- We'll Make Great Pets
- Fear eating Bacterium
- Waves of Depression
- Window to the Soul
- Private Etiquette Lessons
- Centennial Bulb
Item #: SCP-5XXX
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5XXX can be kept safely in standard grade minimum security quarters. SCP-5XXX is allowed free access to library materials, drafting and writing materials and is allowed the standard class C meal complement. Consultation with SCP-5XXX is restricted to staff members with specific clearances or with direct permission from Dr. Fischer. Requests for stellar cartography or specialized technical papers are to be granted but noted in in the containment log. Fraternization with SCP-5XXX is restricted to specific posted hours or by personnel directly consulting on approved projects.
Updated Containment Procedures. SCP-5XXX is to be kept in a medium security quarters. Requests for library materials are to be denied without review. Copies of engineering schematics and design proposals ready for administrative approval are to be provided daily. SCP-5XXX is allowed class E food mammalian dietary pellet supplement only upon completion of technical proofread. Staff members are not allowed physical contact with SCP-5XXX. Consultation with SCP-5XXX is limited to projects approved by Dr. Saito and are not to be conducted without Dr. Saito or a member of Dr. Saito's personal staff present.
Description: SCP-5XXX is a four armed mammalian humanoid of approximately 6 meters in height, with uniformly gray pigmentation, black sclera and pupils. Voluntary medical examination of SCP-5XXX reveals a remarkedly similar anatomy to human beings, with the exception of cranial structures and an overall bone density requisite to support the weight of SCPs extreme height.
SCP-5XXX came under Foundation control in 1972. Foundation cult activity monitors, investigating reports of a "giant" living within a new age commune in a remote section of Alaska, retrieved SCP-5XXX without resistance. SCP-5XXX spoke fluent english and by accounts been living within the commune for nearly a decade. Community members under interrogation described SCP-5XXX as a valued spiritual advisor and viewed its presence on Earth as the foundation for a pacifistic agrarian utopia.
By SCP-5XXX's own telling it is an extraterrestrial being, from a distant star system not charted or matching any current astronomical records. SCP-5XXX claims that an error in its' craft's automated guidance system caused the ship to leave the Sol star system while SCP-5XXX was on Earth's surface.
**Interview logs. Collected excerpts pertaining to general disposition of SCP-5XXX.
1975:**
Alright, okay, here's one- Why didn't anyone like the hotdogs 682 took to the cookout? They were… disgusting. (laughter)
Okay. Let me find my papers here. We were discussing D-class rotations. I've drawn several diagrams here, but let me preface them by saying that my proposed system makes allowances for your supply side issues. This is going to sound radical, but you can retain a certain level of institutional memory within the D-class if you cultivate the right kind of internal hierarchies within their population. Let them police themselves. I'm not saying they stop being prisoners, but the premise is this: allow them a narrow spectrum of autonomy, but let the autonomy within that spectrum be as complete as possible, and you'll see stress levels, cooperation and effectiveness skyrocket. All manner of bad things happen that will sour your test results when your subjects are stressed- lactic acid buildup in the muscular system, short term memory blackouts, damage to the hippocampus and the median frontal lobe. I've laid it all out here, and for my own edification-amusement I'm including a fantasy version in which you somehow went back in time and implemented my last series of suggestions. Just wanted to rub your nose in it a bit, as recent events continue to prove me your most valuable staff member. (laughter)
Why bother with prisoners? I’m not saying you should be calling for volunteers, but consider better sources of talent- capture skilled laborers from high mortality occupations. Cave divers, forest firefighters, whalers, things of that nature.
Dr. Fischer: I think Foundation staff would be uncomfortable with the idea. I would be too.
Think it through. Naturally braver stock. Wouldn't be missed.
Dr. Fischer: They haven't done anything to deserve the dangers inherent in this work.
Neither have you.
Dr. Fischer: What do you mean?
You've been compelled here just the same way. Maybe not forced at gunpoint, but it weighs the same in the end, doesn't it?
Dr. Fischer: I really don't follow. I'm not being forced to be here.
No, you were seduced into it gradually. It's important to you. You couldn't quit.
Dr. Fischer: It's important to the entire world. I'm not even allowed to describe how important it is, but often our entire world is hanging by a thread.
And it'd be a terrible man who didn't hold onto that thread, right?
Dr. Fischer: Sure.
And gun to your head or not, you'd continue to hold that thread.
Dr. Fischer: Of course.
And that terrible man, you'd hold a gun on him, right?
Dr. Fischer: If I couldn't hold the thread, sure.
That's something I admire about you. Your kind is a working breed.
Post ship discovery interviews:
Are we in lockdown? What breached? It's [REDACTED] isnt it? I told-
Dr. Fischer: We found what's left of your ship.
Ah. This is unpleasant. I'm very sorry, Stephen.
Dr. Fischer: We have discovered genetic material that matches our own. In the waste repository. We know what the seats are made of. You've been lying to me. For decades.
There is no need to be upset. You're a rational man, control yourself. What I’m about to explain to you will be painful and you will initially reject it. May I have my drafting supplies?
Dr. Fischer: No.
Well, imagine I’ve drawn a circle with the word “grub” written in the center. Surround that circle with another that says “chicken”. And another with the word “human”. And another circle, encompassing all the others, with my scp designation as it’s label.
Dr. Fischer: And surrounding yours?
There are no larger circles. I suppose you'd think it would be poetic justice if there were? You don’t see the irony of that sentiment?
I’m not making an appeal to you. You are not capable of viewing this situation objectively. Sit down. My worth to your superiors supersedes yours, as does my contributions.
Dr. Fischer: If you can't tell the difference between a chicken and a human, maybe you aren't as intelligent as you're always claiming to be.
No I don’t see the difference. There is no difference. This is the part of our conversation that will be painful for you. I have more respect for the chicken. Yes. Humans are more emotionally delicate, with a piecemeal rationality. Hypocrisies that have to be tended and maintained. You claim sentience as your own, a dividing line between yourself and lesser beings, but no such line exists. There is no effective difference between the consciousness of a mealworm and the consciousness of a human. The dividing line to which you ascribe all differences is simply the capacity for a species to communicate with humans. The image of cruelty or mercy to a human is simply predicated on how closely the affected life form resembles you. Unsurprisingly you have no word for this. I would call it a sapio-normative thought prison.
I have a brain with 12 hemispheres. I see colors you are not capable of imagining. I do not age, and We are communicating now, in your language, but you could only understand very simple parts of words in my natural language. You are dimly aware of your own situation, and make these small forays into understanding, but hit a wall every time. To put it simply, you aren’t capable of love.
Dr. Fischer: let me get this straight, you eat thinking, speaking beings and we’re the ones incapable of love?
Yes. I preached love for many years in the forest but even then I had my suspicions it was beyond your capabilities. Love is the foundation of my society. My people are not immortal, but we do not age, and we do not forget. Your lives are short and your memory is limited. You are capable of affection but loyalty is impossible for beings as ephemeral as you.
We try not to get too attached to humans, in good care they do not last long, so a certain amount of our emotional detachment is for our own protection. I am unusually fond of humans, which is why I self selected for the journey here. You don’t feel pain that we do, and how could you? I have perfect recall of all the memories of a long life.
For what it's worth, it's the whole reason we like your kind. You try very hard, and it makes you loveable, and funny.
Yes, love. Or familiarity, care, attachment, take your pick. I wouldn't use the word "pet". Think of it more like the Portuguese term for a household pet, animal de estimação.
Log 3: Interrogation, drugged
Dr. Saito: Please concentrate.
Growing-nothing-void…
Dr. Saito: We need your cooperation on another matter. We have decrypted another section of your personal data storage device, and we have questions about the audiovisual records. Your people repeat a specific sound at humans in your captivity. What is the significance of that sound?
Well…. ….here you tell your children… cats say “meow” But on the other side of this planet they say cats say “maomao”.
Well… if Old Macdonald had a farm on my planet, that’s the sound humans make. Nononono…






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