HelloItsRichard
rating: 0+x

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Classes:

  • SCP-XXXX-A is Euclid
  • SCP-XXXX-B is Safe
  • SCP-XXXX-C is Safe

Special Containment Procedures: Both SCP-XXXX-A and SCP-XXXX-B are held within a standard humanoid containment cell. SCP-XXXX-A must wear a full mouth cover to prevent speech at all times unless authorized for testing. If needed, SCP-XXXX-A will be provided a cell phone for communication. SCP-XXXX-C is held in [REDACTED].

Description: SCP-XXXX is a collective term of three linked anomalous objects:

SCP-XXXX-A is a teenage male with a height of 1.8 meters and a weight of 135kg, and was born ██/██/2003 This child has the ability to annoy another its victim to the point of insanity. Any person hearing SCP-XXXX-A's voice will become agitated, annoyed, and extremely stressed, eventually lead to insanity. This effect is reversible via psychological counseling and therapy, up until a certain point. If a victim listens to SCP-XXXX-A's voice for more than 1 hour, they will become completely mentally broken, showing symptoms of schizophrenia.

SCP-XXXX-B is a bag of wholesale-size █&█ Pure Cane Sugar, labeled for sale in Sun Valley, California. The sugar within the bag causes immediate death to any person who consumes any amount of sugar. The cause of death varies, but usually is a result of lethal levels of blood sugar, stroke, heart attack, or liver failure. The only exception to this effect is SCP-XXXX-A, who shows no difference in behavior or health when consumed. SCP-XXXX-A has described this bag being the source of their anomalous properties.

SCP-XXXX-C is a photograph of SCP-XXXX-A holding SCP-XXXX-B in its arms, located in a produce shop in Sun Valley, California. Anyone who looks at the photo immediately dies by unknown means. Ń̶̙o̶͚̕ ̴̮̍o̶̡͐t̶̫͋h̴̛͖ḙ̴̓r̷̢̀ ̴̼̑i̷̻͊n̸̢̄f̴̮̀ö̷́͜r̵̡͗m̴̻̀a̴̘̐ṯ̶̒i̶̡̎ǫ̸͆ṉ̸̎ ̴̗͆ȋ̴̩s̸̪̍ ̴̰͊a̷͚͐v̶̫̌a̴͕̎i̶̜͆l̷͔̽ả̶̖b̵̬́l̶̡̿ë̵́͜ ̴̩̈́à̷͚t̶̹͐ ̶͓̓t̸̢́h̸̪̉i̵̹̔s̵̀͜ ̶̣̾t̶̟͠ï̸̜m̵̞̃e̴̘̊.̷̻͌

Interviewed: SCP-XXXX-A

Interviewer: Dr. ████

Foreword: SCP-XXXX-A was removed from containment on ██/██/████ for an interview with Dr. ████. Note that all dialogue spoken by XXXX-A is communicated via text to speech on a cell phone texting application, as to not harm Dr. ████.

<Begin Log, 05:37>

Dr. ████: Good morning, XXXX.
XXXX-A: >uhhhhh….. yeah richie is fine lol
Dr. ████: We'd like to ask you some questions regarding your anomalous properties.
XXXX-A: >sure go ahead 😅
Dr. ████: Can you describe how you discovered these abilities?
XXXX-A: >so like in 20██ my friends went to this produce in sun valley and took a pic of me w/ a bag of sugar. and uhhh i bought it and ate some, and then when i talked everyone got really annoyed (((lol)))
Dr. ████: I see. You are aware your voice can cause mental trauma, correct?
XXXX-A: >yeah i know, thats why i have this [REDACTED] on my face lmao
Dr. ████: Alright. Can you explain the cognitohazardous properties of SCP-XXXX-C?
XXXX-A: >???????
Dr. ████: Anyone who looks at it dies instantly.
XXXX-A: (SCP-XXXX-A appears visibly confused.)

<End Log, 05:49>

Closing Statement: SCP-XXXX-A was placed back into containment along with SCP-XXXX-B.