edgarallenbinch

EdgarAllen's Draft Page

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: Safe class —> stored in locker within Site-X. Level 3 Security Clearance is required to access and test on SCP. Testing of object requires Level 4 Clearance and vinyl records must be in good condition as to prevent any "skipping" or distortion. Extra caution is be exercised for songs affected by inner groove distortion.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a [L] by [W] Thorens TD124 model turntable. The exterior of SCP-XXXX is modified with retractable table legs at its base and decorated with a layer of green paint1. Dismantling SCP-XXXX has revealed a multitude of mechanical parts not found in standard turntable models, including parts indicating origin from Prometheus Labs and parts not yet identified with any function.

When not in use SCP-XXXX is considered non-anomalous. Anomalous effects arise when SCP-XXXX is used to play any phonograph record. [Finish desc. later]

Discovery: [Ideas for someone/thing that found use for SCP.]

  • Restaurant/cafeteria/mess hall/etc. using object with vinyl record of song "Yesterday" to anomalously mass produce scrambled eggs.
    • Discovered after building/town began flooding with eggs due to a scratch on the record, causing the disc on SCP-XXXX to "skip," nearly resulting in an NK-Class "Grey Goo" scenario. K-Class scenario was narrowly avoided after the batteries powering SCP-XXXX ran out.
  • Recreational use of SCP-XXXX to play the vinyl album "Help!" —> anomalously launched flares of unknown origin around, starting a fire and burning down several blocks in city.

Addendum XXXX.1: [How were notes discovered?]

  • 1st Entry: Dated sometime in late 1965. Author expresses complaints how kids don't go outside / don't appreciate nature anymore, caring more about music/Beatlemania/teen dance party & variety TV shows/etc.
  • 2nd Entry: Author comes up with idea to mesh these two hobbies and starts brainstorming different inventions to meet this end.
  • 3rd Entry: Author describes his crazy idea to make a Ten Essentials record player and aspirations of it becoming the next big thing.
  • 4th Entry: Process of making parts and modifying the turntable, designed for campers to take along with them on hikes and camp outs.
  • 5th Entry: Author describes problems encountered (parts, design, financial situation, etc.). Makes changes to improve invention. Also describes testing of invention with a vinyl record that was popular in late 1966/ early 1967 and unfavorable results.
  • 6-9th Entry: Author's financial situation worsens over time and progress on invention slows down. Despite this expresses determination to complete invention.
  • 2nd to last Entry: Invention/SCP-XXXX is completed. Author describes satisfaction with project and his plans to go camping in X place and test SCP-XXXX in the field.
  • Final Entry: "WHO THE HELL WOULD TAKE A RECORD PLAYER CAMPING"2