Item #: SCP-4875-J
Object Class: Euclid Dairy
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-4875-J is to be kept in a container submerged in 10 liters water to dilute its properties. This container is to be kept in 6 layers of reinforced concrete, each layer being 10 feet thick. (Don't ask how, but) The concrete must be replaced once every 2 months, this procedure is to be done by [DATA EXPUNGED].
Description: SCP-4875-J appears to be a piece of standard issue military grade cheese. However, whenever anything living, or man made comes in contact to it, the object/entity will get will get The Cheese Touch.
Whenever someone, or something touches SCP-4875-J, The Cheese Touch instantly starts taking effect on the host, and the object/entity is now to be referred to as SCP-4875-J-1. SCP-4875-J-1 instantly gets an extreme desire to touch the nearest person. SCP-4875-J-1 is not very communicative, and will only let out an occasional hum with the person they are talking to. If SCP-4875-J-1 succeeds in "touching" another entity, The Cheese Touch will be passed on to what the old SCP-4875-J-1 touched, and the entity that has been touched is the new SCP-4875-J-1.
If SCP-4875-J-1 has been SCP-4875-J-1 for 24 hours, SCP-4875-J-1 will instantly turn into a statue of cheese, and is now to be referred to SCP-4875-J-2. Approximately 30 seconds after SCP-4875-J-2 has been existent, SCP-4875-J-3 will come and pick it up.
Any attempts in touching any version of SCP-4875-J-2 has ended in the subject getting The Cheese Touch.
Procedure: the Melting of SCP-4875-J in a microwave
Results:SCP-4875-J has now achieved nuclear fusion and can now make SCP-4875-J-4
SCP-4875-J-4 can also turn liquids into more SCP-4875-J-4
Analysis: Why, how did we make this worse.
Log:
The test is about to to begin. We are currently placing SCP-4875-J into the microwave, and setting the time to 99:99 and pressing start.
We are now about 60 seconds in and SCP-4875-J is melting, so I think we can safely say it is neutralized.
Wait, the microwave is getting really hot the and it smells like nacho cheese. Umm, well now the melting SCP-4875-J just turned into something else. It seems to be moving about 10 seconds later. It started to melt through the microwave, oh no, containment breach! Containment breach! End the fucking log!
End log
Test A - Date: ██/██/████
Subject: SCP-999-J
Procedure: Feeding a piece of SCP-4875-J on a saltine cracker to SCP-999-J
Results: SCP-999-J takes a small bite out of it, burps, then puts the rest in SCP-999-J-1 for later.
Analysis: SCP-999-J is immortal? Fuck. 05-█ will be pissed.
We’ve been trying to get this fucker for years, and now we may finally have a chance.
Log:
D-7592 was placed on a bed, and told to sleep. SCP-999-J appeared 3.5 hours into > D-7592’s sleep cycle.
At this time, Dr. ████ walks in.
Dr. ████: Hello
SCP-999-J: Oh, hey man.
Dr. ████: Do you mind if I interview you?
SCP-999-J: Sure. Go ahead.
<Begin Log>
Dr. ████: So, we-
SCP-999-J: I’m gonna be honest, you’re pretty hot. You wanna go out?
Dr. ████: No.
SCP-999-J: You sure? I’m in a band.
Dr. ████: Yes. I am quite sure. Also, there’s no way that you’re in a band.
SCP-999-J: Yes I do!
Dr. ████: Oh really? Prove it.
[At this time, SCP-999-J reaches into SCP-999-J-1, and pulls out a magazine,
frantically flips through it, tears out a page, and hands it to Dr. ████]
SCP-999-J: Told you
Dr. ████: Bullshit. This is just a photo of Dr. ██████’s old band, with your face > crudely stapled onto it.
SCP-999-J: You’re bullshit.
Dr. ████: Just eat this fuckingcracker will you? [Dr. ████ holds out the saltine
with SCP-4875-J on it]
SCP-999-J: Oh sweet!
[SCP-999-J takes a small bite out of it, burps, says he will “save it for later,” and
puts the rest in SCP-999-J-1 for safekeeping.
Dr. ████: Thank you.
SCP-999-J: So are we done?
Dr. ████: Yes, now get the fuck out of here before I [REDACTED]
<End Log]>
Closing Statement: SCP-999-J is a cunt.
SCP-999-J was reported being seen roughly two days after the incident.
SCP-4875-J-3 is a Caucasian male, no more than 5' 10'', appears to be wearing an XXL standard biker jacket, and drives a white van. SCP-4875-J-3, along with his van, will appear out of fucking thin air, and take SCP-4875-J-2 away. SCP-4875-J-3 and his van appears to ignore all objects, and will simply phase through everything. After he brings SCP-4875-J-2 in his van, he will look at everyone in the room, say "Gentlemen," takes a fedora out of his van, puts it on, tips it, and drives off.
Procedure: Trying to get SCP-682 to eat SCP-4875-J-3.
Results: SCP-4875-J-3 talks for four hours straight, causing SCP-682 to break containment out of boredom.
Log:
Okay, this is Dr. ███ today we are trying to get rid of SCP-4875-J-3, because if
SCP-4875 can’t distribute itself, then it can’t harm people on a massive scale.
It has been around 24 hours and there we go
[SCP-4875-J-3 drives into the room]
Dr. ███: Hey man, can you follow me really quickly? I got some candy for you.
SCP-4875-J-3: Okay.
SCP-4875-J-3: So, where is this so called candy.
Dr. ███: Ummm, right here.
SCP-4875-J-3: Okay.
Dr. ███: Just go in.
[SCP-4875-J-3 walks into SCP-682’s containment chamber]
SCP-4875-J-3: So, where is the candy?
SCP-682: So, doctor, what have you brought me today?
SCP-4875-J-3: Hey Dr. ███, that doesn’t look like candy.
Dr. ███ SCP-682, please just eat him. You don't know how much of a pain in the
fucking ass he has been to me and the foundation.
SCP-682: With pleasure.
[At this time SCP-682 bits SCP-4875-J-3 in half. But SCP-4875-J-3 regenerates a
part of his torso, and then he proceeds to reckoned his upper half to his lower half]
Dr. ███: what the actually [REDACTED] why and how can he do that
SCP-4875-J-3: So, can I get candy now?
Dr. ███: No! [Dr. ███ walks away]
SCP-682: You’re really just going to leave this thing here with me?
[Dr. ███ comes back]
Dr. ███: Okay, can you just, like eat him hole or some shit? [at this time
SCP-4875-J-3 gives off a smell that you can’t Describe with words].
Dr. ███: Go on, eat him.
SCP-682: There are a lot of things I would eat doctor, but right now that fucking
thing is not one of them.
Dr. ███: What are you talking about? [At this moment Dr. ███ smells what
SCP-682 is smelling and immediately throws up]
SCP-4875-J-3: Hey guys want to hear my life story ?
SCP-682 and Dr. ███: NO
SCP-4875-J-3: Too bad. I’m going to tell you anyway [SCP-4875-J-3 then talks
for four hours straight causing Dr. ███ to leave.
[SCP-4875-J-3, SCP-682 finally has had enough of SCP-4875-J-3 talking about
random nonsense and breaks containment]
<End Log>
Closing Statement: Dr. ███ quits working on SCP-4875-J.
Item #: SCP-4875
Object Class: Keter Swiss
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-4875 is to be kept in a container submerged in 200 liters of liquid nitrogen to cool down SCP-4875-4. This container is comprised of 6 layers of concrete this concrete must be reinforced with tungsten rods .The concrete must be replaced once every 2 months, this procedure is performed by on site staff maintenance crew #███.
Description: SCP-4875 appears to be a piece of standard issue military grade cheese, it appears that SCP-4875 secretes an extremely hot orange and viscous liquid which has been recognized and presumed to be nacho cheese, now being referred to as SCP-4875-4 [See Addendum 4]. It has become apparent that whenever anything organic that comes in contact to SCP-4875, the entity will get will get The Cheese Touch.
SCP-4875 also seems to take a psychological toll on anyone who stays within a 20 foot vicinity, making them have an extreme urge to touch SCP-4875. It has also been able to drive people insane; Dr. ████ being the biggest threat because of this [See Addendum 6]
Whenever someone, or something touches SCP-4875, The Cheese Touch instantly starts taking effect on the host, and the object/entity is now to be referred to as SCP-4875-1. SCP-4875-1 instantly gets an extreme desire to touch the nearest person sexually. No matter what they're sexual preference was before. SCP-4875-1 is not very communicative, and will only let out an occasional flirt with the person they are talking to. If SCP-4875-1 succeeds in, ummm, "touching" another entity, The Cheese Touch will be passed on to what the old SCP-4875-1 touched, and the entity that has been touched is the new SCP-4875-1.
If SCP-4875-J-1 has been SCP-4875-1 for 24 hours, SCP-4875-1 will T-pose and instantly turn into a statue of T-posing cheese, and is now to be referred to SCP-4875-J-2. Approximately 30 seconds after SCP-4875-2 has been existent, SCP-4875-3 will come and pick it up.
Any attempts in touching any version of SCP-4875-2 has ended in the subject getting The Cheese Touch.
*Time*: Studying where SCP-4875-3 actually fucking goes.
Mission log 1
Capt ███
Ok so it had been approximately 23 hours and 59 minutes since SCP-4875 had been given to D-302 me and my team had already been up updated on how SCP-4875- works, and now we were just waiting till SCP-4875-3 shows up. And then about 30 seconds later SCP-4875-1 starts turning into SCP-4875-2 he stops rubbing his [REDACTED] all over the glass, t-poses, and turns into SCP-4875-2. About 30 seconds later the room starts to rapidly expand, and out of nowhere the van of SCP-4875-3 appears and out walks SCP-4875-3 and then he proceeds to phase through the glass and then he grabs SCP-4875-2 then he pulls a fedora out of nowhere and then he tips the fedora as he throws SCP-4875-2 into his van then he finally gets in the van and then drives through the wall and then our mission began we were tasked to follow SCP-4875-3 and to see if he went anywhere else than a farmers market. It had been exactly 56 min since we put the tracker on the Van when he finally stopped the van at a farmers market that had just been closed off by the SCP foundation because of SCP-757-1 rumors. What our fucking luck. the van goes over and SCP-4875-3 steps out and tried to sell SCP-4875 to one of the class D personnel we tell the D class not to take SCP-4875 and the D class then replies to SCP-4875-3 and about 10 seconds later SCP-4875-3 took some of SCP-4875-2 and shoved it down the guys throats. We then unloaded all of our ammo into that thing, and it doesn't fucking do anything. In the end, half of my team was turned into cheese, and then SCP-4875-3 just vanished the the half of my team that was attacked. The rest, along with me, were immediately quarantined. We then terminated all of the D classes were hiding. Bloody hell, that whole fucking mission was a mess.
End log
Item #: SCP-4875
Object Class: Apollyon Keter Cheese
Special Containment Procedures: "Find a way keep this fucker contained or else we're all dead. Don't ask me how, but trust me. We will all fucking die." - Dr. ██████
SCP-4875 is to be kept in a container submerged in 200 liters of liquid nitrogen to dilute the properties of SCP-4875-4. This container is to be kept in 6 layers of concrete each supplemented with 22% 34bX organic mold spores weaved into the concrete mixture reinforced with FX600 renforcement tungsten rods, each layer being 7.5 meters thick. On the prime containment surfaces, the absolute value of the highest and lowest point must not exceed 0.2 millimeters. The concrete must be replaced once every 2 months, this procedure is performed by on site staff maintenance crew #███.
SCP-4875 is by all means, currently uncontainable due to the properties of SCP-4875-3 [See Addendum 4].
Description: SCP-4875 appears to be a piece of standard issue military grade cheese, it appears that SCP-4875 secretes a highly acidic orange and viscous liquid which has been recognized and presumed to be nacho cheese, now being referred to as SCP-4875-4 [See Addendum 4]. This substance is to be referred to as SCP-4875-4. However, whenever anything comes in contact to SCP-4875, the object/entity will get will get The Cheese Touch.
Whenever someone, or something touches SCP-4875, The Cheese Touch instantly starts taking effect on the host, and the object/entity is now to be referred to as SCP-4875-1. SCP-4875-1 instantly gets an extreme desire to touch the nearest person sexually. No matter what they're sexual preference was before. SCP-4875-1 is not very communicative, and will only let out an occasional flirt with the person they are talking to. If SCP-4875-1 succeeds in, ummm, "touching" another entity, The Cheese Touch will be passed on to what the old SCP-4875-1 touched, and the entity that has been touched is the new SCP-4875-1.
If SCP-4875-J-1 has been SCP-4875-1 for 24 hours, SCP-4875-1 will instantly turn into a statue of cheese, and is now to be referred to SCP-4875-2. Approximately 30 seconds after SCP-4875-2 has been existent, SCP-4875-3 will come and pick it up.
After this, SCP-4875-3 will drive to the nearest farmers market, and try to sell SCP-4875-2. Any attempts in provoking SCP-4875-3 has ended in SCP-4875-3 shoving SCP-4875-2 down the provokers throats, and stealing $20 each from their wallets [See Addendum 5].
Any attempts in touching any version of SCP-4875-2 has ended in the subject getting The Cheese Touch.
[[/collapsible]]
Log:
Okay, so, if you don’t already know, Dr. ████ was affected by SCP-4875 in a way that we haven’t observed before.[[/footnote]]He is now to be referred to as SCP-4875-5. He changed the SCP-4875’s information making its weakness cheese, keeping SCP-4875 in water, making the object class Dairy, and the uses organic mold spores weaved into a concrete mixture to quote on quote counter the SCP like what the actually fuck does that mean. and sad thing is that people fell for this costing the lives of multiple foundation staff and then he almost causes CK-class restructuring scenario. Okay, so far this log has been pretty vague, but one day Dr. ████ Snapped he completely lost his mind, and he let SCP-4875 Escape by shoving it down D-4328’s throat. Then, SCP-4875-3 comes and goes to the nearest market. Luckily, however; it was 12 o'clock and nobody was there, so SCP-4875-3 kind of just left. After this Dr. ████ was turned into an E class personnel.
End log
Procedure: Sending SCP-4875 to the moon
Results: A CK-class restructuring scenario has started, and it is affecting the multiverse at a mass scale. SCP-4875 is also now an apollyon.
Analysis: Goodbye World :)
Log:
“Okay, this is Dr.██████, and my new test finally made it through. Hopefully it will not go as bad as the last test. Okay, so, the rocket is about to launch. Yes we are sending SCP-4875 to the moon, in hopes of stopping it from killing anyone else.”
*Approximately 10 Minutes Later*
“Three, two, one liftoff! Yes! Now all we can do now, is wait.”
*4 Days Later*
“Okay, so, it has landed on the moon, and well, now, uhhh, the moon is yellow. I think that it is because there was no life on the moon, so SCP-4875 decided to convert the moon in to SCP-4875-2. We thought that it could only turn organic things into SCP-4875-2, but if we’re wrong, then….oh..oh god.
*Approximately 24 Hours Later*
There it is SCP-4875-3. It’s the end. SCP-4875-3 is about the size of the earth now. He will go out to the universe with the now evolved SCP-4875, and everything, yes, everything, will turn into cheese. Then he’ll take the universe sized SCP-4875 out into the multiverse, and that’s… We need to stop it, now! No wait i forgot there is no stopping this thing now!”
*At that moment SCP-4875-3 loads the now moon size SCP-4875-2 into the van, tips his hat, and drives off.*
“Goodbye World.” [A gunshot is heard]
Two minutes later Dr. ██████ was found with a self inflicted gunshot wound from a > standard issue Glock-17.
End log:
Log:
So, what you just saw was a document from another universe. This document along with some personal were sent over right before their universe collapsed using their designated SCP-5000. This SCP has hence been renamed to SCP-5000-ARC, since it’s more than likely neutralized.
We believe that Dr.██████ was being controlled by SCP-4875-J, and that he didn’t have permission to launch the rocket. The people we recovered tried to send someone into SCP-5000’s containment grounds to see if anything survived, but the D-class we sent in instantly turned into cheese, along with the rope he had wrapped around him. On the bright side, we now have a sample of SCP-4875-J, and SCP-4875-J-2 for further testing. SCP-4875-J is still a big threat, if not the biggest threat to this universe, but SCP-4875-J-3’s van broke down so it will take longer to get to the next universe. I mean, judging from the description he seems pretty fat, so it’s not like he’ll be running here anytime soon. In all seriousness though, we need to stop this thing before it gets to us since technically, because it’s in existence, it could just turn it all to cheese… so why doesn’t it?
Well, here's why; it’s because this cheese is pure fucking evil. It’s toying with us goddamnit. Making us feel hopeless and scared. A report from some of the Foundation staff from the other universe said that SCP-4875-J destroyed the universe in seconds.
We need to stop this thing, but how do we?
End log
BY ORDER OF THE OVERSEER COUNCIL
The following file describes a potential YK-End-Of-Reality-Scenario entity,
and is Level 6/4838 classified
Unauthorized access is forbidden.
4983
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-4983 is to be contained in Site-66 using a 1 meter thick container of reinforced titanium.
Personnel that are permitted to be working on this are to be under Level 5 Surveillance at all times. These personnel must be at least level 4 to be accepted, and must be approved by 05-█ to work on SCP-4983’s containment. After their work is done, they are to be given Level 3 Amnestics and should not have any recollection of SCP-4983.
Due to SCP-4983’s importance, SCP-4983 has been covered up in part with a different SCP. So anybody who doesn’t have direct access from 05-█ is to be shown [[this|LINK]] document instead.
Any personnel that try to damage the tree are to be terminated.
Description: SCP-4983 is a teatherball that was located in ████████ Elementary School prior to its discovery. This ball has the anomalous property of encapsulating the entire universe inside of it. Everything within the universe has been shrunken down into this ball.
Despite what physics deem to be possible, though, this is not an identical universe; this is ours. Essentially, any damage done to the ball is damage done to the universe. Any event that happens in the universe will happen to the tree.
It is uncertain whether the tree can die of old age, but we do not believe that it will [See recovered chat log].
Discovery: SCP-4983 was discovered on ██/██/████ by MTF Theta 4 (“Gardeners”) and MTF Epsilon 6 (“Village Idiots”) after an anonymous message was sent to 05-█ 's personal email containing the following message:
From: Your Mom XD
Subject: For The Foundation
Date: ██/██/████
Yeah I might wanna check up on this lol: 37°48'13.4"N 122°14'37.7"W
P.S. You can try all you want, but you’re not finding me XD ass
With love, G.A.C.
This document was later confirmed to be sent by a member of the G.A.C. [Gamers Against Weed].
Containment Class:
explained
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-4983 is to be contained in an encrypted thumb drive located a shelf of Level 4 Researcher Dr. ████ 's desk. As of ██/██/████, nobody is to access SCP-4983 under any circumstances, as there is nothing left to study for now.
Description: SCP-4983 was an extremely advanced piece of AI/Malware that caused the deletion of over 2000 Foundation documents. SCP-4983 was used as a diversion that happened during the Serpent's Hand’s most recent break-in, where they stole many things including SCP-████. SCP-4983 is extremely docile, and was able to access all of the Foundation data within seconds.
SCP-4983 has a face of a human skeleton, and will pop up on the screen of the computer that it is currently ‘located’. SCP-4983’s face has the ability to move from one computer to any other computer as long as it is infected as well. The reason why SCP-4983 was considered anomalous at first are for the following reasons:
- Being able to project a voice even when no volume or speakers are on/present
- Having the ability to show emotions such as fear, joy, and anger
- Being able to see without a camera being on the computer
- Being able to hear without a microphone present
Nobody realized that Serpent’s Hand had even entered the Foundation until three days later, when Security Personnel ████ de-encrypted footage that SCP-4983 had previously encrypted.
Item #: SCP-4850
Object Class: Safe Keter Neutralized Cernunnos Euclid Thaumiel Ooga booga does it fucking matter at this point?
Special Containment Procedures: Despite the fact that SCP-4850 is technically uncontainable, SCP-4850 is to be contained reside part time in a standard Norwegian prison cell, no more than 15 meters in length, 10 meters in width, and 5 meters in height.
There is to be a microcamera placed on him at all times, along with a GPS.
The history of SCP-4850’s containment procedures go as follows:
SCP-4850, with the clearance of two level three personnel, is allowed to roam the halls freely from the time of 2:00PM to 7:00PM, since it appears to want to do no harm.
Due to the recent events [See Addendum 3], SCP-4850 has breached containment, and is currently missing. He was last viewed on ██/██/████. If anyone finds him/figures out a way to contain him, they are to report to O5-█ immediately.
You’re mom
SCP FOUNDATION INTERNAL MEMO
Everyone, I apologize for the inconvenience. It appears that all of the containment procedures have been updated. Don’t worry, this is being fixed now. With that, though, I would like to implement a new rule.
From now on, nobody is to give SCP-4850 their Foundation account password. I don’t know whose idea it was to do this, but if you know who, please report to me asap. This isn’t funny, guys. We have lives to save here.
- Dr. B. Sitck
SCP-4850 has established contact with the Foundation, using Agent Remus’ radio frequency. SCP-4850 didn’t answer any questioning, only asking for help with 8th grade math homework.
As of ██/██/████, SCP-4850 was determined to be neutralized. The last known contact we have had with SCP-4850 was via Dr. Repoks private Twitter messaging, where he described his current situation, and saying that he won’t be able to survive for much longer.
Turns out that when he contacted Dr. Repoks, he was just playing No Man’s Sky. SCP-4850 was found in his cell… goddamnit I fucking hate my job I don’t get paid enough to write this shit.
Description: SCP-4850 appears to be a half Caucasian, half Native American male, 6ft, and no more than 26 years of age. He is quite charismatic, making friends with my son over the fortnite and pokemon go Dr. Clef.
SCP-4850 is an omnipresent, and has the ability to summon melons anywhere in the universe within nanoseconds, however; SCP-4850 appears to only be able to travel 100 meters in distance.
Addendum 4850.1: SCP-4850 summons an infinity melon.
Addendum 1
Infinity Melon
Dating on ██/██/████, SCP-4850 summoned a melon at Dr. Clef’s request, however; the melon that he summoned was anomalous. When Dr. Clef cut the melon in half, it turned into two melons. Upon further testing, any time this melon is cut, the melon regenerates, and the melon slice turns into a whole melon within seconds.
Audio recording of the event
Dr. Clef: Hey can I have a melon?
SCP-4850: nods
A melon appears on the table next to Dr. Clef
Dr. Clef: Thanks bro.
Dr. Clef cuts into the melon
Dr. Clef: Oh what the fuck dude.
<End log>
Addendum 4850.3: SCP-4850 breaching containment.
On ██/██/████, Janitor Yeltsin was going into SCP-4850’s containment to do a scheduled clean of it. When he went into SCP-4850’s containment, he found nobody there. All he could find was a sticky note saying ”I must tend to my farm”.
It was later confirmed that he has a melon farm on the dark side of the moon.
Addendum 4850.4: SCP-4850’s interaction with SCP-999-J
Addendum 4
Audio logs of what transpired
SCP-999-J walks up to SCP-4850
SCP-999-J: Hey man. Spare any melons?
At this time, a pomegranate gets summoned.
Silence
SCP-999-J: Dude is this like a joke or something?
SCP-4850 takes a few steps back with a neutral expression before disappearing
<End log>
Secondary Class:
{$secondary-class}
Special Containment Procedures: No containment procedures for SCP-4836 are required, as SCP-4836 has been confirmed to not exist.
Description: SCP-4836 was an infohazard, no more. SCP-4836 DOES NOT exist, no matter what anyone might tell you. This page is currently under deletion, so just stay patient for it to do so.
- Director of Site-86, Dr. Jin
Don’t trust their words, no matter the cost. Don’t let them get to you.
Containment Class:
esoteric
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-4836 is to be contained in Area-12 using 6 2.5x2.5 meter plexiglass cells 12 centimeters thick. Any personnel who try to enter one of its containment cells must have special permission from two or more on site Level 4 Researchers, and must undergo all of the necessary Level 3 Decontamination Protocols.
Anybody who goes into physical contact with an instance of SCP-4836 is to be terminated with no exceptions.
Description: SCP-4836 is a virus that affects all living things down to the brain. SCP-4836 is extremely contagious, and is transmitted through physical contact. Upon receiving this virus, the receiver is now a member of what SCP-4836 calls “The Collective”. All members of The Collective are now to be referred to as SCP-4836-1.
SCP-4836-1 is a hive mind made up of all living things that SCP-4836 has infected. It has become apparent that all instances of SCP-4836-1 has no more levels of conscious thinking of their own, and all of the memories retaining to the host are gone as well. On top of this, no consistent cure for SCP-4836 has been found, and is unlikely to ever be found [See Addenda].
Despite all known instances of SCP-4836-1 being contained, it is unknown how many exist and/or existed prior to containment. While SCP-4836 claims that all instances are contained, all Foundation Personnel and active Field Agents are to be warned and trained for a possible SCP-4836 outbreak in their area.
Upon testing, SCP-4836 needs time to process the information obtained from a new SCP-4836-1. This time can range anywhere from 10 minutes to 1 hour. If the new SCP-4836-1 is killed before it can process all the information, SCP-4836 will forget all of it.
Discovery: Discovery goes as follows:
SCP FOUNDATION INTERNAL MEMO
Area-12
Dr. Jackson H. Lee
Dating on 4/9/2008, we had lost all contact with one of our top field agents, Agent Remus. Agent Remus’ last known location was in the small town of Bellvue, Colorado, after he was tasked with investigating a possible “outbreak” of SCP-2439. We do; however, have audio transcript logs following up to and on the date of his disappearance.
Logs recovered from Agent Remus
Date: 4/4/2008
Check check? Okay great, you can hear me. I totally forgot to check if this thing worked or not before I left. Anyways, I’ve just settled in my temporary residence and it’s going pretty well; food here is nice and all that. Can’t really complain about that.
So far from the info I’ve been able to gather is that this is a pretty small place people wise. If I had to guess, I’d probably say there’s around 300 people max. I haven’t found anything yet, but then again, I arrived here at around 9pm, so there was only like 2 people still outside. I’ll check back in tomorrow. Until then, Remus out.
Date: 4/5/2008
It’s confirmed. There is no SCP-2439 instance here. Still… something is off here. Within the past 12 hours 3 people have been sent to the local hospital for the exact same reason: Split Personality. Not just that, but from what I could gather, their split personalities are all the same. They’re also wheeling them out in full on hazmat suits, which is definitely not standard procedure.
Local officials say it’s fine, but my experience working for the foundation says otherwise. Of course I could just be jumping the gun here, but this could be an undiscovered SCP. I don’t know, this might be an instance where we need to call in a task force. I’m gonna be staying a bit longer, though, just to make sure that my suspicions are correct…
Date: 4/6/2008
Okay, it’s confirmed. There’s something going on. There have been 7 more people with the exact same case since I last sent in a report. Just outside of my hotel room even, someone was banging on my door demanding to get in before being tased and carried off. I would come back to tell everyone, but local officials are barring us from leaving. Apparently cell towers are down too, so none of these messages have actually been sending… that’s just fucking dandy isn’t it?
As soon as I can find a break in their security, I’m gonna be making a break for it. Until then, I’ll just continue talking to myself.
Date: 4/7/2008
There has been 30 more instances of this since the last time I last checked in… this is bad. I’ve concluded that this is some sort of hive mind virus that transmits via physical contact. Local forces are now armed as well, and are starting to open fire on the instances. We are now also barred from going outside, and are told that we will be fired upon if we’re seen roaming.
Addendum 4836.3:
Director Jenkins: So what’s this I’m looking at?
Dr. Lee: Well, this is SCP-4836.
Director Jenkins: Tell me something I don’t know…
Dr. Lee: Right. SCP-4836 is essentially a hive mind virus that affects the brain upon physical contact of someone else.
Director Jenkins: Is it intelligent?
At this time an SCP-4836-1 walks up to Director Jenkins and Dr. Lee
SCP-4836: Oh, I don’t know. How about you tell me?
Director Jenkins: Ah, so, that’s a yes then.
Dr. Lee: Yes. It’s extremely intelligent, and it knows its-
SCP-4836: Doctor, with all due respect, which is none, nobody wants to hear your dumbass voice. Can you leave?
Dr. Lee: Fine, dick. Have it your way. I’m gonna go get some coffee, I’ll be back in a minute. Don’t talk to him, okay?
Director Jenkins: Of course.
Dr. Lee: Want anything?
Director Jenkins: I’m good, thanks though.
Dr. Lee nods and leaves the room, leaving only Director Jenkins and SCP-4836.
Director Jenkins sits down, takes out a magazine, and lights a cigar. After 3 seconds of silence, the video cuts out for 10 minutes due to unknown reasons. When the video comes back, Director Jenkins is still sitting in his chair reading. Nothing about SCP-4836’s containment has changed either.
Dr. Lee enters the room.
Dr. Lee: Anything happened while I was gone?
Director Jenkins: Nope. Would’ve left the room if something did.
Dr. Lee: Alright, great.
Dr. Lee describes SCP-4836 in detail to Director Jenkins for the next 20 minutes.
<End Log>
SCP FOUNDATION INTERNAL MEMO
Area-12
Dir. Tarik P. Jenkins
Hello everyone. This might be a bit sudden, however; this will be worth your time. According to new data collected by our research team, our newly captured anomy, SCP-4836, has been confirmed by our researchers to not be a virus, but rather an event of mass hysteria. Because of this new find, I will be doing the following:
- Requesting the Classification Board to declassify SCP-4836
- Requesting the Ethics Board to keep all of the instances of this hysteria
- Lowering the security on SCP-4836 to almost nothing
- Suspending all tests on SCP-4836
If you have any questions regarding our choices, I’m the one you should ask. Thank you for your time.
Addendum 4836.4: Classification / Ethics Committee Joint Ruling on SCP-4836
ETHICS COMMITTEE RULING
Despite the fact that SCP-4836 has been disproven due to recent science, Dr. Jenkins, the director of Area-12, has requested that we keep all of the instances of this hysteria for further research. While the exact parameters of this “research” is vastly undefined, I believe that it is still the best thing to do.
Dr. Jeremiah Cimmerian
Foundation Ethics Committee Head
VOTE TO ACCEPT SCP-4836 CONTAINMENT PROCEDURES PROPOSAL
VOTES FOR
H. Arnold / L. Kim / K. Kingsley / J. Cimmerian
VOTES AGAINST:
E. Wilder / P. Van Price / J. Jackson
MOTION CARRIES
CLASSIFICATION COMMITTEE RULING
After the recent update to containment status of SCP-4836 from the Ethics Committee, Director Jenkins has requested that SCP-4836 get declassified. With that, though, there will be budget cuts on its containment, since they’re not as harmful as once guessed. In conclusion, this will declassify SCP-4836 as a whole. Nonetheless, this is the right thing to do, and we must vote on this.
Dr. B. Sitck
Foundation Classification Committee Head
VOTE TO DECLASSIFY SCP-4836
VOTES FOR
B. Sitck / J.R. Sneddon / M. Prince / J. Sydney / T. Paxton / S. Alexander / J. Aktus / A. Deck / C. Ivester
VOTES AGAINST:
M. Bridges / A. Desai
MOTION CARRIES
Per 
