4997

HYPERREAL INTER-LINEAR DATABASE AUDITOR (HILDA)
Displaying result for SCP-4997 on 22/03/2016 at 0300 hrs

All access to HILDA is jointly tracked by the Overseer Council and the Pataphysics Department.
Unauthorised access is grounds for immediate termination.

Slide 1

Slide 1 of 12

(Distribute supplementary document to Ms. Raj/classmates before starting)

SILAS: Good morning Ms. Raj and fellow classmates, he's Paul -

PAUL: - and I'm Paul -

SILAS: and we'll now be presenting our literature coursework on our chosen prompt, namely, A Literary Frankenstein! That's right, today we're donning the laboratory coats so you lovely people can watch us disassemble, analyse, and bastardise -

PAUL: (sternly) Synthesise.

SILAS: Yes - synthesise - two completely unrelated fictional works! Namely, Richard Adams' fantasy rabbit adventure Watership Down…

PAUL: …and the online collaborative fiction platform, The SCP Foundation! Which makes the coats somewhat topical, as you'll see later.

SILAS: (giving an approving shoulder-smack) Touché, Theophilus, didn't even realise. But anyway! Why this diabolical experiment, you might be wondering? What might we hope to accomplish through such galling malpractice?

PAUL: Well, simple. We want to use everybody's favourite rabbits to induct you all to the wondrous mystery that is collaborative fiction. Ah, writing stuff together: a simple idea with endless artistic potential and the ability to, well, save your life.

SILAS: So without further ado, let's begin!

Slide 2

Slide 2 of 12

SILAS: Hazel and his fellow rabbits have just finished digging their brand-new warren, the Honeycomb. But don't be deceived: there's nothing sweet about their situation, and the atmosphere is fraught with worry. The Owsla, the head honchos, are having a frantic gathering in the central chamber. And by that I mean everyone, because they're all family to Hazel. Good guy Hazel!

PAUL: Trouble is, these rabbits have seen a terrible thing on their travels, and nobody can agree what they've been through. They're all just yapping over one another. Where's this warren and why is it so nasty? Does it have a literal roof of bones? Hold on, who's this shady Cowslip figure? What on earth is a scut?

SILAS: It's a rabbit's tail.

PAUL: Oh.

Slide 3

Slide 3 of 12

(Both don bunny ears.)

SILAS, as DANDELION: (breathlessly, miming impassioned argument) yeah but you see clearly Cowslip deserves to die they have grown fat and languid why you no listen to me I'm totally not going back there it was bigger than a breadbox

PAUL, as HAZEL: (pointing accusingly) OBJECTION!

(Dandelion hangs his head contritely and with an exaggerated ear-flop.)

HAZEL: Good Frith, surely nothing will come from this swollen morass of half-truths! We shall sooner expire from your squabbling than from the creatures of the field. Could we all take a moment to compose ourselves?

(Silence.)

HAZEL: Dandelion!

DANDELION: (with servility soon tempered by concern): Oh! Me! …Yes, Hazel?

HAZEL: Dandelion, you have always been an eloquent and faithful chronicler. Clearly, we have met an unspeakable evil, and woe befall us if we fail to set the record straight. So have I prepared you an assignment, that we might reckon with our frightful encounter. Our race is cunning and full of tricks; we ought to know and confront our devourers.

DANDELION: Wow Hazel, that's deep.

(Silence.)

DANDELION: Aye aye.

(Silas mimes the process of writing, seemingly engrossed in some creative endeavour. Paul removes the bunny ears.)

PAUL: What exactly did Hazel ask Dandelion to do? Well, whatever it is, we can be sure of one thing -

(Silas reaches under the presenters' desk and produces a piece of paper signifying the completed work.)

PAUL and SILAS (in unison): Precise description saves lives.

Sent: Tuesday, 8 April 2014, 10:23 PM
From: Silas Teo <moc.liamg|99aelfgnipmuj#moc.liamg|99aelfgnipmuj>
To: Priscilla Raj <ude.nywrve|1jarallicsirp#ude.nywrve|1jarallicsirp>
Cc: Paul Theophilus Lee <moc.liamg|syawlaLTP#moc.liamg|syawlaLTP>
Subject: Year 3 Lit Coursework - Supplementary Document and Rationales

Hi Mdm,

Paul and I are so glad you liked our presentation! Please find attached our supplementary document, which you very enthusiastically requested in soft copy. :)

To be honest, we were reluctant to share our inspiration for this topic with you. It is grounded in some unsavoury observations about… a certain extracurricular from our beloved Institution. But we eventually relented, because we know you are an ardent, truth-seeking Wayfarer, and you have always told us that brutal honesty is important when love demands it.

The two of us are now holding ourselves to those words. We've interspersed the document with three "rationales" that embody the themes of our presentation, and we'll leave it to you to read between the lines yourself. Owing to their sensitive contents, we implore you not to share these with our fellow students or the other teachers.

Thank you so much for your kind understanding, Ms Raj.

Blessings,
Silas

ATTACHMENTS (1):
SCP-4997 - They Know Not Frith.pdf

---

Item #: SCP-4997

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: Subsequent contact with SCP-4997 and its inhabitants is to be minimised, if not wholly avoided. Honeycomb rabbits are to abstain from venturing into the surrounding farmland barring extreme exigencies. On-duty watchrabbits are to watch for SCP-4997 activity in the vicinity of the Honeycomb as part of their routine duty.

Insofar as resources allow, any encountered escapees of SCP-4997 may be granted refuge in the Honeycomb upon request.

Description: SCP-4997 is a large, densely inhabited underground warren of leporine origin. SCP-4997 adjoins a man-made farmstead situated near the midpoint of the Honeycomb and the former site of Sandleford Warren. However, its precise location is yet to be identified or spatially represented.

SCP-4997 is fronted by a physically robust rabbit identifying as Cowslip (hereafter RoI-4997-1), operational leader and chief emissary of SCP-4997 and its inhabitants. RoI-4997-1 offers permanent residency to any nomadic rabbit colonies he encounters. Parties who accept RoI-4997-1's invitation are then cordially escorted to SCP-4997, and undergo one-on-one introductory tours.

The inhabitants of SCP-4997, while biologically non-anomalous, exhibit an average physical stature and agility far exceeding subjective generalisations for similarly-encountered warrens in comparable habitats. Rabbits who have encountered SCP-4997 frequently allude to the high quality of life and abundance of daily provisions, but note that the hospitality offered to non-native inhabitants bears an artificial, ingratiating quality. Others perceive vacuous, unquestioning behaviour on the part of SCP-4997's residents, fearing that said behaviour portends a malicious ulterior motive, or willful corporate ignorance of some established fact. Evidence adduced to justify this concern usually includes reports of SCP-4997's residents blithely ignoring, interrupting, or otherwise derailing questions of location, regardless of context or subject.

SCP-4997-1 is a group of small, regularly-spaced stones, mounted on a man-made wall shaft located at the terminus of one of SCP-4997's tunnels. Tour guides enlisted by RoI-4997 invariably explain to newcomers that SCP-4997-1 is a monument constructed by the forebears of SCP-4997's present residents, and constitute a crude tableaux of the leporine legend, "El-ahrairah Steals the King's Lettuce". However, Honeycomb analysts were unable to discern any recognised pattern or mythological significance in the placement of SCP-4997-1's component stones. It has been concluded that SCP-4997-1 bears no or negligible fidelity to any extant legend within the leporine canon.

RATIONALE #1

The Spirebourne Sentinels
Leadership Development Camp 2013: Cohort Games
Saturday, 1 June 2013
Administrative Instructions

---

Icebreakers

[DOCUMENT TRUNCATED]

Name of activity: Double whacko
Venue: The Launchpad

Logistics:

• 1 x crude bludgeon (scrunched-up newspaper)

Gameplay: Cohort to split into reasonably-sized groups. Each group splits forms two concentric circles by splitting into pairs, with a whacker or "monkey" taking position in the circles' centre. To progress the game, a Sentinel in the outer circle calls the name of a Sentinel in the inner circle (other than their partner). The monkey then attempts to whack the named Sentinel. To save them, their outer-circle proxy must call another name from the inner circle. The cycle repeats until someone has been successfully whacked, whereupon they become the new monkey.

Rationale: The superficial purpose of the game is to encourage familiarity with each other's names. However, since the fates of inner-circle members are entirely contingent on their outer-circle counterparts, the game reinforces that Sentinels are mutually accountable for one another's actions and/or deficiencies. During debrief, the inner circle's vulnerability and representative function may be used to illustrate penal substitutionary atonement.

---

The Loft of Supplication by daylight.

Scavenger Hunt

[DOCUMENT TRUNCATED]

Name of activity: Post tenebras lux (Station #5)
Venue: Loft of Supplication

Logistics:

• 4 x classroom chair
• 2 x classroom desk
• 1 x exercise ball
• 1 x water trough
• 3 x bath bomb
• 3 x rubber ducks
• 9 x laminated puzzle pieces

Gameplay: The stairwell leading to the Loft of Supplication is to be furnished with obstacles, viz. assorted classroom furniture, and the lights turned off. Team members will ascend the stairwell one at a time, negotiating said obstacles, with the aim of retrieving from the Loft one of nine laminated puzzle pieces submersed in a trough filled with bath-bombed water. To create atmosphere, two Senior Patrol Leaders in plain black T-shirts are to stand phlegmatically along the course and vocalise creepily when a team member approaches. The Station Master convenes the team once all nine objectives have been retrieved, revealing through assembly that the puzzle pieces form a depiction of the Great Benefactor. They are then rewarded with their next clue.

Rationale: The macabre, brooding atmosphere of the station, together with the requirement to sift through clouded water, accords with the "Through a Glass Darkly" theme of the scavenger hunt. Hearkening to the Scriptural context of that theme, the Wayfaring imagery formed by the laminated pieces presents Sentinels with a sober, hopeful view of Celestium at the end of their dark, perilous pilgrimage.

N.B. Due to the presence of the exercise ball, this station is classified as moderate-risk.

SCP-4997-2 is a proximity-based phenomenon whereby rabbits possessing prophetic or clairvoyant abilities perceive osteal protuberances embedded in the ceiling of SCP-4997's central hall where, to unaffected observers, only tree roots are visible. Affected rabbits generally flee from SCP-4997 and subsequently refuse to proceed beyond SCP-4997's antechamber, citing an incipient threat to life and a generalised social malaise within SCP-4997. Additionally, affecteds tend to display an overwhelming empathic response to SCP-4997's designated poets and scribes whom they perceive to be stifled creatives grappling with spiritual repression, and the guilt of being complicit in a morbid conspiracy.

It remains uncertain whether SCP-4997-2 arises from a cognitohazard that selectively targets seers, or is simply a sequela of affected rabbits' innate abilities.

RATIONALE #2

Silas

No you idiot, just because I wasn't trudging away in the mud doesn't mean it was easy, you can take that notion and shove it up your ass sorry

I wish we need not discuss such things. I know you dislike sobriety when you can avoid it, and well, that's you and me both. We were made for mellower pastures. But you know how you approached me after this morning's frankly harrowing fieldcraft session, with your haggard frame and soiled fatigues, and you ribbed me, and you said "WOW the photographer orderly has it easy, right?" Do you know that that was hardly me?

At great risk of historical impiety, I assert that I was momentarily a kind of… Wilhelm Brasse. You know, the Auschwitz photographer? We were talking about him the other day. I know how disrespectful that sounds, and heck if you're not going to upbraid me for it. But it does something to you, Silas, when you see poor Antony trip over the mallet and abrase himself, and Instructor Jonah just kind of stands there going "is nobody going to help him up?", and then they all grunt and think to themselves, we aren't gonna pitch the tents in time - oh what a shame we’ve already had three time extensions, self-interested parochial di pricks they all are -

Gosh Silas, it's like you see fifty immortal, precious souls on the precipice of eternity, and here they are being nonchalantly sifted, and all you can fuc do is take pictures. Take pictures as beauty turns to ashes, as Mengele sews their veins together and mangles their intricate frames, in service of some grand celestial vision. Speaking of which, what the hel _^^{shucks I'm so sorry, topical in the worst way} is the point of witnessing this vanity every week and then going to the auditorium to sing "where strivings cease" week after week and pretending to mean it? This kind of shit doesn't go down in a Tabernaculum, right?

Please Silas, there's no need to tell me how there's not really historical equivalence and that was really unnecessary. But there's something real squamous about the whole thing, I tell you. Ugh. Thanks for letting me vent, I'll be better soon. And thanks for helping Antony. I shot that real good. You're my hero.

Paul

Paul, I get that this might be a devious thing, but come on. I expect better from you, because I love you, and I know you are better. Being a WWII buff with a Wayfaring worldview carries a mantle to steward your knowledge properly and you know it. I'm willing to discuss this issue more, but this one is too far.

PM me after LDC ends okay?

Silas

Addendum 4997.1: Incident Log

Two days after the Honeycomb's present inhabitants first sheltered in SCP-4997, brawler Bigwig was caught in a snare believed to have been emplaced by the neighbouring farmer. While the now-Honeycomb rabbits were eventually successful in rescuing Bigwig, it was noted that RoI-4997-1 and the other inhabitants of SCP-4997 showed agitated contempt towards their pleas for help. This engendered their flight from SCP-4997, leading to the establishment of the present-day Honeycomb.

Regarding this incident, Researcher Dandelion has consulted Brother Fiver, a clairvoyant Honeycomb rabbit who expressed serious initial reservations about settling in SCP-4997. Brother Fiver proposed that most of SCP-4997's inhabitants consider the subject of the farmer taboo, hoping to increase their chances of survival at the expense of the unknowing minority. Moreover, the existential stability achieved by this deception has eroded their survival instinct and mythological knowledge, with RoI-4997-1 reportedly boasting that "[they] do not tell the old stories much."

RATIONALE #3

11/2013 Instructors Council: Cohort Promotion
Note on Onesimus Phua

To all 2/2013 Instructors,

Particularly to those drafting the 3/2014 Autonomous Cohort Structure: kindly note that Onesimus Phua (Class 2M) did not meet the minimum academic threshold to be eligible for any leadership positions or key appointments next year. Regrettably, he is the only Sentinel in the cohort to have incurred this ignominy.

Scan of year-end results transcript as follows -

Ev'rwyn Spire
Final Report: Academic Year 2013

Name of Pupil: Onesimus Phua
Class: 2M (Mr Philemon Goh)
Extracurriculars: Spirebourne Sentinels (Uniformed) / Wayfarers' Tavern (Clubs and Societies)
Transcript Generated: 16 November 2013

Subject	First Semester	Second Semester	Overall Grade
Literature	94	89	92 (A+)
History	75	80	78 (A)
Mathematics	47	71	59 (C)
Biology	63	87	75 (A)
Chemistry	60	74	67 (B)
Physical Education	N/A	N/A	Poor (D)
Wayfaring Studies Elective	94	99	97 (A+)
Commserv*	Negligible	Negligible	- (E)

*Assessment is conducted qualitatively by contacting mentors from the student's chosen extracurricular(s), and stakeholders from pertinent volunteer work organisations across the Bastion.

Teacher's Remarks: Onesimus is an unassuming and cogent pupil who displays literary maturity and theological insight well beyond his years. However, his reticence in group settings, coupled with his poor physique and psychomotor skills, casts doubt on his ability to translate abstract thinking into practical reality. His mentors from the SS have surfaced that he tends towards pomposity while shying away from volunteer work, being - to put it crudely - "all head knowledge, no heart knowledge". Ev'rwyn Spire prides itself in producing globally-minded citizens who fear the Great Benefactor and apprehend that actions speak louder than words. It is hoped that Onesimus will improve and avail himself more readily next year.

Given the Institutional mandate that academics take precedence over extracurriculars, Onesimus' involvement in voluntary SS activities is to be restricted. This applies to squad outings, post-parade luncheon and soccer, supplementary badgework classes, and Friday night Scripture studies. Math of all things might seem like a trivial reason, but rules are rules.

Note that Onesimus, though he lacks any marketable skills, often asks unwieldy theological questions during our Friday night sessions that confuse the group and undermine its cohesion. No loss to axe him; we can care about the rest of the Scripture study group since they're more concerned about unity and putting others' needs first. They're the ones with Instructor potential and most have expressed interest in returning as alumni.

Let this be an object lesson. We all know the cutthroat realities of life in the Bastion and in this unnavigably complex world. Wayfarers stand on a timeless foundation and an eternal hope; as the world changes, they must adapt. No point if you can prophesy like Elijah but are too feeble to shout it from the hilltops.

In His Service,
Chief Instructor Jarvis

Slide 12

Slide 12 of 12

And so it came to pass, that guided by their new knowledge and by the providence of Frith, these rabbits came to live another day, and SCP-4997 did not have dominion over them.

If you are not the author and you want to rewrite this article, you may reply to this post asking for the opportunity to do so. Please obtain permission from the author.