shockerdr - Snake Oil Salesman
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Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX must be stored within a standard issue non-hazardous containment locker, at room temperature and away from prolonged exposure to direct sunlight. No cross-application of XXXX-1 through 5 with each other may be conducted unless verified by the Site Director. SCP-XXXX may only be accessed by personnel with Level 4 Security clearance to prevent misapplication.

Description: SCP-XXXX is, at the time of writing, an assortment of three (3) vials each containing approximately 300 ml of liquid with various anomalous properties (hereby referred to as SCP-XXX 1-3). When applied as instructed by it's label, it is often beneficial in some manner to the applicants health.

The same cannot be said for those who do not follow instructions or do not fit the requirements for the liquids use. The end result of faulty application can lead to disfigurement, mutilation, and/or death and thus must only be conducted under strict supervision.

While Foundation analysis has identified one of the key ingredients of the vials formula to be fat contained in several species of Squamata, synthesizing it's other ingredients has failed for the time being.

Addendum-1: SCP-XXXX was in discovered within an abandoned carriage outside the town of ██████████, Arizona in 1902, when rumors of a "skinless man" seen wandering the wilderness began to occur. Though no such person(s) were sighted by Foundation personnel, SCP-XXXX and the carriage it resided in were discovered. Documents within the carriage showed it's owner to be a Dr. Garter, though town officials and medical professionals showed no knowledge of such an individual in or around their town.

The carriage itself was similar in appearance to that of those used in Medicine Shows common at the time, though it had clearly been the target of violence as Foundation investigators found bullet holes in numerous locations along side the vehicle and a broken front wheel. Like before, there hadn't been any awareness of gunfights nearby from the town law nor by citizens.

Follow up testing showed no signs of anomalous properties with the carriage. The carriage and it's contents are preserved in a standard containment block for potential clues towards SCP-XXXX's nature.

Test XXXX - 1: Dr. Garter's Miracle Mamba Moisturizer

Vial Instructions: Tail not growing back fast enough for after run in with our Feral Furred Foes? Underbelly get caught on jagged rocks while basking in the Sensationally Succulent Sun? Not a problem! Apply one teaspoon of my Miracle Mamba Moisturizer to your affliction and watch as it grows back good as new, right before your very eyes!

Subject: D-398. Age: 58. Sex: Male. Subject's left foot missing via gunshot during The Late Unpleasantness.

Results: One (1) teaspoon of XXXX-1 is applied to the area where D-398's foot was removed. Subject notes that it feel like soap bubbles popping on his skin. Regenerative properties kick in at the thirty second mark, with observed formation of nerve and muscle tissue along the stump. Subject does not note any discomfort.

At a minute-thirty (01:30) the regeneration accelerates, and the skeletal make-up of the subject's foot rapidly forms, followed soon after by nerve endings and muscle tissue.

Finally at the two minute-forty second mark (02:40) the foot is completely regrown, with notable yellow scales atop the foot and elongated, curved, toe-nails.

Post-Analysis: At no point did D-398 experience any discomfort with the procedure. Basic exercises showed that aside from understandable unfamiliarity with the recovered appendage and it's inhuman additions, the subject could operate and feel sensations like a normal foot. Future applications look very promising. - Researcher Hunnington

Test XXXX - 2: Dr. Garter's Smoothing Sunbeam Sunscreen

Vial Instructions: Wyrms and Wyverns never fear! No longer do you have to fear ridicule from the fairer sex due to Slowly Shedding Scales! 1 ounce of my amazing Smoothing Sunbeam Sunscreen and you'll find yourself out with the old and in with new! The new You!

Subject: D-489. Age: 24. Sex: Male. 10% of the subject's upper abdomen is covered in scars from attempted arson.

Results: One (1) ounce of XXXX-2 is applied onto D-489's scarred area by himself. Subject notes some discomfort, though he compares it to a particularly strong itch. XXXX-2 begins hardening after two minutes (02:00) have passed.

At three minutes and thirty-five seconds (03:35) D-489 complains of an intense burning sensation. Researchers order D-489 to not remove XXXX-2.

Five minutes (05:00) and XXXX-2 crumbles away from the subject's abdomen. While there are no signs of scarring, there is a noticeable patch of scales surrounded by abnormally white skin.

Post-Analysis: An admittedly less impressive showing from XXXX-2. Interesting, that despite the greater amount required than XXXX-1, it seems to take almost twice as long for a comparatively moderate wound. The pain and mutation it incurs is also disappointing but D-489 has not shown any further complications from the treatment. There still remains some promise. - Researcher Hunnington

Test XXXX - 3: Dr. Garter's Virtuous Viper Virility

Vial Instructions: A quiet burrow is a lonely burrow, that's what the Great Mother told me! For a limited time offer, Wyrms and Wyverns, my amazing Virtuous Viper Virility is the panacea to your ailments! One teaspoon a day for five days and Wyrms will have the energy of a roudy Serpicant! For you Wyvern folk, you'll found yourself blessed by the Great Mother of Mothers with an abundance of Willies for a burrow that they shall soon call home!

[DATA EXPUNGED]

Post-Analysis: After lengthy debate I've convinced the Director and Ethics Committee to allow at least the instructions, and thus the vial's intent, to survive with this document. What happened with those two was… it's not often I do so for D-class personnel, but I can only call it a tragedy. One day retesting for XXX-3 shall be allowed, but not when the sight is still fresh in our minds. - Researcher Hunnington