Per 
WARNING: THE FOLLOWING FILE IS CLASSIFIED
ANY ATTEMPT TO ACCESS THIS FILE WITHOUT AUTHORIZATION WILL BE LOGGED AND WILL LEAD TO IMMEDIATE DISCIPLINARY ACTION. AUDIO LOGS OF THE CONTENTS OF THIS FILE WILL BE DELIVERED TO THE PUBLIC ONCE ALL NECESSARY REDACTION AND CORRECTION IS FINISHED.
YOU'RE ONLY RUINING YOUR OWN LISTENING EXPERIENCE
Good morning all site-██ personnel, I'm your new local announcer, speaking straight out of the wing B recording studio and from tomorrow on out I will be giving you morning announcements, important events, Foundation news and other fun and important things. Please all personnel, do not come in and disturb me while announcing, I would very much appreciate it if you left me to my own devices while I'm working.
Speaking of important events, seeing as I am new here, I can touch on the fact that the foundation keeps recruiting new people all the time, those who were either at the top in their respective fields or just were at the wrong place at the wrong time and saw a bit more than they were supposed to. Good job rejecting the offer of amnestics to those people, you made the right decision. But today specifically site-██ has an exceptional amount of new recruits, which I am very happy for, the more people protecting the world from those great monstrous beings that threaten the existences of the public, the world, the universe and existence itself.
Anyways, to all of you green boys and girls out there excited to start the first day of your lives at the Foundation, the site administrator, Dr Golde has requested I give a standard procedure announcement this fine morning with some of the details about the foundation and what it does in the world. So, here goes nothing.
Let's start with the basics, SCP - Secure. Contain. Protect.
Contrary to what many of you new recruits believe, SCP does not actually stand for Secure Contain Protect, these are simply the three main tenets of the foundation.
We Secure anomalies found around the world, making sure they stay out of the public eye and out of the hands of those who would use them for personal gain.
We Contain those anomalies, making sure to prevent their influence on the outside world by means of relocation, concealment or in the worst case, neutralisation.
We Protect the people of the world from these influences while also protecting the anomalies themselves to make sure they are understood and if possible cured of their anomalous properties or until they are fully understood. Neutralisation is an option only if the anomaly is determined to be too dangerous to contain.
These anomalies that the foundation Secures Contains and Protects are given a designation, you will have most likely already heard someone talk about or read a file on one of the anomalous items and have them be referred to as SCP followed by a number. The items themselves are defined mostly by the ways they are meant to be contained, that is to say, when a file is written on an anomaly, the file is mostly meant to give the reader the Special Containment Procedures (or SCP) necessary to safely contain the anomaly and prevent it from causing harm.
When reading some of these SCPs or SCiPs as they are often referred to, it becomes apparent that description and additional information is more often than not less important than the actual containment procedures needed, this is why you, again, more often than not, find those black bars or the [DATA EXPUNGED] or [REDACTED] bits in item descriptions, this is because either the information has been pulled from the document or your clearance level is simply too low, you are of course allowed to request access to this information. Be sure not to ask for too much access at a time though, the 05 is always watching and they do not like nosy nellies. I hope you could see the intended wink there.
Speaking of clearance levels, they exist, and they are there to make sure you do not see anything you aren't supposed to while working here. They also help in keeping away the people who have not much to do here. Besides clearance levels, we also have Classes, classes? I hear you asking. why yes, personnel classes. Most of you new recruits may find yourself to be a C class personnel member. This rank is given to most personnel and you all are the backbone of this fine facility. Those who are integral to the functioning of this site, those being most high-ranking researchers and the site administrator. An then there is A which is basically only given to the O5 but you don't have to worry about that.
That brings us to the most controversial personnel class, the D-Class. you've most likely heard the stories and those stories are most likely true. D-Class personnel are death row criminals extracted from all over the world, used in cases of testing and when human hands are needed to do some dirty work that cannot be done by any machine. No, D-Class personnel are not terminated at the end of every month, this would be very inefficient. No D-Classes are not sent to their death on purpose, all testing is performed with the necessary safety measures in place to ensure that no harm comes to anyone, although sometimes information is insufficient and accidents happen.
Anyway, what else is there? Oh yes, one last point. Object classes.
SCPs are divided into classes as well, this class determines the difficulty of containment an can be determined easily using something we like to call the "locked box test."
If you put the SCP in a locked box and leave it there and you can be sure that nothing will happen to it, it is classified as SAFE
If you put it in a box and you are unsure of what will happen if you leave it alone, it is classified as EUCLID
If you put it in a box and you are almost certain that it will do anything it can to escape it, it will be classified as KETER
And finally, if the SCP IS the box, it will be classified as THAUMIEL, these SCPs thus aid in the containment of others.
There are also a bunch of sub-categories but we'll not go too much into that right now, it will come up when it comes up.
I think that about sums it up… Yeah, those were the basics. Okay, well, I hope you all learned something new and I wish you all a good day. Tomorrow I will be here for the announcements and the news, so I hope to see you all still here and alive then.
I believe in you all and remember!
We work in the dark so the public may live in the light.
Morning announcement tune
Good morning site-██, My name is… Well, I don't specifically have a name, but you all can refer to me as "The Radio Host". The Foundation has given me the great opportunity to read aloud to all of you wonderful listeners starting your workdays the morning announcements and to report on any further news that might arise during the day. So without any further ado, I'm the radio host, and these are the morning announcements.
Today is [insert date of uploading here] 2020 here at the wonderful site-██. Today's activities include such fun things as cleaning out SCP-173's containment chamber, further testing on the destruction of SCP-682 and 096, Testing on many different subjects in every wing of the facility continues, so basically life as normal.
JINGLE
D-0567 walks down the hallway leading to the containment area, he enters a wide space filled with computers and strange machines that are displaying readings he does not understand. In the centre of the room stands a container, constructed from black metal, relatively small compared to the size of the surrounding area but large enough for several humans to fit inside. On the container are painted numbers in yellow paint, 173 it reads. The D-Class has heard of this number, a voice comes over the intercom telling him what he already knows. Do not look away from the subject, do not blink before warning those standing beside you. Do not run, do not object or face termination.
The large container has a double door controlled from elsewhere, D-0567 stands before it, together with two others. They are given broomsticks and plastic buckets filled with soapy water. The door gives out three loud beeps as they slide open before them.
JINGLE
At lunch today we will be serving pizza, simply touch the pizza box on the serving tray and your favourite pizza will appear, be sure to grab a drink at the vending machine at the east wall, select a drink from the list and enjoy, selecting a drink not featured on the list will be seen as a breach of contract and will lead to termination. For those who dislike pizza, please make your way over to the kitchen area where you can find a recipe for a meatloaf dish, don't worry though all you vegan personnel out there cooking this recipe always results in a meat-free dish.
The site administrator has asked me to tell you that if you are unhappy with the provided food options, you should bring your own food. Stop complaining about free food you overpaid [DATA EXPUNGED].
JINGLE
A nurse walks through a hallway on her way to the infirmary, when she enters, not much is happening. The doctor is calmly walking towards the medical cabinet. Passing by, the doctor says, "you must be Eveline, we have a patient, you can wait in the operating room until I get my stuff."
A D-Class is laying to the room, he is bleeding heavily from the neck as if something rough tried to snap it but failed. The patient lies there as the nurse pleads for him to look at her. a faint, "I can't" is heard. The doctor decides on a blood transfer, blood type B+. The reserves are empty, a donor is needed, no one fitting is near.
The nurse runs to the closet, grabs a compass and starts following it. She is lead in front of an office, the sign next to the door reads Dr From, ON-SITE REALITY BENDING EXPERT. The nurse thinks and the nurse looks away, the nurse does not enter the office.
JINGLE
Hey there Foundation personnel, do you know anyone smart? Do you know a person of whom you'd think, "He or She would fit right into the foundation, they could accomplish such greatness."
The Foundation asks you to recommend those people for a job as a Foundation researcher. We are always open for more help protecting those who are not able to protect themselves through research and innovation. So hey, talk to your HR-department today and enlist your fellow man for the greater good.
JINGLE
The nurse enters the Anomalous Items Storage wing, the nurse looks down at her compass, it points forward. She follows. The nurse runs, she has been running for a while now. she stops in front of a door, inside she finds rows upon rows of safes and cabinets, she passes one, the compass turns around, she stands in front of it as the compass starts spinning erratically. Inside lies a blood bag labelled Type-X. She takes it and returns.
JINGLE
To those new here at the foundation, please be advised that any SCP that is seen roaming throughout site-██ that is not listed on document SCP-SFR should be reported to personnel of class B or higher. Examples of more obvious items that are allowed to roam the halls of the facility are SCP-999, a big slimeball that you should give a hug when you see it or SCP-131, small pods with one large eye in the middle who are friendly and aid in case of danger.
JINGLE
Dear Foundation personnel, the O5-council asks that whenever a new batch of D-Class personnel is hired to please thoroughly check their background information. A recent incident involving a blind D-Class being assigned to the cleaning of SCP- 173's containment unit has lead to multiple deaths including those of higher class personnel. Failure to sufficiently check will result in your termination. You have been warned. This specific D-Class died in the infirmary from bloodloss while doctors were searching for a donor.
Thank you for listening to this episode of Site-██, we appreciate it a lot.
Site-██ was written by Max Mouling.
The Radio Host was also voiced by Max Mouling.
All SCPs used in this episode will be listed on the podcast hub on the wiki.
The SCP-wiki, logo and its works are licensed under CC Sharealike 3.0 and all concepts originate from www.scp-wiki.net.
