Mnichu

Item #: SCP-XXXX-j

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP should be at all times contained in a level 4 security chamber in a EMP resistant electronic safe locked with a simultaneously three passcards given to 3 level 4 personnel and 1 master card given to [REDACTED] of O5 councel. SCP should also be guarded by two Guards equiped with sound canceling headphone at all times. Any sign of containment breach of SCP should be immediately reported to Site's [REDACTED] security team. All instances of SCP-XXXX-j should be incinerated immediatly after seizure.

Description: SCP is a scrap of paper measuring 296,5 mm by 177 mm by 0,05 mm, originating from England, [REDACTED] and was first documented by foundations in the year 1947. Anomalous effect of SCP appear only after any phrase is written on its surface, parts of SCP that have been altered with a writing tool are designated to be named SCP-XXXX-j-X, X being the consecutive roman numeral.
Reading or hearing the phrase or phrases written on SCP-XXXX-j quickly cause a mental decline in persons psychological consciousness by making the person laugh uncotrollably which in turn causes suffocation due to lack of oxygen. All perssonnel that have been exposed to SCP anomalous effect had died exacly due to this cause. Its known that phrase or phrases in languages that a person does not understand does not cause any mental effect on that person. Its also known that destroying SCP X will deprive it of its anomalous effect.
There was one event when containment Site of SCP has been breached by Chaos Insergency with a aim of retreaving SCP-XXXX-j, ending with seizure of SCP-XXXX-j and creation of SCP-XXXX-j-III to SCP-XXXX-j-VI. For more information see the Addendum 1.

Addendum 1

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On 12/10/[REDACTED] Chaos Insurgency units has breached SCP Foundation security with a aim of realesing and/or reatreving SCP's in Site [REDACTED]. In this breach, CI units have succesfully broke into the containment chamber of SCP-XXXX-j and created instances of SCP-XXXX-j-III to SCP-XXXX-j-VI. After a succesfull MTF recontainment, this instances were destroyed by inceneration. The MTF unit, however, seized the CI list of possible phrases written on SCP-XXXX-j. The contents of the list is written in Addendum 2. After this breach contaiment procedures of SCP-XXXX-j were made more strict to improve the security of its contaiment.

Addendum 2

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List of phrases that have been seized by MTF unit during containment breach in Site [REDACTED]

Yo mama so ugly, that even SCP-106 looks cuter

Yo mama so loud, that she woked up SCP-2713

Yo mama so hairy, that shes hairier than SCP-1000

Yo mama so disfigured, that even SCP-999 can't heal her

Yo mama so dead, that even SCP-47 won't do a surgery on her

Yo mama so dumb, that she dumber that a class D personnel smoking SCP-420-J

Yo mama so sick, that she had to be operated by approved medical personnel who have not taken the Hippocratic Oath.

Yo mama so [REDACTED], that [DATA EXPUNGED]