UserWithAName

Item #: SCP-DJBLT?-J

Object Class: Twinkies

Special Containment Procedures: Oh god no.

Description: SCP-DJBLT?-J is a humanoid figure who is apparently immortal. The object decided to destroy half of the world's Twinkie supply.¹
SCP-DJBLT?-J decided to take a bite out of a Twinkie. The object thought the Twinkie tasted like very soggy bread. SCP-DJBLT?-J finally decided to say sorry to the manufacturer of the Twinkies.

Incidents Log

+ Incident 1`

Details: SCP-DJBLT?-J was walking around, when all of a sudden, someone smashed their Twinkie into his coat. Approximately 20 seconds after, the object pulled out two(2) Twinkie Killers from it's pockets and shot at all the Twinkies he saw.

+ Incident 2

Details: Upon Dr. Bright's arrival, everyone at Twinkies4Life HQ ate exactly twenty one(21) Twinkies and activated protocol TWINKIE MEN. Upon protocol TWINKIE MEN's activation, the site's Nuclear Bob blew up….² on Instagram.

Addendum

+ Addendum

Dr. Theodore, lead researcher of SCP-DJBLT?-J: What? No, testing is not allowed to be done on SCP-DJBLT?-J.

Footnotes

1. SCP-DJBLT?-J's actions are still under investigation.

2. The NBD, or Nuclear Bob Device, is the most dangerous bomb known to existence.