fletchposts’ Sandbox

SCP CONCEPT FOR REVIEW: "SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED CIVILIZATION"

Hi all! I've been reading for a long time, but this is my first SCP. My horror writing experience is limited, so I've tried to play to my strengths by keeping this light, unambitious and comedy oriented.

Questions I have for you:

  • Does the anomaly (and the Foundation's response) makes sense?
  • This draft got longer after greenlighting because people had a lot of unanswered questions about the anomaly. Does the level of detail help your suspension of disbelief, or do you get bored halfway through?
  • Is this funny—without feeling too lolFoundation?

Thanks!

rating: 0+x

Item #: SCP-4XXX

Object Class: Euclid (pending review)

Special Containment Procedures:
Ryan Hornsberger, of Bound Brook, NJ, is to be prevented from engaging in sexual intercourse (hereafter a “Bootknock Event”) by any means necessary.

MTF Iota-2 (“Knock Blockers”) is tasked with prevention and response to individual Bootknock Events. If a Bootknock Event is imminent, Hornsberger is to be detained for a 24-hour period of study, followed by amnesticization and release. If a Bootknock Event is imminent, nearby Iota-2 agents are to interfere with Hornsberger's prospective partner by any means deemed appropriate by the MTF Commander. Iota-2 agents are forbidden from detaining, engaging, or interfering with Hornsberger himself.

If a Bootknock Event is executed, or if either Hornsberger or SCP-4XXX becomes aware that Bootknock Events are being intentionally impeded by Iota-2 or by another party, a member of the O5 Council is to be alerted immediately and SCP-4XXX is to be formally upgraded to Keter.

Diplomatic summits with SCP-4XXX are to take place on the first Thursday of every month. Radio jammers are to be erected around the town of Bound Brook to block all communications on frequencies known to be used by SCP-4XXX. Cover Story 1779 "Prank Call" is to be used whenever a civilian reports receiving any communication from entities calling themselves "Testicle".

Description:
SCP-4XXX is a microscopic civilization that evolved by anomalous means inside New Jersey resident Ryan Hornsberger's right testicle.

SCP-4XXX is likely related to the nonanomalous bacteria Neisseria gonorrhoeae1. Researcher Z. Bentley hypothesizes that SCP-4XXX's size allows it to manipulate objects at the molecular level, surpassing the Foundation's own understanding of nanotechnology by an estimated ███ years. Observation SCP-4XXX supports this hypothesis. SCP-4XXX has demonstrated technical capabilities on par with a civilization equivalent or superior to our own. SCP-4XXX nanotech allows it to observe its surroundings to a relatively advanced degree, communicate with Foundation sites (and potentially other parties) via radio wave, and deploy weapons that are not yet understood by Foundation or civilian science.

SCP-4XXX is not dissimilar from a common sexually transmitted infection apart from its anomalous intelligence. Non-invasive scanning on Hornsberger indicates that long term SCP-4XXX infestation significantly damages the human body in the manner of a conventional disease, causing any number of medical complications from weakened immune system to significantly shortened lifespan.

Due the fastidious2 nature of the gonorrhea bacterium, SCP-4XXX is currently confined to Hornsberger's testicle. Knowing they cannot survive outside the testicle, SCP-4XXX does not exit Hornsberger's body during his day to day activities.3 However, if their signaling systems detect a possible point of entry into another human being (i.e. a Bootknock Event), SCP-4XXX will immediately attempt to infect that subject. Due to the highly contagious nature of nonanomalous gonorrhea, this is to be considered a containment breach.

Projections indicate that SCP-4XXX civilization will advance exponentially with each new human colonized, giving them access to more nutrients, more sexual partners, etc. It is unknown whether a sufficiently advanced form of SCP-4XXX would be able to establish itself outside of a host. If SCP-4XXX hosts engage in sexual intercourse at the same frequency as the uninfected population, it is expected that SCP-4XXX will outpace human civilization by early 202█, resulting in a SK-Class Dominance Shift scenario.

While in contact with SCP-4XXX, researchers are to refer to it by its self-determined English name, "Testicle," for diplomatic purposes.