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=== ATTENTION ===
|THE SCP CONCEPTS AND TALES HERE HAVE BEEN AUTHORED BY USER MARCUSLCRASSUS
|THE THEME HERE WAS CREATED BY MARCUSLCRASSUS
|THE INFORMATION ON THESE SCP CONCEPTS AND TALES ARE **NOT** FINAL UNTIL REVIEWED AND POSTED TO SITE
|IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO REVIEW OR GREENLIGHT THESE CONCEPTS, PLEASE CONTACT MARCUSLCRASSUS THROUGH:
|>WIKI PM (SLOWEST)
|>DISCORD PM (FASTEST) @ CRASSUS#1776
|>TWITTER PM (ALSO FAST) @ MarcusL_Crassus
RICHEST MAN IN ROME BAYBEEE :)
MLC
- FUNNY PRINTER (TEST JOKE SCP)
- Perceived Threat Monster
- Submechanophobia
- Your Own Personal Apocalypse
Item #: SCP-XXXX
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: Due to the innocuous nature of SCP-XXXX, SCP-XXXX is currently kept inside the Site-69 workplace inside of Sublevel 2's copying room, protected by a secure card-locked door. Personnel intending to use SCP-XXXX must be aware of the warning placards in the printer room. SCP-XXXX may only be used by personnel with Level 2 security clearance or higher with no exceptions. SCP-XXXX may only be used for work-related purposes. All personnel that do not intend to use SCP-XXXX for work-related purposes will be reprimanded, and unauthorized print jobs will be reported to Site-69 Admin. Under no circumstances should SCP-XXXX be given the command to print infinite amounts of paper. Following Incident #XXXX-B, personnel are requested to keep extraneous clothing articles such as ties, long hair, and other extremities away from SCP-XXXX-B.
Testing on SCP-XXXX is currently awaiting approval by the Admin of Site-69.
Description: SCP-XXXX is a modern business-style paper printing machine with standard copying and scanning capabilities. On the front of the machine, adjacent to a smartphone-style 2.7-inch color touchscreen (normally displaying a smiling yellow cartoon face) is a plaque of identification: "Hüebert-Paxton XColor Pro VibroFan Deluxe Quantum Printer". Despite its unremarkable exterior, SCP-XXXX quickly gained the Foundation's interest, since no such object as what the machine displays even exists in the world, let alone the company Hüebert-Paxton.
SCP-XXXX
SCP-XXXX's touch screen is fully-functional and non-anomalous. SCP-XXXX is capable of connecting to any local wifi network, at which point it can run print jobs from any computer, smartphone, or similar device connected to the network. SCP-XXXX is also noteworthy for the speed at which it prints — it is capable of printing high-quality professional documents at 350 pages per minute (See Discovery.)
The anomalous properties of SCP-XXXX manifests when it is used to print paper. Regardless of whether the paper tray is filled or empty, if ink cartridges are supplied, or if the machine is connected to a power source, the printer will print as if it is filled completely. Observation of the interior of the printing tray remotely has shown spontaneous generation of paper from a space-time anomaly that is not yet understood by the Foundation. Further testing has shown that there is no definite limit to the amount of paper SCP-XXXX can print. SCP-XXXX thus does not require a power source to operate and can operate indefinitely without the need to plug it in to an outlet. It also does not possess any visible power switches anywhere on the machine. Plugging SCP-XXXX into a power outlet does not affect it whatsoever.
An additional feature of SCP-XXXX is its ability to enter an "infinite print" loop once given a command to print infinite copies of a document. Such operators accepted by SCP-XXXX are "inf", "infinite", "a lot", and other vague phrases resembling an intention to print an indefinite number of paper. When this mode is active, SCP-XXXX will repeatedly print the last printed piece of paper indefinitely, until the "STOP" button adjacent to the touch screen is pressed. On 50% of all tests, this button does not work, requiring a second press. On rare occasions, it will not work for a third time after it is pressed. The approximate number of presses the "STOP" button requires to abort a SCP-XXXX is random, varying between 1 and 237 full presses. Holding the "STOP" button with intent to shut down SCP-XXXX will not result in SCP-XXXX ceasing operation.
SCP-XXXX possesses a paper shredder connected the side, known as SCP-XXXX-B. It is identifiable by the "Hüebert-Paxton XTreMe VibroBlade Deluxe Paper Shredder" plaque. SCP-XXXX-B's anomalous properties manifest when part of an object of sufficient size is inserted into the paper shredder, which activates SCP-XXXX-B and subsequently destroys whatever object is inserted into it, regardless of the material. Thus far, paper, metal sheets, and reinforced armor plating have all proven to be acceptable items to SCP-XXXX. Objects removed from SCP-XXXX-B mid-shredding are cut cleanly at the end of whatever angle they are inserted into the shredder.
SCP-XXXX-B's waste bin will notably stay empty even after large-scale shredding. Remote observation of SCP-XXXX-B's waste bin is currently impossible, leading for some researchers to draw the conclusion that SCP-XXXX-B's wastebin functions as a miniature [REDACTED].
Discovery: SCP-XXXX was first brought to the Foundation's attention after local agents responded to a badly translated report from local police forces of a "broken printer" that could not stop printing paper in an office building of the ███████ Corporation in Caracas, Venezuela, on ████ █, 2020. Amnestics were later administered on site, and information about the event suppressed, with the cover-up of a police operation.
SCP-XXXX was first discovered by responding Special Agents John and Smith, who arrived on scene to find the office building swarmed with an indeterminate number of copies of paper. With much difficulty, Agents John and Smith located SCP-XXXX in a printing room underneath a large amount of paper. After deeming the situation to be too difficult to deactivate the SCP themselves, Agents John and Smith called in for backup. Due to miscommunication, the Foundation dispatched MTF Pi-88 "Radioheads" after misinterpreting Sp. Agents John and Smith's report for that of great danger. MTF Pi-88 arrived on the scene, quickly using the information provided by Agents Smith and John to locate SCP-XXXX amid the massive amounts of paper. Specialist ████████ managed to turn off SCP-XXXX by "repeatedly mashing the 'STOP' button with the handle of his breaching hammer." SCP-XXXX then ceased printing, and was loaded by MTF onto a recovery helicopter and extracted from the area to Site-69 for inprocessing. Sp. Agents John and Smiff concluded cleaning the site approx. 12 hours later, and later questioned ███████ Offices employees and local police to ascertain who activated the SCP, before administering amnestics.
As of the creation of this document, it is unknown who gave SCP-XXXX the function to infinitely print.
Addendum #XXXX-A: On February 1, 20XX, Researcher B. Forrest was found during late hours in Site-69's copy room, printing thousands of documents covered with the phrase "ALL WORK AND NO PLAY MAKES JACK A DULL BOY" from SCP-XXXX on an infinite print job. He has since been reprimanded and prohibited from using SCP-XXXX again, and has been demoted to Level-1 temporarily as punishment. Researcher Forrest was then assigned to cleaning up SCP-XXXX's print room.
Addendum #XXXX-B: On April 26, 20XX, Dr. A. Wong was administered to the Site-69 infirmary after a large amount of her hair was forcefully ripped out after accidentally falling into SCP-XXXX-B, after cleaning a coffee spill. The same day, a Janitor attempting to clean the SCP's waste bin was severely injured in his right hand after "sticking his hand into the machine out of morbid curiosity," according to witnesses, resulting in a prolonged stay at the infirmary. SCP-XXXX's copy room was closed for approximately two days following the incident, then re-opened with warning labels on the walls informing personnel to keep all loose and extraneous clothing articles away from SCP-XXXX-B, which appears to be active at all times.
Admin Notice: SCP-XXXX is not a toy and should not be treated as one. I do not want to hear about a sort of incident like #XXXX-A ever again.
- Site-69 Administration
LONGER SCP/GOI DRAFTS:
TALE DRAFTS:
Perceived Threat (ON HIATUS)
Sasha's Cleaning Products (WIP)
Unnamed GOC tale
MAINSITE POSTS:
Winners Don't Do Drugs
LTE-1004-Caliburn-Velveteen






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