Exploration XXXX Video Log Transcript
Date: April 7, 20██
Exploration Team: TMTF-Ψ16 (Temporary Mobile Task Force-Psi Sixteen)
Subject: SCP-XXXX-A
Team Lead: Agent K. Demetrius
Team Members: Agent L. Deneslovski [Communications], Agent P. Tulmutt [Diplomacy], Agent R. Uusbekas [General Defense], Agent M. Molvado [Political Science]
Procedure: TMTF-Ψ16 was shuttled via discrete armored transport to the time and place specified by SCP-XXXX.
[BEGIN LOG]
The camera feed turns on, revealing TMTF-Ψ16, all dressed in black suits and ties, wearing a Foundation insignia pin.
Demetrius: So, let's go over the protocols, alright people?
Everyone: Yes, commander.
Demetrius: Good, so, Deneslovski, what is the first thing we do when we get there?
Deneslovski: Head straight for the office of the "Presidential Dictator", no distractions.
Demetrius: Correct. Molvado, what are we to do if someone attempts to stop us?
Molvado: Inform them that we are here by request, and should they attempt to stop us physically, pacify them using non-lethal force.
Demetrius: Correct. Uusbekas, what is the first question we ask, no matter what?
Uusbekas: How did you know about and enter Site-██?
Demetrius: Yes, correct. Lastly, Tulmutt, should we attempt to contain this "Presidential Dictator"?
Tulmutt: No, sir.
Demetrius: And why not?
Tulmutt: I don't remember, something about politics and-
Demetrius: So that if they really ARE the leader of some kind of nation, we don't end up starting a war. You got that?
Tulmutt: Yes, sir.
Demetrius: Good. Ah, it seems we've arrived.
The team steps out of the vehicle to reveal a large, glass skyscraper. The camera pans up to reveal that the skyscraper continues upwards and out of view. The building itself has a pair of large, glass doors, with the same insignia as on SCP-XXXX seen over the door. Civilians appear to be walking past without noticing the building.
Demetrius: Alright, everyone inside.
The group opens the doors to reveal a large open lobby, consisting mostly of marble and granite, with a gray carpeted floor and white fluorescent lights. Two doorways can be seen on the left and right walls. In front of them, two human-looking receptionists sit at a desk, also wearing black suits and ties, doing paperwork.
Deneslovski: Um, hello?
One of the receptionist entities looks up sharply, revealing their eyes to be completely black. It speaks in a monotone, almost robotic voice.
Receptionist: Can I help you?
Deneslovski: Um, yes, hello, we're here with the Foundation? Your, well I assume, leader requested to see us?
The entity looks at its paper for a moment, and then back up at the team.
Receptionist: So you're appointment B-36?
Deneslovski: Um, maybe? We were never told our appointment would be receiving a designation.
Receptionist: If you're not sure what your appointment is, you'll have to take Staircase K, to your left.
Demetrius: And where would we go if we knew where our appointment was?
Receptionist: Hallway R, to your right.
Demetrius gestures for the team to follow him down Hallway R, as the receptionist watches them, making no attempt to stop them. They walk down Hallway R for several seconds before emerging through the doorway on the left of the lobby, with the receptionist entity staring at them.
Receptionist: I told you, Staircase K.
The group turns around to reveal that the doorway they just exited through is now a staircase.
Uusbekas: Staircase K it is, I guess.
The group begins walking up Staircase K, which continues forward far farther than the size of the building should allow, before coming to a door. They open this door to reveal an extremely long hallway lined with unmarked doors. They proceed down this hallway for several minutes until a tall humanoid entity can be seen walking down the corridor. It is seen holding a cardboard box filled with papers. It is wearing dress pants and a white button-up shirt, and appears to lack eyes. It stops directly before TMTF-Ψ16 and begins talking in low, monotone voice.
Entity: Um, excuse me? Don't you know the rules?
Demetrius: We are quickly finding out that we do not.
Entity: Well, rule AHT-12978562 states that groups of three or more MUST walk on the right side of any corridor containing sixteen or more doors.
Molvado: Why does it even matter?
The entity shrugs.
Entity: I don't know why you gotta do it, you just gotta.
Demetrius: Look, we were told to go this way because we didn't know our appointment designation.
Entity: Ah, I see. Well, then continue down the hall until you reach the end, there you'll find the Senate Legislative Ambassador. They'll help you out.
Demetrius: Alright then, thank you.
The entity nods and continues down the corridor and out of sight. As the group continues to walk they begin naturally forming a single-file line on the right of the corridor, though they don't seem to notice. They walk for a minute more until they abruptly reach the end of the corridor, where they find a large door. They open it and walk inside, finding a faceless humanoid entity staring down at a desk with several filing cabinets behind them.
Deneslovski: Uh, hello?
The entity looks up at the group and begins to speak in a voice resembling a text-to-speech program, despite lacking a mouth.
Entity: Hello, I am the Senate Legislative Ambassador. How can I help you?
Deneslovski: Yes, we were told to come here to get our appointment designation.
Entity: Ah, yes, and your names are?
Deneslovski: Well I'm-
Demetrius: Classified. Our names are classified.
Entity: Well then you'll need document S.
The entity turns around and removes a stack of documents from one of its filing cabinets. It then sifts through them for several minutes until removing a specific one and placing it on the table.
Deneslovski: So we sign this, and you give us our appointment designation?
Entity: No, you sign this document to agree to sign this document.
The entity places a second document on the desk.
Deneslovski: And that one gives us our appointment designation?
Entity: No, that one means you accept the conditions of the previous document.
Demetrius: So then what's the point?
Entity: Well, it's all dictated in law P-7.
Tulmutt: Can we just not sign these documents?
Entity: Well, yes, but then according to dictation 147 you'll have to fill out Form 21.
The entity places the third document on the desk.
Tulmutt: And what does this one do?
Entity: Well, you signing it means you agree to, based on the wording of law TC-0012-
Uusbekas: That's it, I'm fucking tired of these bullshit meaningless laws.
Uusbekas draws their handgun on the entity.
Uusbekas: I swear to God if you don't give us our-
Entity: Wait wait, say that again!
Uusbekas: What?
Entity: Say what you just said again.
Uusbekas: I swear to God?…
The entity removes another document and reads it for a moment before turning to the group again.
Entity: Your appointment designation is B-36. Please exit through the door you came in.
The entity goes back to staring at the desk. The members of TMTF-Ψ16 give each other confused looks before turning around and opening the door, finding themselves back in the lobby. One of the receptionists looks up at TMTF-Ψ16.
Receptionist: Did you get your appointment designation?
Molvado: Yes, we were told it was B-36? Wait a second, wasn't that what you-
Receptionist: Good. Please go down Hallway R until you reach the filing room. Once there, please speak to the Chief Governmental Archivist.
The group heads across the lobby and down the hallway that previously lead them back to the lobby, this time terminating in a pitch-black room. The group stops and looks around until seeing a light switch on the wall behind them, flicking it turns on the lights. The light reveals an entity standing directly in front of them. It is wearing a gray suit and tie. Instead of feet, the entity appears to have wheels similar to those seen on a desk chair and lacks a head entirely. It is wearing a small metal pin stating, "Chief Governmental Archivist". The room itself is extremely large, with rows of filing cabinets continuing onward out of view, both forward and upward. The presence of the entity greatly startles TMTF-Ψ16.
Uusbekas: Can… can we help you?
The entity gestures to its pin.
Uusbekas: So your who we are supposed to talk to?
The entity turns around and gestures down the row of filing cabinets, before beginning to roll down the row.
Demetrius: Let's move, people.
The group begins following the entity. Several smaller versions of this entity can be seen rolling about from shelf to shelf. After several minutes, the entity stops at a shelf, opens it, looks through it for a moment, and then removes five ticket-like pieces of paper, handing one to each member of TMTF-Ψ16. It then gestures down the hallway, before rolling away in the opposite direction. TMTF-Ψ16 begins moving in the direction the entity gestured until they come upon a doorway at the end of the hall. Suddenly, the sound of static begins being heard over the transmission, and the camera feed cuts out for seven minutes and twenty-three seconds. When it comes back on, the members of TMTF-Ψ16 can be seen in an entirely new area of SCP-XXXX-A, a small room with several makeshift beds made of paper on the ground.
Uusbekas: I say we try to find some kind of entity that can get us out of here, screw that president king thing or whatever.
Demetrius: Not until we get back in contact with the Foundation.
Uusbekas: We don't know that's ever gonna happen!
Demetrius: Fine, we'll wait a week, and then try to find a way out.
Uusbekas: A week? A WEEK!? We've already been here for THREE FUCKING DAYS, and you want us to wait another WEEK!?
Demetrius: I am your commander, you will do as I say!
Uusbekas: Listen, I may not be able to shoot any of the things that live here, but I sure as hell can shoot you!
Uusbekas reaches to pull his gun on Demetrius.
Deneslovski: WAIT! WAIT, GUYS, LOOK AT THE CAMERA!
TMTF-Ψ16 turns to the camera and then rushes towards it, with Tulmutt picking it up.
Tulmutt: We have a connection! We have a connection!
Uusbekas: Oh thank god…
Uusbekas puts their gun away as Demetrius takes the camera.
Demetrius: Look, we've been trying to meet this "Presidential Dictator", as scheduled, but everyone we talk to just leads us off in another direction. Despite the thousands of rules that everyone seems to cite, nothing actually seems to mean anything here, and any time we try to stray from the path, we end up right back where we started. We're planning to go find something to sign that can get us out of here. Well, let's move people!
TMTF-Ψ16 gets up and starts moving towards the door. They open it to reveal a long, empty hallway.
Demetrius: For the record, that was a giant conference hall before.
The group continues down the hallway for several minutes until they reach a single door in the wall. They open it to find a small room with two more doors, one on either wall. Tulmutt opens the door on the right wall and walks through it, at which point he exits through the door on the left wall. He then turns around goes back through the door on the left wall and exits back through the door on the right wall. He then starts running in a loop into the right door and out the left door. He does this several times.
Deneslovski: What… what are you doing?
Tulmutt stops.
Tulmutt: I'm tired of being stuck in this place full of laws I don't understand. I'm going to stay here, in this room, where I understand the rules.
Demetrius: But what's the point of understanding the rules of this room if those rules don't really mean anything?
Tulmutt: They don't need to mean anything if I don't leave the room.
Demetrius: But whether you leave the room or not, the rules have no bearing on anything else! They're purposeless.
Tulmutt: They don't need to have a bearing on anything else if I don't see anything else.
Tulmutt shrugs and continues running through the doors.
Demetrius: God dammit… fine, just leave them. Let's keep going.
Everyone except Molvado starts moving towards the exit.
Uusbekas: You comin', Molv?
Molvado: Well, I mean, if it makes sense to Tulmutt, it must have some reasoning in it.
Demetrius: What do you mean!? I just explained why his logic is meaningless!
Molvado looks at the group, and then back at Tulmutt, before joining them in running loops through the two doors.
Demetrius: We're not going to force you to come, so if this is a joke, it ends NOW.
Tulmutt stops running, looks at the group, shakes their head and continues running.
Demetrius: I… Alright. Let's go.
The next several minutes of the footage consists of the remaining members of TMTF-Ψ16 walking down multiple empty hallways. After approximately fifteen minutes of this, the group finally comes to a small child-sized door at the end of a hallway. They open it and crawl through, finding themselves in a miniature office space. Sitting at a small desk, there is a child-sized humanoid wearing a light gray suit with a 1960's television of unknown brand in place of a head. The entity seems very busy with some form of paperwork, and TMTF-Ψ16 gathers around its desk.
Deneslovski: Yes, hello?
The entity looks up, displaying the word "Hello!" on its television screen.
Deneslovski: Um, yes, we're trying to leave. Can you help us with that?
The entity takes a document out of a stack of papers behind it and places it on the desk. Deneslovski signs it and the entity takes it, before placing another document on the desk. This repeats for several minutes.
Uusbekas: This clearly isn't working. Deneslovski, let's get out of here.
Deneslovski: No no no, wait, let me sign a few more documents.
Uusbekas: What are you talking about? This is clearly going nowhere.
Deneslovski: But what if the next one gets us out of here?
Uusbekas: And what are you going to do when it doesn't?
Deneslovski: Well, I'll sign the next one, because-
Uusbekas: Maybe that one will get us out of here?
Deneslovski: Exactly! If I just keep signing them, I'm sure eventually one will get us out.
Uusbekas: No, it won't! Come on, we need to move!
Uusbekas attempts to grab Deneslovski by the arm, to which Deneslovski replies by shoving them back.
Deneslovski: If you guys wanna stay here forever, that's fine. But you can't force me to stay with you.
Uusbekas: Are you serious!? You're the one who's gonna be stuck here forever signing fucking papers!
Deneslovski: Well, you never know, the next one might get me out.
Uusbekas: It won't!
Deneslovski: But it might.
Uusbekas: I swear to god, we've already lost two people, so if you don't-
Demetrius: Uusbekas, forget it. Let's just go.
Uusbekas stares at Deneslovski for a second, who has gone back to signing papers. He then looks back at Demetrius and they continue moving. The exit the small room to find themselves in a large hallway, which they continue down for some time longer until coming to an almost empty room, the only thing in this room being a single mug, in which are held several pens.
[END LOG]