Per 
Item Number SCP-????-J
Object Class Made In China
Special Containment Procedures
SCP-001-J is to be used as a prime example of Chinese robotics and reposted every single time images of it come onto one's social media feed. If one does not receive SCP-001-J on their feed at least once a week they are to contact their respective sites Memetics Department who will then be ordered to distribute viral memetics of SCP-001-J. This is to be done on a permanent basis to prevent another instance of SCP-001-J from ever being made by the Chinese government again.
Description
SCP-001-J is approximately 10 meters tall, made of a low-grade aluminum and plastic, and has an internal clockwork structure made of cardboard. its face is painted in a bizarre mockery of the Nintendo character, Mario who is portrayed with a green mustache. On its chest "iPhone" is scrawled in sloppy letters.
Iterations of SCP-001-J bought online- Known as SCP-001-J-1 have been observed to vary in appearance drastically. Often including iconography for various name brands, cartoon characters, and public figures.
Discovery
SCP-001-J was discovered when Mekhanite members of Site-64s Engineering staff reported Mekhanite technology being used by the Chinese government. Upon investigation, SCP-001-J was discovered to indeed be using a strange reproduction of Mekhanite technology- though so many corners had been cut to make the result unstable.
This is a joke, right? This thing is a nuclear-powered robot made with paper, plastic, and aluminum! This is going to kill anyone who touches it- and that's before it explodes! —Foundational Head Engineer Alex Galin
The Foundation stepped in immediately, buying the robot from China and safely disposing of it. Unfortunately, within a week of the robot going public personnel reported online sites such as Taobao, Wish, and eBay selling identical copies of the robot with varying titles.
Obtained Units of SCP-001-J-1
"Perfection realistic lOve god of bringing refrigeration 4kHD with iPod": A copy of the robot with an Apple iPod glued onto the front of it, iPod was found to be nonfunctional made of wood.
"Make you have new feeling powerful multispeed Texas BBQ": A copy of the robot with [REDACTED] that [REDACTED] BBQ Sauce.
Even though it nearly killed me, the BBQ sauce actually tasted really good, not entirely unlike Rudy’s Rub. — Dr. Sherman
"Superior Obama Pokémon GO CLefairyble precious XD HOLO Foil Card pillow talk.": Upon opening, Dr. Warpstar screamed a flux into reality. It took Dr. Belko 3 hours to calm down Dr. Warpstar and bring hume levels back to normal.
I sent it to the deepest pits of nothing, it was supposed to be a Clefairy doll! — Dr. Warpstar when questioned as to why the robot was nowhere to be found.
"lovely robot china is number one robot is dreamy bend until snap and praise no cheese sandwich": [REDACTED]
Apparently the Initiative considered this one a threat to humanity. — Dr. Niasmith
