Magnus Seminar Lesson Plan

Action: How not to Sound like a Tryhard

Lesson Objective:

To write effective, stylistic, and relevant action where necessary without sounding like you've watched too much anime.

Introduction

  • Welcome to the Action Seminar! The purpose of this seminar is to familiarize you a bit with the various methods of writing action, and to write it effectively! There's quite a bit to cover, so let's dive in!
  • We're going to cover a few topics today, including the purpose of action, when and how to use action effectively, the use of language viewpoint and style in action, and dialogue during action. We'll also have an activity at the end where you can put some of what you've learned to the test!

Part 1 - The purpose of Action Scenes

  • Good examples of actions supporting a story
    • Jim Butcher - Fast paced action
    • L.E. Modessit Jr - methodical/dry action
  • Bad examples of action hindering a story
    • Eragon
    • Most coldposts involving military or melee forces.

Part 2 - When and How to use Action Effectively

  • When should an action sequence be in a tale/skip?
    • The most effective time to use action is generally at the climax of a story. That's the point when tension has reached its highest point, and it's ready to boil over. The characters can't help but to burst in to action.
    • Conversly, it's also okay to open with action. It can set the tone, and gives the reader a kick in the teeth early.
  • How long should an action sequence be?
    • As long as it needs to be to resolve the conflict. It might be a climactic, long duel, or it might be a few lines of someone plugging a redshirt with a couple of 9mm rounds. It depends what the story needs, and what exactly you're trying to accomplish. No one wants to read six pages of two guys fighting, no matter how good the author is. It has to be broken up.

Part 3 - Language, Viewpoint, and Style

  • Why PoV matters.
    • Every character is going to act differently during action. Trained agents will be very different from Doctors. Civilians are not going to turn in to Rambo when gunfire starts. Most likely your scientist is a crappy shot. Who you're writing the perspective of matters a great deal in what actually happens on the page.
    • You can only write what your character knows. If he's a civilian, he probably isn't able to recognize krav maga, or the type of RPG being used by the guy shooting at them.
  • Individuals vs teams as action.
    • When writing an individual you only need to follow their actions. You generally don't need action tags (which are very similar to dialogue tags) in order to describe their actions, especially in first person.
    • A team of people on the other hand are all going to act at the same time usually. You can't dwell on just one of them, and you shouldn't. Giving everyone a name and a superbadass action is going to be boring. After the third named character doing things, I usually check out. Try and keep it to Character A, Character B, and RedShirtWhoProbablyGetsCapped C.
  • Research, research, research.
    • I cannot stress enough how important this is. If you don't know how to swordfight (and you don't, probably) find out what it's actually like from an expert. Like me.
    • If you've never shot a gun before, do some research. What caliber do they have? What's the recoil like?
    • Ever stabbed or sliced something before? No? Youtube some wound anatomy or something. Nothing worse than a stab producing a "fountain of blood" whatever that means.
    • If you know something, and your POV character doesn't, don't go in to details. Dr. Michael Magnus knows nothing about guns. So he knows that Helen is a giant revolver, everything else is a "rifle" or a "pistol". He's not going to know the difference between a P90 and a Mosin-Nagant.
  • How to choose a style of action.
    • I like to break this down in to two major categories (with the caveat that this is a simplification and these further subdivide):
      • "Fast" action which is a lot of yelling, and fast paced motion, and generally is told from a more character-driven perspective.
        • Fast Action generally is much more about the emotional state of the characters, their immediate physical actions, and the challenges rapidly assaying them. Jim Butcher is a good example of a fast action writer.
      • "Methodical" action which is drier, and reads more like a tom clancey novel, lots of characters doing things without a lot of emotions or descriptive language.
        • Methodical action reads more like an after-action report. Things happen, mostly in a detached way, with maybe some descriptive language thrown in once in a while.
        • L.E. Modessit Jr and Tom Clancey are methodical action writers.
  • Injuries during action sequences.
    • Any injury sustained in a fight is going to significantly hinder you.
    • Humans cannot shrug off stab wounds, bullet wounds, or even significant contusions.
    • Head wounds are basically K.O. unless the character is exceptionally tough, and even then, the next few lines should be the character trying to clear their vision and regain clarity to their thoughts.
    • Getting punched hurts. I don't recommend it in real life.
    • Bandages do not heal gunshot wounds.
    • Real medics don't pull out the bullet.
  • Writing action when your point of view isn’t 3rd person omniscient (e.g. audio logs).
    • Research is critical here. You need to know what the sound of a stun grenade is like to an audio recording. (Hint: loud.) You should also know what the sound of a pin being pulled from a modern grenade sounds like. (Hint: youtube.)
    • For the love of god, don't start having your MTF captain curse up a storm because he encountered something. Watch a few videos of real life militaries encountering something.
  • Things to avoid.
    • Characters, even superhuman ones, cannot jump back or forward tens of yards.
    • If you're going to write swordfighting, get an expert opinion, or I will eviscerate it.
    • Being a superbadass fighter isn't really that impressive. I am objectively very dangerous, and three untrained guys could probably take me.
    • The moment you're in the air, strength takes a backseat to physics.
    • Humans cannot punch "through" most things. Including doors.
    • Humans cannot easily kick down doors without assistance.

Part 4 - Dialogue During Action

  • Casual Conversation is not okay.
    • Snappy one liners are cool in bond movies, but you can't do that in combat. It's stressful, and chaotic, and you're trying to survive.
  • How people communicate under stress
    • Most people freak the fuck out when something bad happens. Some people go silent, some people start screaming. Trained people can still do this if they're new to combat.
    • Militaries and security forces do not act like untrained assholes when fighting starts. They tend to stay coordinated, and follow orders.
  • Oxygen, and why your characters need it.
    • Your characters cannot talk, sprint, and fight at the same time. Your characters will be breathing heavily after 10 seconds of sprinting, two punches tops, or diving in to cover once. They can't have a longwinded soliloquy afterwards. They're going to be out of breath. If they're trained or in shape, it won't hinder them to do these things, breathing heavily is kind of the point.
  • Writing military/security communication.
    • I suggest you do your research here. I'm not an expert on military communication, but I'm pretty sure screaming "tango down" is going to be cringy.

Part 5 - Activity!

The following are prompts, and participants should give the next line to see if they can write what realistically comes next.

  • DeLuca about to swing at an enemy.
  • Rex Donnarson communicating with a team member currently under fire.
  • Agent DuMourne's teammate is shot in the shoulder in front of him.
  • Director Diaghilev places his shoulder against the corner, and…
  • DrMagnus trips during his sprint, and falls down the stairs, he…

Examples from my own work

Fast Paced Action:

Methodical Action - Compare and Contrasting action

Magic and Military

Part 6 - Conclusion

  • Go over topics you have covered briefly, in a summary
  • Link any resources you think are applicable
  • Assure participants they can come to you if they have any questions
  • Take questions
  • Thank everyone for coming