Per 
Item #: SCP-XXXX
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures:
A portion of SCP-XXXX, during preparations for Foundation exploration.
Description: SCP-XXXX is an extensive network of subterranean tunnels situated beneath Kern, Los Angeles, and Ventura counties in Southern California. At the time of documentation, 995,000 kilometres of tunnels have been charted by the Foundation1. The full extent of the space occupied by SCP-XXXX remains unclear; large-scale sonar mapping suggests that SCP-XXXX could extend for at least ten times the currently-documented distance, and up to forty kilometers into the Earth's crust.
Tunnels range from ten inches to fifteen meters in diameter, and appear to have been constructed using non-anomalous methods (extranormal size of the structure notwithstanding). Removal of concrete cladding reveals large equipment placed at thirty meter intervals; this technology is similar in design, albeit not identical, to the ontologically-resistant panels employed by the Foundation within the walls of humanoid containment chambers. It is theorized that this equipment facilitates the presence of SCP-XXXX-1.
SCP-XXXX contains no discernible entrance or egress2, though the tunnel closest to the surface is connected to a utility room that holds active data relay equipment. The purpose of this setup is under investigation.
SCP-XXXX-1 is a concentration of energy with a Mayerson reading3 of 199δ.00004, rendering it just barely sub-noospheric in nature (where the noosphere carries a Mayerson value of 199δ.00105). Individual readings, however, have been observed to spike at delta values as high as δ.99984, suggesting that SCP-XXXX-1 may be a highly volatile entity if not for the presence of the counter-ontological equipment previously described.
Due to a lack of further understanding regarding its nature, the implications of SCP-XXXX-1 entering or otherwise interacting with the noosphere cannot be safely or accurately theorized.
Addendum-1: On 2020/07/05, webcrawler CTRL.C flagged a patent newly filed by "The Boring Company", a Los Angeles-based infrastructure corporation. The patent in question was for a network of high-speed interurban road tunnels, remarkably similar in design to SCP-XXXX.
Foundation operatives attempted to contact company CEO Elon Reeve Musk, but were instead directed to close friend and provisional executive Timothy Palmer due to Mr. Musk's ongoing paternity leave.
Note: Mr. Musk had previously been placed under Foundation observation for several months in late 2019, following threats made against him by members of Gamers Against Weed.
Interviewed: Timothy Palmer
Interviewer: Researcher J. Alvarez
Foreword: Video interview was conducted under pretence of an inquiry by the United States Patent and Trademark Office (USPTO).
<Begin Log>
Researcher Alvarez: Thanks for agreeing to do this, Mr. Palmer.
Timothy Palmer: Mhm, it's cool. Just Tim, or Timothy.
Researcher Alvarez: Right.
Timothy Palmer: Mkay then, how can I help?
Researcher Alvarez: To cut to the chase, patent-wise, what Mr. Musk is trying to file for here is essentially just a road tunnel.
Timothy Palmer: And that's a problem?
Researcher Alvarez: Well, yes. Because there are tens of thousands already in existence.
Timothy Palmer: Did you even look at it properly? It's a, mmm, highly advanced public transport network. In my defence, those are Elon's words, not mine. I'm not the one blazing it on some hack podcast and coming up with this stuff the morning after. Mhm?
Researcher Alvarez: Doesn't sound like you're, uh, too positive about this whole thing, Mr. Palmer. On that note, what even is your role at The Boring Company? I've never seen you named on any of the press releases.
Timothy Palmer: Hey, I just run the show while Elon's out of commission. We go back to his, hmmm, rather brief couple of days at Stanford.
Researcher Alvarez: I see.
Timothy Palmer: He's the kind of guy who needs someone breathing down his neck. Think of me as, I guess, a voice of reason. Mkay?
Researcher Alvarez: A voice of reason? And you're just fine with him gallivanting off on these multi-billion dollar vanity projects?
Timothy Palmer: Elon's all about, mmm, vanity, Mr. Alvarez. When you're dealing with him, the reasonable thing is to try hard as you can to not put a dent in his fucking ego. Believe me, mkay? I've been on the receiving end.
Researcher Alvarez: So, when he calls you up to lay out his latest venture, you… ?
Timothy Palmer: I say, "mmhm, sure buddy, sounds great!" And then he'll shop it to the R&D guys, y'know, the people who actually make this crap vaguely workable.
Researcher Alvarez: But… this is just a tunnel. A lot of tunnels, granted, but-
Timothy Palmer: He wants to build a tunnel, he can build his stupid tunnel. He could slap his name on a turd and people would eat it up, mkay? That's how it works. It makes him money and caters to his XX-fucking-L ego.
Researcher Alvarez: I mean, looking at the blueprints, I can pick out about a hundred lawsuits waiting to happen. And that's without the glaring safety flaws… you could dig a "tunnel" that's just a hole in the dirt and it'd still be less of a liability than this. I'd have to see, let's say, a life-size prototype or something first.
Timothy Palmer: Mmm, I strongly suggest you keep your nose out of this, Mr. Alvarez.
Researcher Alvarez: [laughs nervously] What, are you serious? You're going to pull the "vapid threats" card?
Timothy Palmer: You said it yourself, mhm? It's just a tunnel.
Researcher Alvarez: I don't understand why you're behaving like this, Mr. Palmer. Clearly you have your own set of grievances with Mr. Musk, so-
Timothy Palmer: No, exactly. You're bang on. Only I've had the displeasure of knowing him just a little better than you.
[Timothy Palmer exits the call.]
<End Log>
Closing Statement: Mr. Palmer was marked for Foundation surveillance, whilst Researcher Alvarez requested the Foundation's file on Elon Reeve Musk be reopened for analysis.
Researcher Alvarez sought to contact Foundation Field Operative Avery Wilkinson, a Class IV psionic (precognitive/low-range clairvoyant) who provided covert security at a Seattle technology expo Mr. Musk attended in December 2019.
Direct contact was impossible due to Wilkinson's recent expiry in a raid on La Rue Macabre. Alvarez was instead granted access to their debrief report on the Musk operation.
Wilkinson's report was dismissed as a lapse in their psionic ability, after which they were placed on a regimen of counter-nootropic treatment and thusly demoted to conventional MTF duties.
Addendum-3:
The following exchange was flagged by surveillance software placed on the computer of Timothy Palmer. The call was made on 2019/11/10, four months prior to the Foundation's discovery of SCP-XXXX.
Timothy Palmer: Hey buddy, guess what?
[Unintelligible]
Timothy Palmer: No, no. Hold your horses. I wanted it to be a surprise.
[Metallic churning]
Timothy Palmer: Mkay, I'll give you a clue. Let's see…
[Grinding]
Timothy Palmer: Ugh, fine. I'd have thought you'd, mmm, have been a little more patient. Anyway, you ready?
[Sounds of several machines revving at once]
Timothy Palmer: It's a tunnel boring machine. State-of-the-art. Fresh prototype right out of the gigafactory.
[Unintelligible - Foundation auto-transcription registered the sounds to be most similar to a monster truck rally]
Timothy Palmer: Mhm, yeah. I knew you'd be excited. But there's one condition you gotta meet if you actually want to have it. Do a little something for us, mmm?
[Revving ceases]
Timothy Palmer: Yeah, I can wire the details to you. Spoilers - it's something you're good at. Involves ruining a rich dude's shit.
[Crunching sounds]
Timothy Palmer: Heh, don't eat me now. I'm not that rich. This guy… you'll know his name. I bet you really hate him. What do you say?
[Mechanical noises]
Timothy Palmer: Mhm, great! If you're anywhere near Eureka this afternoon, I'll lower it down for you. Thanks Gert; your assistance shall be further rewarded.
Incident Log 2020/09/23:
| Death Date | Name | Age | Ht/Wgt | Cause of Death/Personal Effects |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 09/23/20 | ALVAREZ, Julian E. | 38 | 6'4/210 | Multiple head trauma from collision with vehicle (Tesla Model S, vehicle fled scene). Deceased was a pedestrian. No signs of life upon arrival at trauma unit. Briefcase was found on his person, containing annotated map of Los Angeles region. See attachment. Belongings requisitioned by Government agency. |
