TheBlueHour 2

NOTICE FROM THE FOUNDATION RECORDS AND INFORMATION SECURITY ADMINISTRATION

The following article refers to a potential anomaly that may or may not posses unknown infohazardous properties. The information in this article is restricted to personnel directly working for RAISA and only on a need to know basis.

 

I'm not sure if anyone will find this.

— Maria Jones, Director, RAISA

Item #: SCP-5000

Object Class: Nemo¹

Special Containment Procedure: All Foundation documents are to be checked for instances of SCP-5000 and edited accordingly. A research team is to be formed in order to determine the origin of SCP-5000 if possible.

Description: SCP-5000 is a phenomenon in which Foundation documents will refer to the existence of a 'HMCL Supervisor'. There is currently no actual record of such a position existing at any known Foundation site. SCP-5000 is known to occur in all Foundation documents, but is especially prevalent in older documents that have not been updated to modern standards. SCP-5000 has been observed in all types of Foundation Documents but most commonly appears in containment documents for active SCPs. SCP-5000 occurs in 0.007% of Foundation documents.

Documents effected to SCP-5000 do not possess any known anomalous properties. Once the reference is removed from a document, it generally does not return. Documents effected with SCP-5000 are not known to possess any unusual or inaccurate properties beyond the mention of the HMCL Supervisor.

The cause of SCP-5000 is unknown and it is currently uncertain whether or not SCP-5000 can even be considered anomalous in the traditional sense. The meaning of HMCL supervisor is unknown and it is unclear what, if anything, the acronym stands for.

Addendum 5000-1: Researcher BLACKBOX Collin's journal

Several RAISA members were tasked by [REDACTED] with researching SCP-5000 and any other information on 'HMCL Supervisors'. Following the events of Incident-5000-0, Collins was found to have kept a journal. Excerpts are provided below.

01/13/2020: Today I was given a new assignment, I was really excited when I was given the assignment and learned it's number, SCP-5000. I thought it must be something important and secretive… instead it's just a minor anomaly they need a few RAISA guys (and girls) to deal with. Me, Mark and Ash have been assigned to look into it. I'd make a joke about how it seems like an easy job, but that's usually what low-level Foundation researchers say right before their torn apart by abominations from hell.

01/15/2020: Okay, so the three of us have started working on this but we don't have much to go on. We gathered up all of the SCP-5000 positive articles we have access to and now have to actually look through them. Our job would be a lot easier if half the scipnet database wasn't data expunged or redacteded. Something funny happened today. While searching through the articles we actually have access to i noticed this new header their using. The 'Anomaly Classification System' I'd never seen anything like it before in my life so I asked what it was about. Turns out I was literally the only one in the RAISA office who has never seen it before. Apparently their was a company wide email about it and everything. I have no clue how I missed that…

01/17/2020: So far no progress has been made. As far as we can tell there is no such thing as an 'HMCL Supervisor' position. From my search, SCP-2000 mentions ''HMCL Approval'', but that document is far, far outside of my clearance level. I tried asking the Site Director, but it's outside her level to… I'm not even sure I want to know what it is.

01/17/2020: My wife came back but she was still dead. The left half of her face was missing and I could see the worms and maggots eating her brain. I made her waffles and we had breakfast on the pier as the sun rose.

01/18/2020: Okay, things are going a bit better now but not by much. Ash did a bit of sleuthing and she figured out that the earliest mentions of SCP-5000 all come from documents relating to anomalies from Site-19. We currently don't know if that means anything or not. Lot's of shit seems to come from Site-19 so it might be nothing. Or maybe it's nothing.

I was walking earlier today, I needed to clear my mind, while I was… this is weird. I walked past some fire-hydrants which were painted grey. I've walked that route literally hundreds of times in my life and this is the first time I've noticed. Still probably nothing.

01/18/2020:

01/19/2020: Things are getting stranger but I guess that's just par for course with this line of work. When I woke up this morning I felt so sick I had to call out of work. I puked twice before I even made it downstairs to the kitchen. Adams chewed me out, but I ignored her and went back to bed. So soon after I woke up and I could hear voices nearby. I think I heard my name a dew times but other than that I couldn't make anything out. Now, of course I assumed it was just a dream but [Here several lines are blacked out by a pen]

1/20/2020: I asked the rest of the team if they were having any issues but they were fine. They didn't see feel any worse than usual. I think it's probably just me then. I guess I'll be careful and ask to leave this project if things get too bad.

+ show block

Investigation: On 12/13/2019, Researcher Blackbox Collins and Researcher Blackbox Adams were assigned to SCP-5000 in order to research and find the origin of SCP-5000 before being disbanded following incident SCP-5000-0 and [DATA EXPUNGED]. Documents related to their investigation are provided below:

The first thing I would like to say is that I really was trying to save Collins, just maybe not in the way he needed.

RESEARCH LOG SCP-5000-1

---

[[Begin Log]]

Researcher Collins: Any updates so far.

Researcher Adams: Not much, I can't seem to find much information, partially because the Foundation is so good at hiding information from its own employees.

Researcher Collins: Do you have anything yet?

Adams: Er… not really. So far I've compiled every SCP-5000 effected document I have access to. But that's about it.

Collins: Let's take a look.

//Adams takes out a stack of documents and passes them to Collins. Collins looks at the topmost page with obvious confusion.

Collins: What the Hell is that at the top of the page?

Adams: That's the Anomaly Classification System, it's a new header for Foundation Documents their trying out.

Collins: It looks like shit.

Adams: I actually think it's a pretty good way to show information quickly.

Collins: This is the first time I've seen it and I already hate it?

Adams: First time? Really, I see this all over the place now.

Collins: Really? How could… never mind let me just look.

Collins looks over the document.

Collins: This is… exactly what I've seen before.

Addendum 5000-1: On 12/11/2019, Researcher Collins entered Site-19 in order to search for information relating to SCP-5000.

Interview Log SCP-5000-1

Adams: You okay Collins?

Collins: Yeah, just haven't been getting enough sleep. I've been kind of busy in this.

Adams: That… doesn't sound very healthy.

Collins: Don't have much of a choice here, we're kind of behind right now… You sure that Anomaly Classification System thing has been around for awhile? I literally never saw it before you showed me.

Adams: Yeah, they even had a department wide email about it.

Collins: I must have missed it then… Hey Adams.

Adams: Yeah?

Collins: Did you ever realize just how many reality bending skips their are.

Adams: Yeah?

Collins: And how many that can tear logic and reason up like toilet paper.

Adams: Where are you going with us?

Collins: So… what makes you think we can actually trust reality?

Adams: …What?

Collins: I mean, if we have confirmation that reality isn't constant, what makes you think it hasn't been changed already?

Adams: It probably has been.

The wind can be heard blowing nearby.

Collins: I was thinking about this SCP-5000 thing and I was… I started wondering. Do you think it's like… an artifact of some sort? Like, something somehow left over from a reality that existed before reality changed?

Adams: Uh… that feels like… a bit of a stretch to me.

Addendum 5000-2: Selected Entries from Researcher Collin's Journal:

01/13/2020: Nothing much tonight.

01/14/2020: Nothing much tonight.

01/15/2020: My dead cat visited me tonight. I saw her at the foot of my bed. I couldn't move but when I saw her I felt calm. The left half of her face was missing, i could see the maggots crawling in her brain.

01/16/2020: Nothing much tonight.

01/17/2020: I was in the office working on my laptop. I can hear Adams and Christie neerby but I can't see them. I'm typing, but the words on the screen are pure nonsense, and they changed whenever I wasn't paying attention.

DATE: 01/01/2020

[BEGIN LOG]

Researcher Collins: Have you ever wondered if the universe is a simulation?

Dr. Emerson: That would make more sense than the universe just being as illogical as the Foundation believes it is. Why ask though?

Collins: I… don't know. Just… an observation I guess. It's… hard to explain. Ever since about… about a month ago, a little before I started on the SCP-5000 investigation…

Emerson: A little before you began.

Collins: Yeah, I think… it was a bit more than a week before we began. I woke up and I just felt awful like the world was ending or something. I think I almost threw up just trying to get breakfast.

Emerson: Do you mean you felt ill physically or emotionally.

Collins: Both.

Emerson: Did you see a doctor?"

Collins: Other than you right now, no. I don't think so at least.

Emerson: You don't ''think'' so?

Collins: Yeah, I think. After what's been happening to me recently I can't tell anymore. I feel like I'm either losing my mind or have already… that would make more sense actually.

A bird flies past a nearby window causing both Collins and Emerson to jump.

Collins: I feel like… any second everything is going to fall apart.

Emerson: What do you think is going to happen?

Collins: That's the thing, I can't say I just… I just can't shake the feeling that any second something awful is going to happen.

Their is a faint tapping noise from outside the window. Collins turns towards it sharply appearing distressed. Emerson walks over to the window and closes the curtain.

Collins: I barely feel like I can function anymore… even getting mail makes me feel like I'm going to vomit.

Emerson writes something on her clipboard, the curtain shifts slightly.

Emerson: Are you on any medication?

Collins: I'm taking some pills for high blood pressure but nothing for mental issues.

Emerson: It's starting to sound to me like you have an anxiety disorder, would you agree with that?

Collins: I… think I would. Is there anything you could do?

Emerson: Well, I can prescribe some medicine and you could get some more therapy.

Collins: I think that would be a good idea.

The curtain is abruptly pulled open. Collins and Emerson turn to look outside the window.

[END LOG]

Note: [DATA EXPUNGED]

Incident Report 5000-0:

---

Forward: The following was reconstructed from security footage and eye-witness testimony.

---

Researcher Collins is in his room. He is sitting on his bed. He makes several quick glances out his window. Nothing is visible outside.

After a few minutes the door creaks open and Researcher Adams steps inside, looking concerned.

Adams: Still alive?

Collins: Barely.

Adams: Come on.

Collins: Where are we going?

Adams: We're going to get help for you.

Collins: I already tried that.

Adams: Come on.

Adams grabs Collin's hand and pulls him to his feat and they begin walking towards the door.

Collins: Let's get this over with…

Adams and Collins enter a hallway outside Collin's door. Thunder can be heard somewhere nearby.

They leave the building and exit outside. The sky is heavily overcast and a wind is blowing. Black birds are circling in the sky. Adams gets into his car and Collins follows.

The car pulls out of the driveway and continues down the street.

Aftermath: Researcher Collins was captured by Foundation forces by [REDACTED]. After being administered amnestics and given several months of therapy, he made a full recovery and is scheduled to return to work on 01/13/2021. The fate of Researcher Adams remains unknown.

##
- Researcher Stella Adams##

Atlantis or the lack-thereof

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX cannot be contained and does not need to be contained and may in fact not be anomalous in the traditional sense. No special containment procedures are currently necessary. Any updates to information on SCP-XXXX is to be reported to Site-169 immediately.

Description: SCP-XXXX is the fact that Atlantis does not exist.

Discovery: SCP-XXXX was first noted by Charles Fairchild, a Foundation Researcher specializing in underwater archaeology, in 1999. Upon being promoted to Senior Researcher at Site-169, Fairchild was granted access to Site-169's full database of oceanic anomalies. After checking through all available documents, Fairchild noticed SCP-XXXX and brought it to the attention of Sie-169's operating staff. Since it could not be confirmed whether or not SCP-XXXX was actually an anomaly no document was created at the time. However Fairchild was given permission to research further into the phenomenon. After confirming the nonexistence of any information about Atlantis or related phenomenon in any Foundation database, he created this document as a placeholder for what, if any, applicable information would be found.

Addendum XXXX-1, Creation of MTF Nu-13 'Platonic Solids'

On March 1st, 2001, Fairchild requested the creation of a MTF unit specifically for the search for Atlantis. This request was granted on March 16th.

Designation: Nu-13

Role: Nu-13 is to be created for the purpose of researching information on the supposed extinct civilization 'Atlantis' mentioned by the Ancient Greek Philosopher Plato.

Formation: Due to the low priority of Nu-13's mission, it is only to be composed of five members.

• Researcher Amelia Jones, Project lead.

• Senior Researcher Charles Farichild, Archaeology expert.

• Researcher Celie Drake, Oceanology expert.

• Researcher Amantha Walker, Drone Operation expert

• Agent Michelle Stevenson, Underwater Diving Expert

Mission Parameters:

Addendum XXXX-2, Nu-13 findings

Over the course of four months, Nu-13 performed extensive investigations into the possible location or history of Atlantis. All available Foundation documents, historical documents, nonanomalous scientific research and documents from the Serpent's Library were checked for possible references. Additionally, underwater drones and satellite imagery was used to make a complete map of all likely sites for the location of Atlantis in the Atlantic Ocean. the Pacific Ocean and several land based archaeological sites were also investigated at this time.

Nu-13 Mission Conclusion

---

Nu-13 has been in operation for five months and in that time we have performed extensive research into every available lead. We even checked the Wanderer's Library and contacts in the Serpent's Hand who were willing to cooperate. All available technology was utilized for this mission and we even borrowed Site-169's drones and satellite imaging to create our own underwater map. After one of the most extensive investigations I have ever been involved in I have come to a conclusion. There is precisely zero evidence that Atlantis or any similar undiscovered civilization exists. I must strongly recommend that this project be cancelled immediately and I would also like to request to be transferred to a different project as soon as feasible. I'm sorry for the waste of Foundation time and resources, but there is nothing there.

- Amelia Jones

Following this Nu-13 was disbanded and all further investigation into SCP-XXXX or related phenomenon was cancelled.

The Ghost Train Has No Breaks

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Keter Archon

Special Containment Procedures: Knowledge of SCP-XXXX's existence is not to be supressed. Instead, a disinformation campaign presenting SCP-XXXX as being an urban legend is to be created. Foundation webcrawlers are to monitor web-traffic for references to SCP-XXXX and disinformation is to be used to either present the information as hoaxes or remove it. Individuals confirmed to have been effected by SCP-XXXX are to be amnestized.

Description: SCP-XXXX refers to an anomalous phenomenon that effects individuals in the Delmarva Peninsula in the United States. SCP-XXXX effects individuals at random, only individuals who are outdoors will be effected. SCP-XXXX most commonly effects individuals who are alone, but is also capable of effecting individuals in small groups under rare occasions. SCP-XXXX has never been known to manifest when more than six individuals are present.

When an individual first becomes effected by SCP-XXXX they will begin to hear the sound of a distant train. This noise is not audible to recording equipment or other nearby people. Over the next several seconds the sound will appear to increase in volume to the effected individual. If the effected person stops walking, the noise will gradually die down before disapearing. Otherwise, after approximately ten seconds, the effected person will die in a manner consistent with being struck by a moving train. This is an incredibly violent event and often results in the victims body being thrown or dragged to the right at high speeds and scattered over a wide area. While none of the surroundings will be directly effected, often nearby individuals and objects will be damaged by bone shards or impact with the fast moving remains.

History: SCP-XXXX is believed to have first manifested in 1953, shortly after the crash of the BLACKBOX train in Central Maryland.

The City

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX cannot currently be fully contained. Foundation webcrawlers are to monitor web-traffic for evidence of SCP-XXXX and to close discussions on it. Individuals confirmed to have been effected by SCP-XXXX are to be amnestized and local hospitals are to be checked for further evidence of SCP-XXXX.

NOTE: Foundation personal should note that the claims in the following document can not be verified and may not represent actual reality.

Description: SCP-XXXX to a an anomalous cityscap. Individuals who have recieved a first hand account of SCP-XXXX from an individual who has experienced it directally will, at apparant random, be transported to the city before usually returning to earth several hours later. This phenomenon is rarely fatal, however injuries sustained in SCP-XXXX persist on earth. The rate at which an individual enters SCP-XXXX will increase over time, until after appproximately three years they will exoerience transportation to SCP-XXXX at least once every day.

The Secret Occult Power of the Nazis

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: All SCP-XXXX items are to be stored in a medium security anomalous storage warehouse in Site-169.

Description: SCP-XXXX refers to a series of anomalous artifacts recovered from the home of William BLACKBOX, an amateur occultist with ties to the Neo-Nazi and Far Right movements, and the BLACKBOX graveyard in . Most objects associated with SCP-XXXX have been linked to the historical Nazi Party. Objects include:

1. 25 kg of a viscous black substance found in a crater in the center of the BLACKBOX graveyard. This substance displays no overt anomalous properties but is highly toxic and contains substances not naturally found on earth.
2. An SS pin which, when worn, causes an antimemetic effect which makes the wearer immpossible to remember or percive, including by themselves. This often resulst in the effected individuals death as they are incapable of eating, drinking or remembering that they need to do so.
3. A Nordic Rune Stone with the rune for lighting written on it. When exposed to human blood, a lightning bolt will be summoned somewhere within a hundred mile radius around the stone.
4. A glass sphere full of mercury. When touched it will briefly illuminate and float several centimeters above the ground.

Discovery: On June 1st. 2013 an explosion occured at the BLACKBOX Cemetary. A police investigation was undertaken and after possible anomalous activity was reported, the investigation was taken over by the Foundation and security footage tapes were seized. Three bodies were recovered at the site, all of which were identified as former members of the Neo-Nazi group 'The Aryan Brotherhood of Virginia.' The home of one of the idenified individuals was raided and the SCP-XXXX objects were recoverd from there. Furthermore, his personel computer was checked and on it were located emails detailing a coorespondence between Wiliam and an unknown individual designated POI-1883. Immportant emails are transcribed below.

To: [REDACTED]

From: William BLACKBOX

Subject: Occult
I got the Nazu stuff that you sent me. We tried some of it but it doesn't really seem to be doing much or is actually hurting us. Fuck, I stilll don't know where Johny². Do you got anything better then this stuff? We can't win a race war with this garbage.

To: William BLACKBOX

From: [REDACTED]

Sorry about that man, this 'anomaly' junk can be a bit hard to master. Tell you what though, I have a spell book penned by an actual Nazi Occultist. I can sell it to you for only 250. You know how to get in touch if that's what you want.

The Museum That Kills You

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Thaumial

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be barred from entry by the public. Once per week a D-Class personnel is to be sent into SCP-XXXX then recovered after they exit the building.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a small building in the city of Aberdeen, South Dakota. A sign at the front of the building lists it as "The Museum of Killing you and Queen of Hearts Coffee shop." SCP-XXXX is not anomalous but contains many anomalies including an anomalous entity referred to as SCP-XXXX-1. SCP-XXXX-1 is a hispanic male human. SCP-XXXX-1 claims to be immortal but has displayed no anomalous properties other then an apparent immunity to the anomalous objects contained in SCP-XXXX.

SCP-XXXX contains an unknown number anomalous objects displayed in glass cases. All of these objects are known or suspected to have lethal anomalous abilities.

Discovery: SCP-XXXX came to the Foundation's attention when BLACKBOX BLACKBOX, a man living in Aberdeen, died under mysterious circumstances. Autopsies confirmed that his organs had been removed and his body cavity was filled with lemons. A brochure from SCP-XXXX was found in his pocket and MTF field agenst were dispatched to the adress listed on the Brochure. SCP-XXXX-1 greated the agents at the door to SCP-XXXX apparently under the mistaken belief that they were attempting to order coffe. However the agents shot it with tranquilizer darts and he fell unconscious with minimal resistance. SCP-XXXX-1 was removed from the building, however after it was taken past the doorframe it vanished. SCP-XXX-1 was found in a back storage room of SCP-XXXX-1 minutes later. The following interview was recorded by MTF Agent Malcom BLACKBOX's body camera.

Interviewed: SCP-XXXX-1

Interviewer: Agent Malcolm BLACKBOX

<Begin Log]>

SCP-XXXX-1: What the Hell was that for?

Malcolm: Sorry, sir. You learn to not take chances in this line of work. I see that you're fine now.

SCP-XXXX-1: I'm immortal. Not much can really hurt me.

Agent Malcilm: Interesting, would you mind if I asked you some questions.

SCP-XXXX-1: You shot me.
Agent Malcolm: That was a mistake, I was simply trying to avoid having my organs replaced with lemons.

SCP-XXXX-1: That's what you're here about? I mean, I pity the guy but it's not fault he ate some candy under a fucking sign that said 'Do not eat' after I explicitly told him not to eat it.

Agent Malcolm: The candy kills you here?

SCP-XXXX-1: Everything but the cofee and pastries kills you here. Now get the fuck out of my coffee shop.

Abandoned Warehouse

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be closed to the public and surrounded with barbed wire fencing. MTF Sigma-13 'Divorce' are to monitor SCP-XXXX at all times.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a warehouse in BLACKBOX, Montanna. SCP-XXXX uses electrical devices such as lighting but does not take in electricity from any utility company. Other than this SCP-XXXX is not anomalous, however it contains multiple low threat anomalies.

The most notable anomaly in SCP-XXXX is SCP-XXXX-1, a sentient humanoid entity. SCP-XXXX-1 appears to be a patch of shadow in the rough shape of a human, it is capable of existing in a three dimensional shape or a two dimensional shape similar to a nonanomalous shadow. At rare instants words reading "Mr. Shadow, from Little Misters ® by Dr. Wondertainment" is visible on SCP-XXXX-1 in bright white lettering, but otherwise SCP-XXXX-1 is completely featureless.

SCP-XXXX contains many other minor anomalies, a truncated list of which is included below.

Name3	Description	Note
Dr Wondertainment's Super Squirt Gun	Several hundred purple and yellow water guns that displayed no obvious anomalous properties.
The Little Misters Action Show	A DVD including a thirty minute cartoon involving several anomalous entities linked to Dr. Wondertainment. The quality of the animation and voice acting is extremely low but possess no anomalous effects.
Art Time Fun Candy	Several dozen bags of multi-colored hard candy which, when ingested, caused an individual to painfully transform into a human sized wooden art doll over the course of thirty minutes. In 80% of cases the effect reversed after 2 hours.
DO NOT SELL	A dozen Pretendos including two which were in a previously unseen gold color.	Included in the crate was a note stating "This is why we don't make video games Jeremy".
None	Hundreds of parts apparently for toy robots. Most of the parts were broken.
Overseer-Five Command Adventure Set	A boxed set containing fifteen action figures, thirteen of which are accurate representatives of the acting O5 council as of September 2005 and two were of men in MTF Alpha-1 uniforms.
None	Several industrial containers full of orange and purple glitter
Vat Grown Organs	Various human body parts stored in plastic bags all of which displayed evidence of mutation.	This crate was found in a cold storage unit in the back of the warehouse.

Addendum: On August 7th, 2009, Researcher Grooms recorded the following interview log with SCP-XXXX-1

Interviewed: SCP-XXXX-1

Interviewer: Researcher Michael Grooms

<Begin Log]>

Grooms: Thank you for coming to speak with me today.

SCP-XXXX-1: No problem sir. It's always nice to see some new people. Usually the only guys who drop by are the people dropping of stuff to store here.

Grooms: You're one of the Little Misters? I never saw anything about you.

SCP-XXXX-1: Yeah, I got cancelled before Wondertainment finalized the line. They thought I was too scary. Of course, they didn't have a problem with the actual Mr. Scary. Hehe….

Grooms: You don't sound happy about this decision.

SCP-XXXX-1: It would have been cool to be an official Mister, but it's not a big deal. I understand the decision even if I don't agree with it.

SCP-XXXX-1 shrugs

Grooms: So what's this place then?

SCP-XXXX-1: Oh this? This is one of Dr. Wondertainment's long term storage facilities. It's used to contain stuff they don't need anymore like cancelled products or parts from old experiments.
Grooms: Makes sense, but what about the human body parts.

SCP-XXXX-1 laughs.
SCP-XXXX-1: Let's just say it took Dr. Wondertainment a few tries before he perfected his cloning technology. He actually had to outsource that part of the process to those other guys before for his doctor kit… things."

Grooms: How about you did he…

SCP-XXXX-1: Oh me, Wondertainment needed someone to watch this place. I didn't have anything else to do so I volunteered.

Grooms: Ah!

SCP-XXXX-1: It's okay I guess. Not everyone can make it to the big leagues.

Grooms: I suppose not.

SCP-XXXX-1: You know what the thing is though?

Grooms: What?

SCP-XXXX-1: They replaced me with Mr. Fish!

Grooms: Wow…

SCP-XXXX-1: Yeah, they replaced me with a fish-headed guy who doesn't even have any powers!

Grooms: Oh deer… anything we can do to help you?

SCP-XXXX-1: Hm… I don't think so but the offer is appreciated.

Grooms: Well, I'll be back sometime. See if you think of anything by then.

Grooms: Before you go doc, you agree with me right?

SCP-XXXX-1: Uh… Yeah… sure.

SCP-XXXX-1: Thanks man.

Researcher Grooms turns to leave.

SCP-XXXX-1: I mean, come on what were they thinking. I mean… me being too scary? What would make them think that.

Grooms: You seem fine to me, but really I must be going.

SCP-XXXX-1: Yeah, that's just what I'm saying.

Closing Statement: Researcher Grooms returned to a Foundation facility without further incident. Research into SCP-XXXX and any possible contained anomalies is ongoing.

Playing With Fire

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Apollyon

Special Containment Procedures: All attempts to prevent the spread of information about SCP-XXXX have failed. No possible way of containing SCP-XXXX has been discovered following the GOC's failure to engage SCP-XXXX militarily. Possible ways of preventing a SK-class Dominance Shift Scenario are presented in the Addendum to this document.

Description: SCP-XXXX refers to a hostile extrasolar government which controls much of the Milky Way Galaxy. SCP-XXXX is currently attempting to annex human civilization into its polity which would be considered a SK-Class 'Dominance Shift' scenario. In order to accomplish this SCP-XXXX has destroyed all human made objects outside the orbital radius of the moon and have blockaded planet earth. Currently the Foundation is attempting to negotiate with SCP-XXXX.

I stole this from Dr. Magnus

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: Anne Arundel county is to be monitored at all times for evidence of SCP-XXXX-A or SCP-XXXX-B instances. When an individual affected by SCP-XXXX is discovered the following procedures are to be performed.
1. The instance is to be detained and moved to Site-113.
2. The instance is to be studied to determine if it still possesses a functioning brain.
3. If the existence of a functioning brain is confirmed the instance is to be considered an SCP-XXXX-A instance and moved to Site-113's humanoid containment building.
4. If no conclusive evidence of a functioning brain is determined the instance is to be considered a SCP-XXXX-B instance. All SCP-XXXX-B instances are to be terminated via poisonous gas, incinerated and their ashes mixed in with concrete blocks. These blocks are to be shipped to Site-██ for disposal in the magma chamber of the [REDACTED] volcano.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a phenomenon effecting the Anne Arundel County region in which an individual's organs, muscles and bones will be replaced with masses of centipedes in the rough shape of them. Humans effected by this phenomenon are refereed to as either SCP-XXXX-A or SCP-XXXX-B depending on how the SCP-XXXX phenomenon develops.

• In 95% of cases, the phenomenon starts by effecting patches of the individuals skin and bones and gradually effects the major organs until all bodily structures except the brain are replaced with masses of centipedes. The brain is never effected in this case and the instances are refereed to as SCP-XXXX-A.
• In the remaining cases SCP-XXXX starts by replacing the brain with a mass of centipedes and rapidly effects the rest of the body. These instances are refereed to as SCP-XXXX-B.

The nature of SCP-XXXX and how it effects individuals is unknown, however it is confirmed to be noninfectious. SCP-XXXX-A instances retain their original faculties with the exception that SCP-XXXX never becomes a cause of alarm for them and has only limited mental side effects. Noneffected humans are incapable of perceiving effected individuals as being composed of centipedes.

Discovery: SCP-XXXX first came to the Foundation's attention in June, 1990 when an SCP-XXXX-A instance reported itself to a local doctors office complaining about its condition. Upon examining the individual, the doctors sent it to a psyche ward. The Foundation was aware of the incident, but after a brief investigation was taken concluded that it was simply a mental disorder. However, over the course of the next decade sixteen more cases were reported. An investigation was launched by the Foundation under the mistaken belief that SCP-XXXX was a memetic effect which caused individuals to falsely believe they were composed of centipedes. '

Several individuals were brought in for questioning, amnestized via injection and released. However, the individuals retained their memories despite being amnestized. Researcher Grooms, an assistant researcher assigned to the case, first theorized the notion that the SCP-XXXX-A's instances claims were true. He reasoned that the injectable amnestics were ineffective because the needle could only penetrate a small number of centipedes at a time. After it was determined that amnestic gas was effective, the theory that the SCP-XXXX-A instances genuinely were composed of centipedes was further investigated. After extensive testing using mnestic drugs and other paratechnologies, it was confirmed to be true.

Addendum:

+ Video Log XXXX-1

Interview Log XXXX-1

Interviewed: John █████████, an SCP-XXXX-A instance.

Interviewer: Researcher ███████ Grooms.

Foreword: John was taken into Foundation custody on 11/03/2003. After being checked to confirm that he was an SCP-XXXX-A instance he was interviewed by Researcher Grooms.

<Begin Log, 8:47 11/05/2003>

Grooms: Hello, Mr. █████████. I am Researcher Grooms, part of the team working on finding a solution to your problem. Now, please explain everything you remember.

SCP-XXXX-A: Thanks man. Okay, so this whole thing started one morning. So, I woke up and I felt… kind of odd but not really in a bad way. I tried to fall back to sleep, but I was feeling thirsty so I wanted to get up. I sat up and happened to look at my hand and there were centipedes under my skin.

Grooms: Under your skin?

SCP-XXXX-A: Yeah, man. they were kind of just squirming there like they were trapped in something. I thought it was weird but didn't think to much of it.
Grooms: It did not concern you?

SCP-XXXX-A: Like I said, I did think it was weird. But it didn't really hurt or anything so I just ignored it. Anyway, I got some water and then went to my mom and showed my hand to her. I asked if she'd seen anything like it before. She got kind of mad and said I was fine, I didn't know she couldn't see them. So I went back to bed as I didn't have to work that day, but by then there seemed to be a lot more centipedes. Like, they'd taken up most of my hand. I got back to bed and managed to fall asleep.

Grooms: Did you have any strange dreams?

SCP-XXXX-A: Nope. I slept like a baby. When I woke up again though I had to use the restroom. When I was walking there I saw that the centipedes had spread up my arm, almost to my shoulder. And then when I took my pants down to pee I saw that my…
SCP-XXXX-A glances down at its pants.
SCP-XXXX-A: …had been mostly replaced with centipedes.

Grooms: And this was no cause for alarm for you?

SCP-XXXX-A: I mean, my mom had said I was fine. It was pretty weird though, you see… I don't think you want to hear actually.
Grooms: I must ask you to please not continue this line of discussion.
SCP-XXXX-A: So I left the bathroom. I had a thing with my girlfriend, Julie █████████, planned, but I decided to call her to cancel 'cause what girl would be into that?
Researcher Grooms retches. SCP-XXXX-A appears agitated, this is one of only a few incidents of SCP-XXXX-A instances appearing distressed from their condition.

SCP-XXXX-A: But we made plans to hang out for dinner on… ah shit. That was supposed to be today.⁴

SCP-XXXX-A: So where was I? I decide to have a doctor do a quick check on me just in case. I didn't want mom to know I was getting looked at 'cause she might get mad so I took my car down to the doctor's office. I didn't tell him anything except that I was feeling a little weird. He looked over me and said I was completely healthy. After that I thought that if the doctor thought I was good, I was good. So on the way out I stopped by the doctors office bathroom.

SCP-XXXX-A: I looked at my face in the mirror just to see. At first, I looked the same as always except my face was… quivering? Kind of like what happens when you strike Jell-O. But then my face like broke apart and underneath it was all just masses and masses of centipedes. My eyeballs were there a bit longer, but then they kind of burst open leaking this gross clear gunk and underneath they were just centipedes curled up around each other into balls. And all I could say was 'cool'.
Grooms: You still weren't alarmed?

SCP-XXXX-A: I thought the doctor would have caught it if it was really something to worry about, and again, it didn't hurt.

Grooms: So… never mind. Is there anything that you would like to tell us? Remember, the more information we have the more likely it will be that we can find a way to reverse this.

SCP-XXXX-A: Hm… wait! I remember. About ten years ago, I was biking home from school, and a saw a silver disk fly out of a nearby field and shoot up into the sky!

Grooms: Uh… what's that have to do with your current condition?

SCP-XXXX-A: You guys are like the Men in Black right? I just thought that you'd want to know.

Grooms: No, thank you for your time though.

Grooms extends his arm, apparently about to shake SCP-XXXX-A's hand but then changes his mind.
<End Log>

Closing Statement: SCP-XXXX-A was moved into the care of site-113's humanoid containment facility. His mother, Rachel █████████, was later declared class C personnel and permanently moved to the site as well.

Update, 01/06/2004

The following video log was made shortly after the initial discovery of the first SCP-XXXX-B instance.

+ Video Log XXXX-1

[REDACTED]

Infinite Shakespeare

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be stored in a standard anomalous item locker in Site-169. Tests on SCP-XXXX may be performed with the permission of the Site Director.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a 1961 IBM Selectric Typewriter. It shows no signs of age but otherwise appears identical to a nonanomalous typewriter. When an individual presses any of the keys on SCP-XXXX, they will instantaneously vanish and will reappear in a nearby location after a variable amount of time.

While a person is under the effect of SCP-XXXX, they exist in a room in an unknown location. The room has no visible walls, a blue carpeted floor and a roof with innumerable bright overhead lights located ten feat above the floor. The room contains a vast amount of desks at each of which sits a monkey working at a typewriter. In addition to the monkeys at the typewriters, small monkeys with carts walk around the room collecting the pages from the monkey's typewriters and taking them to an unknown location. The room also contains a monkey designated SCP-XXXX-A who is capable of speech⁵. SCP-XXXX can communicate with anyone who enters the room regardless of their spoken language. If a person who has entered the room presses any button on any typewriter they will immediately be returned to normal reality standing next to SCP-XXXX.

Addendum:

On 09/12/2015, Researcher Grooms volunteered to utilize SCP-XXXX to try to communicate with SCP-XXXX-A. He activated the anomaly at 9:30 AM and reapeared a short time later.

+ Video Log XXXX-1

Interview Log XXXX-1
Researcher Grooms appears in the room and quickly spots SCP-XXXX-A observing the other monkeys at work.

Researcher Grooms: Are you SCP-XXXX-A?

SCP-XXXX-A: I was last time I checked, but around here I go by Argax. What do you want?

Researcher Grooms: Are you in charge here?

SCP-XXXX-A: I may be. Depends on whose asking.

Researcher Grooms: In that case may I ask a few questions?

SCP-XXXX-A: No.

Researcher Grooms: This will be quick, we just want to know more about the operation you've got going on here.

SCP-XXXX-A: Why would you want to know anything about this place. And why are you recording this?

Researcher Blank: I am simply a scientist who is cataloguing a new phenomenon that could potentially revolutionize our understanding of the universe. What is this place?

SCP-XXXX-A: This is the Infinite Monkey Room. Its exactly what it looks like.

Researcher Grooms: But why does it exist? Where did it come from. No one ever asks that about our skips⁶ and this time I'm curious.

SCP-XXXX-A: But why would you… fine. This room was built in order to create every possible book, who do you think stocks all those interdimensional libraries anyway [Link to the SCPs in question during the final draft]? There are an infinite amount of monkeys here so every book that could possibly exist is being created here every single second.

Researcher Grooms: But why not use humans or something that actually knows what they're doing?

SCP-XXXX-A: Because monkeys can't count so you don't have to pay them as much! Its a cost cutting mechanism which, spread over the infinite space this room occupies, results in infinite savings.

Researcher Grooms: Okay, but couldn't there be an easier way to do this?

SCP-XXXX-A: I think that you're underestimating the power of infinite monkeys. Zo, a demonstration please… Thanks Zo! Here, read this.

Researcher Grooms: That monkey had wings why… huh… what? This was created by monkeys randomly slamming on a typewriter.

SCP-XXXX-A: Yep. That's kind of how it's supposed to work.

Researcher Grooms: Thank you sir, may I ask one more question? How do you clean up all the poop? Infinite monkeys must result in infinite poop right? How do you keep this place clean?

SCP-XXXX-A: Well uh… I don't know actually.

Below is a transcript of the documents that SCP-XXXX-A gave to Researcher Grooms

[[collapsible show="+ Recovered Document XXXX-1" hide="- Recovered Document XXXX-1"]]
There was a flash of light and Researcher Michael Grooms materialized in the Infinite Monkey Chamber. The first thing he noticed was the smell, infinite monkey odor was rather harsh to the nose. Researcher Grooms stepped forward and glanced around the infinitely massive chamber that he had found himself in while trying to avoid breathing in too much of the air. He looked to his left and saw Argax standing with his clipboard in hand observing the monkeys at work and lightly tapping himself on the hip with a pen. As Researcher Grooms stepped forward though, Argax heard him and turned around to face the Foundation scientist.

"Are you SCP_XXXX_A?" Researcher Grooms asked the monkey. It turned to him with an annoyed look.

"I was last time I checked, but around here I go by Argax. What do you want?"

—

+ Recovered Document ShoopDaWhoop

I looked away from the website that was eating up too much of my attention and forced myself to continue writing my SCP. I hesitate for a few moments as I try to think of what to write. As usual, the words come to my mind slowly, but eventually I managed to put some words down on the glowing screen: "There was a flash of light and Researcher Blankity Blank appeared in the Infinite Monkey Chamber."

+ Recovered Document ShoopDaWhoop

I

—

Einstein's Wall

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Archon⁷

Special Containment Procedures: The existence of SCP-XXXX is common knowledge and is universally documented and understood to exist by the academic community. These are not considered cause for concern as SCP-XXXX is falsely believed to be nonanomalous by the general public. No attempt to contain or neutralize SCP-XXXX is to be carried out in any capacity.

Description: SCP-XXXX refers to the impossibility of information to be transmitted faster than light by nonanomalous means. SCP-XXXX was first theorized by Albert Einstein in 1905 as one of the two postulates of General Relativity. SCP-XXXX's existence was later confirmed by multiple experiments performed over the course of several decades. Since at this time their was no evidence that SCP-XXXX was an anomalous phenomenon, no action was undertaken by the Foundation or any other Group of Interest.

However, in 1978 evidence was found by GOC research teams pointing to the possibility of SCP-XXXX possibly being an anomalous phenomenon. After extensive archaeological research, the remains of a 1963 manuscript were discovered in the residencet of a deceased Orothan mystic.

… Now in those days travel through the [spheres?] was not limited as it is now. The Koru-teusa were all alive in those days and could travel between worlds as easily as a human could cross a room. Other [spheres?] could reach each other and trade between them was common. With rockets and chemicals alone one [text missing] the galaxy in but a handful of weeks.

This, along with other sources such as the GOC's own astronomical research gradually led them to believe that SCP-XXXX was in fact anomalous. The GOC began a series of experiments given the project code named Operation Nyx. After extensive research, it was determined that the speed of light was vastly higher in the early days of the universe. When Researcher BLACKBOX defected to the Foundation she brought declassified documentation on project Nyx making the Foundation aware of the phenomenon.

After the Foundation became aware of SCP-XXXX's existence, the possibility of containing or neutralizing it was discussed. Eventually the matter reached the acting O5 council. After voting it was decided that funding and resources would be granted for research into SCP-XXXX and possible ways to circumvent it so as to allow nonanomalous means of intrauniversal travel to be developed.

Addendum:

Following the beginning of research into the possibility of neutralizing SCP-XXXX, a package was recieved from an anomalous source which contained the following documents.

Document XXXX-A

To whom it may concern.

We are aware what you know and what you are trying to do. While your desire for knowledge and a greater link to other worlds is admirable, you must remember an important fact. This universe is hostile to existence and to life. This 'SCP-XXXX' not only keeps you in your corner of the Hytoth, but also keeps the nightmares in the rest of the universe out.

… said to each other 'let us make a city of bronze.' And so they made for themselves a mighty city on the shore of the [unknown, probably liquid ammonia] sea. And for five generations the city stood on the shore. But then, from the [section missing], great blackholes that came with a cloud of pastry surrounding them appeared and the city was no more. The Koru-teusa shut the gates of the black holes and said to each other 'let us make a great city of silver and to put watchmen at the edges of it to guard against the [unknown]. And so they built a great city in the oasis under the mountains of [unknown] and for six generations the city stood on the shore. But then snakes made of the primordial mud all life had emerged from came from the East and devoured the watchmen and the city. The Koru-teusa struck down the snakes and said "let us make an even greater city of gold and build mighty fortifications to protect it.' And so they built a great city in the clouds of [a gas giant] and surounded it on all sides with mighty fortifications that fought of their own accord and for seven generations the city flew. But behold a great wave of nothingness came from the North and destroyed the city and its fortifications. The Koru-teusa filled up the nothingness and said to each other 'let us make the greatest city of all which will endure for all generations out of iron.' And so they built a great city on the surface of a blue sun and said such spells over it that no dark creature could set foot their. But behold a great sunquake occured and the city sunk beneath the surface never to return. And so the Koru-teusa said to each other 'if this continues nothing in the universe will be left! We must find another way.' And so the Koru-teusa returned to their tent and discussed some things for 9 days and nights before a solution presented itself. And so on the tenth day they emerged from their tent and, facing towards the stars, they spoke such words that the roads between all [lspheres?] would be shut so that such terrors that had destroyed the four cities would not be able to travel beyond their own worlds and harm the rest of life. But the Koru-teusa gave to their faithful the hidden means by which they could still travel to other worlds. And on the eleventh day they rested.

Following a major review of current research into neutralizing SCP-XXXX conducted by the ethics committee, the following resolution was made and SCP-XXXX was updated to it's current containment procedure. An explanation of this decision was also made.

The possibility of achieving FTL methods without the use of rare, dangerous anomalies that we barely understand would be a massive opportunity for cultural and scientific advancement. Unfortunately, the core of this organization has been and always will be protection. Even if we could neutralize SCP-XXXX, which is unlikely anyway, that would simply put us in range of every k-class scenario happening on every planet in the universe. Needless to say this is not something that the Foundation can allow.

Roger Sheldon, O5-11

The Devil Owns This Town

THIS FILE INCLUDES A CONTAINMENT PROCEDURE UNDER INVESTIGATION BY THE ETHICS COMMITTEE.

---

THIS OBJECT'S CLASSIFICATION AND CONTAINMENT PROCEDURES MAY BE CHANGED DEPENDENT ON THE RESULT OF THE INVESTIGATION.

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Archon⁸

Special Containment Procedure: A disinformation campaign attributing SCP-XXXX's anomalous properties to natural causes is to be used. The SCp-XXXX's police department are to obtain funding from the Foundation. No attempt to halt SCP-XXXX's anomalous properties is to be made.

Description: SCP-XXXX is BLACKBOX, a town in the state of Ohio. SCP-XXXX possesses several anomalous effects.

• The incidence of violent crimes in SCP-XXXX is massively (6-8 times) higher than in surrounding towns and cities.
• Individuals who have committed violent crimes have a high chance of moving from surrounding towns and cities to SCP-XXXX.
• Individuals sentenced by SCP-XXXX's legal system have a much higher than normal probability of being given the death penalty.
• Despite the high incidence of violent crime compared to the rest of the region, SCP-XXXX's has high population growth.

Discovery: The anomalous properties of SCP-XXXX first came to the Foundation's attention in 1987. After a three year investigation it was determined conclusively that these effects could not be attributed to any nonanomalous source.

The Accursed

SCP-2501-J

Item #: SCP-2501-J

Object Class: Thaumiel

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-2501-J is to be kept under the control of the GOI Marshall, Carter and Dark ltd. at all times. No Foundation personnel are to accept SCP-2501-J from any individual associated with MC&D ltd. no matter how much Mr. Dark begs or what he offers in exchange for taking it. Any attempt by MC&D ltd. to rid themselves of SCP-2501-J is to be prevented at any cost.

Description: SCP-2501-J is a hideous toy monkey purchased by MC&D ltd. that is directly responsible for the near destruction of their GOI. SCP-2501-J possesses an extremely destructive and horrific curse⁹ that causes vast misfortune for any individual who owns it.

Discovery: SCP-2501-J was discovered by Mr. Dark at the home of Mr. Adam Howitzer, a rich business associate of his. Mr. Howitzer had showed SCP-2501-J off to Mr. Dark at a dinner party and boasted how he had received it from 'an old, ugly crone' who had warned him that SCP-XXXX-J was 'accursed'. Howitzer had scoffed at the old woman's rantings and, to spite her, had purchased SCP-2501-J for $1,000,000 USD to prove that the so called 'curse' was a hoax. Mr. Dark and Mr. Howitzer had a good laugh over this and then turned back to discussing improved methods of marketing the supernatural. After Mr. Dark left, he took SCP-2501-J with him and put it in a MC&D vault for safekeeping. However, soon after SCP-2501-J was obtained the MC&D corporation was struck by several unfortunate events.

Date	Horrific Fate
12/20/2021	Dr. Wondertainment becomes aware that MC&D are also purchasing products from the Factory. Dr. Wondertainment then cancels all contracts with MC&D and unfollows them on all possible social media sites.
12/25/2021	All Prometheus Lab paratechnology owned by MC&D spontaneously malfunctions at the same time. 3,598 employees are killed in the resulting explosions.
01/30/2021	MC&D rents a time machine to go back in time to find Prometheus Lab scientists who can repair the surviving paratech. However the time machine malfunctions resulting in the total loss of the mission, the extinction of the dinosaurs, and the Rise of the Third Reich
01/32/2022	MC&D's Dark Web project is cancelled upon the discovery that every user on it is an implanted Foundation agent, a bot or both.
01/(theta prime)/2022	The Factory becomes aware that MC&D had been also purchasing products from Dr. Wondertainment. The Factory cancels all contracts with MC&D and unfollows them on all possible social media sites.
02/98/2021	Mr. Carter dies of a heart attack
13/13/1313	The anomalous art group Are We Cool Yet? manufactures an art piece called Marshall, Carter and Dark SUCK!!!!, a one foot tall statue depicting Mr. Dark [DATA EXPUNGED]. Marshall, Carter and Dark SUCK!!!! rapidly becomes the most critically acclaimed sculpture of the twenty-first century and is eventually sold for 910 million dollars USD.
03/579/1202	Ms. Marshall is assassinated. Although she successfully evaded the Foundation's trained kill team, the Chaos Insurgency's attempt to poison her, the GOC's ninjas, the GOCs orbital strike10, the GOCs other ninjas and the Serpent Hand's elite sniper monkeys, she was suddenly ambushed by Wilson of Wilson's Wildlife Refugee who stabbed her 253 times in retaliation for the unicorn thing.11
99/99/9999	Mr. Dark's daughter, Iris Dark, runs away with her boyfriend.12
02/12/19/05	Mr. Dark cuts himself while preparing dinner after having fired his private chef. The injury becomes infected resulting in the amputation of his right arm.
00/θ'/0000	Using information gleaned from Ms. Marshall's pocket book which they stole after her death, the Chaos Insurgency steals every anomalous product still owned by &D ltd. Using the newly obtained paratech, the Insurgency declares war on every world government and the Three Moons Initiative. While the Initiative are able to defeat the Insurgency after a brutal campaign, this uses up 99% of their budget forcing them to cancel the afterlife.
shoop/da/whoop	Mr. Dark's yacht is sunk after colliding with a SPC military vessel preforming a combat drill in the Bay of Mexico. This rendered the SPC unable to stop a thaumaturgic ritual being performed by a school of hammerhead sharks resulting in the successful summoning of an immense monster that attacked and destroyed Tokyo.

After these events, Mr. Dark returned to the radioactive crater where Mr. Howitzer's house had been, however Mr. Howitzer was not there. Dark later found Howitzer sleeping under a bridge and wearing a barrel. Since SCP-2501-J had been placed in the &D vault Mr. Howitzer had lost his wife, his children, his house, all seven of his cars, both his legs from the knee down and his balls. Mr. Dark then concluded that SCP-2501-J really was cursed and decided to give it to the Foundation.

Call Log 2501-J

O5-11: Hello, you have reached [REDACTED], with who am I speaking?

Mr. Dark: Hey, it's me, Mr. Dark, CEO of And Dark ltd.

O5-11: How the Hell did you get my number?
Mr. Dark: It doesn't matter 'cause like. I have a deal for you. You see I found this anomaly and…

O5-11: Is it that monkey thing?

Mr. Dark: Well, I mean yeah but hear me out. This one time only I'll sell it to you for only $100 USD.

O5-11: No.

Mr. Dark: Okay, okay, how about instead I give you $100.**

O5-11: Sorry, Mr. Dark but we had a meeting about this. We're not supposed to accept SCP-2501-J from you, that's like literally part of the containment procedures.

Mr. Dark: But locking up anomalies is literally your job!

O5-11: I mean, we don't have to have all the anomalies. This one is safer with you.

Mr. Dark: You guys are the experts on this sort of thing. You should be the ones to do it.

O5-11: No, Mr. Dark. We know the troubles that your company has been facing, you need it more than we do right now.

Mr. Dark: No, no no. You don't understand. I no longer want to sell anomalies as part of an evil capitalist Illuminati, I'm a changed man! I've turned over a new leaf and…

O5-11: We're not taking SCP-2501-J from you.

Mr. Dark: Fuck you. You're going to take this or I'll…

O5-11 terminates the call.

Addendum: Incident 2501-J-Godpig-Apollyon-Doomiel

On 01/01/2015, MTF Alpha-1 'Red Right Hand', who at the time were off duty eating ice cream at a local restaurant, received a distress signal from the Administrator's emergency system. MTF Alpha-1 tracked the signal back to Site-[REDACTED] where they found the administrator being chased by Mr. Dark who was clutching SCP-2501-J and repeatedly screaming 'Take the monkey' as he ran after her. MTF Alpha-1 opened fire with live munitions but Mr. Dark ducked and the bullets instead hit SCP-343 who had just left Site-[REDACTED] to check his mail. SCP-343 was struck in the head, dying instantly, resulting in a ZK-Class 'Reality Failure' scenario across the entire multiverse. The earth itself only survived thanks to the sudden usage of 1 billion Scranton Reality Anchors.

Note:

It has recently come to the Foundation's attention that Scranton Reality Anchors do not actually exist. Because of this it has been concluded by Foundation researchers that the earth actually was destroyed in the total collapse of all reality following SCP-343's untimely demise. The continued existence of this document is a mystery currently being investigated.

Of MEKHANE and Monkeys

"Welcome to the Jungle of Logic"

Mason blinked in the sudden bright light a few times and took a step forward. His ears were assaulted by a vast clicking noise coming from all directions. He looked to his left and saw that Father Deacon was still with him, but they were now in a vastly different location then the humble Mekhanite church they had left through unknown means. The Jungle of Logic was well… a jungle. Clockwork trees rose high into the air all around them,buzzing with a faint ticking noise. Gold leaf-lined the ground in place of grass and thick rubber vines climbed all over the floor and up the trees. Most amazing though were the clockwork monkeys. Father Deacon had told Mason that he'd see them, but still he was amazed. Their were dozens visible just from where he stood in the forest. Each of the primate machines sat at a metal desk seemingly grown from the jungle floor madly hammering at a golden typewriter. The monkeys didn't stupidly hammer away at the keys like a real monkey would. Instead they brought a finger of their mechanical hands down on the keys one at a time then quickly moved to another key. The typewriters printed deep cobalt letters onto the rolls of maroon paper. Mason wondered who refilled them.

"Yes." Father Deacon said, speaking in a reverent tone "This dimension is the very heart of our great work, MEKHANE'S own mind pulling itself back from the void!" Mason looked around the place in wonder. He caught a whiff of the strong scent of oil.

"At the height of MEKHANE'S power" Father Deacon continued "This world contained an infinite amount of clockwork monkeys typing at holy typewriters to form His thoughts. Now, you must realize that with an infinite dimension, and infinite monkeys

The Continuing Adventures of the Streamliner

Night had fallen over the smoke-stained streets of Chicago casting the Windy City into inky darkness illuminated by dim islands of light. Despite the late hour, a yellow taxicab pulled up to the front of the [REDACTED] apartment complex, lit by the neon yellow glow of the nearby street lamps.

"Well here we are, sir." the man driving the taxi said to his mysterious, silent companion. "Later than my customers usually arrive here, but I won't pry." The man in the back of the taxi nodded his head and, reaching into his white coat, pulled out a pile of paper money which he handed to the driver. The man in white opened the door and stepped outside into the cool night air. As he did so the taxi driver could not shake the suspicious feeling that the man seemed familiar. The man in white simply gave him a nod and then walked away towards the light of the apartment complex. The taxi driver started driving away, little suspecting that his companion had been in truth the Streamliner, Chicago's famous (or infamous) pataphysical superhero. The Streamliner reached the door of the apartment complex. As he reached the front door, something made him hesitate. The Streamliner turned around and peered into the near darkness beyond the city streets. Was that movement he caught just barely perceivable in those black depths? Nothing came out to challenge him, so he returned to the apartment complex with a shrug. He did not see the clear, shining eyes in the dark watching his every move…

Taking a step inside, the Streamliner made a sharp turn and immediately headed towards the stair case to the left. Behind the heavy desk at the front of the room sat a young black women with hair tied back in a bun behind her head. As the Streamliner walked by she made a quick 'OK' symbol with her fingers, their secret sign that indicated to himr that nothing immediately requiring his attention had transpired. The Streamliner started walking up the steps and immediately reached the top thanks to his pataphysical superpower compressing the narrative. He reached the roof and similarly instantaneously switched into his bright white superhero outfit.

The night was as dark as it had been when he first arrived at the apartment complex. Still he went out hunting for criminals and other evil doers irregardless of the dangers that must certainly lurk on such a night, just as he did every night. With light footsteps and quiet treads, he walked alone along the roof top while humming his theme song to himself. The night had been relatively quiet, but suddenly the Streamliner's concentration was suddenly broken by the distressed sounds of someone in a nearby alleyway. Thinking that it was a fair citizen who may need his aid, the Streamliner rushed over to the edge of the apartment complex and looked over towards the alley situated in its shadow below. To his surprise though, he did not see any endangered civilians in the alley. Instead he saw a group of thugs and low-lifes (after extensive superhero training he could recognize such individuals at a glance) who had already been killed. The corpses all wore ski masks and had been sliced to pieces, apparently by a sword. The Streamliner frowned behind the glass mask of his motorcycle helmet as he attempted to determine what had happened. It appeared to him that… Suddenly, the Streamliner heard the sound of footsteps behind him, he was instantly reminded of the strange feeling of being watched he had felt as he had arrived at the apartment complex. It seemed that he was not alone on the rooftop after all…

"Ah yes…" The Streamliner heard a voice call out behind him. "At long last we meet, Streamliner." It was a voice the Streamliner recognized from his time when he was imprisoned by the Foundation. The voice of a living legend. Darkblade. The swordsman stood at the opposite edge of the rooftop. The Streamliner hadn't noticed his arrival. The wind blew Darkblade's white hair and his hand rested on the hilt of the fabled weapon that he took his namesake from. But he didn't draw it. Not yet at least.

"It was difficult to track you down Streamliner." Darkblade said as he sized up the metafictional superhero. "You hid yourself well after you escaped from the Foundation's prison but," Darkblade smiled "I knew that you couldn't keep it up forever."

The Streamliner did not turn around. He continued looking across the Chicago skyline where no stars were visible. He could see the crescent moon rising in the far distance, little more then a white smear against the black.

"The Foundation asked me to recapture you, being that I am always keen for another chance to test my skills with my chosen weapon I accepted." Now, finally, Darkblade drew his dreaded sword from it's sheathe and held it in his hands. Moonlight reflected of the blade's black sheen and wisps of water started to form around the swordsman as he prepared his defenses. The Streamliner still clenched and unclenched his fists. Under his motorcycle helmet he was starting to sweat.

"Now" Darkblade said "I give you the opportunity to surrender before I am forced to fight you and take you back to the Foundation by force." The Streamliner said nothing.

"So be it then, friend" Darkblade entered a sword fighting stance. "I've heard that you are this world's strongest anomaly, try not to disappoint me." Finally the Streamliner turned to face Darkblade and entered a combat stance as the battle began. Darkblade yelled a warcry and ran forward, slashing with his mighty blade while summoning a shell of water to repel the Streamliner's attacks. Thinking fast, the Streamliner defeated Darkblade.

Darkblade collapsed to his knees, the broken pieces of his katana lying in front of him. He gasped for breathe, blood leaking from his mouth and placed a hand on the ground to steady himself.

"It's true!" he said, shock and amazement apparent in his voice. "You really are the strongest."

Without a word the Streamliner turned around and started walking away from his conquered foe. But, during the battle, he had forgotten that he was standing on the edge of an apartment complex. He accidentally stepped off the edge and fell ten stories down to the streets below, dying on impact.

Note: After this event, SCP-4455 was reclassified to neutralized. Darkblade was promoted to the O5-council for his role in the successful neutralization and is now known simply as Dark¹³.

Land Where Dragons Rule

Eli coughed to clear his throat as he walked towards the center of the cave. Across from him five massive dragons stood hunched down with their horns scraping against the cave's roof. Their eyes glowed faintly providing the only light in the darkness of the cave, they all wore black three-piece suits complete with ties as long as Eli was tall hanging down from their long snakelike necks. The dragons stood almost completely still, almost like statues until he reached the center of the room. When he did, the orange monster who stood in the middle of the group of dragons and appeared to be their leader nodded at Eli and then took a single immense step forward herself before addressing him.

"Glad to see you've arrived O5-4" the dragon said "I trust that your 'Foundation' has decided to agree to our terms after all and no conflict between us will be necessary?"

"Unfortunately not ma'am" Eli said shaking his head "Your terms are, to put it quaintly, unfeasible." the orange dragon snorted shooting a few sparks out of its nostrils. "However" Eli continued "We have written out some alternate terms which hopefully will be acceptable. In exchange for the cessation of all hostilities and your agreement to assist the Foundation we will…"

"No, you don't understand O5-4" the Dragon said shaking its spiked head flinging a few sparks down to the cave's warm stone floor "Me and the rest of my organization have been working on this far to long to stop right now and ceasing fighting would prevent us from accomplishing our goals. In fact, we've been doing this little project of ours since before your species first invented fire." The dragon motioned with one massive claw to the side of the cave where a pile of machinery was sitting obscured by the near darkness. Screens flicked on all across it and Eli realized that it was a group of television displays. They showed scenes from all around the world, most of which were full of fire and smoke. He saw dragons torching tanks with their breath or dueling fighter jets in the sky, cities burning as monsters swooped overhead in smoke covered skies, dark shapes moving through massive fields of blackened human bones, immense sea serpents twisting and writhing near the coast. Eli started to sweat a little more, albeit mostly from the massive body heat of the creatures in front of him. As an O5 member he had seen far, far worse. But still…

"Do you think that you can intimidate me Ms. Paquette?" He asked her. A stray spark landed on his hand and he felt a quick shot of pain.

"Oh no" the dragon snorted with a rough approximation of a laugh "I just wished to point out some things I've noticed. It appears that you are in a rather precarious position here."

"Yes, but appearances are often deceiving." Eli made sure to stare the dragon right in her eye when he spoke. "There is nothing you or the rest of your dragons and serpents could do that we haven't encountered, understood and neutralized before." The dragon gave a smile full of crocodile teeth at that.

"Actually, I do believe that you are wrong here. We are most assuredly not like anything you've seen before. We are not simply some cosmic aberration or an abstract blob of broken physics. We are something new, a species that's as far above your kind as you are above cattle."

"I don't think you know what you're talking about Ms. Paquette." Eli said shaking his head "We haven't even brought out half of what we could unleash against you and your forces. We have things that could turn this planet inside out if it became necessary. If you continue down this path then you'll be simply traveling to your own grave" For the first time the dragon's haughty demeanor seemed to drop somewhat. She turned towards a spike-covered green beast to the left of her, but he just shrugged his immense shoulders and looked away.

"I suppose you could O5-4…" the dragon said seeming to be carefully deciding her words "Assuming what you're saying is even true, but would you? Would you and the rest of your origination really throw away everything that you've been fighting for just to spite us?"

"Er… well."

"And besides O5-4, it's not like your 'Foundation' is the only game in town. Their are other occult organizations and most of them have already pledged us their support." Eli felt cold despite the sweltering heat of the cave, that was news to him.

"What?"

"We have already contacted almost a dozen of these 'GOI's as you call them and have obtained promises of their support. Most notably the Global Occult Coalition who…"

"Bullshit." Eli said interrupting her "The GOC would never willingly ally with" he almost said 'monsters' but corrected himself "a hostile species that's at war with practically all of humanity." The dragon laughed again.

"It seems you once again misunderstand us. You believe that this is a war between humans and dragons. But nothing could be farther from the truth. The dragon stepped to the side and breathed a breath of flame into the cave behind her. For a split second the light flared up and Eli could see what was in the deeper parts of the cave. Gold. Hills of gold coins and bars stretching from the roof to the floor and glittering like stars under the brief light.

"Who controls the GOC?" The dragon asked as a monstrous grin spread on her face. "The UN. What controls the UN? Money! And who could possibly have more of that than a dragon?"

"Marshall, Carter and Dark maybe?"

"They were the first to give us their support actually!" The dragon said sounding suddenly very excited "After them we got Dr. Wondertainment then Anderson's Robotics and finally the GOC along with many other minor occult groups. It was surprisingly easy, enough money can accomplish what even the gods cannot. Just a few bribes in the right place at the right time, carefully used over the course of a few decades and we were able to ensure that the leaders of most of the GOIs your organization has been dealing with were all individuals who are sympathetic to our cause. Do you think that we could have gotten as far as we have without the support?" She gestured towards the television screens again. Eli pointedly ignored them.

"You're lying." Damn. Eli thought to himself. He needed to make some calls to check on the GOIs once he got out of the cave. He knew how to contact the GOC, but what about the rest of them? It wasn't as if they had easily available phone numbers and they would almost certainly be blocking the Foundation's calls even if they did.

"MC&D I could kind of believe you on." Eli said speaking slowly Maybe Anderson's as well. But the rest of them? Bullshit. The GOC would never agree to this no matter who you payed off."

"If that's the case than why haven't they sent any forces against us yet?"

"They probably have or are starting one now, Hell even us at the Foundation are just getting onto our full war footing. Once we do your entire species will be terminated with extreme prejudice. Unless you're willing to listen to our terms." The dragon gave a smirk, one of the other ones laughed.

"Well, we tried." The dragon sighed releasing a massive gust of hot air into the room. "I suppose that I should give you one last chance to accept our terms."

"I can't accept anything without the rest of the O5 council's permission and you certainly won't be able to convince them of anything. So I suppose that's it then."

"I guess so, hopefully we next time we meet it will be under better circumstances."

"I find that unlikely, but thank you anyway." Eli turned and began walking towards the exit of the cave. From the darkness, glowing red eyes traced his steps until he emerged from the other side into dim sunlight.

Dr. Wondertainment Gets Arrested on Child Endangerment Charges.

Officer Daniels flipped through the pages on the clipboard he held in his hands before sitting down at the table. He shifted a few times to get into a comfortable position then placed the clipboard on the desk before looking up. At the other side of the table in the interrogation room sat a bored looking woman who was handcuffed and gave him a blank look as he sat down.

Applelife.

It was the Lizard. Of course it was the Lizard.

Dr King had just been stepping outside of his office, having finished everything he needed to get done that day, when he half heard, half felt a vibration from somewhere in the building. Dr. King stopped standing completely still and listening closely. Given his job at the Foundation he could never tell if a bang was someone refilling the vending machine or the end of the world. Whatever it was it didn't repeat, so Dr. King locked the door to his office and started walking down the hallway, intending to stop by the men's restroom before he went home for the evening. There were windows all along the right side of the hallway that opened to a gold setting sun over miles upon miles of forests. After he left it would be almost an hour drive before… there was a crash louder than a thunderclap and the entire building shook to it's foundation. Dr. King was knocked to the ground and landed on his hip. Burning pain shot up his leg and side and he cried out. For several seconds he could only sit up and clutch his side nearly doubling over in pain as he did so. Another boom came out and the building shook again sending plaster raining down from above and causing the emergency lights to flick on. Over the loudspeakers an automatic voice boomed out 'a major containment breach is in progress'. Despite the pain, Dr. King forced himself to stand up and start running down the hall. He reached the door at the end of it but his hands were shaking so hard it took him several tries to turn the door handle and rush inside. Another shake ran through the building and then he began to hear the screaming. Not all of it sounded human. "Of course this is today…" Dr. King muttered. The door led him to the main stairway, he started running downwards making good progress even as the screaming and shaking grew louder. Despite his age, Dr. King had been practicing running as often as possible just in case a situation like that happened. He reached the third floor of the building and another voice came over the speakers 'SCP-682 has breached containment, evacuate immediately' Dr. King kept running. He reached the bottom of the stairs and nearly ran into the door at the bottom. He tore it open and ran through, he knew the way out. Dr. King ran down another hallway as bits of plaster rained like snow around him, and then reached one of the emergency exits before tossing it open and rushing outside. He emerged into a field nest to the building and raised his arm to shield his eyes from the sudden bright sunlight. Dr. King stopped where he was, panting for breath and surprised to have gotten out so easily. At that moment though, inside the building, an immortal hell lizard collapsed a few supports causing the wall behind him to lean out and then fall apart in a miniature landslide. Dr. King was crushed under almost two tons of debris, mercifully dying almost instantly.

---

Dr. King saw everything go dark as a shadow covered the sun and then he felt something hit him from behind. Then everything went black, not just dark. Pure, absolute black like nothing he had ever seen before, like what he imagined that someone who had been born blind would see. Am I dead? Dr. King wondered. He felt a sickening feeling as it dawned on him that actually would explain what was going on. Dr. King noticed three things, he noticed that color seemed to be returning and the void around him seemed slightly brighter, second that he could feel the sensation of falling through space, and third that he couldn't feel anything else at all. His hip no longer hurt and the back pain he had been suffering for a few decades had disappeared. If it had been under better circumstances he would have been very happy about that. Dr. King looked down and saw that he was flying or floating through a void over… something. At first he couldn't tell what it was, at first it seemed like an infinite plane of brown extending forever in every direction. But then, as it neared closer and closer, Dr. King noticed what it was. It was awful, cruel and unfair. What he saw rapidly approaching him, rising through infinities of nothingness, made the worst tales he'd heard of fire and brimstone or rotting forever in your own corpse seem like pleasant dreams by comparison. Dr. King's mouth gaped open and all he could say was 'Are you shitting me?" as he crashed into it. It was apple seeds. Dr. King landed and crashed face first landing in the, middle of an infinite, nearly level plane of apple seeds which surrounded him on all sides. He jumped to his feat spitting some of them out of his mouth and looked around in a near panic. "Is this some sort of joke?" It was the only thing he could think to say.

"Well…" Dr King spun around sending a few apple seeds flying away into the darkness. Behind him an entity was floating towards him. It had a human-like outline, but it seemed to be composed of black darkness except for three eyes in the middle of its otherwise blank face that glowed with silver light. A thin white mist clung to the ground around it.

"Are you God?" Dr. King asked, the creature didn't look like what he had imagined God would look like but after decades in the Foundation nothing could surprise him anymore.

"Sort of…" the entity said "I'm a lower case g god."

"What is this place?" Dr. King asked, he was glad that he at the very least wasn't alone there.

"This is the afterlife… well… I guess you could call it the applelife in your case." Dr. King was so confused, disgusted and shocked that he couldn't even form a response to that. "Why?" he finally asked after what felt like a long time.

"Sorry, it's just that… you see… the way the Foundation has it set up… you see… they consider death and the afterlife to be anomalies now so…"

"So now that I'm dead my afterlife is… apple seeds?"

"Precisely! Though I should mention that…"

"So I'm going to be stuck in a boundless desert of apple seeds for all eternity."

"No no no…" the entity "Just until the Foundation no longer considers death and the afterlife to be anomalies."

"What?"

"Okay… okay look." the entity raised it's hands in the air in a defensive gesture "I know this may not be the afterlife you may have wanted but…" Dr. King picked up a handful of apple seeds and tossed them at the entity. The seeds passed straight through it.

"What the Hell is wrong with you? You think that… you can't just…"

"Okay, okay, okay. Look, I know you're upset right now, I imagine that this is a lot to take in at the moment, especially with your recent death, but bear with me here. You should know that compared to some of the other possible fates that could await you post-death an infinite apple seed desert really isn't that bad!" Dr. King shot the Entity a frigid look, then he sighed feeling resigned. He collapsed to the ground, kicking up a cloud of apple seeds, feeling unable to do anything else.

"Is this because of 110-Montauk?" he asked.

"Nonononono" the entity said hastily. "Ah… sorry friend. It seems you're a bit confused here. You're not being punished or anything like that, apologies for the confusion there. It's just that's the way it works… well, for you at least."

"Why, you still haven't explained that? Is this actually some sort of joke?"

"Do you want the honest answer or the one you'd like to hear?"

"Be honest."

"Basically yes. It's pretty much just a cosmic practical joke at your expense. To be fair we didn't know the afterlife and death would be declared anomalies when we started this."

SCP-2783 Tale

Dental Fantasy

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: Foundation webcrawlers are to search for evidence of SCP-XXXX effected individuals. Any effected individual is to have all their teeth removed. Teeth that have become SCP-XXXX-A instances are to be quarantined in Site-190's biological hazard wing and stored away from other SCP-XXXX-A instances. SCP-XXXX-A instances are to be supplied with small amounts of water and raw beef.

Description: SCP-XXXX refers to a species of near microscopic¹⁴ humanoid entities. SCP-XXXX instances visually appear identical to humans except that every part of their body, including their eyes hair and skin are pure monochrome white.

SCP-XXXX's primary habitat is the human mouth, instances are capable of using tools they form out of enamel to make tunnels, rooms and other structures inside of human teeth and use these structures as habitation. SCP-XXXXs will harvest saliva for water, and biological matter from their host's tongue or cheeks for food. This is invariably causes irritation to the host, but is rarely directly dangerous due to the SCP-XXXX's instances small size.

SCP-XXXX instances are extremely aggressive and after colonizing a human mouth will break up into distinct factions. SCP-XXXX faction will frequently launch raids on other factions for the purpose of taking captives who will

LordStoneFish proposal

A queer harbor seal that learns to dance with humans.

dado monster pill

Note to self

For the three sandboxes I'm using:

1. Is for me to dump any idea I have into.

2. Is to contain things I want to write eventually

3. Is for pages in 'active development.

4. TOO MANY IDEAS.

5. Must. Actually. Finish. Something.

So these rocks will turn to sand

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: Foundation webcrawlers are to continuously monitor social media sites for reports of SCP-XXXX events and to delete such reports from the internet. Individuals who are known to continuously experience SCP-XXXX are to be amnestized.

Description: SCP-XXXX refers to an anomalous dream. SCP-XXXX is rare but can be experienced by any member of the population. in 91% of cases, an individual experiences only a single SCP-XXXX event in their lifetime. However, in the rest of the cases the individual will continue to experience SCP-XXXX events. SCP-XXXX events are noted to be much more vivid and detailed then nonanamolous dreams, almost to the point of being indistinguishable from reality.

Darkblade versus the Streamliner

Night had fallen over the smoke-stained streets of Chicago casting the Windy City into inky darkness illuminated by dim islands of light. Still,the Streamliner was out hunting for criminals and other evil doers irregardless of the dangers that must certainly lurk on such a night. With light footsteps and quiet treads, he walked alone along the top of an apartment complex while humming his theme song to himself. It had been a slow night so far, but then the Streamliner's concentration was suddenly broken by the distressed sounds of someone in a nearby alleyway. Thinking that it was a fair citizen who may need his aid, the Streamliner rushed over to the edge of the apartment complex and looked over towards the alley situated in its shadow. To his surprise though, he did not see any endangered civilians in the alley. Instead he saw a group of thugs and low-lifes who had already been killed. The corpses all wore ski masks and had been sliced to pieces, apparently by a sword. The Streamliner frowned behind the glass mas of his motorcycle helmet as he attempted to determine what had happened. It appeared to him that… Suddenly, the Streamliner heard the sound of footsteps behind him. It seemed that he was not alone on the rooftop after all.

"Ah yes." he heard a voice call out behind him. "At long last we meet, Streamliner." It was a voice the Streamliner recognized from his time imprisoned by the Foundation. The voice of a living legend. Darkblade. The swordsman stood at the opposite edge of the rooftop, the Streamliner hadn't noticed his arrival. The wind blew Darkblade's white hair and his hand rested on the hilt of the fabled weapon that he took his namesake from. But he didn't draw it. Not yet.

"It was difficult to track you down Streamliner." Darkblade said as he sized up the white-clad superhero. "You hid yourself well after you escaped from the Foundation's prison but," Darkblade smiled "I knew that you couldn't keep it up forever."

The Streamliner did not turn around. He continued looking across the Chicago skyline. He could see the crescent moon rising in the far distance.

"The Foundation asked me to recapture you, being that I am always keen for another chance to test my skills with my chosen weapon I accepted." Now, finally, Darkblade drew his dreaded sword from it's sheathe and held it in his hands. Moonlight reflected of the blade's black sheen and wisps of water started to form around the swordsman as he prepared his defenses. The Streamliner still clenched and unclenched his fists. Under his motorcycle helmet he was starting to sweat.

"Now" Darkblade said "I give you the opportunity to surrender before I am forced to fight you and take you back to the Foundation by force." The Streamliner said nothing.

"So be it then, friend" Darkblade entered a sword fighting stance. "I've heard that you are this world's strongest anomaly, try not to disappoint me." Finally the Streamliner turned to face Darkblade as the battle began. Darkblade yelled a warcry and ran forward, slashing with his mighty blade while summoning a shell of water to repel the Streamliner's attacks. Thinking fast, the Streamliner defeated Darkblade.

Darkblade collapsed to his knees, the broken pieces of his katana lying in front of him. He gasped for breathe, blood leaking from his mouth.

"It's true!" he said, shock apparent in his voice. "You really are the strongest."

Without a word the Streamliner turned around and started walking away from his conquered foe. But, during the battle, he had forgotten that he was standing on the edge of an apartment complex. He accidentally stepped off the edge and fell ten stories down, dying on impact.

Note: After this event, SCP-4455 was reclassified to neutralized. Darkblade was promoted to the O5-council for his role in the successful neutralization and is now known simply as Dark¹⁵.

Ghost Dog

—Item #: SCP-4313

Object Class: Euclid, pending Neutralized

Special Containment Procedures: Due to SCP-4313's nature, full containment of it is not possible. MTF Mu-13 are to monitor the suburban areas around Baltimore and administer Class-B amnestics to individuals who see the anomaly SCP-4313 is believed, but not confirmed, to be neutralized.

Description: SCP-4313 is an incorporeal entity manifesting in the town of ███████, Maryland. SCP-4313 visually appears as a dog of the Old English Sheepdog breed, however SCP-4313 is undetectable by any electronic equipment and can only be visually perceived by one human at a time. It is unclear how (or if) SCP-4313 chooses individuals to manifest to. When an individual becomes aware of SCP-4313, it will attempt to lead them to another location. If the individual follows the entity, SCP-4313 will lead them to the location of human or animal remains before demanifesting.

As of 11/12/2015 no new reports of encounters with the entity have occurred. See Incident Report 129-M

Discovery: SCP-XXXX was first noticed by the Foundation in April 2015 when urban legends about the entity began to circulate over social media sites and were detected by Foundation webcrawlers. After several collaborating accounts were reported, MTF Mu-13 'Ghost Busters' were sent to investigate the anomaly. SCP-4313's existence was confirmed when Agent ██████ Graves encountered the entity on April 15th. Since no physical evidence of the anomaly existed, it was determined that it would be a waste of resources to administer amnestics to everyone who had seen the anomaly. Instead, the current containment procedure, focusing on preventing new information about SCP-XXXX from spreading, was formed.

Addendum:

The following table provides a list of known encounters between Foundation personnel and the anomaly.

Date	Encounter
05/13/2015	First confirmed encounter of the anomaly. Agent Graves noticed SCP-XXXX standing by the roadside while investigating the urban legend that had been spread concerning the entity. Upon realizing that no drivers or pedestrians seemed aware of SCP-XXXX, he went over to it. SCP-XXXX turned around and walked several meters into a wooded area before demanifesting. Agent BLACKBOX found the remains of a squirrel under a bush near to the area where the anomaly demanifested.
06/28/2015	Agent Hall noticed the entity while investigating an unrelated anomaly at the gates to the █████ Graveyard. Agent Hall attempted to approach the entity, only for it to disappear as soon as he neared it.16
07/31/2015	Researcher Maxwell encountered SCP-XXXX behind the ███████ Library while investigating the anomaly. The entity led him nearly a mile away from the library into a heavily wooded area before demanifesting at the site of a deer carcass.
09/05/2015	Agent Graves encountered the anomaly for a second time on top of a bridge passing over the ██████ river. The entity allowed Graves to approach it before turning around and leading him into the woods. After several minutes of walking through dense underbrush, the entity disappeared next to a mound of recently turned earth. Agent Graves notified local authorities who discovered human remains buried in the location.17
10/1/2015	Researcher Maxwell engineered an experiment in which he attempted to cause SCP-XXXX to manifest. He obtained a pig carcass and tried to move it into the woods. However, on his way there he saw SCP-XXXX standing next to the sidewalk for several seconds before it abruptly demanifested.
11/13/2015	Redacted due to size of data. See Incident Report 129-M

+ Incident Report 129-M

Incident 129-M

Agent Graves was awoken from sleep at 3:00 AM on the morning of 11/12/2015. He heard a noise from his front door and, upon investigating, saw SCP-4313 standing on his front porch. However, the entity demanifested after he opened the door.¹⁸ the following morning Agent Graves asked for permission to return to the Baltimore to continue investigation. Permission was granted and Agent Graves returned on November 16th with Agent Rose assisting him. Upon arriving, SCP-4313 did not manifest, however Agent Graves found a trail of canine paw prints in the mud near the ███████ cemetery. Agent Rose was unable to see the trail of prints. Despite this, Agent Graves followed the trail which led to an empty field of grass located in a clearing in the Baltimore Woods.

After investigating for nearly thirty minutes, nothing was noted. However, Agent Rose suggested bringing in cadaver dogs to search the location. The following morning a dog was brought in from a police unit and detected human remains. The dog was noted by its handlers to be unusually agitated when investigating the area. Local police were alerted due to the possibility of another murder victim being found there. The police began excavation and found skeletal human remains after only two minutes of searching. Police continued digging and soon found another skeleton. More officers were called in. The police continued digging and found seven more skeletons before retiring for the evening. The following morning all individuals involved in the dig reported experiencing severe nightmares. Suspecting that the site was a previously unknown anomaly, MTF Mu-13 took action and administered all non-Foundation personnel involved in the dig low grade amnestic doses and dismissed them before continuing the excavation themselves. Mu-13 closed the area off and dug for thirteen days. During this time, the skeletal remains of 2196 humans and one canine were found in the clearing or in the woods directly around it. Most of the skeletons were complete and had no obvious evidence of injuries. Investigation into this phenomenon is ongoing.

Notes: The canine bones were examined and confirmed to have been from an Old English Sheepdog. After this incident, no further reports of SCP-4313 have been known to occur.

—

Avenger of the Gods

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be kept in his sarcophagus which is in turn to be stored in a standard anomaly locker. Three Scranton Reality anchors are to be built into the locker and supplied with emergency power supplies. SCP-XXXX is to be monitored by CCTV cameras at all times. Any attempt by SCP-XXXX to escape his sarcophagus is to be notified to site security. SCP-XXXX's existence is well known to the general population, but this is not a cause for concern as his anomalous properties are not known and he is generally believed to have been a nonanomalous individual.

Description: SCP-XXXX is Unas, the final Pharaoh of Old Egypt's Fifth Dynasty. On the wall of the antechamber in SCP-XXXX's pyramid, there is written a spell in the Old Egyptian style in which SCP-XXXX claims to have slaughtered and eaten the gods of Egypt in order to gain their wisdom and power¹⁹. For most of the time Egyptology has been practiced, it had been assumed that this text was one of the many protective spells written on Old Egyptian tombs. However, in 1987 it was determined by GOC researchers that SCP-XXXX actually had murdered and consumed the race of energy beings (henceforth referred to as SCP-XXXX-RE) that had been worshiped in the Middle East and, in doing so, became a Type-Grey²⁰ entity with potent reality bending abilities.

The Destroyers

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Apollyon

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX cannot be contained by any known method. While several highly theoretical methods of neutralizing SCP-XXXX exist the neutralization of SCP-XXXX would result in the end of human civilization and thus cannot be performed even if the methods proved effective [link tesla thing here]. SCP-XXXX is known to 100% of humanity, but as no individuals outside the Foundation and peer GOIs know of SCP-XXXX's anomalous properties this is not a cause for concern. Despite the impossibility of containing SCP-XXXX, preserving humanity from it is possible via successful implementation of Procedure 169-Noah. While the process to implement this procedure is not yet complete Foundation researchers have made large amounts of progress and hope to be able to implement 169-Noah by 2098.

Description: Due to the nature of this anomaly no conclusions about it have been made. All descriptions of SCP-XXXX and related phenomenon are simply what is likly to be true based on what is currently understood of the phenomenon. The possibility that some of the following data is erroneous cannot be ruled out.

SCP-XXXX is the universe. In addition to all the properties the universe is known to possess it has been shown by extensive research to (likely) possess the following anomalous properties.

* SCP-XXXX is sentient and sapient.

* SCP-XXXX is aware of and actively hostile to humanity.

* SCP-XXXX is currently attempting to cause a K-class 'End-of-the-world' scenario on earth in order to destroy humanity.

* SCP-XXXX's primary means of accomplishing this is via creating brief reality-shifts that can either create new anomalies which are hostile to humans or alter preexisting anomalies to make them hostile.

* SCP-XXXX formerly had the ability to either create or summon instances of SCP-3930-1 ('Pattern Screamers') to assist it in its attempts to destroy humanity, but this capability was lost.

Despite its immense capabilities, SCP-XXXX is hampered in its attempts to destroy humanity because of several reasons.

* SCP-XXXX appears to have difficulty effecting reality on scales as small as planets, thus leading to its necessity for creating indirect methods of destroying humanity.

* SCP-XXXX fears accidentally triggering a ZK-class 'End-of-reality' event while destroying humanity..

* SCP-XXXX is opposed by other entities of similar capabilities.

Discovery: SCP-XXXX's existence was theorized as early as 1961, but it wasn't officially recognized until 1988. Several Foundation scientists noticed the phenomenon in which many of the anomalies encountered by the Foundation are hostile to humans to the point that several anomalies appear to exist for no other reason than to destroy human lives. This led to a theory that their was an anomaly or group that opposed humanity and was the source of these antihuman anomalies. The SCP-XXXX designation was created as a placeholder for this anomaly in case such a thing was ever discovered.

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: N/A²¹

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is not contained nor can it be. The concept of 'containment' does not apply to SCP-XXXX and no possible proposal to contain it is to be accepted. While SCP-XXXX is likely among the greatest threats to civilization and normalcy, no actions are needed beyond those already practiced by the Foundation.

Description: SCP-XXXX is the designation for the Destroyers that SCP-1050 warns against. SCP-XXXX's article was created in DATE as a placeholder in case more information on the Destroyers became available. Since then more information on SCP-XXXX has been discovered and their nature is now well understood by the Foundation, see attached documentation.
anomalous. SCP-XXXX is highly dangerous (it is directally or indirectally responsible for every known mass extinction event in earth's history) but no precautions against it are needed or possible.

Discovery: In

Fear of the Dark

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: The entrance to the cave containing SCP-XXXX is to be blockaded and monitored by the Mobile Task Force Zeta-1 "Mole rats". A base camp referred to as Site-XXXX is to be set up 30 meters in front of SCP-XXXX so as to monitor the anomaly directly.

Description: SCP-XXXX is an electromagnetic phenomenon in the █████████ cave located in central Spain which occupies most of the cave's volume. SCP-XXXX appears visually to be a region of complete darkness starting about 0.2 kilometers down the shaft leading to the cave's entrance and covering the rest of the cave system. Tests conducted on SCP-XXXX have determined that it is completely impassible to all forms of electromagnetic radiation. Tests conducted on SCP-XXXX have concluded with 99% certainty that all electromagnetic waves that encounter the anomaly are destroyed entirely, violating energy conservation.

Discovery: SCP-XXXX was discovered in 1988 when a spelunker encountered the anomaly in the deepest known level of the cave. While his claims about the anomaly were at first dismissed as a hoax by local residents of the town of ███████, the Foundation began an investigation after two other individuals reported the same phenomenon and a story about it appeared in a local newspaper. After confirming the presence of the anomaly, the spelunkers who had seen it were administered class-B amnestics and a disinformation campaign was begun claiming that the public that the article was a hoax. Afterwards a report of a death in a cave-in occurring in the cave was forged by the Foundation as a pretext to close the cave to the public.

During the next three weeks, SCP-XXXX expanded, eclipsing most of the interior volume of the cave. When SCP-XXXX reached the tunnel leading to the cave's entrance, MTF Zeta-1 were dispatched in anticipation of a possible containment breach. However, for unknown reasons, SCP-XXXX stopped expanding when it had reached a point approximately 0.2 kilometers away from the cave entrance. After this occurred, Senior Researcher [Redacted] ordered the creation of Site-XXXX in the cave for monitoring purposes. Since it's first appearance, SCP-XXXX has never never been known to expand.

Addendum: Exploration of SCP-XXXX has been performed by both drones and Foundation personnel. The exploration logs are available below.

+ Exploration Log XXXX-1

Foreward: Exploration was conducted via a drone equipped with a sonar sensor.²²

At 9:45 AM on August 12th, 2005, the drone was sent into SCP-XXXX. The drone's sonar was activated and, as expected, functioned normally inside the anomaly. Software was used to convert the sonar recordings into a map of the explored regions of the cave. No anomalies were detected in the first chamber. The drone was moved forward and the cave quickly sloped downwards before splitting into three more chambers. The chambers were investigated with the drone, but nothing of interest was detected. By this time, the cable that the drone was connected to had reached its maximum length, so the drone was recalled to Site-XXXX. No anomalies were reported during this incident.

+ Exploration Log XXXX-2

Foreward: Exploration conducted via D-13385. D-13385 was given a specially designed device²³ to communicate with Researcher Grant and a cane to help him navigate the dark environment. A 1000-m long, high-strength cable was tied to a harness around his waist, and he was told to enter SCP-XXXX and carefully walk 300 meters forward. The following interview continues from there.

D-13385: I'm here.

Researcher Grant: Thank you, now please sit down.

D-13385: Okay… It's cold here.

Researcher Grant: That can't be helped unfortunately. What do you see?

D-13385: Nothing.

Researcher Grant: I had expected as much. How about your other senses? Can you hear anything down there?

D-13385: Actually, I think I do hear something.

Researcher Grant: What's it sound like?

D-13385: I can't really tell. Can you hear it over this thing?

Researcher Grant: No, try to move a little further down the cave.

The sound of D-13385 walking can be heard for several seconds before an unidentified noise becomes faintly audible

Researcher Grant: I think I hear it now.

D-13385: Do you know what it is?
Researcher Grant: Not really. If I had to guess I'd say it sounds like… like something moving in there. Like an animal of some sort?

D-13385 is silent for two minutes

Researcher Grant: How are you feeling.

D-13385: Uh… good I think. It sounds like whatever is making the noise is getting closer.

Researcher Grant: We've already mapped out the cave system and haven't found anything unusual, so whatever it is, it's most likely harmless.

D-13385: Doctor, can I leave now?
Researcher Grant: Why?

D-13385: I… I need to get out of here. There's something else down here.

Researcher Grant: If you must leave you have my permission, but please stay put. I can send another D-class to…

The sound of D-13385 running can be heard over the radio. Soon afterwards he begins panting for breathe and cursing. There is the sound of a crash and the noise of D-1338 screaming and crying can be heard. This continues for almost thirty seconds before Researcher Grant suddenly runs into SCP-XXXX. One of the MTF Field agents, ██████ Vernet, grabs a gun and runs after him. Contact is lost with both individuals and after five minutes discussion is begun of starting a recovery operation to rescue them.

However, two minutes later both individuals emerge from SCP-XXXX with Agent Varnet carrying D-1338. D-13385 had a closed fracture in his ankle and abrasions over his face and hands but was otherwise uninjured. He was released into the custody of site-XXXX's medical staff. Researcher Grant was interviewed and explained that he found a lip of rock next to where D-1338 had been lying on the ground. When D-13385 had tried to flee the cave he had accidentally tripped over the lip and fallen, breaking his ankle. It's unclear whether the fear that sent D-1338 running was a result of an unknown anomaly of SCP-XXXX or simply a panic attack.

+ Exploration Log XXXX-3

Foreward: After the events of the previous exploration log Researcher Grant volunteered to enter SCP-XXXX himself. A long cable was attached to a harness around his waist and he entered SCP-XXXX with a digital recorder and a cane

Researcher Grant entered SCP-XXXX at 2:43 PM on 11/10/2015. Shortly after entering the anomaly he activated his digital recorder. Following is a text transcript of the recording.

Researcher Grant: I am now inside the anomaly. I'm walking forward.

The sound of footsteps on stone is heard

Researcher Grant: The cave is sloping downwards, it's colder here then in the rest of the cave. No anomalies other then the darkness though.

Researcher Grant: I think I hear that noise again. I'm not sure what it is though. It almost sounds like…

Researcher Grant: Sorry about the play by play. It's a necessary evil, since it's impossible to get an actual video of anything happening in here. I should be reaching the part where the cave splits into three soon.
Researcher Grant is silent for several minutes.

Researcher Grant: …Okay, I haven't reached that part yet. Unless I accidentally walked down the central chamber without knowing it. I am making slow progress since I have to go through here blind though. Maybe I'm just overestimating the difference?

Researcher Grant stops walking and stands still for a few seconds. An unidentified noise can be heard.

Researcher Grant: I'm still not completely sure what that is, but now that I'm closer it's starting to sound like something moving around in here.

Researcher Grant: … It stopped now it… it stopped after I mentioned that.
Researcher Grant: I don't think I'm alone in here.

Researcher Grant: This place is weird I… Wait… I think I've reached the split in the cave.

Researcher Grant: Yeah, there are three openings. They… something's wrong though. The first two… the first two are quiet but I thought I heard something from the third one, it only lasted for a second or so. Something like footsteps.

Researcher Grant: Is someone there?
Researcher Grant is silent for several minutes.
For several seconds the only audible sound is Researcher Grant breathing heavily

Researcher Grant: If you're there say something.

Nothing can be heard

Researcher Grant: I'm turning back. Don't try to…. don't follow me out of this place.

After returning to site-XXXX Researcher Grant noted that he had, briefly, believed that someone else was in SCP-XXXX with him. He designated this theoretical being SCP-XXXX-1. See Interview Log XXXX

+ Exploration Log XXXX-4

Forward:Exploration was conducted by a five member team from MTF Zeta-1 led by Field Agent █████ McGrath. The five members of the team stood in a line with Field Agent █████ McGrath at the front of the group. In addition, a drone with sonar sensors was sent into the cave with them, the sonar from the drone was sent back to site-XXXX via cable and Agent █████ Cohen watched the image generated from the sonar. Each team member wore a harness connecting to a cable leading back to base camp²⁴ All team members were equipped with standard exploration gear along with canes and bobby clubs.

Agent McGrath: Is the recording on?

Agent Walker: Yes, I just started it.

Agent McGrath: In that case let's begin.

Agent Green: Before we go ma'am I have one last question. Why don't we have any guns?

Agent McGrath: Because the risk of a friendly fire incident would be too high in there. I don't want us to end up shooting each other.

Agent Green: You have a gun.

Agent McGrath: I didn't want us to be completely without one if something does goes wrong. I'm at the front of the group so I'm less likely to hit any of you bastards. Now let's move.

The agents enters SCP-XXXX
Agent McGrath: Cohen, can you see us?
Agent Cohen: Yes, ma'am. Everything's working on my end.
Agent McGrath: Keep us updated.
The team continued walking deeper into the cave

Agent McGrath: Does anyone notice anything?

Agent Stevens: No.

Agent Cohen: Me neither, it looks like an ordinary cave to me.
The team continues walking without speaking for several minutes

Agent Walker: You guys hear that? IWas anyone speaking?

Agent McGrath: No, but I heard something as well. It didn't sound like a voice, it sounded more like someone moving a little ahead of us.

Agent Walker: Keep moving everyone.

The team reaches the area where the cave splits into three chambers.

Agent McGrath: I'm looking for the leftmost… this is the one. Follow me very carefully, there are some steep drop offs in this part of the cave.

An unidentified noise can be heard and the team continues making their way down the leftmost tunnel.

Agent McGrath: Something is down there.

Agent Cohen: I'm not seeing anything with the sonar yet, try moving in the direction of where you think that the sound is coming from.

The team continues walking

Agent Cohen: There's a drop off to your left, be really careful there.

Agent McGrath: Everyone move more to the right.

The team proceeds to move slightly to the right.
Agent McGrath: Anything else we need to know about Cohen?

Agent Cohen: Not yet. When I do you guys will be first to know.

//The team continues carefully making their way down the sloped path.

Agent Green: You know, I had kind of expected something to happen by now.

Agent McGrath: Would you rather be eaten by invincible hell geckos or acid demon chickens?

Agent Green: No, but this place is… weird in its own way. It doesn't seem like there's anything in here except whatever is making that noise and us. I feel like there should be something else.

Agent Walker: Maybe there is something down here but it's hiding from us.
Agent Cohen: I still can't see anything on the… What the Hell?
Agent McGrath: Is something there.
Agent Cohen: No, not anymore. I… I thought I saw something up ahead that looked humanoid but… it was only there for a second. It disappeared somehow.
Agent McGrath: Researcher Grant mentioned he thought he heard something down here earlier, and I also thought I heard something moving around.
Agent Green: Should we head back?
Agent McGrath: Not yet, I want to try to find if whatever's down here left anything behind

Agent Green: By the sound of it, it seems like we are getting close. Be prepared for literally anything.
//The team reaches another intersection in the cave and Agent McGrath carefully leads them through the leftmost passage.

Agent Green: How do we know this isn't a trap?

Agent McGraff: Huh?

Agent Green: I don't know ma'am. Maybe I'm just paranoid, but for some reason it feels like…

Agent McGraff: You may be…

Agent Cohen: SHIT

Agent McGrath: Cohen, what's happening?

Agent Cohen: Their's someone standing just a hundred or so meters in front of you guys…

Agent McGrath: Like, a humanoid entity or…
Agent Cohen: Yeah, like that. It's a little hard to tell over the sonar but… he's gone. He stepped through the wall of the cave.
Agent McGrath: Okay Cohen, I want you to tell us when we reach where he had been standing.

Agent Cohen: Okay. Keep walking forward, move a little left and… Yeah your there.

Agent McGrath:

After this investigation, Researcher Grant decided to enter SCP-XXXX for a third time to attempt to communicate with SCP-XXXX-1. The following interview log was recorded.

+ Interview Log XXXX

Interviewed: SCP-XXXX-1

Interviewer: Researcher Grant

Foreword: Researcher Grant entered SCP-XXXX at 12:00 PM on 8/13/2006. A drone with sonar equipment was sent in as well and Agent Cohen monitored the footage back at site-XXXX.

<Begin Log>

Researcher Grant: I know you're in here now. Please come out.

There is silence for several minutes.
Researcher Grant: Is he here yet.
Agent Grant: No.
Researcher Grant: I'm going to make my way deeper into the cave.
Researcher Grant walks through the cave.
For almost two hours there is no activity, however then the sonar equipment detects SCP-XXXX-1 step out of the cave's left wall a dozen meters in front of Researcher Grant.

Agent McGrath: To your left.

Researcher Grant looks left and SCP-XXXX-1 steps back

SCP-XXXX-1: Can you see me?

Researcher Grant: Uh… yes? You can see me right?

SCP-XXXX-1: No. Who are you?

Researcher Grant: ███ Grant, Senior Researcher with the Foundation.

SCP-XXXX-1: We are not friends of the Foundation

Researcher Grant: Er um…

SCP-XXXX-1: What are you doing up here?

SCP-XXXX-1: Up here?

SCP-XXXX-1: Yes, here.

Researcher Grant: Research. I'm researching this anomaly and I was hoping that you'd know more about it then I do.

SCP-XXXX-1: You'd be wrong then.

Researcher Grant: You don't know?

SCP-XXXX-1: I do, but there are things I'm not allowed to tell you.

**Researcher Grant: What can you tell me then?

SCP-XXXX-1: If I give you information will you go away?

Researcher Grant: I believe that can be arranged.

SCP-XXXX-1: It's a shield.

Researcher Grant: A shield?

SCP-XXXX-1: That's the closest word in your language.

Researcher Grant: What is it meant to shield against?

SCP-XXXX-1: The end of the world.

Researcher Grant: How's this going to stop the apocalypse?

SCP-XXXX-1: I must apologize, ███ Grant, but there are things that I can't tell you. I am, as I know you are, currently tasked with the continuation of my kind's society. Revealing too much information could result in severe consequences for my kind or yours.

Researcher Grant: You can't say anything else?

SCP-XXXX-1: I'm afraid not.

Researcher Grant: In that case do you have any questions?

SCP-XXXX-1: The first time you came in here. When the other individual hurt himself. Why did you run in here?

**Researcher Grant: I… really didn't think of it that much at the time. In retrospect it was a stupid move, I should have sent in the Mole Rats to recover him.

SCP-XXXX-1: It was very dangerous to come in here.

**Researcher Grant: Now let me ask you a question. Would you have saved him if I hadn't.

SCP-XXXX-1 is silent

Researcher Grant: Anything you have left to say.

SCP-XXXX-1: No

An opening in the cave forms and SCP-XXXX-1 leaves by stepping through the cavern's wall.

Researcher Grant: Goodbye then.

<End Log>

Closing Statement: After this event Researcher Grant exited SCP-XXXX without incident.

Investigation of SCP-XXXX is being continued. More information is forthcoming.

A House

Item#: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX has been bought by the Foundation and closed to the public. Civilians who enter SCP-XXXX are to be detained and amnestized.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a house in BLACKBOX Massachusetts. SCP-XXXX was formerly the center of operations for The Red Choir, a now defunct Sarkic Cult that had operated throughout Massachusetts and surrounding states. In June 2011, the SCP-XXXX was raided by a joint GOC and Foundation operation led by a leader of the Choir who had defected. Despite heavy casualties, the operation was successful and all Sarkic forces in SCP-XXXX were neutralized.

Discovery: Because of the Foundation and GOC's cooperation during the operation the Foundation was able to read the GOC's documents on SCP-XXXX

While the Red Choir had been known by the GOC for almost a decade earlier,

Eldtrich Cult

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: Mount [Name] in Peru and the region around it are to be blocked off with barbed wire and guarded by SCP personnel disguised as members of Peru's military. No civilians are allowed entry into the blocked off region for any reason. No SCP-XXXX-1 instances may be allowed to leave the area. If SCP-XXXXX-1 instances gather at SCP-XXXX-A they are to be dispersed by any means necessary (prioritizing nonlethal methods if possible).

Description: SCP-XXXX-A refers to a step pyramid in BLACKBOX Peru. SCP-XXXX is an extremely massive²⁵ quadrupedal organism residing in a hollow chamber under SCP-XXXX-A. SCP-XXXX appears to be sleeping in a fetal position but seismographic scans of the chamber gave revealed it to display life signs such as breathing and between 17 and 25 heart beats. SCP-XXXX is covered in long hair and possess no head instead having thirty tentacles at the end of its long neck. SCP-XXXX also posseses a mouth on each joint of its four limbs. [[Footnote]]This is similar to descriptions of the 'earth monster' a mythological being in ancient Mexica religion. [[/Footnote]]

SCP-XXXX-1 instances refer to members of a cult that worships SCP-XXXX and seek to return it to an active state.
The cult believes that SCP-XXXX originally ruled the Amazon Basin before human civilization entered the region. They further believe that for millennia humans in the region had worshiped SCP-XXXX as a god but a new religion arose in the Pre-Inca Andean civilization. This religion is said to have been hostile to SCP-XXXX snd used thaumaturgy to render it in its inert state. For this reason SCP-XXXX-1 have historically preformed ritualistic killings patterned (poorly) off of ancient Mayan religion beliefs on top of SCP-XXXX-A in the belief that doing so will eventually allow SCP-XXXX to escape and establish a new empire with the cult being granted high positions in it. All SCP-XXXX-1 instances are sapient llamas capable of communication in the Peruvian language and manipulation of simple tools.

Discovery: SCP-XXXX's existence is first documented in newspapers from 1913 which mention SCP-XXXX-A as being a 'haunted' location. It is currently unknown when or how the Peruvian government first became aware of SCP-XXXX existence, but it is known that by the year 1988 Peru's military were actively performing containment and quarantine of the region around the pyramid. In 1999, the Foundation was contacted and requested to assist the military in containment of the anomalies. All files pertaining to SCP-XXXX were transferred to the Foundation and the military force stationed around SCP-XXXX-A was reassigned and replaced with a Foundation Security Force.

Addendum:

VIDEO LOG - XXXX

---

DATE: 3/13/2000

NOTE: A drone with a mounted camera was used to observe the SCP-XXXX instances as they performed one of their religious rituals. The video file itself can be found in Attached-File-XXXX

---

[BEGIN LOG]

3:00 PM: A group of SCP-XXXX-1 instances wearing hooded black cloaks and holding torches in their mouths begin walking up the steps of SCP-XXXX-A. At the top of the pyramid another SCP-XXXX-1 instance wearing a feather headress and a blood red cloak (here referred to as SCP-XXXX-2²⁶

3:15: The camera was focused SCP-XXXX-2 but no activity was noted. The camera was moved back to the rest of the SCP-XXXX-1 instances and they split into two groups and walked left and right clearing a path up the staircase to the top of SCP-XXXX-A.

3:26: After several minutes of no activity a group of five SCP-XXXX-1 instances emerged from the jungle leading two blindfolded crias²⁷ All seven begin slowly climbing up the steps leading to the top of SCP-XXXX-A. As they approach the SCP-XXXX-2 begins to speak.

---

[END LOG]

Title 1

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: A zone is to be placed extending five (5) kilometers surrounding SCP-XXXX. This zone is to be surrounded with chain link fence and patrolled by the MTF team 'Mechanical Eye'. Any nonFoundation personnel found inside the zone for any reason are to be detained, administered amnestics and released in the outskirts of BBBBB, New Mexico which is located thirty one (31) kilometers away from SCP-XXXX.
Description: SCP-XXXX is a mountain range located in the US state of New Mexico. SCP-XXXX is effected by several seismic phenomenon that cannot be explained by nonanomalous seismic activity. At irregular intervals (between seven (7) and eighteen (18) years between each occurrence) the mountain will begin shaking heavily, often causing severe rock slides and damage to the surrounding several kilometers. The cause of this activity is unknown.

Title 2

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: A zone is to be placed extending five (5) kilometers surrounding SCP-XXXX. This zone is to be surrounded with chain link fence and patrolled by the MTF team 'Mechanical Eye'. Any nonFoundation personnel found inside the zone for any reason are to be detained, administered amnestics and released in the outskirts of BBBBB, New Mexico which is located thirty one (31) kilometers away from SCP-XXXX.

Withing a cave system in the mountain has been built a research facility. Foundation scientists with level four clearance who have been granted permission by O5-BB may visit this facility. They will obtain instructions when they arrive and go through the facilities security. All scientists working at the facility must take amnestics before being authorized to leave the perimeter around the zone.
Description: SCP-XXXX is a mountain range located in the US state of New Mexico. SCP-XXXX is effected by several seismic phenomenon that cannot be explained by nonanomalous seismic activity. At irregular intervals (between seven (7) and eighteen (18) years between each occurrence) the mountain will begin shaking heavily, often causing severe rock slides and damage to the surrounding several kilometers. The cause of this activity is unknown. SCP-XXXX contains a cave system which is the site of a Foundation research facility. The caves are never damaged by the mountain's seismic activity.

The caves contain an infohazard that effects people who know about the caves or what they contain. This information is not harmful, but knowing further details about the caves can have a detrimental effect on the human mind. For this reason all personnel ho enter the caves are required to take amnestics after leaving.

Title 3

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: A zone is to be placed extending five (5) kilometers surrounding SCP-XXXX. This zone is to be surrounded with chain link fence and patrolled by the MTF team 'Mechanical Eye'. Any nonFoundation personnel found inside the zone for any reason are to be detained, administered amnestics and released in the outskirts of BBBBB, New Mexico which is located thirty one (31) kilometers away from SCP-XXXX.

Withing a cave system in the mountain has been built a research facility. Foundation scientists with level four clearance who have been granted permission by O5-BB may visit this facility. They will obtain instructions when they arrive and go through the facilities security. All scientists working at the facility must take amnestics before being authorized to leave the perimeter around the zone.
Description: SCP-XXXX is a mountain range located in the US state of New Mexico. SCP-XXXX is effected by several seismic phenomenon that cannot be explained by nonanomalous seismic activity. At irregular intervals (between seven (7) and eighteen (18) years between each occurrence) the mountain will begin shaking heavily, often causing severe rock slides and damage to the surrounding several kilometers. The cause of this activity is unknown. SCP-XXXX contains a cave system which is the site of a Foundation research facility. The caves are never damaged by the mountain's seismic activity.

Title 4

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Thaumial

Special Containment Procedures:

Description:

Addendum:

Alternate SCP (Unrelated to first five tabs).

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be stored in a standard anomalous item locker in site [Blackbox]. SCP-XXXX may be experimented on with written permission of Dr. Blackbox.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a 1961 IBM Selectric Typewriter. It's physical properties are what are to be expected for a typewriter of its model, except that it shows no signs of age. When a person presses any of the keys, they will instantaneously vanish. An individual who disappears in this manner will reappear in a nearby location after a variable amount of time. While a person is under the effect of SCP-XXXX's anomalous property, they exist in a room in an unknown location. The room has no visiblewalls, a carpeted floor and a roof with many bright overhead lights located ten (10) feat above the floor. The room contains a vast amount of desks at each of which sits a monkey working at a typewriter. The monkeys continuously hit the keys on the typewriter in an apparently random manner and place the pages they have written on their desks when they are fully printed on. In addition to the monkeys at the typewriters, monkeys with carts walk around the room collecting the pages from the monkeys and taking them to an unknown location. The room also contains a monkey designated SCP_XXXX_A who is capable of speech (1). SCP_XXXX can communicate with anyone who enters the room regardless of their spoken language. If a person who has entered the room presses any button on any typewriter they will immediately be returned to normal reality standing next to SCP_XXXX.

Interview Log Blah Blah
Researcher Blank: Are you SCP_XXXX_A?
Argax: I was last time I checked, but around here I go by Argax.
Researcher Blank: Are you in charge here?
Argax: I may be. Depends on whose asking.
Researcher Blank: In that case may I ask a few questions?

Below is a transcript of the three documents that SCP_XXXX_1 gave to Researcher Blank

+ Recovered Document ShoopDaWhoop

There was a flash of light and Researcher Blankity Blank appeared in the Infinite Monkey Chamber. The first thing he noticed was the smell, infinite monkey odor was a very horrible smell. Researcher Blankity Blank stepped forward and glanced around the infinitely massive chamber that he had found himself in while trying to avoid breathing in too much of the air. He looked to his left and saw Argax standing with his clipboard in hand observing the monkeys at work. As Researcher Blankity Blank stepped forward though, Argax heard him and turned around to face the Foundation scientist.

"Are you SCP_XXXX_A?" Researcher Blankity Blank asked the monkey.

+ Recovered Document ShoopDaWhoop

I looked away from Reddit and force myself to continue writing my SCP [Put in footnote linking to pataphysics or something]. I hesitate for a few moments as I try to think of what to write. As usual, the words come to my mind slowly, but eventually I managed to put some words down on the glowing screen of my laptop: "There was a flash of light and Researcher Blankity Blank appeared in the Infinite Monkey Chamber."

+ Recovered Document ShoopDaWhoop

I

Title 5

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: The perimeter around SCP-XXXX is to be patrolled at all times by MTF Really Cool Guys. Any non-Foundation personnel who enter the perimeter are to be detained and, if necessary, administered amnestics before being taken to the town of BLACKBOX ten (10) kilometers away.

Five Scranton Reality Anchors are to be placed around the entrance to SCP-XXXX and are to remain powered at all times. Dr. Guy and two (2) Foundation agents have been embedded inside SCP-XXXX (see attached document blahblahblah).

Description: SCP-XXXX is a cave in the BLACKBOX mountains in continental North America. Inside the cave is a single cavern that winds downwards to a vast underground chamber. The Chamber is approximately semispherical and 50 km (far too large to fit in the cave structure based on how deep the cave goes. The middle of the cavern consists of a forest (all species found in the forest are native to North America except for Redacted) and it is surrounded by three villages each about 40 km apart. These villages are inhabited by nonanomalous humans with a total population estimated to be between 1700 and 2500 (see below). Directly North of the village is a white hill with a castle (The castle matches no known architecture styles which is curious as all other structures are roughly equivalent to those found in 17th century America) on top of it. Every day at approximately 11:00 PM an entity referred to as SCP-XXXX-B comes out of the castle. SCP-XXXX-B is a large (0.5 kilometer diameter) sphere shaped entity which closely resembles the sun except that it is covered in eyes that resemble those of a goat. It emits light and heat capable of increasing the caves temperature to around 90 degrees (need to convert this to Celsius). The temperature of the cave never exceeds this maximum despite being fully enclosed except fro the one exit. When it emerges SCP-XXXX-B moves around the cavern illuminating it before returning to the castle at approximately 7:00 AM.

Discovery SCP-XXXX was discovered in 1967 when one of the villagers (here refereed to as SCP-XXXX-A exited the cave. Because of his strange behavior, SCP-XXXX-A was picked up by local authorities and taken to a local police station. After leaning of the incident in a newspaper, Foundation agents were dispatched and SCP-XXXX-B was taken into the Foundation's custody. SCP-XXXX was able to communicate in English, but only using an archaic dialect and from him information was learned about the villages located in SCP-XXXX. Information about the villages is given below. Information was gained from SCP-XXXX-A's testimony and later Foundation Agent's investigation of SCP-XXXX

+ Village Information

The three villages located around the central forest in SCP-XXXX are all consistent with life in America during the eighteenth century except for a few key differences.

The first major difference is that instead of following Christianity, villagers follow an unnamed religion that worships SCP_XXXX_B. The religion is led by a group of 70-100 blind priests who live in the castle. The priests have eight catechisms which they teach to the people living in the villages.

1. The True Sun is the only Lord. There is no sun but IT. All other suns are False Suns who serve the Scarlet King.

2. Nothing is outside the cave. The cave is the only world. Outside the cave is the Abyss ruled by the Scarlet King.

3. It's impossible to leave the cave, if one left the cave they would be devoured by the Leviathans (link to SCP-682?).

4. The True Sun protects us from the Scarlet King and in exchange all we must give is complete obedience.

5. No one may harm another man living in the cave without a really good reason.

6. All men except the priesthood are equal. The priesthood are very slightly more equal then everyone else and men are more equal then woman by a small amount.

7. Going against any catechism will lead to punishment from the True Sun.

8. Punishment from the True Sun will likely involve death, tranformation or both.

Second if an individual in the village breaks a social taboo in the village during the SCP-XXXX-B time when it is in the sky, SCP-XXXX-_B will harm them with a reality bending effect. SCP-XXXX-B does not seem able to effect the village during the times that it is in the castle. If a taboo is broken during these times the priests will capture the individual and chain him to a rock so SCP-XXXX-B can use it's reality bending effect when it activates. The effect varies. Below is a list of some of SCP-XXXX-B's effect.

Taboo: A man was caught looking through the windows of people's houses. During the day the priests took him outside.

Result: The man's eyes melted and skin grew over the eye holes.

Taboo:Two woman (both married) were caught having an adultrous relationship.

Result: The two woman were fused together into one amoeba like organism and then violently detonated causing minor damage to several buildings and a spray of bone shards that cut a priest's eye giving him minor lacerations. The injuries were almost instantly healed presumably through the False Sun's reality bending effect.

Taboo: A child threw stones at a cat killing it.

Result: Two of the fingers on the child's right hand turned to stone and then fell off.

Taboo: A man murdered his brother over a land dispute.

Result: The man was set on fire and burned with an intense white flame. It took nearly five hours for him to die and he appeared to have remained conscious for the entire time.

Taboo: A woman insulted one of the priests.

Result: His tongue turned into a millipede and crawled out of his mouth.

The following information is classified for clearance level 3 or above.

Project Sundown:

Project Sundown is an initiative started by Researcher Blank in 1979. From interviews with SCP-XXXX-A it was determined that many of the people living in SCP-XXXX are dissatisfied with the conditions in their society. Project Sundown was started to offer assistance to these individuals, the specifics of Project Sundown are explained below:

1. Three (3) Foundation personnel have been embedded in SCP-XXXX disguised as normal inhabitants of the three villages. Two agents (personnel rotates) and Researcher Blank

2. These personnel seek out individuals who wish to leave SCP-XXXX.

3. After confirming that an individual is a candidate for extraction, the agents then ask them to leave with them.

4. If the potential candidate refuses they are administered amnestics, if they accept the Foundation personnel then smuggle them to the exit to SCP-XXXX. Once on the surface extracted individuals are handed over to a team from MTF Really Cool Guys and driven to site blah. Site blah has been built for extracted individuals to live in under the cover story that it is an Amish community. So far 54 individuals from SCP-XXXX and Blackbox nonanomalous individuals associated with anomalies have been moved to site blah.

A security breach is unlikely to occur as individuals from SCP-XXXX are unanomalous according to all known and most unknown metrics and have no proof of any anomalous activities. However, to ensure a continuation of normalcy all individuals in site blah have been ordered to refrain from ever telling any nonFoundation personnel about the anomaly that they have encountered. Failure to comply with this rule will result in termination administration of a class Omega amnestic so as to ensure they are incapable of performing any more security breaches. See attached document blooy and incident report uhdur.

Incident Report uhdur:

(This is a transcript of a video file uhdur. The video itself can be found at blankity blank.)

[Researcher Blah is sitting at his desk nervously tapping one finger on it. The door is opened and two Foundation Agents walk in escorting Mr. Person.

Mr. Person: I think that I may be in trouble.

Researcher Blah: Yes, I do think that is the case Mr. Person.

Mr. Person: I am sorry.

(Researcher Blah walks over to Mr. Person. Mr. Person flinches but Researcher Blah just places a hand on his shoulder.)

Researcher Blah: At this point we all are son. You're fine now. Everything is fine.

(Researcher Blah takes a small grey pill out of his pocket and hands it over to Mr Person.)

Researcher Blah: Take this please, you'll need it.

[Mr. Person takes the pill.]

Mr. Person: What is it for.

Researcher Blah: …

Mr Person: Sir I… I think I need to sit down.

[Researcher Blah pulls a chair back and Mr. Person sits down on it. Mr. Person looks at his hand which is starting to shake uncontrollably. Mr. Person suddenly falls forward and hits his head on the table. He starts making a gurgling noise as he swallows his tongue. The two Foundation agents grab him and take him out of the room. Researcher Blah walks over to his window looks outside and then follows the agents several minutes later.]

Attached Document Blooy

I have written this document to explain my reasoning in my decision to have Mr. ? administered a class omega amnestic. First of all, let me make it clear that this was not something I wished to do. It was something I believed was necessary. This is only the second time this rule has been enacted against the citizens of site blah, though the first time we just terminated the poor girl.

I think I need to give a little background here, first of all this project was my idea, including the penalty for breaching our security policy. I first learned of SCP-XXX in the year 1971, about five years after it was first discovered by the Foundation. When I first learned about I noticed a problem, namely a thousand plus individuals living under the thumb of a monster. I brought it
up with the Ethics Comity. They agreed with me but thought that my suggestion was too risky. They argued that bringing people out of SCP-XXXX would cause them to manifest unknown
anomalies or cause SCP-XXXX-B to go on a rampage. I argued that we already brought
someone out of that place and nothing happened and that as the Foundation it was our job to
Protect humanity, including populations we had just discovered. We argued for ten years before
the Ethics Foundation let me extract two individuals as a test. From their everything developed
into Site Blah as it is now. The resolution to allow my experiment passed by one vote. We
cannot allow the Ethics Committee believe that Site blah is a risk for a containment breach. I
cannot allow anyone living in Site Blah to think that they can cause a containment breach. This
whole thing is already within inches of being shut down.

I don't know why I'm even writing this. I'm not sure if anyone cares or if I could change their
minds if it did. As for myself, I really don't know. Maybe I messed up and maybe there's an
obvious solution I missed because I had tunnel vision for the 'hard' decision. Or maybe this has
just turned into a rant. Unfortunately I have not yet been granted access to the time machine
so I have to live with my decisions.

Secure. Contain. Protect.
Addendum:

The Snail Punching Center

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid Keter

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is contained in a modified standard humanoid containment cell with five Scranton Reality Anchors built into the walls. All SCP-XXXX-1 instances are to be terminated immediately While containment of SCP-XXXX is possible, he is not currently contained. MTF Omega-12 'Achilles's Heels' is currently searching for him.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a male human possessing Class 2 Class 3 Reality Bending capabilities. SCP-XXXX believes in a surreal conspiracy theory that snails are a major threat to human existence, because of this coupled with his reality bending, dangerous snail-like organisms will occasionally manifest around him.

The False Sun

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: The perimeter around SCP-XXXX is to be patrolled at all times by MTF Cool Guys. Any non-Foundation personnel who enter the perimeter are to be detained and, if necessary, administered amnestics before being taken to and released in the town of BLACKBOX ten (10) kilometers away.

Five Scranton Reality Anchors are to be placed around the entrance to SCP-XXXX and are to remain powered at all times. Dr. Guy and two (2) Foundation agents have been embedded inside SCP-XXXX (see attached document blahblahblah).

Description: SCP-XXXX is a cave in the BLACKBOX mountains in continental North America. Inside the cave is a single cavern that winds downwards to a vast underground chamber. The chamber is approximately semispherical and 50 km²⁸ and has a floor made of grassy soil. In the middle of the cavern there is a forest [[Footnote]] All species of tree found in the forest are known to be native to North America except for Redacted[[/Footnote]] which is surrounded by three villages each about 40 km apart. These villages are inhabited by nonanomalous humans with a total population estimated to be between 1700 and 2500 (see below). Directly North of the forest is a hill with a castle built on top of it. The castle matches no known architecture styles which is curious as all other structures are roughly equivalent to those found in 17th century America.

Every night at approximately 11:00 PM an entity referred to as SCP-XXXX-B comes out of the castle from a hole om the front of it. SCP-XXXX-B is a large (0.5 kilometer diameter) sphere shaped entity which closely resembles the sun except that it is covered in eyes that resemble those of a goat. It emits light and heat capable of increasing the caves temperature to around 90 degrees (need to convert this to Celsius). The temperature of the cave never exceeds this maximum despite being fully enclosed except for the one exit. When it emerges SCP-XXXX-B moves around the cavern illuminating it before returning to the castle at approximately 7:00 AM.

Discovery SCP-XXXX was discovered in 1967 when one of the villagers (here refereed to as SCP-XXXX-A) exited the cave. Because of his strange behavior and dialect, SCP-XXXX-A was picked up by local authorities in the town of BLACKBOX and taken to a local police station. After leaning of the incident in a newspaper, Foundation agents were dispatched and SCP-XXXX-B was taken into the Foundation's custody.

SCP-XXXX was able to communicate in English, but only using an archaic dialect consistent with 18th century American English. From SCP-XXXX-A information was learned about the villages located in SCP-XXXX. Information about the villages is given below. Information was gained from SCP-XXXX-A's testimony and later Foundation Agent's investigation of SCP-XXXX. The information and SCP-XXXX-A's eyewitness testimony are explained below.

+ Village Information

The three villages located around the central forest in SCP-XXXX are all consistent with those that had existed in America during the eighteenth century except for a few key differences.

The first major difference is that instead of following Christianity, villagers follow an unnamed religion that worships SCP_XXXX_B. The religion is led by a group of 70-100 blind priests who live in the castle. The priests appear to be the leaders of the villages. They settle disputes between people and give orders to the villagers to do the tasks the villages need.

The second difference is that if an individual in the village breaks a social taboo in the village during the time when SCP-XXXX-B is in the sky, SCP-XXXX-B will attack them with a ray of bright white light. This ray will cause extreme burns and is often fatal. If a taboo is broken during SCP-XXXX-B's inactive period, the priesthood will chain the perpetrator to a rock and SCP-XXXX-B will use it's anomalous light on the perpetrator when it next begins its active cycle.

Researcher Bluh: Hello again Mr. Person.
asked him what was outside the cave. He said that there was nothing outside the cave. I
asked how he knew that and he boxed my ear and told me not to ask questions like that. I wondered
why he was so adamant about not asking any questions but I didn't think about it much after
that. At least not for awhile.
Mr. Person: For a few years after that everything was fine. Then one of my brothers disappeared. I asked my parents what had become of him, but they just told me he had went 'away.' I didn't know what had happened then, but I do know know.
Researcher Bluh: What had happened to him?
He was killed by the Sun. The True Sun. That's what we called the ruler of that place. I was always confused by why they called it that. What other sun was there? The sun was there every day, no matter where you went in that place you could never get away from it. It saw everything that happened under its light and when it saw something it didn't like it would act. Those were the only times it would act.
I remember the priests would chain people naked to the rocks at the edge of the woods. Waiting for the Sun. When it rose, they started to scream. Then there was a smell like pork. It usually only took a few hours, by the end there wasn't much of them left. Just ash.

The following information is classified for clearance level 3 or above.

Project Sundown:

Project Sundown is an initiative started by Researcher Blank in 1979. From interviews with SCP-XXXX-A it was determined that many of the people living in SCP-XXXX are dissatisfied with the conditions in their society. Project Sundown was started to offer assistance to these individuals, the specifics of Project Sundown are explained below:

1. Three (3) Foundation personnel have been embedded in SCP-XXXX disguised as normal inhabitants of the three villages. Two agents (personnel rotates) and Researcher Blank

2. These personnel seek out individuals who wish to leave SCP-XXXX.

3. After confirming that an individual is a candidate for extraction, the agents then ask them to leave with them.

4. If the potential candidate refuses they are administered amnestics, if they accept the Foundation personnel then smuggle them to the exit to SCP-XXXX. Once on the surface extracted individuals are handed over to a team from MTF Really Cool Guys and driven to site blah. Site blah has been built for extracted individuals to live in under the cover story that it is an Amish community. So far 54 individuals from SCP-XXXX and Blackbox nonanomalous individuals associated with anomalies have been moved to site blah.

A security breach is unlikely to occur as individuals from SCP-XXXX are unanomalous according to all known and most unknown metrics and have no proof of any anomalous activities. However, to ensure a continuation of normalcy all individuals in site blah have been ordered to refrain from ever telling any nonFoundation personnel about the anomaly that they have encountered. Failure to comply with this rule will result in termination administration of a class Omega amnestic so as to ensure they are incapable of performing any more security breaches. See attached document blooy and incident log uhdur.

Incident Log

(This is a transcript of a video file uhdur. The video itself can be found at blankity blank.)
[Researcher Blah is sitting at his desk nervously tapping one finger on it. The door is opened and two Foundation Agents walk in escorting Mr. Person.
Mr. Person: I think that I may be in trouble.
Researcher Blah: Yes, I do think that is the case Mr. Person.
Mr. Person: I am sorry.
(Researcher Blah walks over to Mr. Person. Mr. Person flinches but Researcher Blah just places a hand on his shoulder.)
Researcher Blah: At this point we all are son. You're fine now. Everything is fine.
(Researcher Blah takes a small grey pill out of his pocket and hands it over to Mr Person.)
Researcher Blah: Take this please, you'll need it.
[Mr. Person takes the pill.]
Mr. Person: What is it for.
Researcher Blah: …
Mr Person: Sir I… I think I need to sit down.
[Researcher Blah pulls a chair back and Mr. Person sits down on it. Mr. Person looks at his hand which is starting to shake uncontrollably. Mr. Person suddenly falls forward and hits his head on the table. He starts making a gurgling noise as he swallows his tongue. The two Foundation agents grab him and take him out of the room. Researcher Blah walks over to his window looks outside and then follows the agents several minutes later.]

Attached Document Blooy

I have written this document to explain my reasoning in my decision to have Mr. ? administered a class omega amnestic. First of all, let me make it clear that this was not something I wished to do. It was something I believed was necessary. This is only the second time this rule has been enacted against the citizens of site blah, though the first time we just terminated the poor girl.
I think I need to give a little background here, first of all this project was my idea, including the penalty for breaching our security policy. I first learned of SCP-XXX in the year 1971, about five years after it was first discovered by the Foundation. When I first learned about I noticed a problem, namely a thousand plus individuals living under the thumb of a monster. I brought it up with the Ethics Comity. They agreed with me but thought that my suggestion was too risky. They argued that bringing people out of SCP-XXXX would cause them to manifest unknown anomalies or cause SCP-XXXX-B to go on a rampage. I argued that we already brought someone out of that place and nothing happened and that as the Foundation it was our job to Protect humanity, including populations we had just discovered. We argued for ten years before the Ethics Foundation let me extract two individuals as a test. From their everything developed into Site Blah as it is now.
I don't know why I'm even writing this. I'm not sure if anyone cares or if I could change their minds if it did. As for myself, I really don't know. Maybe I messed up and maybe there's an obvious solution I missed because I had tunnel vision for the 'hard' decision. Or maybe this has just turned into a rant. Unfortunately I have not yet been granted access to the time machine so I have to live with my decisions.
Secure. Contain. Protect.

Philosophical Zombies

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: The town of [BLACKBOX] Maine and its surrounding regions are to be monitored by MTF Beta-7 'Maz Hatters' for any SCP-XXXX activity. Any instances of SCP-XXXX-A found are to be quarantined and offered physician assisted suicide. Any instances of SCP-XXXX-B that are located are to be terminated. All instances of SCP-XXXX-A and SCP-XXXX-B are to be incinerated after their deaths. Under no circumstances in any individual to interact with a SCP-XXX-A or SCP-XXXX-B instance without undergoing standard biological hazard procedures.

Description: SCP-XXXX is an unidentified strain of highly contagious virus. No cure or vaccine for SCP-XXXX has been invented. Any individual infected with SCP-XXXX is designated as a SCP-XXXX-A instance. SCP-XXXX infection generally causes the following symptoms

+ SCP-XXXX Symptoms

1. In it's first stages the virus causes a fever and a redish-purple rash along the chest and arms.

2. After five days the infected individual will begin to experience a worsening fever and nausea.

3. After seven days the individual will become delirious before finally falling into a coma and expiring over the course of several hours.

4. After the individual has been dead for six days their corpse, unless it is destroyed by fire or irradiated, will resuscitate as a Type Grey entity referred to as a SCP-XXXX-B instance.

SCP-XXXX-B instances are highly intelligent and have personalities consistent with those the persons that had once possessed their bodies with one notable exemption. All SCP-XXXX-B instances are devoted to the continued spread of SCP-XXXX. Often they will attempt to emotionally manipulate the family and friends of their host body in order to attempt to trick them into accepting SCP-XXXX infection. However SCP-XXXX-B instances have been known to attempt to convert humans by force when manipulative tactics have failed.

Discovery: SCP-XXXX was discovered on April, 2001 in ███████ Maine when an SCP-XXXX-B instance reported anomalous activity in a local graveyard to authorities.²⁹. Foundation Agents embedded in the police department investigated and discovered several active SCP-XXXX-B specimens in the █████ graveyard. These instances surrendered and were taken into Foundation custody (see Interview Log XXXX-1). After this though seven D-Class personnel and five field agents became infected and died. The twelve Foundation personnel were buried and Senior Researcher █████ James asked the Maz Hatters to investigate because of their experience countering infectious anomalies. Further information can be found in the following Interview Logs and Incident Reports.

+ Incident Report XXXX-1

Several instances of SCP-XXXX-2 were reported in the vicinity of the town of ███████ Maine. The Maz Hatters were dispatched and arrived in town prepared for a possible armed conflict. The Maz Hatters raided a compound in the outskirts of the village that the SCP-XXXX-2 instances were using as a base. 11 instances were discovered in the compound along with three captive humans locked in the basement all of whom were undergoing symptoms of SCP-XXXX infection. One of the Maz Hatters team members, Agent Michael Bell, realized that one of the SCP-XXXX-2 instances had the host body of his deceased wife who had died in the SCP-XXXX outbreak³⁰

Do not read this article

Item #: SCP-13000000-J

Object Class:Euclid Keter Keterer Keterist Apollyon³¹ Mega Apollyon

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-130000000000000-J is to be stored in a pocket pocket dimension inside a pocket dimension inside a dimension inside a wardrobe which itself is to be stored in a 5.57892 m by 7.83690 ft by 0.0597676 furlong chamber inside of the center of a 10 km-radius sphere of solid telekill located under the mountain Olympus Mons on planet ████. For security reasons planet ████ has been moved to an alternate universe and replaced with a decoy planet. The surface of ████ has been covered in SCSDRAs³² and Olympus Mons is to be patrolled at all times by MTF Omega-666 ' Llamas in Christmas Sweaters'. Any individual who approaches the vicinity of the mountain range for any reason is to be detained, beaten to death with a tire iron, and thrown in a ditch next to a Montana highway. In order to ensure the containment of SCP-130000000000000-J provide a false sense of security, planet ████ has been hollowed out and filled with nuclear warheads.

In the event of an imminent containment breach, FTL communicators are to send a warning to earth at which point Procedure-131313-VADER shall be performed.

Procedure-131313-VADER

1. Fifty (50) nuclear warheads are to be shot at every population center in the world.

2. The concrete sealing SCP-2935 is to be removed and Agent Blackbox is to run to the end of the cave and then come back.

3. While step 2 is being performed the Administrator is to call her husband over the phone and say she loves him.

4. Step 2 will trigger O5-13's Dead Man's switch³³ resulting in the destruction of the universe.

5. 50 instances of SCP-2700 are to be activated inside the pocket pocket dimension containing the pocket dimension containing SCP-130000000000000-J.

6. 50^2 instances of SCP-2700 are to be activated inside the pocket dimension containing SCP-130000000000000-J

I know my decision on this matter will be controversial. After all, destroying the universe seems like it runs contrary to the Foundation's mission. However, in truth the reason for this makes perfect sense. If SCP-130000000000000-J breaches containment it will cause a CK-class 'End of the World' scenario, a HK-class 'Deific Subjugation' scenario, a ZK-class 'Reality Failure' scenario, a GK-class '682 on a pogo stick' scenario and a SKary-class 'Really, really bad things happen' scenario³⁴. When viewed in this light it is obvious that the complete and total destruction of the universe and all life in it is the lesser of two evils.

When I was a young starry-eyed researcher I made a mistake while designing the containment protocol for SCP-130000000000000-J, I specified a 5.57842 m by 7.83790 ft by 0.0597686 furlong chamber instead of a 5.57892 m by 7.83690 ft by 0.0597676 furlong chamber. This mistake resulted in the loss of a quadrillion alternate universe Foundations. The loss of so much life still haunts me to this day, however this event taught me a valuable lesson. We cannot compromise when it comes to our containment procedures. We are the Foundation, we Secure, we Contain we… what's the last one again?

- The Administrator

Listen you pansies. Because of the containment protocols for SCP-130000000000000-J I have been unable to leave my chair or even change my underwear for twenty years. If I can sit in my own feces and urine for two decades you can accept the possibility of your immanent demise in case of a containment breach. Now get back to work.

-O5-13

SCP-130000000000000-J is, without a doubt, the most powerful and dangerous entity we've ever encountered. I'm not even sure how it was ever initially contained in the first place! The threat of this [Redacted] cannot be overstated. Even simply talking about it can result in you being turned into a mutated, tentacle-covered Agrblgrgblgurgablurg-

-Researcher Former Researcher Steve

In order to ensure complete security involving SCP-130000000000000-J, all individuals who read this article are to be subjected to Procedure 120-Monatauk³⁵ and then be torture-rape-murdered to death by MTF Omega-666.

Description: [Data Expunged]

Discovery: [Data Expunged]

Addendum MTF Omega-666 have been alerted to your position and are on their way. In order to ensure the safety of the multiverse please do not resist.

Coren the Barbarian

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be made the official king of site-XXXX, an Amish village in BLACKBOX Oregon. SCP-XXXX must have actual legislative and executive power within the bounds of site-XXXX. The perimeter of site-XXXX is to be secured by MTF Epsilon-6 "Village Idiots". Any unauthorized individuals who enter site-XXXX are to be administered Class A or Class B amnestics (at the current, on duty Task Force leader's discretion).

Description: SCP-XXXX is a masculine humanoid entity of unknown origin. Despite being genetically identical to a human, SCP-XXXX is much stronger and has much faster reflexes then unanomalous humans. Additionally, SCP-XXXX is a pataphysical hazard and possesses a dangerous narrative altering anomaly. See incident reports XXXX and XXXX for more information.

Discovery: SCP-XXXX was first encountered in 2010 at a gas station in BLACKBOX, Maine. Authorities were noted of an apparent armed robbery at the gas station and a police team was sent to arrest the suspect. SCP-XXXX encountered the police officers and injured two of them before being incapacitated by a taser. SCP-XXXX was taken into police custody, but while being transported to prison he somehow escaped from the police vehicle and fled into a wooded area near BLACKBOX. Two police officers were killed during the escape. A manhunt was sent to locate SCP-XXXX. After another successful escape attempt, the Foundation began to become suspicious of the possibility of an anomaly after reports of apparent superhuman capabilities were reported from the anomaly. MTF Omega-31 'Maine-landers' were dispatched to contain SCP-XXXX and encountered the anomaly on the BLACKBOX bridge. See discovery log XXXX-A:

Discovery Log XXXX-A: The following log is transcribed from the body cameras of Agents X, Y, Z and T

---

SCP-XXXX is walking across the bridge. It is wearing no clothes other then a pair of BLACKBOX brand jeans and it is holding a bloody sword in its hand. The 'Maine-landers' field agents quickly move out from cover and secure both sides of the bridge.
//SCP-XXXX turns to run but stops when he sees Agents X and Y at the other end of the bridge. SCP-XXXX readies its blade.

SCP-XXXX:** He sent you didn't he?

Agent X: Who?

SCP-XXXX: The Dark Wizard, the one who trapped me in this world. Yes, I see it. You are his servants.

Agent T: Uh…
//Throws his sword and impales Agent X, killing him. The surviving agents open fire, but SCP-XXXX jumps off the bridge and lands in the BLACKBOX river, 300 feat below.

After this incident SCP-XXXX was assumed to be neutralized. A disinformation campaign to counter the reports of his anomalous properties was started. However, SCP-XXXX was later found to be still active when he was noticed on a CTV video camera assaulting another gas station. The 'Maine-landers' investigated and quickly determined that SCP-XXXX had set up camp in an abandoned barn. A strike team was dispatched and set up an ambush in the barn.

SPC

Project #:

Selachian Pugnātorial Capabilities:

The 13 SK3UCCEX units are outfitted with several components that can greatly enhance the pugilation ability of Center agents.

As of incident 95-7-ABDG-Blue-Kappa-Romeo-Omega-Godpig SPC-XXXX is no longer usable. See amendum below.

• "Siren" murderdoodle and doomnoise generation system to induce death and despair in enemy sharks.

*

Project Components: SPC-XXXX refers to a series of 13 Sk. III Ultra-Cool Chordata Extermination Suits recovered from site-XXXX³⁶. SPC-XXXX was recovered when Center personnel noticed several MD&C[[Footnote]]Marlin, Darter and Carp ltd[[/footnote]] and minions rooting through the GCO's trash apparently looking for artifacts to sell. The Center agents proceeded to beat the shit out of the minions and deposited them in the dumpsters, during this operation they discovered SPC-XXXX. Upon noticing the potential for Selachian Pugilation, the agents recovered the SPC-XXXX instances and returned them to a SPC research facility. The suits were repaired by Dr. BLACKBOX and were then tested by MFT Alpha-17 'Fist of God'.

+ Incident Report XXXX-1

Agent BLACKBOX can be seen wearing one of the SK3UCCEX units, a great white shark is swimming in the distance

Agent BLACKBOX: Okay, I see a shark, I think it's time to test this baby out.

//Agent Blackbox swims in the direction of the shark. The shark notices Blackbox and starts heading in his direction. Blackbox activates his SK3UCCEX unit's Automated Fist launcher and launches a fist at the shark. The fist strikes the shark in the face with enough force to knock it unconscious.

Agent Blackbox: Damn…

+ Incident Report XXXX-1

Sometime after the SK3UCCEX units were upgraded a new phenomenon was noted. One of the lead researchers of the project was reported missing. MFT agents were dispatched to locate him, but they were reported missing as well.

[[tab The End of All Worlds]]

BY ORDER OF THE OVERSEER COUNCIL

The following file is Level 5/3000 classified. Unauthorized access is forbidden.

XXXX

Item #: SCP-XXXX
Object Class: Appolyon
Special Containment Procedures: Foundation AI are to monitor Social Media sites for any incidence of SCP-XXXX. Individuals who experience SCP-XXXX are to be detained and adminsitered Class B amnestics. Individuals who continue to experience SCP-XXXX after being administered amnestics are to be terminated. All instances of SCP-XXXX-A are to be destroyed immediately upon recovery.

MTF Nu-13 "Locusts from the Abyss" are currently researching the possible means of containing or neutralizing SCP-XXXX-1.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a type of dream that is randomly experienced for unknown reasons. SCP-XXXX can be experienced by any human during any time they are sleeping, however SCP-XXXX events are exceedingly rare. There is currently no known way of predicting when or where they will occur. In most cases an individual will only experience an SCP-XXXX event once in their lives, however 1-3% of individuals will experience repeating SCP-XXXX events.

SCP-XXXX events are similar to unanomalous dreams³⁷ in most respects with only one major difference: individuals who experience SCP-XXXX events have a 20-30% chance of being inspired to create a SCP-XXXX-A instance.

SCP-XXXX-A refers to anomalous artwork created by those who have experienced a SCP-XXXX event. All instances of SCP-XXXX contain memetic effects, most notably the ability to trigger more SCP-XXXX events.

Item: SCP-3309

Tissue Test Record: N/A

Termination Test Record. SCP-682's entry within the RAISA was altered so as to no longer fit within modern RAISA standards while still containing enough accurate information as to allow containment of SCP-682 to continue. Following this event, SCP-3309-1 failed to appear at the end of SCP-682's entry, Instead, a page appeared on the RAISA archives containing the designations and links to the files of 14 SCP objects including SCP-682. The cause of this phenomenon is unknown and further research by the pataphysics department is ongoing.

Notes: It's almost certain that continued testing on SCP-682 will have no results and it's also possible that anything on the 'Heritage Collection' is also now immune to SCP-3309's effect. Because of this testing is not to continue- Site Director ███████

Item: SCP-4455

Tissue Test Record: N/A

Termination Test Record. SCP-4455 was taken out of containment under the armed guard of MTF Omega-12 and shown video footage of SCP-682. SCP-4455 was told that SCP-682 was a 'kaiju' that would destroy Tokyo unless it was terminated. MTF Omega-12 than took SCP-4455 to SCP-682's containment chamber via their reality bending abilities. SCP-682's containment chamber was emptied of acid while under heavy guard and SCP-4455 entered it. SCP-682 had become alert after noticong the acid being removed from the containment chamber, and upon noticing SCP-4455 he immediately attacked it, attempting to crush SCP-4455 with its claws.

SCP-4455 then fought and stalemated SCP-682 after which both anomalies were recontained without further incident.

Notes: After this test the staff of Site-██ were administered low grade amnestics to ensure information security invloving MTF Omega-12

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: NA (Because it doesn't exist)

Special Containment Procedures: As SCP-3930-J has no properties other then killing people and creating monsters that kill people, no containment procedures are necessary other then that everyone should leave it alone.

Description: SCP-3930 is a static void that does not exist but can still kill people. While SCP-3930 does not exist and possesses no properties, anyone you attempts to enter it will immediately experience a UHK you-have-been-killed scenario and will thus be dead. It is currently unknown how SCP-3930 is capable of causing these deaths despite not existing. More research is being conducted. In addition to it's ability to kill, SCP-3930-J is also capable of creating monsters that also kill people when observed. It is currently unclear how SCP-3930-J is able to both create and destroy organisms despite not existing. Research into SCP-3930's nonexistant properties was previously being undertaken by Senior Researcher █████████████████████ ████████████████████████████ ███████ but was canceled when Senior Researcher █████████████████████ ████████████████████████████ ███████ was killed by SCP-3930-J

Agent Guy: I'm still confused about how this works, so it doesn't exist but it can still kill you?

Researcher Dude: Yes Agent ████████████████████████████ Guy, I believe that was already well established by SCP-3930-J's Description paragraph.

Researcher Dude: The monsters are created from the minds of people viewing the patterns that the human brain makes to cover over the Hateful Mirror that is SCP-3930.

Agent Guy: But wait a minute, a 'Hateful Mirror' is a thing that exists, are you saying that SCP-3930-J actually does exist now.

Researcher Dude: No, of course not. All of SCP-3930-J's properties are simply caused by the human brain's inability to view complete nothingness.

Researcher Guy: Except that it's not complete nothingness. It has volume and the ability to kill people so clearly it has to be something. And… people can view nothing without having hallucinations like SCP-3930-J causes. Our brains just interpret nothing as blackness or silence or something. Like, this skip makes no sense.

Researcher Guy: Only because you don't understand it. Look, SCP-3930 is complete nothingness it…

Agent Dude: But that's just the thing, humans can perceive nothing, we do it all the time! SCP-3930 should be producing no signal to our brains so we should see SCP-3930-J as just a vantablack³⁸ blob with no smell or sound. And about the Pattern screamers, if they are 'to a neutrino what a neutrino is to us' how the Hell can they effect us at all? It should be impossible for them unless…

Researcher Guy: Okay, so you can believe in evil numbers from another universe but a weird blob of nothingness causes…

Agent Dude: Unless we're not real either?

Researcher Guy: Huh?

Agent Dude: The Pattern Screamers are nothing but can still kill us. The only way that can work is if we're also nothing, if we also don't exist.

Researcher Guy: Huh? What… what gave you that idea? Of course we're real Agent Dude!.

Agent Dude: Sorry, but I don't think we are.

Researcher Guy: Wait what, what do you…

Agent Dude: We aren't even people, we're just names on an interview log. This dialogue is the only part of us that actually exists. There's nothing else here.

Researcher Guy: Wh… what are you talking about. We're at Site-131313 and… and…

Agent Dude: There is no Site-131313. Hell, even the name Site-131313 is just something you made up to male it seem like we actually are someplace instead of here. You didn't even know about it until that line.

Researcher Guy: But but… where… where are we. Stop scaring me Agent Dude, damn it. This… this is crazy.

Agent Dude: We're nowhere Guy. Damn it, don't you get it? We don't exist. Our words are literally just lines of dialogue on a computer screen.

Researcher Guy: That's not true.

Agent Dude: Try to look around.

Researcher Guy: Damn it Dude, I think that… you need to get evaluated or something you are.

Agent Dude: Try to look around Guy. You can't and you know why? Because there's nothing there.

Researcher Guy: Damn it Dude. Fine I… I… oh 343.

Agent Dude: There's nothing there, just a static void. We are less then neutrinos.

Researcher Guy: YOUR RIGHT THERE IS NOTHING THERE.

Researcher Guy is screaming

Agent Dude is screaming

The void is screaming out from the pattern on your screen.

Following this incident Researcher Guy was found dead at his desk. He had died of shock and blood loss after his face demanifested for unknown reasons. On his desk were a series of papers with words in his own handwriting written in his own spinal fluid. He had apparently penned the following message shortly before his death:

Damn. It's true. I… I can't believe it but it is. Agent Dude was right, we aren't real. We don't exist. We're nothing, nothing nothing at all. I'm sitting here staring out my window at the sun sinking down under the horizon, except that there's no desk, no sun and no horizon. My life… my everything is just words in a dialogue box on some shitty horror website. My work, my family, my friends, they don't exist. They weren't even in my mind until I wrote them down here. They were created on the spot and will cease to be when the reader stops reading this page. And… and the only ones who know are the Patterm Screamers and now I do as well. I'm just waiting here for the Screamers to come for me except that 'here' is nowhere and… Oh 343. Oh 343 no THEIR HERE. OH 343 THE PATTERN SCREAMERS ARE HERE. THEY'RE COMING THROUGH THE WINDOW AND. GAH. OH NO. 343 SAVE ME. THEY"RE EATING MY FACE. AGHHHHH. NOOOOOO. THE PATTERN SCREAMERS ARE EATING MY FACE! NOOOOOOO! ARGHHHHH! OH 343, NOT THE FACE, PLEASE NOT THE FACE. AGHHHHH. NOOOOOOO. UHHHHHHH. ARGLBLRGRL. AGHHHHHHHHHHH. NOOOOOOO. UGHHHHHHHHHHH. ARGHHHHHHHH. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO URGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG. GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. NOOOOOOOOO. AGHHHHH. NO STOP EATING MY FACE. NO AGHHHHHHH. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. URGGGGGGGGGGGGGG GAHHH GRRRRRR AGHHHHHH NOOOOOO STOPPPPP AGHHHH ARGHHHH NOOOOO AHHHHHHHH ARGLBLRGLRUL AHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOO AHHHH ARGGGG AHHHHH ARHHHHH GAHHHHHH NOOOOOO AHHHHHHH AGGGHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AGHHHHHHHHH AGHHHHHH 343 NOOOOOOOOOOO AGHHHHHHHHHH ARGHHHHHHH NOT THE FACE NO NOT THE FACE AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Item #: SCP-9999-J

Object Class: Adorable Thaumiel

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-9999-J is to be kept in a glass teraium on O5-12's desk for it's own protection. All Site staff with clearance level 4 or above are invited encouraged to come and pet SCP-9999-J.

Description: SCP-9999-J is a bunny named Mr Cutie Mcflufferbur. SCP-9999 posseses no anomalous properties other than being abnormally fluffy and adorable.

Discovery: SCP-9999 was first noticed by O5-12 when she was taking her daughter pet shopping. Upon noticing SCP-9999's unusual cuteness, O5-12 made efforts to obtain SCP-9999, achieving this for only 15$.

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Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Archon³⁹

Special Containment Procedures: Since SCP-XXXX only effects individuals already involved in the Occult Community and has, historically, been beneficial for the Foundation's interests, containment of SCP-XXXX is not to be pursued. This document is written only to inform personnel of the phenomenon and to be used in case containment of SCP-XXXX ever becomes necessary.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a phenomenon by which certain anomalous entities will spontaneously experience a reality shift usually to the extent of their capabilities and intelligence being dampened (or, rarely, erased completely). SCP-XXXX primarily effects APEs⁴⁰ that have been worshiped by religions⁴¹ however rarely other anomalous entities have been effected as well.

The following document includes a truncated list of entities that have been effected by SCP-XXXX.

Name: Ananteshesha

SCP-XXXX Event: Ananteshesha is an entity originally worshiped in the Hindu religion.

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: Foundation vessels under the jurisdiction of MTF Theta-5 "The Bigger Boat" and allied SPC vessels are to remain alert for instances of SCP-XXXX and destroy any that are encountered near the surface. The Foundation AIC⁴² 'Ahab' is to monitor social media at all times and to report all media that could relate to possible SCP-XXXX activity to MTF Theta-5.

Description: SCP-XXXX refers to a population of marine organisms endemic to the Pacific Ocean. SCP-XXXX organisms have an appearance extremely similar to the carcasses of whales[[footnote]]SCP-XXXX was theorized to be a group of reanimated whales until further study was performed.]] and use this appearance to lure in prey. SCP-XXXX organisms are capable of surviving indefinitely out of water but have limited mobility on land, they will intentionally beach themselves in order to attract scavengers and humans. When a scavenger, such as a seagull, approaches an SCP-XXXX organism it will attempt to consume the scavenger. However, when a human encounters one of them the SCP-XXXX instance will attempt to capture the individual and drag them into the ocean.

Individuals who are in contact with an SCP-XXXX become capable of breathing underwater. If any individual views an SCP-XXXX organism while it is in motion they will develop severe mental (damage)? unless properly amnestized.

[[tabview]]

SCP-4913

SPC-3871-J

Special Containment Procedures: No method of containing SCP-XXXX is currently known. See addendum (level five classified) for possible ways of preserving human independence. By order of the O5 Council this article is declassified for all Foundation personal.

Description: SCP-XXXX is an extrasolar polity controlling several hundred solar system in the Milky Way Galaxy.

Item №: SCP-XXXX

Anomaly Class: Keter Neutralized

Archived Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is not currently contained and does not need to be contained. One Foundation Researcher is to be stationed on SCP-XXXX at all times. SCP-4774's activity is to be monitored by Foundation satellites.

Archived Description: SCP-XXXX is an anomalous star ship of unknown origin. SCP-XXXX has a roughly conical central structure with two large wings of unknown purpose at each side of it. Each wing has a stylized gold 'W' painted on it, the rest of the ship is painted purple and lavender. SCP-XXX has landing gear and two directed-energy weapons of an unknown type on the rear side of it. Entrance to SCP-XXXX is possible through a hatch in the left side of it ahead of the wing. SCP-XXXX is 16 m long and has a 15 m wingspan.

Internally, SCP-XXXX has several rooms including living spaces, storage and multiple rooms of unknown purpose. SCP-XXXX is crewed by an unknown number of entities (SCP-XXXX-A). SCP-XXXX-A instances appear to be identical male humans of Hispanic descent wearing red uniforms. However, SCP-XXXX-A instances do not have any organs or other internal structure and their uniforms are fused to their bodies. SCP-XXXX-A instances all posses a tattoo reading "Mr. Space, from Little Misters ® by Dr. Wondertainment" on the back of their necks.

SCP-XXXX has several unusual and possibly anomalous features that differentiate it from standard vessels.

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Author: 7happy7
Adviser: C-take
License: CC BY-SA 3.0

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Footnotes

1. Nemo refers to an entity, phenomenon, object or location which cannot currently be confirmed to be either anomalous or nonanomalous. As per Classification Committee Guidelines, Nemo class objects are to be treated as anomalous until their nature can be confirmed.

2. A corpse identified as John BLACKBOX was found outside William's home wearing SCP-XXXX-A

3. The names were obtained from the side of the crates the anomalies were contained in

4. After a brief investigation, it was determined that this 'Julie █████████' was in fact a pile of nonanomalous stuffed animals stitched together into the rough outline of a feminine figure and which displayed no motion, sapience or any other anomalous phenomenon. The cause of this and any possible links to SCP-XXXX is unknown.

5. SCP-XXXX-A is the only monkey in SCP-XXXX's room known to possess this ability

6. A slang term for SCP objects.

7. Archon-class anomalies are anomalies that should not be contained due to the damage that would be caused by doing so.

8. Archon-class anomalies are anomalies that could be fully contained but for which the Foundation has decided to forgo full containment.

9. This should have been obvious from the appearance of it alone.

10. Which missed resulting in 500,000 civilian casualties.

11. Following this event, Wilson was reminded that the Foundation'a policies forbid kill stealing. As a disciplinary action he was castrated, subjected to Procedure-110 Montauk and crucified. The 'critters' formerly held at WWS were then neutralized and sold on the exotic meat market.

12. This event was later dramatized in a 2013 film as part of the Wondertainment Cinematic Universe

13. No relation to the Dark of Marshal, Carter and Dark ltd.

14. It is possible to see SCP-XXXX instances with the unaided eye, but only when they are contrasted against a dark background.

15. No relation to the Dark of Marshal, Carter and Dark ltd.

16. After this event Researcher Maxwell authorized more investigation into the anomaly.

17. Police arrested a local resident named Arnold Walker two weeks after this event. Walker was later charged with homicide.

18. Agent Graves lives nearly a hundred miles away from Baltimore, this is the first report of SCP-4313 manifesting outside of the town's suburbs.

19. This text is known as the 'Cannibal Hymn'

20. A reanimated entity. 'Undead' in colloquial terminology.

21. A proposal to create a specialized object class specifically for SCP-XXXX was taken up but ultimately rejected as their was little reason to do so. SCP-XXXX is not an anomaly in the traditional sense and therefore the concept of an object class does not apply to it.

22. Since no electromagnetic radiation can travel through any area inside of SCP-XXXX, standard remote controls could not be used to control the drone. Instead it was connected with a long cable to a computer in the base camp

23. The device was connected back to site-XXXX via a long cable, effectively working like a modified landline phone.

24. Each team member had a harness connected to a cable and each individual cable was tied together into one main cable which connected back to the main camp and also connected to the cable the drone was connected to.Agent McGrath also had a second cable connecting back to site-XXXX which worked like a landline phone allowing her to keep in contact with Agent Cohen

25. Estimated to be 3 km tall at its full height.

26. The headdress does not match any used in actual Andean religious ceremonies

27. Cria is the term for infant llamas.

28. These dimensions make SCP-XXXX far too large to fit in the cave structure

29. This was almost certainly an intentional attempt to entrap Foundation agents, but it is currently unknown how the SCP-XXXX-B instance knew that their were Foundation agents embedded in the local police department.

30. At this time the connection between death from SCP-XXXX infection and resuscitation into a SCP-XXXX-2 instance had not been discovered.

31. The Foundation has decided to continue using the Appolyon classification for SCPs as it is an effective tool to set the tone for an article when done properly. Furthermore, Researcher Blackbox has determined that everyone who dislikes the Appolyon classification has a high probablity of being a 'loser horror writer nerd' and most likly 'smells bad'.

32. Scranton Super Duper Reality Anchors

33. O5-13 has a button on his desk which, when pressed, will trigger a mechanical finger which will in turn trigger another mechanical finger which will press SCP-001-J. The theory is that if O5-13 dies suddenly, such as from a SCP-2935 activation or a cerebral hemorrhage, he will fall over and press the button thus triggering SCP-001's self destruct effect.

34. And that's just what happens if it breaches containment. I can't even tell you how bad it would be if it ever enters its rage state. No, really. Any attempt to describe SCP-130000000000000's rage state would result in the end of the multiverse and [Data Expunged].

35. It's like 110-Monatauk but worse.

36. A dumpster behind a GCO (General Crustacean Organization) facility.

37. Often individuals effected by this anomaly are unaware that their dream was anything other then a normal dream.

38. Following this interview Agent Dude was castrated, subjected to Procedure 110-Montauk and crucified as a disciplinary action for using the term 'Vantablack' as if it referred to a color and not a chemical compound

39. Archon-class anomalies are anomalies that should not be contained due to the damage that would be caused by doing so.

40. Apex-Tier Patapotent Entity

41. Deities of both mundane and occult religions have been effected by SCP-XXXX

42. Artificially Intelligent Conscript