TALE: Capitalist Offences
Dr. Ox had always considered himself a bit of a sleuth, among other things, although he hadn't really done much sleuthing for the Foundation specifically, as most of the mysteries he had access to were in his own neighborhood, and they were all fairly minor cases. However, today was different. Today was the day he finally got to prove himself. Today was the day that he got to interview dado.
Dr. Ox drove along the roads through compressed space that the Foundation had recently built, wondering about how dado would present himself. Would he speak as in his text message logs, or as in his advertisement for Herbie Fucker's Circus? Dr. Ox wondered for so long, he nearly missed a turn to his exit portal.
Dr. Ox recorded a couple of suburban homes, surrounded by the usual bushes and flowers, as he drove past them when his camera suddenly switched to what looked like the artstyle of an old 1930's cartoon. He wondered how that was even possible, when his camera reverted back to normal just as quickly as it had started.
Dr. Ox drove into the driveway of the provided address when his camera flickered again - this time to the artstyle of an old Nintendo game!
There was very clearly an anomalous effect in the area, and he knew exactly who the culprit was
Item #: SCP-⍟
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-⍟ is to be contained in a hemispherical chamber 3 meters in diameter at Site-237.
Description: SCP-⍟ is a seemingly ordinary "Twilight Turtle" light soother, except for the fact that the color buttons have been replaced with buttons labelled "Enhance", "Invert", and "Nullify"
While powered on, in addition to displaying star patterns on the ceiling, any anomalous effects are increased, inverted, or weakened, depending on the setting within 2.73 meters.
Item #: SCP-🌐
Clearance Level 2: Restricted
Containment Class: Euclid
Disruption Class: Vlam
Risk Class: Notice
Special Containment Procedures: Hyperlinks to SCP-🌐 will be removed from the web via REDACTOR2.exe and those who see SCP-🌐 will be administered amnestics.
Description: SCP-🌐 is a website titled "mitchelldance by dado" that holds the URL dado.com/mitchelldance featuring four distinct animated GIFs (hereby dubbed SCP-🌐-1 through SCP-🌐-4) of a small being performing various dances and a song (hereby SCP-🌐-5) that plays in the background.
The entity found within SCP-🌐-1 through SCP-🌐-4 cannot be described by any objective means; it is therefore effectively infinitely 𝒩.
SCP-🌐-5 is saved in SCP-🌐's files as "uWillShareMitchelldance.mp3". Any person who hears SCP-🌐-5 (hereby the "subject"), whether via SCP-🌐 or not, will be unable to forget it regardless of how unpleasant they find it. 10 minutes after the initial contact with SCP-🌐-5, the subject will start vocalizing its main melody (once again, regardless of how unpleasant it is to them). 20 minutes after the initial hearing, the subject will begin to seek out other people to, depending on whether the subject found SCP-🌐-5 enjoyable or not, instruct to visit the site or instruct not to. Due to the nature of human minds, these both inevitably lead to the same conclusion.
Things Dr. Auteaux Is Not Allowed To Do At The Foundation
- Dr. Auteaux cannot use Bright's list as a "to do" list.
- Dr. Auteaux cannot use Bright's list as a "to be" list.
- Bright's list is a work of fiction produced by Bright's colleagues for humorous purposes. Dr. Auteaux is not to claim otherwise.
- Dr. Auteaux cannot class-F amnesticize colleagues personnel anyone as a "vibe check".
- Dr. Auteaux is not allowed to produce class-F amnestics, even though he has the ability to do so physically.
- Dr. Auteaux cannot order "class-D amnesiacs" as a "test of reading comprehension".
- Dr. Auteaux cannot use SCP-914 on "Very Fine" to create anart.
- This is for Dr. Auteaux's own safety.
- Dr. Auteaux can speak fluent English and should not claim otherwise.
- Dr. Auteaux is not God.
- Dr. Auteaux is not Satan.
Item #: SCP-🤗
Clearance Level 2: Restricted
Containment Class: Euclid
Disruption Class: Vlam
Risk Class: Warning
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-🤗 is to be contained in a cell with approximately 7 meter by 3 meter by 5 meter proportions. SCP-🤗's containment cell is to contain a sipper water bottle and two food bowls, one with dry kibble and one with iron shavings. All of these are to be refilled daily by D-class personnel wearing full-face masks made of plexiglass. The containment cell is also to contain mirrors, disco balls, and other reflective objects for entertainment purposes.
Description: SCP-🤗 is a dark green amorphous blob that has blurry vision and eats metal and normal food but he hugs faces which is bad
Addendum: (Testing logs describing how it's taught not to hug faces)
We should probably downgrade its Risk class to Caution - some doctor
No - a higher ranking doctor
Item #: SCP-✅
Clearance Level 2: Restricted
Containment Class: Euclid
Disruption Class: ??
Risk Class: ??
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-✅ is held in some vault at some site.
Description: SCP-✅ is a U Brands Contempo 11" x 14" dry erase board with magnetic properties. If an activity is written on it and a square is drawn to the activity's left, dry erase ink will anomalously form into the shape of a check mark or a cross, depending on whether the most recent person to touch the board had performed the action or not.
Discovery:
Addendum: 5/20: Dr. Ox, Drs. Natalie & Edward Nevro, Dr. Lane, and Dr. ███████ Test Log
Most Recent Touch:
Activity:
Result:
Per 
