Kizdspeed5

Item #: SCP-3497088

An image of one of the specimens before it was captured

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures:
Keep the specimens in containment with at least 3 inches of ballistic armor and an inch of sound absorbent material on any given wall, or 5 inches of ballistic glass for windows. Always have at least one camera monitoring the specimens at all times. They do not need food as they somehow generate food on their own. Beware of the highly dangerous sound of their frying pans, as repeated exposure can damage the eardrum and can even cause insanity.

When visiting inside containment, wear the same color as what they are wearing, and do not under any circumstances hear the sound of their frying pan. Wear the complimentary soundproof, shockproof, and bulletproof clothing, crafted by our resident "Soundsmith" at all times when in the cage.

Description:
Our four specimens, also known as The [REDACTED] are what appear to be four middle aged men. They run slower than your average human but can carry high loads. They are very durable and can take many bullets. The entities wield shotguns, which fire fast and are dangerous at close range. They also sometimes use various melee weapons such as different kinds of boxing gloves, their fists, or even frying pans.

Their behavior is highly predatory. They are noted to act like pirahnas, descending upon any prey they find. They have been observed to pick up and use their victim's [REDACTED] if compatible. When killed, they reappear about 5-15 seconds later in a nearby location. They have also been observed saying "Put this dispenser here", often shortening it to "Pootis"