Jamcon 2020

First time at Ambrose? Do you know where we came from? No, that's okay, no one does.

What's that? You don't care? You're just here for the food? Please, have a seat, relax. The menu will be here shortly.

No no, I'm not wasting my time talking to you. Why ever would you think that? Because these places are usually packed? Well it seems that virus has everyone in a scare. Ridiculous if you ask me. Maybe it's a blessing in disguise, giving me a chance to talk to you. I've always wanted to tell the story of Ambrose, you know. I even wrote a book about it in my youth! It didn't sell well though. The Foundation censored it pretty quickly.

Oh, the menu hasn't come yet? That's a shame, I hoped our service would be more enthusiastic for such a special guest. Well every client is special, that's the mindset! Where do I begin? Chaz Ambrose is a mysterious figure to common workers. I've heard good things about him, but he seems out of his depth, you know? And that kind of attitude, well, it's bad for business. What am I on about? Are you implying my explanations are imperfect? Well, the restaurants serve a variety of anomalous meals, Phoenix, Sea monster eggs, all sorts. And these dishes have to come from somwhere, yes? Here's the problem, Chaz gets a bit… squeamish about these kinds of things.

I already told you I don't know him personally! It's one of the many privileges you get when becoming the official Ambrose Biographer, that's all. Well, I suppose I've talked to Chaz, yes, but does that mean I know him? Understand him? Get what makes him tick? Of course not! I'm not dancing around anything, bucko. I'm just… Ok, I didn't mean to tell you this much, so stay quiet! But I've gone too far, haven't I? Chaz doesn't have the stomach for the anomalous world. Too easy to do something horrible, end up as a Sarkic Priest or whatever. Chaz knows this, fears this, and that makes him weak. Yes, he's only the owner of a food chain, but that's no small deal in the anomalous world. Everything is dangerous, everything is underground, everything is always under some kind of threat.

I'm rambling, aren't I? I've only confused you, haven't I? Sorry, it's a bit hard to keep it straight when there's so much one wants to say. No, I don't know what's going on with the service here today, truly abysmal.

I'll try to be clearer, K? Chaz needs complex, dangerous ingredients to keep Ambrose's identity. And he's unwilling to go all the way for many of these… sometimes it's because of legitimate reasons, but just as often he's just scared. It really limits our options. He used to be much worse though, back in the thirties he wouldn't even authorise alcohol! Because of prohibition! Tell me, do you think any law enforcement at the time could even discover where a location was? No, the Fondation didn't care about alcohol either.

So yeah, Chaz doesn't know about alot of the things that happen around his restaurants, but when he finds out he usually acts as if he didn't. For example, in our three portlands location we had to resort to Sarkic magic to grow eggs into dinosaurs. Now, Chaz had issued a direct order to the owner of said establishment not to dabble in anything outside of the usual suppliers, and it seemed as if he would be fired. But when Chaz was informed of the matter he just… ignored it. Never said a word about it!

Oh, here's your menu. Say, would you like my advice? I believe that- oh. You don't want my advice.

Well, enough about old Chaz, what are you doing here? You don't seem like our usual clientele. Granted, most of our usual customers are too scared to leave their shells because of some dumb disease. How come you aren't scared? Me personally, I'm over 150 years old thanks to these Anderson prosthetics, and I don't think any virus could survive in what little tissue that's left in me. I know, you couldn't tell I'm a day over 40! That just goes to show how effective these really are. Chaz? I'm pretty sure he's over 200 by now, but I'm really not sure. No clue how he's immortal either, he'd need something alot older than Anderson to be around since… whenever he's been around.

That's what I really meant when I said that Chaz is mysterious. Anyone can have a chat with him, see him, get to know him. But he won't talk about anything pre-1910. That's very annoying for me, you see, because the first two Ambrose locations were already open by then.

Back to you though, what are you doing here? Eating at a fine dining place all on your lonesome? Doesn't make much sense to me, but if you're into it… Are you an affiliate of anyone? Marshall Carter and Dark? Three moons? Why are you in La Rue Macbre to begin with? Alright, I suppose we're pretty of place here as well, so I'll answer first.

Prospecting for this place began around the Clinton presidency. I can't pinpoint a more exact date which is really frustrating to me, seeing I was alive at the time. Well, that's actually the reason I'm here, to find out more about this place. I know a bit from my occasional interactions with Chaz, but nothing specific. Anyways, the place was more chaotic back then, if you can believe it. So chaotic, in fact, that no one officially owned 'The never 'n not'. So one of the legal guys from MC&D notices this and thinks: 'man, I'd really like some good old Ambrose food around here'. We have a few agreements with MC&D, and in one of them they offered us 'The never 'n not'. Some lower executive signed the dotted line, but Chaz wasn't keen on it. He told me he didn't think the place was right for the brand and that there would be local hostility for uprooting an existing business. But MC&D had already paid the money, and so somehow we ended up with this place at the edge of town. I'd like to know more about the negotiations between us and MC&D, that's part of the reason I'm here.

And you? You're not going to tell me why you're in the butt of the anomalous world? You don't seem to be MC&D, you don't seem to be a Serpant, hell, you don't even seem fit to be UIU!

What about the sea monster eggs? Speak up. You, know what, I have a recording device on my arm, thanks Anderson. Let's see… Ah! You thought we didn't serve those because the GOC took them all? And how would you know something like that?

Oh. I see.

Well I won't say you don't have good taste, they were delicious.