutely none. I don't even know the meaning of doubt. What kind of word is doubt anyway. You don't even pronounce the B. Wait is there a B in dout?2
Addendum 5: Yeah, SCP-J is a spherical object.
Addendum 6: Turns out SCP-J is just a normal SCP that can destroy the world, is indestructible, can snap necks, access a pocket dimension, is a reptile, [DATA REDACTED], is the cure, and has a Fine setting, and I just have an anxiety problem.
Note: Dr. ███████ would like to make it very clear any personnel writing reports on SCP objects must be Level-1 or higher and be able to write a piece of ████ report like an adult.
