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Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid Thaumiel

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX-related groups are to be funded and monitored by the Society of Christian Parents, a Foundation front organization. All groups with a membership of over 20 SCP-XXXX instances are to be infiltrated by specialized agents in order to further monitor their activities and focus the group's efforts towards supporting mundane pro-Foundation causes.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a group of entities that are active on social media website Facebook. Facebook accounts of SCP-XXXX instances use full names and profile pictures of real individuals. The individuals whose names and pictures are used do not possess any knowledge of SCP-XXXX.

SCP-XXXX instances write in the English language, and possess general fluency. Notably, an SCP-XXXX instance has never been observed to make a spelling mistake.

SCP-XXXX instances frequently discard accounts, making it difficult to ascertain the number of SCP-XXXX entities in existence. However, it is estimated that between 200 and 300 SCP-XXXX accounts are active at any given time. Attempts to trace the location of the accounts have failed.

The primary activity of SCP-XXXX instances is in online advocacy groups. In order for a group to be joined by SCP-XXXX instances, it must fit the following criteria:

• Have no more than 200 members.
• Communicate primarily in English.
• Not be overseen by a governing organization.
• Be affiliated in some manner with Protestant Christianity.

Once one SCP-XXXX instance joins a group, it is often joined by many other SCP-XXXX instances. This may indicate some form of communication between SCP-XXXX instances.

SCP-XXXX instances will then attempt to convince the group to advocate for a certain goal. This goal will, in most cases, be a frivolous endeavour, but may be detrimental to public health/safety¹. This proposal is generally dismissed by the human residents of the group. SCP-XXXX will persist in attempting to convince the group to pursue this goal, using nonsensical/inane arguments.

If an SCP-XXXX instance is banned from the Facebook group, or from Facebook itself, all other SCP-XXXX instances will write a message of disgust and leave the group. All humans members of the group (even those who did not interact with an SCP-XXXX instance) will then experience nausea and mild headaches lasting for approximately 24 hours.

+ Example of SCP-XXXX-written text

Observed on 2/12/2016, in a Facebook group for a church in █████, Iowa. SCP-XXXX was using the name of "Mary Anderson", and attempting to advocate for earthworms to be declared enemies of the state.
Jennifer Cooke: Mary, I'm afraid I just don't follow you. What's wrong with worms? I love seeing them in my garden.
Mary Anderson: The earthworm sets a bad example for the youth! It doesn't plant. It doesn't hunt. All it does is crawl around in the dirt. If kids see earthworms survive just by eating dirt, they'll think they won't have to do anything with their lives. Furthermore, earthworms can destabilize the ground by digging too many holes. Do you want your house to fall into a sinkhole because too many worm tunnels were underneath it? And finally, have you seen those things? They look positively phallic. We can't have them crawling around our innocent children!

SCP-XXXX was formerly contained by the use of Foundation webcrawlers to ban SCP-XXXX accounts. This proved inefficient due to the difficulty of detecting SCP-XXXX instances before they could join Facebook groups, after which banning them would trigger their anomalous properties.

Footnotes

1. Examples of past goals include warning labels on books that discuss drug use, designated hours for the chewing of gum, and the banning of bicycle helmets.