Per 
- SCP-EP-J
- SCP-EP-J Revision I
- OPERATION: r/EntitledParents
- Mobile Task Force Kesha-12 ("Suppressive Fire")
- Mobile Task Force Delta-19 ("Man's Final Weapon")
- SCP-0000 - "It's time to be productive"
Item #: SCP-EP-J
Object Class: Archon
Description: SCP-EP-J is everywhere, in the form of SCP-EP-J-1. SCP-EP-J-1 takes the form as a stereotypical "Karen" female, with the "I want to speak to your manager" haircut. Should you ever encounter one, look for somebody with authority, as that usually scares SCP-EP-J instances away. SCP-EP-J-1 instances typically search for those who look physically incapable or otherwise deficient in any way in the eyes of the SCP-EP-J-1 instance.
Special Containment Procedures: We currently have no means of containing SCP-EP-J - if any of you do. Contact Dr. ██████ or Dr. █████. We are no longer attempting to contain SCP-EP-J, see Addendum SCP-EP-J-A.
Addendum SCP-EP-J-A:
SCP-EP-J has been classified as object class "Archon" because the effects of SCP-EP-J instances are not present when the host is in a peaceful state - however should the host feel annoyed, oppressed or any sort of negatively-associated emotion, the effects are immediately apparent. As a result, it has been decided that SCP-EP-J instances will not be contained as they have been inserted very deep into society with their intimidation skills. This also means that the Foundation does not have the current means or resources to contain all instances of SCP-EP-J.
Addendum SCP-EP-J-B:
It has been discovered that SCP-EP-J is present in children too - some being very reliant on their SCP-EP-J-1 instance family. All instances of SCP-EP-J that are considered children are to be referred as SCP-EP-J-2. SCP-EP-J-2 usually demand for something - or cause trouble in any other way they can find. It is important to note, the intelligence of SCP-EP-J instances are usually significantly lower than the average human being, usually asking for things that are impossible. Tantrums are highly common in situations where an SCP-EP-J-2 instance is present; when this happens, SCP-EP-J-1 instances will quickly start blaming their victims for it. It is usually at this time that authorities arrest the SCP-EP-J-1 instances - and SCP-EP-J-2 are sent to foster families, where the effects are mostly worn off.
Item #: SCP-EP-J
Object Class: Apollyon
Description: SCP-EP-J appears in three variants, SCP-EP-J-1, SCP-EP-J-2 and SCP-EP-J-3. It is very common to see all three types of SCP-EP-J together "as a family". SCP-EP-J instances are usually very confrontational and aggressive. It is recommended not to engage in conversation with SCP-EP-J instances - especially not SCP-EP-J-3 instances. At this time, it is unknown how a person becomes an SCP-EP-J instance. SCP-EP-J-1 instances are usually female, however it has been confirmed that males are susceptible to becoming SCP-EP-J-1 instances as well, though it is more likely for them to become SCP-EP-J-2 instances. SCP-EP-J-1 instances typically appear with the "I want to speak to your manager" haircut, which is very crucial to locating SCP-EP-J-1 instances. They usually are accompanied by SCP-EP-J-3 and SCP-EP-J-2 instances - however some SCP-EP-J-1 instances do not bring their designated SCP-EP-J-2 instances with them. SCP-EP-J-1 instances will usually start conversation with anybody they see as weak or vulnerable and will always attempt to take something or otherwise demand for something - and if the victim refuses, SCP-EP-J-3 will either cry or complain about it. It is also important to note, SCP-EP-J-3 instances are always children/infants and their behaviour is much like that of a spoiled brat. SCP-EP-J-2 instances "do anything" for their SCP-EP-J-1 and SCP-EP-J-3 instances, often becoming defensive. However sometimes SCP-EP-J-3 makes family with no SCP-EP-J-2 instances or use a normal male (though divorces are common if this happens).
Special Containment Procedures: There is no way to contain SCP-EP-J. It is a global threat that the Foundation does not have resources to prevent or contain without risking public awareness. It is believed that SCP-EP-J instances could end the world with their confrontational style as they could take advantage of "vulnerable" people and gain power. Power that can be abused.
WARNING: ALL SCP-EP-J INTERVIEWS HAVE BEEN CLASSIFIED TO LEVEL-2 PERSONNEL OR HIGHER!
ANY ATTEMPTS TO ACCESS THESE INTERVIEW LOGS WITHOUT PROPER CLEARANCE WILL RESULT IN TERMINATION BY MEMETIC KILL AGENT!
EDIT: BY ORDER OF O5-1, THE INTERVIEW LOG FOR SCP-EP-J-2 HAS BEEN REDACTED. UNREDACTED VERSION RESTRICTED TO LEVEL-3 OR ABOVE PERSONNEL ONLY.
Interview Log SCP-EP-J-1:
Checking clearance...
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Clearance Level-2 identified. Access granted. You may now proceed.
Interviewed: Karen
Interviewer: Doctor ██████
Foreword: Doctor ██████ attempted to engage in communication with Karen, a known SCP-EP-J-1 instance. The instance was very confrontational and Doctor ██████ ended the interview after giving up.
<Begin Log, 19:00>
Interviewer: Hello! Karen, how are you doing today?
Interviewee: How dare you kidnap me and my family like that! I will have you all arrested! My uncle works with the police!
Interviewer: Karen, please calm down. We just want to ask a few quick questions. We can assure you that you and your family will be-
Interviewee: No. No. You listen to me. If you don't release me and my family right now, I will call the cops on you!
Interviewer: I give up. Interview terminated.
<End Log, 19:02>
Closing Statement: Amnestics of Class-A strength were administered and Karen was returned back to her home. No more interviews with SCP-EP-J-1 instances will be conducted. By order of O5-1.
Interview Log SCP-EP-J-2:
Checking clearance...
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Clearance Level-2 identified. Access granted. You may now proceed.
Attention: Key parts of this interview log have been redacted for all personnel under clearance Level-3.
Interviewed: John
Interviewee: Senior Researcher ████
Foreword: Senior Researcher ████ asked John several questions, with the cover of a psychological study. He complied. He has informed us that SCP-EP-J-1 instances are formed by █████████ and their ███████████ - as well as ████████ ██████ in their life.
<Begin Log, 21:30>
Interviewer: Greetings. My name is ████. I am a senior researcher here. We would like to ask you a few questions - about your family. This is just a psychological study. If you answer all the questions, you and your family will receive a large amount of money.
Interviewee: As long as we're getting paid.
Interviewer: Okay. If you are ready, let's begin with the first question.
Interviewee: I'm ready.
Interviewer: Please remain passive. Anyway, question one, has your current wife's behaviour ever changed suddenly - for no apparent reason?
Interviewee: Hm. Well. I do remember, after our █████ █████ ████, she was a lot more confrontational and I can't seem to find out why. I always try to calm her down - but she just argues… I'm sorry. Can I please take a break of 5 minutes?
Interviewer: You may. Thank you - that helps us a lot.
<Pause Log, 21:35>
<Resume Log, 21:50>
Interviewer: So, are you ready yet? This seems to have been a lot longer than 5 minutes.
Interviewee appears to cry briefly.
Interviewee: I- Yes. I'm ready.
Interviewer: I know this may seem hard for you - but please. This is important. Think of how much this money could help you and your family out.
Interviewee: Yes. Yes. I'm ready, let's get this over with. NOW!
The interviewee became very defensive over his wife suddenly.
Interviewer: Relax please. I would like to ask you another question. Why do you still wish to stay with your wife - after her behaviour has changed so drastically to the woman you used to love?
Interviewee: I love that woman. She's a beauty. That wonderful beast.
Interviewer: Your behavour has changed - are you alright to continue?
Interviewee: Oh yes. We can talk about her all night.
Interviewer: We'll pick this up tomorrow.
<End Log, 22:10>
Closing Statement: Interview will be resumed tomorrow morning - in an attempt to restore John's passive state. Interview cancelled by O5-1.
Interview Log SCP-EP-J-3:
Checking clearance...
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Clearance Level-2 identified. Access granted. You may now proceed.
Interviewed: Jake
Interviewer: Doctor ██████
Foreword: Doctor ██████ had ended the interview after Jake threw a fit about not getting his doctor ID card.
<Begin Log, 22:00>
Interviewer: Hey, Jake, my name is-
Interviewee: Can I have your card? It looks cool. I want it. I want it NOW. GIVE IT TO ME!
Interviewer: Uh. No.
Interviewee: Screams and cries MOMMY! HE WON'T GIVE ME HIS CARD! I WANT IT!
Interviewer: F*ck this. Terminating the interview again.
<End Log, 22:02>
Closing Statement: Amnestics of Class-A strength were administered and Jake was returned back to her home. No more interviews with SCP-EP-J-3 instances will be conducted. By order of O5-1.
Hello everybody. My name is… well, let's just say it's "classified". Do not ask any questions, thanks. All of you are operatives of Mobile Task Force Alpha-1 "Red Right Hand". I don't care what division you are in; this is a global operation for the whole task force. Now, before I proceed further, I know some of you are forgetful. As a result, this briefing will be on the Foundation Archives, however, it will be redacted. This is the only time you will get to hear this while it is unredacted. So do yourself a favour and pay attention, and yes, the O5 council will be looking to remove any of you nitwits who are unable to follow this briefing to every exact detail. Alright, everybody got their notepads? You all ought to be taking notes!
We have located an instance of SCP-EP-J-1, SCP-EP-J-2 and SCP-EP-J-3. They are a "family". Now, our Karen over here is in a high-power government job. What job, you ask? Well, I'm not allowed to give you any details that cannot be proven relevant to this operation. Unfortunetly, this job provides her with a lot of power over some of our Foundation agents. To make matters worse, the SCP-EP-J-2 instance is a police chief. And many of our operatives hide among them. I'm sure most of you understand the problem. However, this is not the only issue. There are thousands of these cases globally, yes, you heard right, GLOBAL!
Well, let me show you just ONE of the thousands of other issues we have. See, here we have a phone tap of all incoming and outgoing calls from this phone number, belonging to an SCP-EP-J-1 instance. Here is a log. Those of you who are assigned to this operation will be told so next briefing. Oh and that briefing will NOT be available on Foundation Archives. Good luck. Anyway, here is the log.
Incoming Call [+44 ██████████] - IDENTIFIED AS SPOUSE
Hey, honey. Sorry, I might be coming home late. This guy thinks he owns the crime scene, even though I'm the chief. Going to go real hard on this guy.
Oh dear, it's fine, just make sure to give me a call if you need… BACKUP, HA HA HA HA. Oh, I'm so funny, right dear?
Yes… you sure are. Anyway. Bye. Honey, I'll try to get home before 9!
Call Ended
Incoming Text Messages Identified [+44 ██████████] - IDENTIFIED AS LOVER
Hey, love. Your bitch husband is putting me up the fucking wall. Can't do anything without his "problems". This hard man thinks he owns it ll being Chief of Police. Fuck him.
Don't worry. You're still my lover after all. Can't wait to cheat on that small dick bastard. He was only good for money anyway.
Chat Ended
Ehem. Now, the "lover" is an undercover Foundation operative. We can't talk about him though. All I know is a higher power, higher than the O5s brought him in. However, this briefing will not turn into a conspiracy and by extension, if I catch ANY of you discussing it, you will be terminated from your position in Alpha-1 and executed. Why executed? Because you know too much. You could leak to a GoI. Now while we have this operation ongoing, each and every one of you will be given an assignment tomorrow.
MTF Kesha-12 Logo
Task Force Mission: MTF Kesha-12 are responsible for assassination and suppression missions for the Foundation. Their job is to neutralise any non-SCP threats. Such as any people who are suspected of potentially leaking Foundation secrets. MTF Kesha-12 have access to any and all types of amnestics and memetic agents the Foundation has to offer as well as a large variety of firearms.
Operations:
All operations of MTF Kesha-12 are to be restricted to Level-5 personnel only.
If you are not Level-5, please do not access this.
Failure to comply will result in termination by memetic kill agent.
You have been warned.
> KILL AGENT ACTIVATED <
- CONTINUED LIFE SIGNS DETECTED -
ACCESS GRANTED
Alpha-16 "Red Flood"
Briefing: Good day all. I have been selected by your commander to lead this Operation Alpha-16, or "Red Flood". There are three main targets, all of which work for the Chaos Insurgency. Unfortunately, they have stolen some very important things from us during a raid at Site-██. They escaped Foundation forces at the time but have not had the chance to regroup with the rest of the Insurgency. Our job is to neutralise them before they can hand over our things to their commanders and the rest of the Insurgency. Failing this operation means the Insurgency gets a huge advantage over the Foundation. The Foundation is counting on Kesha-12 to deal with this threat. Good luck.
Status: Success. Targets eliminated. Items recovered.
Date/Time Completed: XX/XX/1998
ERROR
Briefing: ██ ████ ██ neutralise ███ ████████████ immediately. ██ ██ Site-01 ██ ████ ██ ████████ ███ ████ ███ Rēsh-1 and get to Him.
Status: DATA CORRUPT
Date/Time Completed: XX/XX/XXXX
Echo-19 "The Leftover Flames"
Briefing: Alright. Kesha-12, I'm here to brief you about Operation Echo-19 "The Leftover Flames". This needs to be done quickly so I will finish this as fast as I can. The Administrator himself, yes, THE Administrator has requested termination of the Ethics Committee Chairman. The Chairman has hidden somewhere in Site-19. He is guarded by the entirety of MTF Omega-1 "Law's Left Hand". Do not attack the Omega-1 operatives. We only want the Chairman taken out.
Status: Success. Target eliminated. Omega-1 surrendered to Kesha-12.
Date/Time Completed: XX/XX/2000
WARNING. THIS DOCUMENT IS HIGHLY CLASSIFIED AND IS ONLY TO BE READ BY O5-COMMAND. VIOLATORS WILL BE TERMINATED IMMEDIATELY.
Memetic agents activated.
Continued life signs detected.
Opening file.
Task Force Mission: Delta-19 is a mobile task force that is capable of removing dimensions. All members of this task force are anomalous but have proven loyalty to the Foundation and its cause. Should it be necessary, the Foundation will call upon Delta-19 to remove a dimension or world. It is worth noting that the Foundation cannot control or terminate members of Delta-19. So should any operatives go rogue, our dimension may be at risk of being destroyed or damaged. Delta-19 are kept in a secure location in ██████, ███████, United States deep underground. The location of which is classified and currently only the Administrator is aware of its position.
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-0000 cannot be contained. It is unknown how SCP-0000 manifests itself in subject.
Description: SCP-0000 is a hallucination that manifests in subjects who have not been productive enough during the day. This includes not going to work, not putting effort in work or not doing enough work. When SCP-0000 is manifested, the subject will immediately feel dread. It is at this time that any monitoring equipment in the area begins to malfunction. Interviews with subjects (Interview Log SCP-0000-1) has revealed that SCP-0000 will appear from in an area nearby where the subject does not have a clear line of sight. SCP-0000 will then proceed to move toward the subject. Asking subjects about its appearance has revealed that it is a 6′8″ pure-black humanoid. The entity does not have any color even when under heavy lighting. It is unknown what happens when SCP-0000 reaches the subject because subjects are unable to recall anything after it approaching them.
Interview Log SCP-0000-1:
Interviewed: D-9551
Interviewer: [Interviewer, can be blocked out using █]
Foreword: [Small passage describing the interview]
<Begin Log, [optional time info]>
Interviewer: [speech]
Person: [speech]
[Repeat as necessary]
<End Log, [optional time info]>
Closing Statement: [Small summary and passage on what transpired afterward]
