I would like to thank all the horrible people who contributed to this mess. Take a bow, 
Kothardarastrix 
leo60228, 
Lt Flops, 
totallynotenby, 
fairydoctor, 
EstrellaYoshte, 
Calibri Bold, 
dimentia, 
Kensing, 
YellowISlol, 
DrWoomywood, 
Koke Ghoul, 
Panda_of_Green, 
Veralta, 
stormfallen, 
basirskipreader, 
Placeholder McD, 
cold_Nights, 
A Mountain, 
Ralliston, Laneous does not match any existing user name, 
CelesteKara, 
Tyumen, 
PlaguePJP, 
barredowl, 
wagyusteak, 
Limeyy, 
pastarasta1, 
Rose the Changeling , 
Doggol, 
Westrin, 
JakdragonX, 
Hexick, 
Drblackbox
/* source: http://ah-sandbox.wikidot.com/component:collapsible-sidebar-x1 */
#top-bar .open-menu a {
position: fixed;
top: 0.5em;
left: 0.5em;
z-index: 5;
font-family: 'Nanum Gothic', san-serif;
font-size: 30px;
font-weight: 700;
width: 30px;
height: 30px;
line-height: 0.9em;
text-align: center;
border: 0.2em solid #888;
background-color: #fff;
border-radius: 3em;
color: #888;
}
@media (min-width: 768px) {
.mobile-top-bar {
display: block;
}
.mobile-top-bar li {
display: none;
}
#main-content {
max-width: 708px;
margin: 0 auto;
padding: 0;
transition: max-width 0.2s ease-in-out;
}
#side-bar {
display: block!important;
position: fixed;
top: 0;
left: -19em;
width: 17em;
height: 100%;
margin: 0;
overflow-y: auto;
z-index: 10;
padding: 0.3em 0.675em;
background-color: rgba(0,0,0,0.1);
transition: left 0.5s ease-in-out;
}
#side-bar:target {
display: block;
left: 0;
width: 17em;
margin: 0;
z-index: 10;
}
#side-bar:target .close-menu {
display: block;
position: fixed;
width: 100%;
height: 100%;
top: 0;
left: 0;
z-index: -1;
}
#top-bar .open-menu a:hover {
text-decoration: none;
}
.close-menu {
margin-left: 19em;
opacity: 0;
}
}
/*
Penumbra Theme
[2020 Wikidot Theme]
By EstrellaYoshte
Based on:
Paperstack Theme by EstrellaYoshte
Ad Astra Theme by NatVoltaic and stormbreath
Inkblot Theme by Croquembouche
Anderson Robotics Theme by Croquembouche
BHL Style Collapsible by Monkatraz
*/
@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Josefin+Sans:wght@700&display=swap');
@import url('https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Roboto&display=swap');
@import url(https://fonts.googleapis.com/css2?family=Fira+Code&display=swap);
#page-content { font-size: .9rem; }
body {
font-family: 'Roboto', sans-serif;
color: #EDEDED;
background-color: #2F333C;
background-image: linear-gradient(
to bottom,
#21252E, #21252E 90px,
#21252E 90px, #2F333C 200px,
#2F333C 200px, #2F333C 100%);
background-repeat: no-repeat;
}
#main-content {
top: -1.2rem;
}
/* ---- SCROLLBAR ---- */
::-webkit-scrollbar {
width: 9px;
background: transparent;
}
::-webkit-scrollbar-track {
background: #21252E;
}
::-webkit-scrollbar-thumb {
background: #ededed;
border: none;
}
::-webkit-scrollbar-thumb:hover {
background: var(--accentColor);
}
/* ---- HEADER ---- */
div#container-wrap {
background-image: none;
}
div#header {
background-image: none;
}
div#extra-div-1 {
height: 164px;
width: 100%;
top: 0;
position: absolute;
background: var(--lgurl);
background-size: contain;
background-repeat: no-repeat;
background-position: 50% 50%;
z-index: -1;
}
#header h1, #header h2 { margin-left: 0; float: none; text-align: center; }
/* Move the subtitle down a smidge */
#header h2 { margin-top: 0.45rem; }
/* Hide the existing text */
#header h1 span, #header h2 span { font-size: 0; display: none; }
/* Style the new text */
#header h1 a::before, #header h2::before {
color: var(--accentColor);
font-family: 'Josefin Sans', sans-serif;
text-shadow: none;
}
/* Set the new text's content from variable */
#header h1 a::before {
content: var(--header-title, "SCP FOUNDATION");
font-weight: 300;
font-size: 1.3em;
}
#header h2::before {
content: var(--header-subtitle, "SECURE - CONTAIN - PROTECT");
font-weight: 600;
font-size: 1.22em;
}
#login-status {
color: #ededed;
}
#login-status a {
color: var(--accentColor);
}
#login-status ul a {
color: #ededed;
background: #21252E;
}
#login-status ul a:hover {
color: var(--accentColor);
}
#account-topbutton{
border: solid 1px var(--accentColor);
}
#footer, #footer a {
background: transparent;
color: #ededed;
}
#license-area {
color: #ededed;
}
#search-top-box {
top: 2.2rem!important;
right: 8px;
}
#search-top-box-form > input[type=submit] {
border: solid 1px #ededed;
background: #21252E!important;
box-shadow: none;
border-radius: 0;
color: #ededed;
transition: color 0.15s linear;
}
#search-top-box-form input[type=submit]:hover {
border: solid 1px var(--accentColor);
box-shadow: none;
color: var(--accentColor);
}
#search-top-box-form > input[type=text] { display: none; }
/* ---- TOP BAR ---- */
#top-bar {
top: 8.4rem;
display: flex;
justify-content: center;
right: 0;
}
@media (max-width: 768px) {
.mobile-top-bar {
display: flex;
justify-content: center;
max-width: 100%;
width: 100%;
left: 0;
}
}
#top-bar, #top-bar a {
color: #ededed;
transition: color 0s;
}
#top-bar ul li ul {
border-color: var(--accentColor);
overflow: hidden;
}
#top-bar ul li.sfhover ul li a,
#top-bar ul li:hover ul li a {
border-top-color: #2F333C;
}
#top-bar ul li.sfhover a,
#top-bar ul li:hover a {
background: #21252E;
color: #ededed;
}
#top-bar ul li.sfhover a:hover,
#top-bar ul li:hover a:hover {
background: #21252E; /* top bar hover background color */
color: var(--accentColor);
transition: color 0.1s linear;
}
/* ---- SIDE BAR ---- */
div#side-bar{
background: #21252E;
clear: both;
padding: .8em;
border-radius: 0;
box-shadow: none;
overflow-x: hidden;
}
#side-bar .heading{
color: #ededed;
font-family: 'Josefin Sans', sans-serif;
font-size: 0.94rem;
border-bottom: solid 1px #ededed;
}
#side-bar .side-block {
border: transparent;
border-radius: 0;
box-shadow: none;
background-color: #21252E;
}
#side-bar .side-block.media {
background-color:#21252E;
}
#side-bar .side-block.media > * {
display: flex;
justify-content: space-evenly;
}
#side-bar .side-block.resources {
background-color:#21252E;
}
.side-block .menu-item > .image {
display: none;
}
#top-bar div.open-menu a {
border-radius: 0;
box-shadow: none;
color: var(--accentColor);
background-color: #21252E;
border: solid 1px #21252E;
}
@media (max-width: 767px) {
#main-content {
padding: 0;
margin: 0 5%;
border-left: none;
}
#page-title {
margin-top: 0.7em;
}
#side-bar {
background-color: #21252E;
left: -18.6em;
}
#side-bar:target {
border: none;
box-shadow: none;
}
#side-bar .close-menu {
transition: width 0.5s ease-in-out 0.1s,
opacity 1s ease-in-out 0s;
display: block;
position: fixed;
width: 100%;
height: 100%;
top: 0;
right: 0;
background: rgba(0,0,0,0.3);
background-position: 18.6em 50%;
z-index: -1;
opacity: 0;
pointer-events: none;
}
#side-bar:target .close-menu {
width: calc(100% - 18.6em);
right: 0;
left: auto;
opacity: 1;
pointer-events: auto;
}
#side-bar:target .close-menu:hover {
background: unset;
}
#page-content > hr, #page-content > .list-pages-box > .list-pages-item > hr {
margin: 3em -5.5%;
}
#side-bar {
top: 0;
}
#side-bar .heading {
padding-left: 1em;
margin-left: -1em;
}
#search-top-box {
top: 107px;
}
}
/* ---- TABS ---- */
/* ---- YUI TAB BASE ---- */
.yui-navset .yui-nav a,.yui-navset .yui-navset-top .yui-nav a{background-color:inherit;background-image:inherit}.yui-navset .yui-nav a:hover,.yui-navset .yui-nav a:focus{background:inherit;text-decoration:inherit}.yui-navset .yui-nav .selected a,.yui-navset .yui-nav .selected a:focus,.yui-navset .yui-nav .selected a:hover{color:inherit;background:inherit}.yui-navset .yui-nav,.yui-navset .yui-navset-top .yui-nav{border-color:inherit}.yui-navset li{line-height:inherit}
/* ---- YUI TAB CUSTOMIZATION ----*/
.yui-navset .yui-nav,
.yui-navset .yui-navset-top .yui-nav{
display: flex;
flex-wrap: wrap;
width: calc(100% - .125rem);
margin: 0 auto;
border-color: var(--accentColor);
box-shadow: none;
}
.yui-navset .yui-nav a, /* ---- Link Modifier ---- */
.yui-navset .yui-navset-top .yui-nav a{
color: #ededed;
font-weight: bold;
/* ---- Tab Background Colour | [UNSELECTED] ---- */
background-color: #21252E;
border: unset;
box-shadow: none;
box-shadow: none;
transition: background-color 0.15s linear;
}
.yui-navset .yui-nav a:hover,
.yui-navset .yui-nav a:focus{
color: #ededed;
/* ---- Tab Background Colour | [HOVER] ---- */
background-color: var(--accentColor);
}
.yui-navset .yui-nav li, /* ---- Listitem Modifier ---- */
.yui-navset .yui-navset-top .yui-nav li{
position: relative;
display: flex;
flex-grow: 2;
max-width: 100%;
margin: 0;
padding: 0;
color: #ededed;
background-color: #21252E;
border-color: transparent;
box-shadow: none;
}
.yui-navset .yui-nav li a,
.yui-navset-top .yui-nav li a,
.yui-navset-bottom .yui-nav li a{
display: flex;
align-items: center;
justify-content: center;
width: 100%;
}
.yui-navset .yui-nav li em{
border: unset;
}
.yui-navset .yui-nav a em,
.yui-navset .yui-navset-top .yui-nav a em{
padding: .35em .75em;
text-overflow: ellipsis;
overflow: hidden;
white-space: nowrap;
}
.yui-navset .yui-nav .selected, /* ---- Selection Modifier ---- */
.yui-navset .yui-navset-top .yui-nav .selected{
flex-grow: 2;
margin: 0;
padding: 0;
/* ---- Tab Background Colour | [SELECTED] ---- */
background-color: var(--accentColor);
}
.yui-navset .yui-nav .selected a,
.yui-navset .yui-nav .selected a em{
border: none;
}
.yui-navset .yui-nav .selected a{
width: 100%;
color: #21252E;
font-weight: bold;
}
.yui-navset .yui-nav .selected a:focus,
.yui-navset .yui-nav .selected a:active{
color: #21252E;
background-color: var(--accentColor);
}
.yui-navset .yui-content {
background-color: #21252E;
box-shadow: none;
}
.yui-navset .yui-content,
.yui-navset .yui-navset-top .yui-content{
padding: .5em;
border: none;
}
/*---- TAB ANIMATION by Croquembouche ---- */
.yui-navset .yui-content > div {
display: block;
top: 0;
overflow: hidden;
transform-origin: 0 0;
}
#page-content .yui-navset .yui-content > div[style*="none"] {
display: block !important;
flex: 0;
max-height: 0;
padding: 0 0.5em;
border-width: 0;
/* The following transition affects the one that DISAPPEARS */
transition: padding 0s linear 0.5s,
border-width 0s linear 0.5s,
flex 0.5s cubic-bezier(.18,.51,.54,.9) 0s;
animation: tab-disappear 0.5s ease-in-out 0s 1 both;
}
#page-content .yui-navset .yui-content > div[style*="block"] {
display: block !important;
flex: 1;
max-height: 9999rem;
/* The following transition affects the one that APPEARS */
transition: padding 0s linear 0.5s,
border-width 0s linear 0.5s,
flex 0.5s cubic-bezier(.18,.51,.54,.9) 0.5s;
animation: tab-appear 0.5s ease-in-out 0.5s 1 both;
}
@keyframes tab-disappear {
0% { max-height: 9999rem; }
1% { max-height: 100vh; }
100% { max-height: 0; }
}
@keyframes tab-appear {
0% { max-height: 0; }
99% { max-height: 100vh; }
100% { max-height: 9999rem; }
}
/* ---- INFO BAR ---- */
body{
--barColour: #21252E;
--linkColour: #ededed;
}
.info-container .collapsible-block-content{
padding: 0 .5em 30px;
}
.info-container .collapsible-block-content .wiki-content-table{
width: 100%;
}
/* Ayer's info-bar patch by Monkatraz */
#page-content .info-container .collapsible-block-folded, #page-content .info-container .collapsible-block-unfolded-link {
width: 100%;
max-width: 100%;
margin: 0 auto;
padding: 0;
box-shadow: none;
}
#page-content .info-container .collapsible-block-link::before, #page-content .info-container .collapsible-block-unfolded-link::before {
content: " ";
display: none;
}
#page-content .info-container .collapsible-block-content::after {
display: none;
}
/* ---- INFO PANE ---- */
#page-content .creditRate{
margin: unset;
margin-top: 4px;
margin-bottom: 4px;
margin-right: 3px;
}
#page-content .rate-box-with-credit-button {
background-color: #21252E;
border: solid 2px #21252E;
border-radius: 0;
box-shadow: 3px 0px 0px 0px var(--accentColor);
}
#page-content .rate-box-with-credit-button .creditButton p a {
border-left-color: transparent;
}
#page-content .rate-box-with-credit-button .page-rate-widget-box .cancel {
border-radius: 0;
}
#page-content .rate-box-with-credit-button .page-rate-widget-box .rate-points {
border-left: 0;
}
.rate-box-with-credit-button .page-rate-widget-box .cancel a:hover {
border-radius: 0;
}
#page-content .rate-box-with-credit-button .fa-info {
color: #ededed;
}
#page-content .rate-box-with-credit-button .fa-info:hover {
color: var(--accentColor);
}
#page-content .creditButtonStandalone p a {
background-color: #21252E;
border: solid 2px #21252E;
border-radius: 0;
box-shadow: 3px 0px 0px 0px var(--accentColor);
color: #ededed;
}
#page-content .creditButtonStandalone p a:hover {
color: var(--accentColor);
}
#page-content .modalbox {
background: #2F333C !important;
color: #ededed;
box-shadow: none;
}
.close-credits,
.credit-back {
filter: grayscale(100%) invert(100%) contrast(275%);
}
/* ---- PAGE RATING ---- */
.page-rate-widget-box {
margin: unset;
border-radius: 0;
border: solid 2px #21252E;
box-shadow: 3px 0px 0px 0px var(--accentColor);
background-color: #21252E;
margin-top: 4px;
margin-bottom:4px;
margin-right: 3px;
}
.page-rate-widget-box .rate-points {
background-color: #21252E !important;
border: none;
color: #ededed !important;
text-transform: capitalize;
}
.page-rate-widget-box .rateup,
.page-rate-widget-box .ratedown {
background-color: #21252E;
border-top: none;
border-bottom: none;
}
.page-rate-widget-box .rateup a,
.page-rate-widget-box .ratedown a {
background: transparent;
color: #ededed;
}
.page-rate-widget-box .rateup a:hover,
.page-rate-widget-box .ratedown a:hover {
background: #21252E;
color: var(--accentColor);
}
.page-rate-widget-box .cancel {
background: transparent;
background-color: #21252E;
border: none;
}
.page-rate-widget-box .cancel a {
color: #ededed;
}
.page-rate-widget-box .cancel a:hover {
background: #21252E;
color: var(--accentColor);
}
/* ---- PAGE ELEMENTS ---- */
.page-source, tt{
font-family: "Fira Code", monospace;
font-size: 0.87rem;
}
.code pre, .code p, .code {
font-family: "Fira Code", monospace;
font-size: 0.87rem;
color: #21252E;
}
h1 {
color: var(--accentColor);
font-family: 'Josefin Sans', sans-serif;
font-weight: bold;
}
h2,
h3,
h4,
h5,
h6 {
color: #EDEDED;
font-family: 'Josefin Sans', sans-serif;
font-weight: bold;
}
#page-title {
color: #ededed;
font-family: 'Josefin Sans', sans-serif;
font-size: 1.65rem;
text-align: center;
border-color: #ededed;
}
/* Clicky links */
a,
a.newpage,
a:visited,
#side-bar a:visited {
color: var(--accentColor);
transition: color 0.15s linear;
}
a:hover, a.newpage:hover, a:visited:hover, #side-bar a:visited:hover {
color: #ffffff;
text-decoration: none;
background-color: var(--accentColor);
}
a.newpage { filter: hue-rotate(180deg); }
/* patch for sidebar media, collapsibles, ACS, info button and ayers module so link doesn't override */
#page-content .collapsible-block-folded a:hover, #page-content .collapsible-block-unfolded-link a:hover, #page-content .rate-box-with-credit-button .fa-info:hover, #side-bar .side-block.media a:hover, .danger-diamond a:hover {
background: transparent;
}
.info-container .collapsible-block-folded .collapsible-block-link, .info-container .collapsible-block-link {
background: var(--linkColour) !important;
}
hr{
background-color: var(--accentColor);
}
blockquote,
div.blockquote,
#toc {
background-color: #21252E;
border: solid 2px #2F333C;
box-shadow: -3px 0px 0px -0.1px var(--accentColor);
}
.code {
background-color: #F8F8F8;
border: solid 3px #2F333C;
box-shadow: none;
}
.scp-image-block {
border: solid 8px #21252E;
border-bottom: solid 0px #21252E;
box-shadow: 0px 0.26rem 0px 0px var(--accentColor);
box-sizing: border-box;
}
.scp-image-block .scp-image-caption {
background-color: #21252E;
border: solid 4px #21252E;
color: #ededed;
font-size: 0.84rem;
}
.scp-image-block.block-left { margin-left: 0; }
.scp-image-block.block-right { margin-right: 0; }
@media (max-width: 540px) {
.scp-image-block.block-left, .scp-image-block.block-right {
float: none; clear: both; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;
}
}
#page-content .wiki-content-table tr th {
border: solid 1px var(--accentColor);
color: var(--accentColor);
background-color: #21252E;
/* set border for table title */
}
#page-content .wiki-content-table tr td {
border: solid 1px var(--accentColor);
/* set border for table content */
}
/* fancy collapsible */
#page-content .collapsible-block-folded, #page-content .collapsible-block-unfolded-link {
background: #21252E;
transition: background 0.25s linear;
padding-top: 0.5rem;
padding-bottom: 0.5rem;
padding-left: 1rem;
padding-right: 1rem;
width: min-content;
white-space: nowrap;
overflow: hidden;
margin: auto;
box-sizing: border-box;
}
#page-content .collapsible-block-folded .collapsible-block-link::before {
content: "▷ ";
}
#page-content .collapsible-block-unfolded .collapsible-block-link::before {
content: "▽ ";
}
#page-content .collapsible-block-link {
text-decoration: none;
color: #ededed;
font-weight: bold;
}
#page-content .collapsible-block-folded:hover, #page-content .collapsible-block-unfolded-link:hover {
background: var(--accentColor);
}
#page-content .collapsible-block-unfolded-link {
box-shadow: 0px -0.26rem 0px 0px var(--accentColor);
}
#page-content .collapsible-block-folded, #page-content .collapsible-block-unfolded-link {
margin-top: 10px;
margin-bottom: 10px;
}
/* Selection */
::selection {
background: var(--accentColor);
color: #ffffff;
}
/* Footnotes */
.hovertip {
font-size: .9rem;
background-color: #21252E !important;
border: solid 1px var(--accentColor) !important;
}
.footnotes-footer {
background-color: #21252E;
padding-left: 1.4rem;
padding-right: 1.4rem;
padding-bottom: 1.5rem;
box-shadow: -0.24rem 0px 0px 0px var(--accentColor);
}
.footnotes-footer .title {
color: #ededed;
}
.footnote .f-footer, .equation .e-footer, .reference .r-footer {
display: none;
}
/* Tags */
#main-content .page-tags a {
margin-top: .18rem;
}
.page-tags span {
border-top: 1px solid #ededed;
}
/* Pop-Up Windows */
.owindow {
background-color: #21252E;
border-color: var(--accentColor);
}
.owindow .modal-header {
background-color: #21252E;
}
.owindow .modal-body img {
background-color: transparent !important;
}
.owindow .title {
background-color: #21252E;
color: #var(--accentColor);
border-bottom: 1px solid #2F333C;
}
.owindow .button-bar a {
background-color: #21252E;
border-color: var(--accentColor);
color: #ededed;
}
.owindow .button-bar a:hover {
background-color: var(--accentColor);
}
/* Edit Buttons */
.buttons .btn {
background-color: #21252E;
border-color: var(--accentColor);
color: var(--accentColor);
padding: 3px 5px;
}
.buttons .btn:hover {
background-color: var(--accentColor);
color: #21252E;
}
/* Edit Lock Info*/
#lock-info {
background-color: #21252E;
border-color: #ededed;
}
/* Close Button for Page Source, Rating, Etc */
a.action-area-close:hover {
background-color: #21252E;
}
/* Page-History Current */
.pager .current {
background-color: var(--accentColor);
border-color: #ededed;
}
/* History Compare */
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You find the access tunnel, hidden within a Woody's a mile off the main road.
You don't need the keycard. The door is absolutely fabulous.
It smells here. It smells like /them//. Hopefully, they've moved on. You've come so far already. You can't turn back now.
There is a sparkling, shining trail of glitter that leads from the cave entrance and into the depths of the site. If it's holographic or iridescent - or if it's party body-paint, you cannot tell. You make a point to avoid it.
You're still receiving the distress signal. Whoever it is - you pray they're still straight.
The trail takes you to a backroom near the VIP lounge - the source of the signal. Within, there's a desk with a computer atop it. Approaching the terminal, you can clearly see the blinking light of the power button.
You take a seat. Turn it on. ;)
Party Protocol Activated. Inhibitions Removed. Full Access Granted. *wink*
Super. Crazy. Pizazz.
Loading...
Loading..
Loading...
Loading..
Loading...
Loading..
You hear footsteps just outside the door. Every first step comes down heavy, the second drags behind it. Can you feel it, Mr. Krabs?
Loading...
Loading..
Loading...
Loading..
Loading...
Loading..
Loading...
Loading..
Loading...
Authenticating...
..
...
A colorful shape blots out the light streaming in through the slit between the floor and the doorway. It is radiating rainbow sex energy.
..
...
..
Authenticating...
..
...
..
...
..
Authenticating...
..
...
You tense up, waiting with bated breath, praying it will pass, focusing on straight thoughts, like baseball and carpentry.
Please Wait...
..
...
..
...
..
Please Wait...
..
...
..
Please Wait...
..
...
..
The shadow recedes. You breathe a sigh of relief just as the screen comes to life…
WHEN SUDDENLY, A CATGIRL JUMPS OUT OF THE WALL AND NYAAS ALL UP IN YOUR SPACE. YOU CLOCK HER IN THE FACE.
With the threat neutralized, you continue.
Opening File
🏳️🌈 AUTOMATED SECURE SYSTEM NOTIFICATION CODE 235 (ASSN-235) 🏳️🌈
There has been an error in retrieving the current iteration of the SCP-0w01 file but we're here to help. You are currently viewing revision #3, honey. Newer revisions can be accessed at the bottom of this page.
[[collapsible show="Access File: SCP-001 Revision #3/12: (1) Audio File" hide="Hide Revision"]]
Revision 3/12 updated 1312 days ago
SCP-001, minutes after its activation. We don't get it either.
Item #: SCP-0w01
OwObject Cwass: Apowwyon
Special Containment Pwocedures: Due to its nature, SCP-0w01 cannot be contained. Survivors of the SCP-0w01 event stationed within secure facilities are the final shining light of heteronormativity and should be protected at all costs. Personnel are encouraged to attempt to reach Site-5 Site-19 via the most orientation-reaffirming means possible. Penny farthings are out of the question.
Survivors attempting to travel outdoors must fully cover their bodies in drab clothing; preferably several layers. Cities - and man-made structures in general - belong to them now. Travel by air is preferable above all other methods but do be sure to avoid the double-rainbows.
Personnel exposed to SCP-0w01 are to be considered lost. Compromised personnel are to be abandoned.
Y'all really need to stop acting like this is a death sentence lmao
SCP-001 is the designation given to the Sun, after it spread the gay.
A member of the gay discovered at night.
Please insert your thought, opinions, banking information, survival accounts, shitposts and recipes below. Do not under any circumstances edit another's contribution or blank the page, goddamnit.
SCP-001 functions as a metapataphysical noothaumaturgispherical level, resulting in the construction of massive migraine constructs in the heads of all who attempt to comprehend its luscious lock(e)s of beautiful hair.
In addition, any personnel that attempts to look at the lockes turns into a catgirl. No, this cannot be reversed. No, you cannot have a "nya nya catgirl uwu" voice permanently. No— Why are you people willingly going into the light?
History: Shortly after its initial manifestation, a subject was shown to not have their sexuality influenced by it and just got skin cancer. This was originally thought to be somebody sustaining their heterosexuality, but in reality they were asexual. It's fine; we administered garlic bread and gave them a poncho so they could traverse into the rainbow freely. We're really scared to know what it does to bi people but it has been established it [DATA EXPUNGED] to already gay people. As well, in many places, trans people have been crowned as Kings, Queens, and Non-binary Solar Regents.
Do not test on bi people. Accidentally opened the curtains three weeks ago and my hands are stuck doing finger guns to this day.
Affected Anomalies: Anomalies affected by SCP-OwO1 are listed below.
| Relevant Anomaly |
Effect |
| SCP-682 |
Did not like the acid bath due to its heterosexuality |
| SCP-999 |
No effect as SCP-999 is wholesome and loves EVERYBODY. |
| SCP-173 |
The colorful substance on the floor of SCP-173's chamber is a combination of feces, blood, and rainbow dust. |
| SCP-230 |
No effect. |
| SCP-009-j |
No effect. |
| SCP-527 |
Subject is now even more fabulous than before |
| SCP-2747 |
DATA LOST |
| SCP-031 |
Shows it's true form. Damn it's sexy. |
| Your Mom |
Still morbidly obese. Did you really expect anything to change? |
ADDENDUM 001-OMEGA-WHISKEY-OMEGA: The following are some journal entries we found somewhere. Where? That's not important. When has that EVER been important???
JOURNAL ENTRY #1
I have locked myself in the Absolute Deliciousness Smoothie Machine. I don't think anyone can see me, all they see is these bomb ass smoothies.
From what I have gathered, gay has broke. The skylights in Site-06 opened, and all super rainbow rays shined in. I managed to shove myself in this smoothie machine before they asked me if it was "party rockers" or "party rock is". All I must do now is wait…
JOURNAL ENTRY #2
Oh fuck me, I just got this message on my phone. It played a little 1273 Rockefeller Street jingle, and NOT the dentist kind.
The following is a message composed via consensus of the HIGH5 Council.
For those who are not currently aware of our existence, we represent the organization known as the SCP Foundation. Our previous mission centered around the containment and study of anomalous objects, entities and cool looking ceramic frogs. This mission was the focus of our organization for more than one-hundred years.
Due to circumstances outside of our control, this directive has now changed. Our new mission is to be gay and do crimes.
There will be no further communication.
They just sent this to every governm—
Wait, is this the wrong article? This is the sun one, not The Suit… uhh, I'll see myself out, sorry.
ADDENDUM [insert SCP designation here]: Firsthand encounters with instances of SCP-001-0w0 were recorded seven minutes after the initiation of the SCP-001-0w0-WAVE event.
LOCATION: Site-114355225
INVOLVED: Dr. Christian, MTF Xi-9 ("Oh No")
[BEGIN LOG]
[The bodycam on Xi-9-1 fizzles and the view focuses on the entrance tunnel to Site-114355225. Outside, sporadic rainbow rays and sparkles rain down onto the land. Screams and distant "nyas" are audible. Dr. Christian slowly walks into view.]
CHRISTIAN: Oh, by the Heavens. No…
XI-9-1: This is the end, isn't it, sir?
[Dr. Christian turns to face Xi-9-1. He begins to tear up and whines like a child.]
CHRISTIAN: Not — not like this. I still had so much to share — so much to bring my boys back from this. I knew it — catgirls —
[Xi-9-2 cautiously approaches Dr. Christian. Dr. Christian, still sobbing, notices Xi-9-2 and smiles, opening his arms towards him.]
CHRISTIAN: I'm so sorry, Braden. So sorry for your lo —
[Xi-9-2 punches Dr. Christian. Dr. Christian falls onto the ground, and dies instantly. Xi-9-2 slowly approaches the light, and turns around to the rest of Xi-9.]
XI-9-2: I ain't going back. I want to be free.
[Xi-9-2 spreads his arms out slowly, walks backwards into the light, and intentionally falls back onto the ground like a dumbfuck.]
XI-9-2: Oof.
[Xi-9-2 undergoes [REDACTED] to become an instance of SCP-001-0w0.]
SCP-001-0w0: Nya —
[Xi-9 immediately unleashes an artillery barrage on the instance. The camera fizzles out.]
[END LOG]
AFTERWORD: Fuck — O5-1
Observation Log SCP-0w01-1
The following is a log of an SCP-0w01-1 instance as observed by Learning Computer Psi-2 in a game of Among Us. The SCP-0w01-1 instance participated in the game without communicating until specifically addressed by other players. Following the game, all participating players were tracked down and treated as containment procedures dictate.
Communication is logged below:
<Begin Log>
JonArbucle: red, where were you when we were doing reactor?
SCP-0w01-1: Where was I?
SCP-0w01-1: Well, for starters, I was fucking your dad.
JonArbucle: seriously red where were you
SCP-0w01-1: I just said I was fucking your dad.
JonArbucle: NO i mean, in the game
SCP-0w01-1: Both in game AND in real life.
JonArbucle: What tasks did you have.
SCP-0w01-1: Well. Funnily enough I only had one task, and I did it. Which was fucking your dad.
JonArbucle: vote red hes trolling.
SCP-0w01-1: Ugh, fine. I'm guilty.
(No activity for five seconds.)
SCP-0w01-1: Guilty of fucking your dad.
your mom: wait what
<End Log>
ADDENDUM SCP-0w01-I don't even know anymore: Defense Methods
If you are exposed to SCP-001, just say "NO!". SCP-001 cannot legally affect you if you don't want it to.
Email Exchange
Look at this researcher embarrassing himself in front of O5-1 by living in the wrong timezone! Make sure to laugh at him next time you see him.
To: O5-1
From: Dr. Cruz
Message: Isn't April Fools' tomorrow?
To: Dr. Cruz
From: O5-1
Message: imagine being american lmao
NIGHTMARE ADDENDUM 001-RED DELTA ECHO ALPHA DELTA
oh god it's even got little subtext
At the approximate time of SCP-001's inception, multiple transmissions were broadcasted, sourced from the elusive frog tunnels of New York. The following is a general translation of this frog communication:
<BEGIN LOG>
FROG 1: PREPARE! PREPARE!
FROG 2: FLIES NEEDED! FLIES! FLIES! FLIES!
FROG 1: THE SEWERS SHALL BE SAFE… THE SEWERS! THE SEWERS! THE SEWERS!
FROG 3: NO… IT CANT BE! THE… THE WATER!
FROG 1: THE CHEMICALS!
(Assorted frog transformation noises.)
FROG 1: Alright bitches. You know what to do next.
ALL FROGS THROW ALEX JONES INTO THE VAT! THE VAT! THE VAT! THE VAT!
(Frog clamoring. Fade into static, but like, really cool static.)
<END LOG>
ADDENDUM 0w01-##: During the ensuing events of SCP-0w0's activation, former Home Alone 2: Lost In New York actor Donald Trump was able to return to the Twitter social media website under a different account. A log of all this account's activity has been logged below.
Donald J. Trump @realerDonaldTrump
Terrible Sun out today! Radical Joe "Antifa Karl Marx 1984" Biden's Green New Deal destroyed the economy with rainbow fumes. Sad!
1 April 2021 - Florida, United States
Donald J. Trump @realerDonaldTrump
The antifa frogs have STOLEN this country with their water chemicals, just like Sleepy Joe has STOLEN the election. My ADMINISTRATION vaccinated the people! We even vaccinated the Sun! FACT!
1 April 2021 - Florida, United States
Donald J. Trump @realerDonaldTrump
PUSH THE SUN SOMEWHERE ELSE!
1 April 2021 - Florida, United States
In case none of the above made you piss out your soul, here's Beanman. Sweet dreams.
I just made out with my girlfriend!
AND WE'RE BOTH LESBIANS!
So true!
— Dr. Chelsea Owle
If being gay was a crime
I'd fuck your mom.
and do crimes lol
YOOO NEW YUGIOH CARD JUST DROPPED GUYS LOOK!!!
- researcher rowan raster
Personnel are to be reminded that even in times of peril, below the footnotes is not place for rabble rousing. Further such actions will result in a stern pointing at while repeating the word "YOU" over and over again.
— Site Director Gronson VonGronson
no youre fat and also ugly
-doctor hot sex
that was not me… that was not the REAL doctor sex! the real doctor sex uses emdashes! there is an impostor among u—
— doctor sex
Yo we still using CSS to talk about this lmao
- A very concerned, anonymous researcher at Site-25525151515, Human Resources Department Employee, Dr. Yervens
World might be ending but that penumbra aesthetic slaps and we gotta appreciate it.
- Dr J0w0nes
hewwo its me, an scp-0w01 instance, pwease come out hewe, we have fwee food and dwinks out hewe, come gwomp with us under the wainbow uwu <3 :3 owo
Sometimes I lie awake at night thinking about how much better my life would have been if I had just taken the university job instead of this.
-Dr. Gears
SCP-5074 regarding SCP-0w01 with disdain, before neutralizing it with its laser vision.
NOTE FOR WRITERS: This piece was meant as a punchline for the page overall. Try to make your edits above it.
[[colapsible show= SUPER SECRET HIDDEN COOLAPSIBLE]]
oh fuck, do you not think this was funni? shit. my bad. I should try to be more classy next time.
[[END HIDDEN COLLAPSIBLE]]
[[colapsible show= SUPER SECRET HIDDEN COOLAPSIBLE]]
what the actual fuck is going on lmao
- Dr sex
[[END HIDDEN COLLAPSIBLE
hi there, have a cookie <3
Hey guys, John Cookie here just making this PSA THAT YOU WILL NEVER EVER HAVE ME NOT IN A MILLION YEARS KEEP YOUR SLIMY GRIMEY FINGIES A W A Y FROM MY DELICIOUS CHOCOLATEY CHIP THEYRE MINE AND NO ONE WILL HAVE THEM! MY OOEY GOOEY RICH INNARDS ARE FOR ME TO ENJOY ALONE! YOU HEAR ME?!?! Anyways that's all I had to say, have a good one :)
~ Love, John Cookie XOXO
there is nothing to be seen
if being cool was a crime i'd be arrested for mistreating anomalies and numerous other crimes against humanity done under the excuse of working for a foundation protecting it
— daniel asheworth, formerly site-120 director council chairman
may god have mercy on our souls
This is considerably, considerably, not stonks, non? Aviatica will ensure that it finds out the truth about this whole ruckus.
escriter
we haven't found it yet, but we'll never gonna give it up, never gonna let our readers down, never gonna run around and desert the truth
boop! -Dr. Fairy
u all laughed at me when i implanted the anti-sunbeam filter in my visual nerves, u said i was crazy and stupid, but who is laughing now and - wait, something's wrong, this is not r-right nnnnooooooooooooooooooooyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
I, Fleshblob
I really fucking enjoyed being melted into a still-conscious animate biomass.
Addendum NSFW: Thousands of gays attack several Foundation facilities, stealing many SCPs such as SCP-113 and SCP-686. Where there current location is unknown. However, many personnel at such facilities have been effected by SCP-113, SCP-686 and SCP-0W01 simultaneously, resulting in [REDACTED].
Note: OMFG THIS IS NSFW! REDACT IT NOW!!! -Dr. Rainbow
Note From Doctor Freeguy: All your gays are belong to us. (funni half-life joke!!!1!)
NOTE FROM THE O5 COUNCIL, ALL PERSONNEL MUST SEE:
Note from Doctor Pam Bulance: This is fucking disgusting. An absolutely appalling affront against both what the Foundation stands for and the very essence of everything good and holy. I have not seen such a sorry sight in literal decades, and I am enraged that the concept of this even came into this previously pristine world. For the literal buffoons that don't know what I'm talking about, it's fuCKING CALLED AMONG US, IT'S NOT AMOGUS YOU CLOWN, IT'S CALLED AMONG US! WHAT EVEN IS "AMOGUS", AND WHY IS EVERYONE LITERALLY NOT ABLE TO UNDERSTAND HOW THE NAME OF A SPACE BEAN GAME IS SPELLED!?! WHY IS THIS SO DIFFICULT FOR YOU??? WHY DOES THIS BASIC CONCEPT OF GRAMMAR NOT EXIST??? WHY ARE THE HONEYCRISP APPLES AT MY LOCAL SUPERMARKET 35% OFF??? DO I NEED TO CALL YOUR PARENTS?!? I WILL FUCKING CALL EVERYONE'S PARENTS TO COMPLAIN IF I SEE AN "amogus" ONE MORE FUCKING TIME!!!
mom
i'm scared
you made it worse it was just supposed to say mom
straight people cant use collapsible confirmed
or maybe its just wikidot
amogus
The CSS Wizards are all gay
turns into a catenby
what is this trickery
the sun is a deadly lazer
get this to 100 so gay will never be unbroken
Will the gay, be unbroken
By and by Locke, by and by
There's a rainbow, sun a-blazing
In the sky Locke, in the sky
The following is a message composed via consensus of the O5 Council.
crabs good 🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀
Per 
