Fappy Hands Sandbox

The Merry Gang (pt. 1)

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: Undercover agents are to be assigned in pairs to patrol duty in the town of Diablo Bay, ██, wearing standard police uniforms. Agents on duty are allowed to establish a stationary watch or to freely roam the streets in their assigned patrol cars. Agents must, at all times, listen to the local police radio frequency and be prepared to act in the case of SCP-xxx action, being especially vigilant for the mention of the code name “the merry gang”. In the case of a flagrante delicto being committed in the presence of agents of the Foundation, they’re allowed to act accordingly to their expected functions to the strictly necessary extent not to raise suspicion. Absolutely no personnel sensible to extreme violence, sexual abuse or gruesome scenes is to be assigned to this task.

Description: SCP-xxx is a criminal group acting in the Diablo Bay area, dedicated in exclusive to the commission of sexual aggressions and known for their increasingly brutal attacks. In order to prevent the spread of panic in the population, local police has been instructed to keep these attacks a secret whenever possible. SCP-xxx’s modus operandi includes the recording of the attacks with what appears to be a cell phone camera. These videos are then sent to the victim through the popular instant messaging application ████████. All media files of the incidents have been intervened by the Foundation and archived in the Incident Repository.

+ Incident 001

Video file: sharking.mp4
Injury report: No injuries
Summary: Video shows a young girl walking home alone in a poorly lightened street. Subject is wearing a short skirt and a backpack and facing away from the camera. High-pitched laughter and other mocking sounds resembling those of a clown can be heard. Subject appears unaware of this. The attacker rapidly approaches the victim. At that point, the camera shaking makes it impossible to describe what’s happening, but it is heavily implied by the context and the surprised vocalization of the subject that the cameraman has pulled her underwear down and is running away from the victim. Generalized laughter from SCP-xxx can be heard before the video ends.
Footage of the incident was shortly after sent to the victim’s phone, who decided to report the incident to the police believing that the attacker must have been someone close enough to her to have her phone number. The message was accompanied by the text “lol”. Further investigations could not find the source of this message.

+ Incident 002

Video file: showers.mp4
Injury report: No injuries
Summary: Video starts with footage of a girl showering in the Diablo Bay’s High School locker room showers. The incident took place in the evening (the high school usually rents the sports pavilion to local sports clubs when unused) shortly before closing time, with the victim being the last person left. SCP-xxx’s characteristic laughter can be heard as a dark grey hand takes the victim’s towel, and then, her sports bag and clothes before leaving the room and hiding behind a large trash can. Additional high-pitched vocalizations can be heard, indicating the presence of at least another individual in the scene. After a few moments, the subject’s voice can be heard calling and asking from the inside of the locker room. This goes on for several minutes, during which the subject becomes increasingly desperate and demanding. After spending a few more minutes in a distressed state, the subject exits the locker room crying in anger, covering herself with her hands, and heads over to the janitress’s booth.
Subject’s belongings where later found hanging from a tree branch outside of the building. The video of the incident and a popular emoticon known as “trollface” where sent to the subject’s phone.

+ Incident 003

Video file: laundry.mp4
Injury report: Some bruising around the victim’s wrists and minor vaginal tearing consistent with that of a typical forced coitus
Summary: A dark grey hand, similar to that visible in the “showers.mp4” video appears in the initial moments of the footage taking a pair of glasses from a desk. The attack happened during nighttime in a shared students’ apartment. At the time of the incident, the victim was home alone. Some minutes later, a thin, awkward-looking girl is seen navigating the house with some difficulty. Subject utters an expletive, stands still for a second, turns around and starts to pick up dirty clothes from the floor of her room. Subject then walks towards the laundry room as SCP-xxx’s vocalizations increase. The victim looks around for a moment, as if unsure of having heard something, but finally opens the door of a dimly lit laundry room. The camera moves closer to the girl and a scrawny (but not bony), dark grey figure is seen sitting in a corner in fetal position, facing away from the camera. It is unclothed, and its head is slightly rounder and bigger than usual, with no hair and no ears. The subject approaches slowly to the corner, not knowing SCP-xxx’s identity. Just as she’s about to touch its shoulder, SCP-xxx turns its head 180 degrees, revealing a pair of round, glowing white eyes and a grotesquely large smiling mouth that erupts into manic laughter. A sexual assault is committed by one of the SCP-xxxs as the other films it. Subject was administered Class-A Amnestics. As usual, video footage was sent with an emoticon depicting a face crying of laughter. No genetic material could be retrieved.

+ Incident 004

Video file: alley.mp4
Injury report: Bruising in face, arms and torso; minor vaginal tearing
Summary: The victim is shown walking towards the camera in an alley. Mocking, non-verbal catcalls can be heard in the distance. Subject turns her head nervously and starts to walk at a faster pace. Two dark still silhouettes are visible at the end of the alley in unconventional poses, with their torsos slightly leaned back, shoulders angled and knees bent. They move in an unnatural, spasmodic way, and twist their arms over their heads in postures reminiscent of trained contortionists. Their heads twitch occasionally and large, owl-like eyes can be seen glowing faintly, like those of nocturnal animals. As the victim is reaching the other end of the alley, three more creatures emerge in front of her, laughing and grinning with their oversized mouths. The subject panics and tries to run away, but two SCP-xxxs quickly hunt her down. Showing a degree of violence relatively higher than the previous attack, the creatures pin the subject against a wall, rip her clothes off and collectively assault her. After the incident, they abandon the victim in a dumpster, where she was later found in shock. Video footage was received with the text “xD”.

+ Incident 005

Video file: bathroom.mp4
Injury report: Bruising in the scapulae and lumbar areas, arms and back of the head; minor damages due to repeated trauma force applied to the occipital area; anal and vaginal tearing
Summary: Video shows the assault of a female subject in an isolated public bathroom perpetrated by three SCP-xxxs (not including the cameramen). The victim is surprised by one creature blocking the exit door, one hiding in a stall behind her and another one slithering under the door of the farthest bathroom stall. Subject's head is forcefully pushed in [REMOVED] seconds before she is brutally assaulted and beaten. SCP-xxx’s twitching and spasmodic movement is consistent with previous incidents. At the 15:14 mark, one of the creatures throws its head back and a thick, bulbous tongue, measuring at least 30 centimeters in length is visible. The message sent was accompanied by an emoticon depicting a smiling devilish face.

+ Incident 006

Video file: gym.mp4
Injury report: Rope burns around the wrists and ankles; some bruising; minor vaginal and anal tearing; mild poisoning; major tearing on the sides of the mouth
Summary: The incident takes place in a small, old gymnasium where the victim is shown training alone. Subject is wearing a one-piece gymnastics suit and covered in sweat. After finishing her exercises, the victim is attacked by SCP-xxx, but manages to fight them for a while. Due to the difficulty posed by the immobilization of the victim, SCP-xxx eventually use rope to tie the subject face-down to an old-style, wooden pommel horse. At this point, coitus ensues, including forced irrumatio. The footage ends abruptly some minutes later, as agents of the Foundation interrupt the attack. Several shots were fired, wounding one of the creatures in its shoulder. As reported by the agents, SCP-xxx’s characteristic smile vanished, and a facial expression described as “extremely hateful” appeared on their faces. The creatures immediately turned hostile against the agents, resulting in [REDACTED]. SCP-xxx fled, allowing the agents to untie the victim, who was found unconscious. While being transported in the ambulance, the subject vomited a white substance. Analysis revealed no presence of sperm cells, but large quantities of [REDACTED]. After surgery, the victim was left with permanent scarring on the sides of her mouth. An emoticon depicting a sad face shedding a single tear was received.

+ Incident 007

Video file: pool.mp4
Injury report: Signs of hypothermia; major bruising; anal tearing; head trauma
Summary: Video depicts a cleaning lady in her twenties working around an indoors pool shortly after its closing time. Footage shows extreme use of violence, repeated and prolonged submerging of the victim’s head and several instances of loss of consciousness and vomiting. Subject was found immobile showing signs of hypothermia. During the assault, SCP-xxx manifested the ability to last underwater for extended periods of time and to move effectively in an aqueous medium. The emoticon received by the victim depicted a happy clown’s face. Subject committed suicide a few days after the incident, despite the administration of amnestics.

+ Incident 008

Video file: ranch.mp4
Injury report: Major vaginal and anal tearing; electric burns around the nipple area; burning marks on the right buttock; generalized signs of force trauma; ankle injury
Summary: Victim was assaulted in a secluded ranch, three kilometers north of the town, at dusk, when she was alone. The video was shot from the interior of the house, and shows a young girl reading a book in her living room. A tapping sound is heard coming from the window behind her. She gets up and checks the window, but finds nothing and returns to her reading. SCP-xxx’s giggling is audible near the camera. Glowing white eyes appear for a moment outside the window. After several minutes, subject goes upstairs, followed by the camera, and goes to the bathroom, leaving the door open just enough for the camera to get a view of the interior. The girl is sitting on the toilet when a strange movement of the shower curtain attracts her attention. When she finishes and gets up to check the shower, more SCP-xxx vocalizations are captured. She opens the curtains, revealing one of the creatures with its arms spiraled around its head that laughs hysterically. The subject screams and manages to run away to her bedroom, closing the door behind her. Heavy breathing is heard coming from the other side of the door, as SCP-xxx emit a variety of mocking howls. Laughter, allegedly coming from under the bed of the closed room is suffocated by a prolonged cry and loud sounds. The cameraman runs outside the house with just enough time to capture the victim trying to escape throughout the window and injuring one of her ankles during the fall. She then tries to reach her pickup truck, but is quickly outrun by her attackers and captured. The remaining footage consists of approximately two hours of coerced sex acts and torture, including the use of jumper cables, a livestock branding tool and [REMOVED]. At the 1:58:47 mark, an unfocused and barely visible figure is immobile in the background of the scene; it is currently unknown if this shape corresponds to a human being (or even to an animated object). Subject was later found alive, but in severe pain. Subject euthanized. Text message received was a winking face.

+ Incident 009

[ACCESS DENIED]

»APPLY LEVEL 4 CLEARANCE CREDENTIALS TO CONTINUE«

The Merry Gang (pt. 2)

»LEVEL 4 CLEARANCE CREDENTIALS ACCEPTED«

+ Incident 009

Video file: foundation.mp4
Injury report: Major mutilation and dismemberment of all four limbs; severe burns covering 100% of the body; loss of sight and audition; irreversible failure of most internal organs; bone structure severely damaged
Summary: Footage was recorded in the interior of Site [DATA EXPUNGED] on [DATA EXPUNGED], showing Dr. Valentina entering the antechamber to the containment cell of [DATA EXPUNGED]. As Dr. Valentina is distracted in the interior of the antechamber, SCP-xxx locks the door from the exterior while they wave at her through the reinforced ballistic glass window of the door and laugh. Agitated, Dr. Valentina runs towards the door and repeatedly hits the glass with the palm of her hand, asking SCP-xxx to open the door. At this point, one of the creatures activates the cell’s throw switch, causing a containment breach of [DATA EXPUNGED] into the antechamber, severely injuring Dr. Valentina. Corruption of the video file caused by the accidental destruction of the recording device during the neutralization of the threat preclude viewing of the remaining footage.
Five corpses of SCP-xxx, labeled SCP-xxx-1 to SCP-xxx-5 sent to the site’s morgue. One individual, labeled SCP-xxx-6, captured alive, was subsequently vivisected. SCP-xxx-6 was confirmed to have survived vivisection and is to be closed and kept restrained on the vivisection table for further experimentation. It is currently unknown if more instances of SCP-xxx exist or if they are aware of the Foundation’s location.
Dr. Valentina was found to be pregnant as a result of the attack and is to be kept artificially alive for research purposes.
Despite the destruction of the recording device, multimedia transference to the victim’s phone was successful. A message was retrieved containing the text “brb”.

+ Dissection Room Live Feed

The Fat Worm

Incineration chamber access

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-xxx is to be contained in a vacuum-sealed room in Site █’s biohazard containment section. This room shall have absolutely no access points, including ventilation conducts or any other type of opening, except for a vacuum-sealed passage through an incineration chamber. Fresh oxygen is to be pumped into SCP-xxx’s containment room twice a day. All personnel entering SCP-xxx’s room is required to wear a decontamination suit (and only a decontamination suit). This suit is to be disposed of and incinerated when exiting the room, as any other item introduced during the visit. Adjacent to the containment room, a second area equipped with showers is to be guarded by two armed agents. Any personnel intentionally attempting to leave the incineration chamber without removing the mandatory suit or not showering is to be shot and incinerated immediately. All water used by the decontamination showers must be boiled before dumping it into the sewage system.

Description: SCP-xxx was discovered during the police investigation of a disappearance in ██████ ███, ██. The missing person was a 17-year-old Caucasian male, last seen by his parents entering his bedroom after returning from a walk with a friend. Upon breaking into the room, the teenager was nowhere to be found, the window had not been opened and the door was locked from the inside. SCP-xxx was retrieved by agents of the Police Department from his room.

At the time of its discovery, SCP-xxx had the outer appearance of a pink masturbator sleeve. It was found sitting on the missing teenager’s desk and appeared to be still lubricated, with a drip of a viscous liquid visible under its front opening. SCP-xxx measured approximately 26.5 centimeters in length with a diameter of 8.5 centimeters, had a texture similar to that of materials commonly used in most commercial male masturbators and was warm to the touch.

SCP-xxx attracted the attention of Foundation agents when it was reported that the object’s body exhibited barely noticeable movements akin to those of “a live animal trying to play dead”. SCP-xxx was then moved to Site █.

+ Experiment SCP-xxx-1

D-████, a 36-year-old African American male, was placed in a closed room with SCP-xxx for initial testing. Due to the fear for possible memetic effects, no agents and no camera surveillance were present. Visual aids were placed in the room and communication with the research team was made through a wireless headset equipped with a microphone.
Audio transcription:

<Begin Log>

Dr. ███: Okay, can you hear me, D-████?

D-████: I hear you, doc.

Dr. ███: Can you see an elongated object in the table in front of you?

D-████: Yeah, doc, I see the pussy and the porno on the TV. The hell is this!?

Dr. ███: This is the testing you’ve been assigned to. Please, proceed with the insertion and describe your impressions.

D-████: [laughs] Doc, you crazy motherfucker…

Dr. ███: Please, proceed.

D-████: Okay, here we go, better than [REDACTED] I guess… It’s… nice? Warm and soft. It has a cool texture…

Dr. ███: Go on.

D-████: I never needed to use one of these, doc, but… You know? It’s not bad at all… It’s like… moving and everything. [pauses] Oh, hell, this thing has a good suction! Oh, wow! OH! AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!! Shiiiiiiiiiii…!!!!

Dr. ███: Please, D-████, keep vocalizations to a minimum in order to avoid confusion during testing…

D-████: AAAAAHHHHGGGGBBBBLRRGGGG [wet guttural sounds]

Dr. ███: Send the guards! Send the guards!!

<End Log>

Experiment SCP-xxx-1 was ended prematurely and D-████’s corpse could not be recovered. SCP-xxx was found having formed a dark brownish cocoon attached to one of the upper corners of the testing room. The creature’s cocoon had the texture and consistency of molten and re-solidified plastic.

SCP-xxx emerged from its cocoon three days later in a more mature form, similar in color and texture, but resembling a female’s hips and waist, with undeveloped limbs ending in stumps. The abdomen analog of this new form appeared slightly viscous and sticky. The specimen was immediately secured and scheduled for further testing.

+ Experiment SCP-xxx-2

D-████, a 24-year-old Hispanic male, was placed in a room with SCP-xxx, three armed guards and no video surveillance. D-████ was instructed to copulate with SCP-xxx’s new form. As usual, the creature remained still during most of the experiment. Approximately four seconds after insertion, what seemed to be an extremely intense vacuum started pulling D-████ into the interior of SCP-xxx. Personnel present during the test had to receive psychological attention, having found “the sound of bones being broken and crushed” and “the viewing of D-████ being compacted into SCP-xxx” highly distressing. Other than these symptoms, affected personnel were unharmed and memetic hazard was definitively discarded. The body of the subject could not be retrieved, and SCP-xxx was later found having rooted itself in the ground, near one of the corners of the testing room, making its relocation impossible.

+ Incident xxx-A

After five days following the conclusion of Experiment SCP-xxx-2, the creature had had undergone further structural changes. Several large surfaces, resembling leaves commonly found on tropical plants, had grown around the point where SCP-xxx had anchored itself to the ground forming a structure of approximately 15 centimeters tall and 70 centimeters in diameter, composed of what seemed to be entangled, exposed roots. From the center of this structure, a flexible, black, 60 centimeters tall, 40 centimeters in diameter sheath, covering a theorized soft abdomen had developed. This part of the creature showed signs of being capable of some degree of lateral movement, stretching and contracting, although SCP-xxx itself still preferred to remain almost completely motionless. From this sheath’s upper opening, fleshy parts, with a texture identical to the specimen’s previous forms, and closely resembling a female’s hips, buttocks and complete legs, protruded. The terminal part these leg-like limbs did not form feet-analogous structures, ending instead in rigid, non-differentiated rounded points.

+ Experiment SCP-xxx-3

D-████, a 26-year-old Caucasian male with a history of sexual misconduct and compulsive behavior, was placed in SCP-xxx’s containment cell and given a bed to sleep on. The subject was not given any kind of instructions and surveillance cameras where placed in the cell. D-████ sat in the bed for approximately 15 minutes, looking at SCP-xxx from a distance. After this time was elapsed, D-████ progressively approached the creature in an erratic way, stepping forwards and backwards intermittently. During all this time, SCP-xxx remained perfectly motionless, with its pseudo-legs in the air, flexed in a relaxed position. 45 minutes following the experiment’s initiation, D-████ established contact with the specimen, touching and caressing the inner section of its appendages. D-████ spent an additional 4 minutes examining the anatomy of SCP-xxx before proceeding with the attempted coitus. Exactly after full insertion was achieved, SCP-xxx’s extremities snapped in an extremely fast manner, closing on D-████ in a motion reminiscent of those of predatory mantises. The subject was subsequently consumed, ending the experiment, and no corpse could be salvaged.

+ Incident xxx-B

In the week posterior to Experiment SCP-xxx-3, the specimen grew noticeably larger in size, with its retractable section almost reaching the cell’s ceiling when fully extended. Its roots expanded to a radius of 1 meter, with more, bigger leaves stemming from it in a radial distribution. Likewise, SCP-xxx’s upper part increased in size and muscular mass, surpassing the normal human being’s lower body dimensions by a rate of 1.5:1.

Analysis performed on SCP-xxx after the reaching of its mature stage revealed the generalized presence of a very fine powder covering the entirety of SCP-xxx’s body in different proportions. On the underside of the creature’s leaves, this powder was so abundant that it was visible with the naked eye as a thin layer of a white substance similar to talcum. Due to the particle size of this powder, the most minor physical contact with SCP-xxx and even abrupt changes in airflow proved to be enough to suspend small amounts of it in the air, causing contamination of objects or personnel nearby. This powder was later found to be composed of microscopic eggs, with photomicrographing showing [REDACTED] in its interior.

For this reason, all further testing of SCP-xxx was subsequently restricted, and a call for the emergency construction of current containment infrastructure around the specimen’s cell was made.

Incident xxx-C
On ██/██/████, accidental ingestion of SCP-xxx’s powder by Dr. Richards evidenced [DATA EXPUNGED] as secondary effect. Dr. Richards was administered Class-A Amnestics.
Dr. A. Ivankova has requested testing for the identification of effects caused by the ingestion of SCP-xxx’s powder by female subjects. Request denied.

The Oil Warmer

Fig. 1: Recovered item

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-xxx’s current owner is agent ████. A plasticized label containing his name is to be kept encased in a glass container in the immediate proximity of SCP-xxx. The label must be protected from heat, fire, corrosion and physical damage at all times. In the event of agent ████’s death and/or destruction of the aforementioned label, a new owner is to be chosen according to Protocol Kappa-7. Both this label and SCP-xxx are to be stored together in a standard cardboard box in [REDACTED].

Description: SCP-xxx is an oil warmer found by Dr. Valentina in a store in ██████ ███, ██. SCP-xxx’s anomalous properties didn’t become evident to Dr. Valentina until several days after the purchase. Those effects have not been confirmed by the Foundation and current containment procedures are based on Dr. Valentina’s testimony alone. No testing for the confirmation of alleged effects is allowed to any Foundation personnel irrespective of clearance level.

Addendum xxx-1: Recovery testimony by Dr. Valentina

I found the oil warmer in a Chinese antiquities’ shop on [REDACTED]. I was shopping for exotic-looking decorations for my apartment and I somehow ended in that creepy, old place; it had lots of shady products on the shelves, and even an amputated monkey hand laying around, but, since I’ve been working for the Foundation for a couple years now, I guess I’m not as easily scared as I used to be.
So, I found the oil warmer there, sitting in the counter, next to a small piece of paper with some scribbles in it. The owner said it was a lucky charm. I asked the wrinkly, old man to buy it, but he wouldn’t sell it. He said he was keeping it for someone else and pointed at the names written in the paper with his finger, tapping it with a long, nasty nail. When I asked who those were, he simply answered that they were people who “have brought great disgrace to others”. When I asked him why keep an object for people like that, all I got was that “they’re the rightful owners” and that “Heaven’s net casts wide, but nothing slips by”. I thought it was silly to keep waiting for people like that to come back, as it looked like the paper had been written a long time ago already, so I argued with him for a good 15 minutes until he agreed to sell it to me with the condition that, if the owners ever came back, I’ll have to return it to them. I said yes, he noted my name and phone number and handed me the oil warmer and the list with the names on it. As I was leaving, he reminded me one more time that I was only temporarily allowed to keep it.
Of course, I had no intention to give it back. I found that premise ridiculous. I left my new acquisition untouched for a few days, as I had a lot of lab work pending, but, when I returned home, I threw the piece of paper in the toilet, flushed it, and poured some aromatic oil in the thing. I couldn’t even finish bathing when I received the phone call.
It was the storeowner, and he was not happy. He told me now I was the rightful owner. I was about to ask how he knew I got rid of the note, but then I noticed the oil warmer had vanished. Now, I have had enough experience with skips to know that something strange was going on, so I hanged the phone and thought for a long time if I should go back there. It was a hard and scary decision, but, as the days passed, I grew confident and decided to return to that damned store.
There it was, sitting on top of the note with my name and phone number, the fucking oil warmer. The guy smiled and said that “it finds its way”, but that I was allowed to take it with me again; this time, forever. The next question, evidently was what had happened with the other guys, the previous owners. Again, only cryptic answers. He said that you cannot trick the fortune, only borrow from it. “Have today the bliss for tomorrow, and tomorrow you’ll have none to have”. It sounded more like hangover prevention advice… It was at this point that I knew I had to inform the Foundation about it.

Addendum xxx-2: On ██/██/████, a recovery team was sent to the shop in [REDACTED]. The shop was raided and SCP-xxx easily found. Mr. ████, the storeowner, resisted the agents’ attempts to reclaim the object, grabbing agent ████’s arm as he was proceeding with his mission. In the brief struggle, a candle was accidentally knocked down over the counter, causing a small fire that was easily suffocated. Mr. ████ immediately surrendered, telling agent ████ that “it is yours now”. A small, charred handwritten note, not legible anymore, was rescued from the fire appearing to have contained a name. When interrogated about it, Mr. ████ would simply reply that it was “someone who has brought great disgrace to others”.

Addendum xxx-3: Following the events occurred during Incident ████, all records about or mentioning Dr. Valentina, both inside and outside the Foundation are to be destroyed. Dr. Valentina has never existed. These changes are to be made effective 30 natural days after the publication of this order (██/██/████). —The O5 Council

Shady Virility Pills

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-xxx-1 is to be kept properly labeled and stored in a cabinet at Site █’s research section. This cabinet is to be locked at all times except when authorized investigation is taking place. No guards or surveillance of any type are necessary for the enforcing of this protocol. SCP-xxx-2 is to be kept contained in a Petri dish in Site █’s Laboratory C. Cryogenization is recommended but not required for the storage of SCP-xxx-2. All personnel coming into contact with SCP-xxx-2 shall wear acid-resistant laboratory clothes. In case of escape or accidental damage to the aforementioned Petri dish, Laboratory C must be immediately sealed and SCP-xxx-2 is to be physically reduced and recontained through the use of a standard pressurized water hose.

Description: SCP-xxx-1 is an empty green bottle of pills of approximately six centimeters in height. The bottle was already empty when discovered. SCP-xxx-1 allegedly contained a total of 16 virility pills when first acquired by its previous owner. The label on the bottle is relatively deteriorated and written in English by a non-native speaker or translated from another language (most likely Mandarin) via machine translation. The label reads as follows:

DRAGON VIRILITY PILL
To contain 16 pill.
Help enlarge male genital. To eat one immediately before sex act.
Do not eat more than one pill at a time.
Effect to last up to 3 hour. Bigger genital up to 5 cm. Wider. Stamina increase.
LITTLE HEART, VERY IMPORTANT NOT TO EAT MORE THAN ONE AT A TIME.
If eat two or more pill, please to contact Mr. ████ immediately.

SCP-xxx-1 was retrieved as evidence from the scene of a possible crime being investigated by the Police Department of ██████ ███, ██. Upon arrival to the scene, two naked bodies, one male and one female, were found in the bedroom of the apartment. The man, a 24-year-old Caucasian, was discovered next to the bed, in the space between it and an antique dressing table, with his knees on the floor, his torso in parallel to the ground and his arms and head hanging lifeless. The man’s face had been completely disfigured by the contact with an acidic solution. The woman, also a 24-year-old Caucasian, was laying down at the door, with her legs still inside the room and her upper body in the corridor. She had suffered an incapacitating acid injury in her right Achilles tendon and further damage in the back of the neck, which proved to be fatal.

SCP-xxx-1 was found on the night table alongside two used condoms, one of them broken. SCP-xxx-2 was later captured in the apartment by agents of the Foundation as it displayed its predatory nature. Testing in the Foundation’s laboratory revealed SCP-xxx-2 to be a human ejaculate of slightly larger than average volume. SCP-xxx-2’s sperm count showed that approximately half of the sample’s sperm cells were dead, immobile or missing parts, while the other half had been replaced by microscopic flat snakes with fully formed bone systems. The specimen as a whole was extremely agile and aggressive for the entire duration of the experiment.

Eldritch Crabs from Outer Space

Current localization of SCP-XXXX on Europa

WORK IN PROGRESS

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: All radio waves emitted by SCP-XXXX are to be prevented from detection by civilians. All objects sent by SCP-XXXX must be intercepted by Foundation agents before landing or as soon as possible after the impact with the surface of the Earth in order to prevent civilian contact. Absolutely no violence is to be exerted against SCP-XXXX and mutual relationships must be as friendly as possible at all times, although monitoring of SCP-XXXX activities remain a top priority.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a colony of exobiological entities stationed in Site Europa/Jupiter II. SCP-XXXX is sentient, sapient and, as of ██/██/████, capable of understanding human language and communicating with the Foundation. SCP-XXXX was discovered in ██/██/████, when a radio signal of extraterrestrial origin was received by the Rahasyamaya radio telescope in ████████████, ██. The signal was first believed to be a local radio wave reflected back to Earth by a piece of space debris. This was later confirmed when further examination of the signal found it to be a corrupted version of a manmade piece of music being broadcasted at the time; however, such a confirmation was proved to be erroneous as subsequent radio signals kept being received along the following days.

+ Received messages 001

Day1	Contents
3	A composition of human voices counting up to ten. After each number is mentioned, a number of tones equal to it are played at a regular interval of approximately 0.784 seconds. Iterations for the Mandarin, English, Spanish, Hindi, Arabic, Portuguese, Russian and Japanese languages were received.
5	The word “circle”, followed by the enumeration of the first 1,000 digits of Pi, in all the aforementioned languages.
6	The following elements, in this order: the word “triangle”, three tones played at regular intervals, the words “square” and “rectangle”, four tones played at regular intervals, the word “circle”, one tone, the word “ellipse”, two tones. Iterations consistent with previous signals.
8	An ordered list of the colors of the visible spectrum followed by black and white, then gray, in all the usual languages.
9	The word for “Hello” in all the usual languages.
19	An attempt at communication was received for the first time. The message, sent in all 8 languages, contained the following sentences: “We are listening. Always listening. Listening everything.”
22	“Three hundred and sixty-five days, six hours, twelve months, fours weeks, seven days, twenty-four hours, sixty minutes, sixty seconds, the Sun. Earth.”

+ Received messages 002

On ██/██/████, the Foundation decided to send a contact signal towards the source of these signals. All subsequent contact attempts made by SCP-XXXX from this point have been in English.

<Begin Log>

Sent ██/██/████: Hello?

Received ██/██/████: Hello. We are listening.

Sent ██/██/████: Who are you?

Received ██/██/████: We are the crab.

Sent ██/██/████: What do you want?

Received ██/██/████: We want knowledge, culture, language. Send book of all words. Send book of all knowledge.

Sent ██/██/████: Do you want to send knowledge to us or do you want us to send it to you?

[Note: No reply was received for approximately two weeks and it was theorized that SCP-XXXX spent this time researching a translation. Simpler language is advised for future interrogation]

Received ██/██/████: You send now.

<End Log>

On ██/██ /████, a Council was formed to discuss SCP-XXXX’s request. After three hours of deliberation, it was decided that, considering that SCP-XXXX already had access to all radio signals collectively emitted by humanity, the transfer of an English dictionary and an Encyclopedia involved a negligible threat to human safety. Request approved.

+ Received messages 003

<Begin Log>

Sent ██/██/████: Sending…

Received ██/██/████: Received. We thank you.

Sent ██/██/████: Will you go home now?

Received ██/██/████: Home is no more. We go to Earth. Three weeks.

Sent ██/██/████: Negative. No visitors allowed.

Received ██/██/████: No visitors. Friends. We help. Two weeks, four days.

Sent ██/██/████: Don’t. Stay away from Earth. Then we can be friends.

<End Log>

+ Received messages 004

On ██/██/████, an SCP-XXXX colony was established in Europa, Jupiter’s second moon, and large-scale broadcasting initiated. It was theorized that these signals contained SCP-XXXX television equivalent and were destined to internal consumption, but inability for the decryption of its data prevented its analysis. All received signals were stored for later study.

<Begin Log>

Received ██/██/████: We wait here now.

Sent ██/██/████: Good enough.

Received ██/██/████: DNA sequenced yet?

Sent ██/██/████: Yes, we have already sequenced our DNA.

Received ██/██/████: Send.

Sent ██/██/████: What for?

Received ██/██/████: Gift. Send. Now.

<End Log>

On ██/██/████, a second Council met to discuss SCP-XXXX’s new request. The risk of providing the human genome code to an alien species with unknown intentions was deemed too big to be considered, given the potential for biological warfare and engineering. The genetic code of a Pan paniscus was provided to SCP-XXXX instead. A reply was received a month later containing several alterations to the original and was employed by the Foundation in Experiment █████████, determining that modified individuals were purged of all genetic defects, developed healthier, fitter, more symmetrical bodies and brains and were immune to all types of cancers, cardiovascular diseases and psychiatric disorders. In addition, immune system was generally found to be stronger. Long-term observation revealed that the specimens never seemed to age, or did so at a rate too slow to be detected.

Given the desirability for replication of this outcome in humans, extrapolation techniques are currently being researched, as well as medical monitoring of the Pan paniscus subjects to discard long-term damage. It is strictly prohibited to seek help from SCP-XXXX for this purpose, as it is not currently known what reaction could be triggered in SCP-XXXX should be initial deception be discovered.

+ Exchange log

Since ██/██/████, regular collaboration between SCP-XXXX and the Foundation has been taking place, usually in the form of mutually beneficial exchanges. SCP-XXXX's requests generally are based around information about Earth's culture, while rewards consist mostly on biological specimens or pieces of advanced technology.

Request	Reward		Status
A quality selection of handpicked musical compositions.	A spherical capsule of approximately 2 meters in height was sent to Earth. Upon arrival, it was found to contain several metal plates of an unknown alloy labeled as "Hard thing". Testing proved it to be 12% stronger than graphene.		Approved
A quality selection of handpicked paintings.	A capsule transporting several boxes labeled as "Delicious meat", containing small animals roughly resembling hamster-sized Bathynomus giganteus. The specimens were toxic to humans, but resulted in valuable information about exobiological organisms.		Approved
An encyclopedia containing all knowledge available about the history of Earth's Philosophy.	A capsule carrying several bottles of a transparent liquid labeled as "Medicine". When drank, test subjects died 2 minutes after consumption, with autopsies finding rigid internal organs inside their bodies. When topically applied, it was found to rapidly calcify subject's skin, sealing any present wounds. Possible use as an emergency treatment is awaiting further experimentation, although application to regions close to a joint seem improbable.		Approved
An anomalous item from Earth, or information about it.	No reward received.		Denied
Information about the ingredients and preparation methods of traditional Earth food, including chemical composition of said ingredients.	A capsule containing a water tank labeled as "Fishes", whose interior was inhabited by two elongated creatures loosely resembling a long, eyeless, whiskered koi carps. Due to the specimens' superior elegance, they were not dissected and instead had been placed in a decorative pond in the reception hall of Site ██2.		Approved
24 hours of video footage consisting on the average day of an Earth inhabitant, and including at least one copulation, three varied meals and recreational activities.	A capsule labeled "Worms", found broken and with its contents missing as it couldn't be intercepted before impacting near ██████ ███, ██, because of a [DATA EXPUGNED] incident.		Approved
Same as previous request, opposite sex subject.	A capsule carrying a variety of technological devices, currently awaiting testing authorization.		Approved
None.	An empty capsule equipped with a stasis pod. An attached card was found containing the text "A cordial invitation to a research stay abroad for one Earth scientist".		Approved

On ██/██/████, researcher Julia Zhang, an exobiologist and exolinguist, was sent to the SCP-XXXX colony, arriving on ██/██/████. Three weeks later, Dr. Zhang sent an entire new database of anomalous items (currently classified as SCP-001-EU to SCP-████-EU), leading to the establishment of a permanent working space for her in the colony, now named Site Europa/Jupiter II.

Eight months later, Zhang requested Foundation approval for an interspecies marriage between her and an SCP-XXXX instance. Permission was granted under the condition of Dr. Zhang's regular reporting of her situation and all relevant data about the marriage in the form of an experiment log.

Footnotes

1. Indicated relative to the date of first contact.

2. Memetic activity suspected. Investigation pending.

The Noir Universe's Database

Forfeit notebooks from ████ ██████.

WORK IN PROGRESS

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Keter (Uncontained)

Special Containment Procedures: All forfeit items related to SCP-XXXX are to be stored in a collection of labeled cardboard boxes in Archive 6. The collective protocols for Archive 6 security personnel apply as usual. Unauthorized access to documents labeled as SCP-XXXX is punishable with up to three days of confinement and, depending on the severity of the case, administration of Class-A amnestics. Unauthorized access to objects labeled as SCP-XXXX is punishable with up to a month of confinement and administration of Class-A amnestics, with more severe punishments being possible at the discretion of Archive 6's Director in case of subtraction.

Description: SCP-XXXX is the denomination of an anomalous event occurred on ██/██ /20██ and the medium through which a confidentiality breach of Foundation’s internal data took place. At 17:58 of the aforementioned date, ███████ sensors in the Diablo Bay Hills registered six roughly simultaneous supersonic shockwaves in the area. No traces of explosive materials were found on the zone and no artificial structures or persons were present nearby. The resulting sound could be heard in a ██ kilometers radius from the point of origin and was immediately reported by the local news team as witnesses called to report. All witnesses have been made to believe that the event was the result of illegal dynamite mining by individuals unfamiliar with the proportions.

On what was thought to be an unrelated incident on ██/██ /20██, a collection of items was recovered from the house of ████ ██████ after agents of the Foundation were alerted of the activities of a public-access website operating under the name "SCP Leaks". While the vast majority of the files published by this website didn't match any actual SCP Foundation document, their use of confidential terminology and direct mentions of classified information was enough to warrant an emergency intervention. Several users and contributors of the website had their IP directions tracked by the Foundation and were subsequently administered Class-C amnestics. Upon arrival to the site administrator's home, ████ ██████ was found in possession of confidential information. He could not be interrogated, as he was accidentally killed during an attempted escape.

The following items were found in ██████'s bedroom:

A complete description of these items can be found in Addendum XXXX-1.

██████ was described by his neighbors as a "conspiracy theorist enthusiast". When interrogated about recent events, several individuals declared that ██████ had stopped going outside of his house after six individuals dressed in lab coats marked with a logo of "a circle with three arrows pointing inwards" appeared in the street "wandering, and as if they were confused about completely normal things", mainly, pieces of modern technology. Another neighbor claimed to have heard the voice of ██████ in an angry tone coming from inside the house on ██/██ /20██, complaining about people "thinking this is a joke". The six unidentified subjects were seen leaving ██████'s house on ██/██ /20██ and their whereabouts remain unknown ever since.

It is theorized that these individuals were, in fact, [DATA EXPUNGED]. An investigation is ongoing. All personnel in the Diablo Bay area must be specially attentive to act quickly in case of sighting of any suspicious individuals clad in Foundation's lab coats.

The Well on Felicity Farm

SCP-XXXX-1 in the well.

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be kept in its well. Attempted extraction of SCP-XXXX is punishable with up to a month of confinement and termination in the case of recidivism. Any accidental leak of SCP-XXXX is to be immediately reported and repaired. SCP-XXXX-1 is to be kept inside SCP-XXXX at all times. SCP-XXXX-2 and SCP-XXXX-3 have been neutralized.

Description: SCP-XXXX is the water of an old well located in the Felicity Farm, a small farmstead on the outskirts of Diablo Bay, ██. The suspicion of abnormality arose in the new owners of Felicity Farm when they started regularly hearing sounds coming from the well, that they initially ignored, attributing them to "a small animal, probably a frog" trapped in the water. This situation lasted for approximately two months and, during that time, SCP-XXXX was regularly used to water the adjacent fields and drank by ████ ██████, 26, female, resident in the farmstead.

SCP-XXXX-1 was discovered when ███ ██████, 28, husband of ████ ██████, called the police to report the presence of a young girl in the bottom of the well. Recordings of this telephonic call revealed that the creature, superficially resembling a woman of Asian descent with long, disheveled hair, was not anatomically human. According to ██████'s words, when he tried to lift SCP-XXXX-1 from the waters, he revealed a long, snake-like body covered in equally long and disheveled hair attached to SCP-XXXX-1's head. ██████'s voice indicated clear signs of distress during the call, and he expressed additional preoccupations about his wife, reporting severe weight loss and changes in personality. A police agent was sent to the zone, but never returned, attracting the Foundation's interest.

Agent Riley Preston was sent to investigate on ██/██/20██, losing contact at ██:██ hours. Preston's report of the days following this incident (leading to the classification of Mrs. ██████ as SCP-XXXX-2 and the field around the farmhouse as SCP-XXXX-3) can be read in Annex I.

Addendum: Investigation work done by agents of the Foundation revealed the last owner of the farm to be Cletus Pierleoni (now D-11235813), who, after being interrogated, confessed to having murdered his girlfriend and disposed of her body throwing it in the well. The method employed by Pierleoni was overdose of unidentified pills that he diluted in a glass of water and made his partner drink. The woman was already dead when thrown into the well. Following this confession, Pierleoni was unwillingly recruited as Class-D personnel and assigned to [DATA EXPUNGED].

The Well on Felicity Farm (tale)

WORK IN PROGRESS

+ Mission report by agent Preston (Day 1)

Day 1

I arrived at the secluded farm at ██:██ and parked my car next to the police car that was still there. The husband was at the door and appeared to be fine, although worried. He gestured at me to leave, but I approached him firmly.

"What have yo done? Now she's never gonna let you go, too…" he said.

He sounded devastated. I went into the house and he made me follow him to a room in the upper floor. The policeman was also there, safe and sound. He was sitting in the ground, with signs of having been crying recently, his clothes slightly damaged and a scratch in his chin. When I tried to inspect it, he flinched. I told him to trust me, but he told me that it would be hard for him to ever trust a woman again after what "she" had done to him. I asked who she was, but the husband answered in his place, saying it was his wife.

He told me it was the water. She drank it straight from the well, but not him. It was changing her. The more she drank, the worse she got. They warned me to not make her angry, to obey and to never try to leave the house. She was no longer human. I told them to wait there and as I was about to go back to my car to get my things when we heard a noise downstairs.

"Quick! She's coming!" they said.

Those were the tensest seconds of my life while I waited for the thing to come upstairs. Then she appeared in the threshold and I froze completely. She was unclothed. Her skin had turned dark grey and her body barely had any mass. Her face, exhibiting a disturbing expression, had mutated to grotesque proportions and her eyes reflected the light like those of night predators. But what was truly terrifying was the way she moved; it was uncanny, twitchy… Almost like the way people look like when moving around in a club with those blinking, intermittent lights, but with the strange poses of an undead monstrosity.

"Well, it looks like we have a guest" she smiled, while her husband and the police officer cowered in fear. Then she suddenly jumped at me, placing her twisted face at 15 centimeters of mine and quickly taking my gun in her hands. She smiled at me, declaring "No guns allowed in this house, honey…"

She took my weapon with her and announced that we would be having dinner in one hour. She was almost friendly the whole time, but in a disturbing way, looking like she could snap in any moment. And now I was defenseless against her. I tried to discuss a plan with her two hostages, but they were too scared to attempt anything. At ██:██, when went downstairs to have dinner.

We sat at the table with that thing… It was surrealistic. She served us some vegetables, and I flinched every time she was close to me and twitched. Otherwise, we also remained completely still and quiet. There was a glass of water for every one of us, but I could see the lips of Mr. ██████ silently articulating the command "Don't. Drink. The. Water." as the police officer stared at me nervously. It was too late.

"Drink a little water, love" said the creature.

"Uh… no, thanks, I'm not thirsty" I replied.

"Drink the water" she insisted, a bit less calmly. "Hydration is very import for your health."

"No, really, I don't want to…"

She stood up, frowning, and grabbed my glass, repeating one last time "drink the water" and then, with almost no time for a reaction on my part, she hold my nose with her fingers, forcefully threw my head back and started to dump the contents of the glass into my throat. I resisted for a little, but eventually gave up and had to chug the whole glass of water. I finished it and, as I was coughing, she smiled again, patted me in the back and said "that's better". I noticed the water left a faint white residue in the glass and assumed that powder was the source of Mrs. ██████'s mutation.

Later that night, we were sent to a bedroom upstairs and all locked there for the night. I made myself vomit the water by inserting my fingers in my throat. I fucking hate puking… Then I asked the others what was happening, what was in the water, and what did they know about the thing in the well, but they couldn't say much. We went to sleep. Or we tried.

+ Mission report by agent Preston (Day 2)

Day 2

That night, I decided to classify Mrs. ██████ as SCP-XXXX-2, but, when she unlocked the door, she was noticeably worse. Her mouth was at least a centimeter wider, her nose was slowly disappearing, her eyes where getting rounder, with more intense bags under them, and the messy, thick hair in her head (and in her vulva) was starting to fall down. Furthermore, her movements were getting noticeably more spasmodic.

She… Or, it… appeared at the door with a long strip of white silk in its hands. I think it wanted to make a hair bow for me, or something, but that was when the nightmare started. It smelled the vomit and turned to me, telling me that I was dirty and needed a shower. She lead me to the bathroom, forced me to undress and pushed me into the shower. I cleaned myself normally for a couple of minutes until it turned for a moment and I saw the opportunity to escape and I run towards the door… But it caught me and got really, really angry. It pushed me back into the shower and against the wall, grinning like a psychopath, and jumped to the wall, sticking to it like a spider.

"I try to be kind to you and you want to leave?" it angrily whispered to me. "Is this how you pay me!? I'll need to teach you a lesson!"

It then wrapped the strip of silk around my neck and, while firmly holding it with its hand, crawled up the wall and to the bathroom's corner. My feet lost contact with the ground and I couldn't breath no more. I kicked, I tried to get the piece of wet silk off my neck, but was unsuccessful. I was desperately trying to gasp for air. Nothing. I felt my face turning purple and my life leaving my body. I got numb, but I couldn't afford losing consciousness. I kicked and struggled until my muscles failed me. I peed myself. I blacked out. Then it released me and I started to breath again, crying and panting. It emitted a deranged laughter, looking at me from the ceiling, with it's head turned 180 degrees back.

"Let that be a kind reminder, honey" it said, crawling towards the door. "Now dress yourself and go back to your room."

It kept us locked up in that room like livestock, only letting us out to feed us and, a couple of times, dragging the males to somewhere else, from where they returned looking devastated, with the thousand-yard stare in their eyes. I had to drink more of that nightmarish water that evening, but I was too afraid to force myself to vomit it again. At least I got away drinking the minimum possible. The less water we drank, the longer we would resist without becoming monsters.

I couldn't sleep that night.

+ Mission report by agent Preston (Day 3)

Day 3

I could see it near the well, getting water, and then, using it to irrigate the field around the house. The grass was very tall, reaching up to her knees, and looked unkept. I could only imagine what effect would SCP-XXXX have on it. I used the time it was outside the house to look for possible weapons or something useful for my escape, but I remained paranoid for the whole time, always feeling its presence behind me, crawling on the walls, even if I knew she wasn't there. My only hope was to resist long enough for the Foundation to send reinforcements to investigate my disappearance… or to kill the thing myself.

+ Mission report by agent Preston (Day 5)

Day 5

It's been four days now. Strange ideas cross my mind. I think it's the water, but at least I'm doing better than the husband and the cop. They're starting to get that weird glow in their eyes. Subtle, but it's there. Last day, SCP-XXXX-2 got angry at me for having slept too little. It accused me of having spent the night having sex with "its men", called me a slut, a cocksucker, and forced a broomstick down my throat until I threw up. It still hurts. But the most disturbing part was that, by now, it pretty much has a permanent smile in its deformed face. Its belly has also swollen, as if it were a small organic balloon full of liquid. That's when I decided I've had enough.

As soon as I saw it going to the well, I kicked the door down, went downstairs, armed myself with a kitchen knife and opened the main door. I didn't care if I died. That's when I saw them coming, just in time: the cavalry had arrived. That point was also when the massacre started.

Some went straight through the grass an quickly disappeared into it. I couldn't see it clearly, but I would have swore that something very similar to human hands reached from below and dragged them down under the ground, never to be seen again. Some stood there looking around until SCP-XXXX-2 came to dispatch them. One poor Class-D got the worst part as he was the last man standing. It jumped on him, knocking him down and proceeded to [REMOVED]. I don't even know how it achieved to get an erection from him, but, when it was done with him, I was pretty sure that he had a broken hipbone. Not that it mattered, since it crushed his skull with a rock afterwards.

I got enough time to grab a gun from one of the dead agents before it turned to me. I ran inside as it chased me with surprising agility and barely made it to the basement, where I hid behind a large storage shelf. I didn't even notice the egg clusters attached to the walls, like giant spider sacs the size of small watermelons. It crossed the dock looking around, grinning and laughing uncontrollably as it crawled on the ceiling. In the darkness of the basement, its eyes glowed horrendously.

I believe it thought I had escaped or something at some point, because she descended the wall, stayed still for a moment and then started to lay more eggs. Sticky, silky, pulsating eggs… That's when I saw my opportunity and took it. Two shots, a screeching cry and the thing was dead with its brain splattered on the ground. Even in death, it still had its face paralyzed in that psychopathic, smiling face. A brief look at the eggs revealed that they were full of "snake-babies".

I burnt the whole thing down. The eggs, the corpse, the field. Everything. Those creatures where too nightmarish to be allowed to exist. I don't care what you guys say. It had to be destroyed. So, I got Mr. ██████ and the policeman out, soaked the place in gasoline and revoked its existence rights. The grass shrieked harder than the egg sacs. Then I went to the well, and I would have killed SCP-XXXX-1 too if it didn't stood there motionless, staring at me with no expression at all. No anger, no fear, no sadness. Just staring. It was like a dead puppet, an empty shell being controlled by an invisible hand inside it. I doubted. It didn't look evil. In fact, it hadn't done anything to anyone by itself. I put the gun down and it returned carefreely to the deep waters it came from. I went to my car, grabbed my phone and called the Foundation to send someone to fetch me a couple of Class-D Amnestics and body bags.

Then, I sat to admire the fireworks.