- Welcome
- Cursed to walk the world for eternity and then some
- Orange Acid Cloud
- Snake Oil Salesman's Physicsless Physics textbook
- Snake Oil Salesman's "Hit 'em from anywhere ball"
- Bone Stripper
- Ouroboros Protocol
Welp, you found me.
If you're here from the critique forum, The "Ouroboros Protocol" is the one I need feedback on, the others are Ideas in progress. Feel free to look around though!
Item #: SCP-XXXX
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures:
SCP-XXXX is extremely suicidal and should be monitored at all hours. Guards should be stationed outside the door at least 12 hours a day. The man is very suicidal and will do anything within his power to have the chance of dying or being killed. Lethal force is not recommended as its effects hinders future research.
SCP-XXXX is prone to long bouts of depression, during these times he is to be administered 20 Milligrams of ███████ Prescription Antidepressants twice per day, by instructions described on prescription.
Full destruction testing has ended as of 17-6-████
Description:
SCP-XXXX is a human male standing at 1.6 meters and weighing 51 Kilograms. The subject possesses immortality, but does not possess invincibility. Due to this, the subject is able to regenerate limbs, and organs, though at an extremely slow. The subject cannot die from his injuries.
It takes approximately 300 days to regenerate a full body from complete destruction. SCP-XXXX retains its memories from previous generations and is capable of making new memories after 13 days, at which point the brain is mostly formed.
Addendum:
The subject claims his name is Cartaphilus. The name originates from an old Jewish myth of a man who offended god and was cursed to walk the world till judgement day. SCP-343 refuses to comment on this subject. Further research into this claim is underway.
Object Class: Keter Euclid
Special Containment Procedures:
Testing of living beings interacting with the SCP has been ended as ordered by the ethics committee. 05-council approval should be granted for any further action concerning SCP-XXXX.
SCP-XXXX is gaseous and acidic and should be kept in an atmospherically sealed room with an airlock. Walls should be constructed of Double-pained plexi-glass with floors and ceilings covered in a single sheet of Copper each. The room should be at least 20 cubic meters in volume and should be kept at 33 degrees Celsius.
SCP-XXXX is aggressive towards other life within a 30 meter radius but cannot see through obstacles, regardless of their opacity. Glass should be used for as much construction as possible to maximize researcher viewing capabilities and lower the risk of a breach.
See Addendum SCP-XXXX-1 for details on how it was contained
Description:
SCP-XXXX is a semi-sentient and is highly aggressive towards other sentient life. The SCP takes up a volume of 1/2 meters squared at its smallest but can expand to 12 Meters squared. The SCP is Luminescent giving off a faint orange light and its gas is a deep orange color. The method of producing light is unknown though it is believed it has something to do with biological material it consumes. Speculation has dictates that it is comprised of Fluoroantimonic acid as it is the only known acidic gas possible of achieving similar feats. Though we have yet to meet the same level of dissolving power to match the SCP.
The acidic gas is slow acting on Carbon based biological materials. Metals and stone will dissolve at an an increased speed depending on its atomic density, with metals like Osmium (The most dense) and Tungsten dissolving the quickest, and metals like lithium (The least dense) dissolve at a slower rate. The amount of each element present obviously has an effect on its potency and alloys designed to be acid resistant and naturally resistant metal, such as copper, cannot be dissolved as easily or at all.
Biological materials dissolve at a rate of (1/2 weight(In kilograms) = X, X is seconds)
Addendum:
Addendum SCP-XXXX-1:
SCP-XXXX containment log, date 11-8-1942. SCP-XXXX was brought to foundation attention on 10-30-1942 after reports of people and livestock going missing in the Mojave desert. The foundation enacted extra-terrestrial life containment protocol and set up a location to watch for the beings. 6 researchers and 3 armed personnel we stationed out there to watch. The team went radio silent after 3 days and a recon team was sent out to check up on the team. No researchers were found and their radios had been left behind. They are assumed deceased though no bodies were recovered. The tents and equipment they were using were heavily corroded and full of holes. Many materials showed signs of an extremely low Ph substance had been applied for long periods of time. Standard containment protocol for SCPs with Acidic properties was enacted on 11-7-1942. 4 containment personnel were injured with minor acid burns in the containment process when the SCP charged them and ate through their protective suites. The SCP was contained after being lured to a mobile Zirconium-alloy containment cell. Cell was too heavily damaged to be used in another capture and was scrapped upon removal of the SCP. Origins of the SCP are still unknown, but extraterrestrial life has not been ruled out, though it is unlikely.
SCP-XXXX was contained on 11-8-1942 and given a keter class designation.
SCP-XXXX was downgraded to Euclid on 6-3-1955 after a materials test determined that Glass and copper couldn't be dissolved or had extremely high resistance to the acidic nature of the SCP.
Addendum SCP-XXXX-2:
Voice recording 01, Date 1-7-1959 "Okay, Okay, so we put a Bull in the room with the damn Scip and the damn thing ate the damn cow. Well not exactly… it rushed towards it engulfing it entirely and the damn thing screamed and screamed for what felt like hours and hours… Though the stopwatch only read 8:49 (Eight minutes forty-nine seconds)! Nothing was left accept for what looked like a few ounces of metal dusts. Though we couldn't test it as it dissolved that a few seconds after and we couldnt get to it. I guess we know what happened to that recovery crew now… I dont know how the ethics committee is letting us get away with this." End of recording
Addendum SCP-XXXX-3
Multiple SCP-XXXX have been discovered, no special designation should be given to new subjects as no difference has been detected between the contained subject and wild subjects. No further SCP-XXXX should be captured (As ordered by the 05 council on 31-4-1962). SCP-XXXX copies should be neutralized with a basic solution with a Ph no lower than 13. We already have one of these, the other ones pose too much of a threat to the surrounding wild life and population, its either containment or eradication. We don't possess enough materials or space to capture every single one out there, and we can't enact containment protocol on a world wide phenomenon. Until better methods are discovered or they disappear this order stands. (05-council order designation SCP-XXXX-A)
Object Class: Euclid
Security Procedures:
SCP-XXXX is to be kept in standard anomalous object containment storage on site 33. Due to its unpredictable nature, and the injuries that have occurred, access has been restricted to level 4 as of 19-3-2015. If book becomes unreachable due to unforeseen changes, the attached tracker is to be activated and a retrieval team is to be sent to collect it. SCP-XXX's anomalous changes could happen at any time and should be handled with care constantly.
Description:
SCP-XXXX is an anomalous textbook titled "The Snake Oil Salesman's Physics-less physics book" and features a brightly colored covered cover. The words "Handle with care" are written on the back. The only author credited is "Me" which is captioned beneath a picture of a gray haired man smiling with a hooded cloak covering his eyes and giving a thumbs up. Research as to who this may be is still underway. The table of contents has pages crossed out and many titles and topics redacted. These pages are blank but numbered or the number is skipped. Contents of the book seem to cover most basic physics topics from objects in motion to heat mechanics. However SCP-XXXX lacks any descriptions of quantum physics.
SCP-XXX's anomalous property is its periodic lack of physics. How it achieves this is still being researched. SCP-XXX does not lack all physics simultaneously however, the physics that do and don't act on the book change at arbitrary intervals, the longest change was at 3 weeks [See Addendum SCP-XXXX-A]. SCP-XXXX has been noted as lacking gravity at times, and even as lacking collision with other objects. Objects bound within the cover of the book receive the same changes as the book itself, thus a small GPS tracker has been secured inside the back cover. SCP-XXXX is capable of achieving motion without outside force. Speed of motion has varied, and when paired with other changes in physics can lead to the item becoming lost. One other discernible note is its lack of damage, despite moving at high speeds into and through concrete barriers, no visible damage to the book can be identified.
Addendum
Addendum SCP-XXXX-A:
SCP-XXXX experienced a unique and unforeseen change on 7-9-2011. Changes included: Lack of object collision, lack of gravity, motion without force, and generation of heat without source. SCP-XXXX moved 5 km in 15 minutes and changed altitude from -3 km to 4 km.
Event Description: On 7-9-2011, SCP-XXXX began moving at a rate of 3 km a minute and was witnessed by several foundation employees as it passed through the building. After 15 minutes the book ceased movement entirely, at which point a retrieval team was sent to set up a retrieval base camp. The book remained motionless for 3 weeks, after which point it fell at a normal gravitational velocity unaffected by winds before landing 13 meters from the base camp. SCP-XXXX was recovered without event on 7-30-2011.
Object Class: Safe
Security Procedures:
SCP-XXXX is to be kept in standard anomalous object containment storage. Due to constant and repeated misuse of the object, access clearance level has been raised to 4. Use of SCP-XXXX outside of testing is prohibited.
Description:
SCP-XXXX is an orange tennis ball of standard size and weight with "Hit 'em anywhere" stamped on the side of it in black lettering. The cardboard box containing SCP-XXXX reads as follows: "The hit 'em anywhere ball" ever want to peg your friends in the face with a ball, but they aren't there in person or are in another room? Then this ball solve all your problems! Simply think of who you want to hit, and face in any direction then throw the ball! Guaranteed to hit 99% of the time!
Anomalous properties come into play when the ball is used as directed. Upon leaving contact with the user, the ball disappears from sight and returns a few seconds later traveling in the opposite direction it was thrown. As the name suggests, the ball is capable of hitting a person (in the face) from anywhere in the world. Ball always hits the target traveling in the same direction that it was thrown. Ball returns to the user after rebounding off the target and opposite the direction thrown.
Object Class: Keter
Security Procedures:
SCP-XXXX is to be kept in standard anomalous creature containment cell, 8 meters by 8 meters by 3 meters tall. Walls and floors are to be made of Iron sheets no less than 5mm thick. SCP-XXXX is to be fed 2-3 Bovine or Equestrian hearts a week to keep it from reverting to its hunting instincts.
Description:
SCP-XXXX is a slender fleshy being standing at 2.2 meters tall, with 10 elongated teeth protruding out of the front of what would be the face. The fangs can mesh together horizontally and close up the visible orifice. SCP-XXXX uses the fangs to scoop food into previously mentioned orifice. SCP-XXXX lacks external sensory organs, however it does react to lights and sounds.
The subject has 2 large flesh covered spikes, each protruding at the hips on opposite sides of the body. The purpose of which are is theorized to be residual as X-ray scans show them to be made of mostly cartilage. The arms of SCP-XXXX are covered in thick spines the cover the forearm. The right arm is cut off at the elbow, it is currently unknown whether it lost its arm or didn't have one to begin with. The existing wrist ends with 2 elongated bone-like fingers, one of which can be articulated. It uses this articulated finger to make rapid tapping noises to distract or attract unaware victims
The feet resemble humanoid hands, with a large thumb-like structure and 2 elongated "fingers" that SCP-XXXX is capable of articulating. It uses these feet to grapple onto ceilings and walls and to hold victims down for consumption.
Victim's bodies tend to follow a similar pattern. Most show signs of blunt force trauma to the skull along with several cuts along the spine, rendering the victim paralyzed but alive. Bodies tend to have their chest cavities cut open with the Stomach, Spleen, Heart, and Liver missing. Victims with higher amounts of iron in their blood had less organs eaten. Victims with extremely high, but still healthy, levels of iron had their blood drained via a slash to the throat before consumption.
Addendum:
Addendum SCP-XXXX-1:
Foreword: SCP-XXXX initial containment log. Date: ██-07-1996. The following is a transcript of agent ██████'s debrief report, MTF Team leader on containment date.
We were in ██████, Command told us we were supposed to be investigating reports of odd murders taking place in the town. Bodies were alleged to be dissected with a similar kill patterns and missing organs. Reports was, murders were taking place near the docks, somewhere around the warehouses. They sent us in as a team of 9, we were just supposed to investigate and report back any anomalous activity… We left as a team of 3. We entered warehouse 13 just after sunset, it was our fourth one of the night with no anomalies yet. We figured this would be a breeze of a field mission, easy in, easy out. Just follow Protocol and write the report…. God do I wish that's how it went. We cleared warehouse 13 and proceeded into the next one down the line. We entered and proceeded with a standard sweep formation, as protocol demands. About half way through our sweep, Agent Johnson noticed a faint tapping, coming from the shipping crates three or four rows ahead of us. I sent him and two other Agents to investigate, they never left my sight. That didn't stop that… that monster from slaughtering them. I barely knew the first two, they were new to my team. The first one was slashed across his spine, and he collapsed before he could react. the second one was bashed on the back of the neck, he too collapsed in a heap… but he wasn't dead. He cried out for help, he was paralyzed, frozen in place. Agent Johnson opened fire, not that there was much to hit. It… it was so scrawny.
Object Class: Euclid
Security Procedure
Site ███ is to be locked down and sealed. No equipment is to be taken outside of the interior anomalous laboratory designated SCP-XXXX-1. In the event an entity awakens and attempts to escape, it is to be contained and designated SCP-XXXX-2 and Protocol Ouroboros is to be enacted. See Addendum SCP-XXXX-A.
An SCP-XXXX-2 entity can awaken at random intervals but tend to occur before the 10th of the current month. The empty slots for bots 53 through 56 suggest that 4 conscious entities have awakened and escaped into the world prior to discovery and containment. They are to be captured at any attempted at returning or if sighted.
On the 10th of every month, updates to the connections log viewed on the monitor are to be noted for changes. Signals are to be under constant interception and rerouting. During the interception process GPS data is to be collected if possible from incoming signals before being rerouted back to its original destination. Outgoing signals are required to be cleared by current lead researcher prior to continuation to delivery.
Description
SCP-XXXX-1 is a laboratory situated beneath a house in rural █████, Germany. Inside are 52 humanoid robots, with 4 empty slots and 28 cryogenic preservation pods, occupied by 26 humans, 15 males and 11 females. Two pods are damaged and occupied by skeletons, the remains are not to be further disturbed post identification. 8 of the 26 subjects who remain alive have been identified as civilians linked to missing persons cases, the remaining 26 have yet to be identified. One of the subjects is presumed to be Dr. █████, who researched and implemented this project.
SCP-XXXX-2 is the designation given an awaken conciseness personality originating from one of the subjects inside a preservation pod. Subjects can awaken in many stats of emotion and can awaken hostile and confused. In which case subject is to be restrained via short range directed EMP, after which the occupying conciseness is to be extracted and presented for further examination.
The method of which a human consciousness has been extracted from a human body is yet to be understood. Dr. █████'s notes indicates that extending the brain activity during REM sleep via cryogenic stasis can allow computer algorithms pinpoint and extract consciousnesses from the brain. The foundation has yet to replicate the algorithms needed to pinpoint consciousness. Along with the previous, the foundation is still not aware of the cause, location, or mechanics responsible for human conciseness as they are not described anywhere in the notebooks.
A large computer monitor on the back wall displays a window marked "connections" with five nodes on it, the computer updates these connections on the 10th of every month. The central Node marked "Command" branches out to 4 out going connections to nodes marked "Drones" designated Alpha, Beta, Charlie, and Delta. As of 08/10/09 Drone Delta was marked as "Lost Connection" and Drone Beta was marked as Terminated Via Command.
Addendum:
SCP-XXXX-A: Protocol Ouroboros is the act of interviewing the SCP-XXXX-2 entity to obtain any remaining information, and extracting the consciousness attached to it for further identification and testing. The subject will express explicit desires opposed to this, and will claim to experience great pain and will act in such a way. However due to the design of SCP-XXXX-2, it is improbable that this is the case. Upon successful completion of extraction, the robotic humanoid body is to be returned to SCP-XXXX-1 in its designated numbered slot.
SCP-XXXX-B: Dr. █████'s notes. A series of notebooks were found scattered around the small laboratory. The following is an incomplete transcribing of relevant notes of the Dr. self explaining the project in a sort of diary entry.
[Entry 564, March 11, 2001] Project Broken Ouroboros is, my Magnum Opus. My attempt at immortality. What if instead of some death curing concoction of chemicals or some life extending drug, you could transfer your conciseness into a machine, a robot. Just think of the beauty! No need to waste your life eating, or sleeping! Just a life full of science, and watching humanity develop. Oh how I love to watch people, such interesting creatures. Yet, so short the time to experience them, such a small window of time! This is my thoughts toward immortality, an machine body with a constant backup of my conciseness, so that if one physical body becomes damaged, I can just hot-swap into a fresh one! I am breaking the Ouroboros of the universe! No longer will my death bring new life, no longer will my life sew death upon this world. I shall remove myself from the circle of life. A god among men, immortal till entropy ends us all! Maybe I shall watch this world from the sidelines, experiencing all and nothing. I could control several of Drones of me at the same time, all linked and around the world experiencing things as a separated collective. The possibilities are endless! Research has already begun!!!






Per 



