Unregistered Member

SCP-XXXX - A Sheet of Paper

SCP-5000-1 in initial containment. The majority of visible markings have since faded.

Item #: SCP-5000

Object Class: Euclid¹

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5000 is currently kept in a bulletproof and fireproof container in Room S17-10 at Site-19. SCP-5000 is to be monitored by at least two personnel at all times, and any writing appearing on the object is to be recorded and reported to the shift supervisor. Research is currently focused on automating this task to address personnel shortages on other projects.

Due to the nature of SCP-5000, all personnel should be rigorusly vetted and approved by unanimous personnel vote before assignment. Personnel caught interacting with SCP-5000 outside of approved experiments will be reprimanded immediately.

Description: SCP-5000 is a combination of two distinct entities, SCP-5000-1 and SCP-5000-2.

SCP-5000-1 is a blank sheet of vellum parchment, approximately similar in size to a sheet of standard A4 paper. The parchment is physically unremarkable aside from a small '3' in the top left corner. Materials analysis reveal that the parchment is most likely crafted from sheepskin, and radiocarbon dating has placed the year of manufacture in the span 150-200 CE.²

SCP-5000-2 is a sentient entity that is intrinsically linked to SCP-5000-1. It is currently unknown what physical form, if any, SCP-5000-2 takes.

SCP-5000, at a fundamental level, acts as a 'wish granter'. Users can write 'wishes' or requests on SCP-5000-1, which are then carried out by SCP-5000-2. Most written requests will become reality, but usually in an indirect manner. SCP-5000-2 does not directly carry out the commands written on SCP-5000-1 - it 'seeks out the suitable person, and plants a seed in their mind', then spectates the result.³. SCP-5000-2's behaviour is consistent with testing, which has shown that other subjects in the area will feel a strong compulsion to carry out the requestor's instruction, usually without identifying a discernable reason for their (often sudden) change in behaviour. It should also be noted that SCP-5000-2 does not guarantee that wishes will be completed successfully - real-world unpredictability still applies to all requests. Once a wish has been fulfilled, the original writing will disappear.

Because of this limitation, it can be inferred that reality-altering commands, or commands that would otherwise be impossible, cannot be performed. This includes (but is not limited to) requests such as altering the flow of time, ending the universe or breaching the fundamental laws of physics.⁴ However, it is currently theorised that, given a large task, SCP-5000-2 would influence a subset of the population to mobilise to complete the objective.⁵

SCP-5000-2's primary mode of communication is via SCP-5000-1. However, SCP-5000-2 cannot override SCP-5000-1's anomalous effect - anything that is written will also plant a suggestion in SCP-5000-2's mind, even if it originated from SCP-5000-2 itself. This makes it exceeding difficult for SCP-5000-2 to describe itself effectively, as it cannot prevent this effect. One theory is that SCP-5000-2 is seemingly incapable of classifying written language as reality or fiction, and thus will believe whatever it is told about itself.

SCP-5000-2 has demonstrated a continued willingness to communicate with Foundation personnel, albeit often in a cryptic or indirect manner to avoid unintended consequences. During interviews, SCP-5000-2 prefers to communicate 'by tale', which involves the interviewer writing a detailed description of a fictional area and placing themselves and SCP-5000-2 inside it. SCP-5000-2 can then enter this setting in the interviewer's mind, and any action carried out is recorded automatically on SCP-5000-1.⁶ In these tales, SCP-5000-2 prefers to be referred to as 'Voice'.

Addendum 5000-A - History and Discovery: Because of the obscure appearance and effect of this anomaly, establishing a definitive history is extremely difficult. Research has recently discovered possible references to several artifacts that bear striking similarities to SCP-5000.

Open Addendum 5000-A - Summary of historical research

The earliest known mention of SCP-5000 is found in the writings of Brother Francis Martin, an English monk who wrote extensively on existentialism in the context of Christianity. In one of his letters, Martin mentions a scroll through which God seemingly answered his prayers. When he wrote his prayer on the scroll, an answer - which he interpreted to be from God - appeared on it.⁷

Other texts also make reference to artifacts with similar characteristics:

• Jeann Déan, a French priest, writes of 'a page that lifts the veil of God, that we may talk with his holiness as a friend'⁸
• In 1139, an unnamed cardinal wrote of a 'miracle' during an excommunication - 'The man, from a nearby village, was presented before His Holiness. Yet as the decree was written, I beheld a miracle - the ink melted and ran off, and in its place was a rebuke, commanding that the man be forgiven. What a sign of love and mercy!'⁹
• g

However, the most detailed and compelling account of SCP-5000 is that with which it was discovered. The 1858 tome, entitled On Occultism, appears to be a personal grimoire of its author, 'J.E'. The majority of the writings contained therein are trivial, mostly describing generic neo-pagan rituals. However, the author also includes a significant analysis of SCP-5000. J.E doesn't directly mention how they came into possession of SCP-5000, simply stating that it was 'by luck, by friendship, and by money.' J.E demonstrates basic knowledge of

SCP-5000 was discovered amidst a shipment of artifacts to the British Museum on 19/12/██. The shipment contained several artifacts from around the world, including a small collection of rare books. SCP-5000 was discovered by Agent ██████ inside a tome entitled On Occultism, the contents of which formed the basis of our initial understanding of the object. Upon recovery, SCP-5000 was temporarily held at Site-49, before transport to permanent containment in Site-19.

Addendum 5000-B - Testing Logs: This addendum includes a collection of abridged test logs that best demonstrate the anomalous properties of SCP-5000. Unabridged logs can be found in the relevant area in SCiPNET, or requested from Dr. Liam Thorne.¹⁰

Open Addendum 5000-B - Abridged Test Logs

Test 1

Aim: To investigate whether SCP-5000's anomalous abilities are consistent with those described in On Occultism.
Personnel: Dr Thorne
Request: 'I want a cup of tea'.
5000-2 Response: None
Result: A few minutes after the request, Dr Williamson entered the testing room with a fresh mug of tea for Dr Thorne. When asked on his reasoning, Dr Williamson stated that he 'owed' Dr Thorne, and the thought just suddenly dawned on him.
Analysis: The outcome of this test appears consistent with the behaviour outlined in the book. Further testing will be required in order to confirm this is the case.

Test 2

Aim: To continue the investigation of SCP-5000's anomalous properties.
Personnel: Dr Thorne
Request: 'I want a first-edition copy of The Chernobyl Madonna, delivered to my home address: [REDACTED]'.¹¹ Note: Site-19 does not have a print copy of the aforementioned book.
5000-2 Response: 'Specific'
Result: Dr Thorne received a call the next day from his bank, informing him that fradulent activity had been detected on his account. As a result, a number of items were fradulently ordered from various websites - one of the items being the requested book.
Analysis: This confirms the original hypothesis: That SCP-5000-2 cannot directly complete each request, but can direct people to perform certain acts to achieve the goal. This test also highlights the creativity of SCP-5000-2 in achieving its goals.

<Tests 3-8 omitted due to similar content>

Test 9

Aim: To determine the effect of physical distance on the abilities of SCP-5000-2.
Personnel: Dr Brolly and Dr Jones, appearing via video link from Site-49.
Request: ' I want Dr Jones to raise his hand.' Dr Jones was not aware of this request.
5000-2 Response: 'Yes'
Result: After a minute, Dr Jones raised his hand above his head, citing a strong desire to do so.
Analysis: Interestingly, it appears that geographic distance is not a limiting factor for SCP-5000-2. This could be a possible avenue for further investigation.

Test 10

Aim: To determine if SCP-5000-2 ensures the request is carried out successfully
Personnel: Dr Croft and Dr Thorne. Dr Thorne is stationed in the nearby break room.
Request: 'I want Thorne to make me a cup of tea.'
5000-2 Response: 'Tea is a common theme'
Result: Dr Thorne made a cup of tea and started to walk to Dr Croft. En route, Dr Gault tripped him in the corridor, resulting in the destruction of the mug Dr Thorne was holding.
Analysis: It appears that SCP-5000-2 does not guarantee that the wish will be carried out successfully. Further investigation required.
Addendum: Dr Croft later wrote 'Why did you you let Dr Thorne fall?', to which SCP-5000-2 replied 'Not my problem'. This appears to be consistent with the conclusion to this test.

<Test 11 restricted>

Test 12

Aim:
Personnel:
Request:
5000-2 Response:
Result:

Addendum 5000-C - Dr James Croft Interview:

Open Interview 5000-I-14

Yet, the interior was different - it was not ruined, but instead in pristine condition. The walls were decorated with intricate and colourful glyphs, some showing mighty frescos - one depicted a Pharaoh offering lavish sacrifices, whilst another depicted workers erecting a monument. Great carved columns of sandstone supported the tiered roof, which allowed natural light to fill the hall. At the far end, on a raised platform, was an ornately carved limestone throne - upon which sat The Voice.

"They all have the same reaction." The Voice sighed. "Almost as if it's their first anomaly all over again. You puppets are always so predictable."

"It's quite a nice place". James replied, ignoring the slight. He traced a carved lotus with his hand, admiring the detail in the petals. "Late Old Kingdom?"

The Voice smiled. "A fellow scholar, are you?"

"Amateur, I would argue."

The Voice nodded. "Yet, I sense you aren't here to discuss the intricacies of Ancient Egypt, are you?"

"Of course not", Croft replied, "but such a conversation would be riveting. I am here to ask you some questions though, if you would be willing to answer them."

"As always. But be careful what you ask, I do answer truthfully…most of the time."

James reached into his pocket and fished out a small notebook. Flipping past pages of arcane scribbles and mathematical calculations, he scanned down the list of questions. This will take some bullshitting to pull off…

"So uh, can you describe yourself for me?"

The Voice looked down at him bemusedly. "Why, here I am. Have you not eyes, Doctor? Why not describe me yourself?"

As I thought. "I'd rather you do it for yourself, Fi-Voice."

The Voice shifted in its throne. "You trust me, hm? Why would th-"

"My reasons are my own, Voice. Now, please describe yourself."

The Voice slowly rose. "How should I describe myself? A ruler in an ancient land, an all-powerful god or an unspeakable abomination? Some of the things you seem to think I am." The Voice descended the standstone steps and turned to admire a fresco. It depicted the sun and moon deities, Ra and Khonsu, locked in an eternal battle for the sky. "No, the reality is always much simpler. I'm just an author amidst the illiterate, a musician composing to the deaf - a puppeteer amongst its puppets."

Croft paused writing and flicked back through his notebook. "You seem to be fascinated with puppets. Could you elaborate more?"

The Voice laughed sympathetically. "It's always fun when a puppet questions its master. Your masters weren't too quick to volunteer themselves to travel here, were they? No, they send their puppet. Isn't it fortunate for them that monsters can't climb strings?"

'I am not a puppet, I am not your puppet.' James scribbled in his notebook.

"But are you not my puppet too?" The Voice continued, turning and walking towards Croft. "On a whim I could just say something that would be very bad for you, and that would become reality."

'I am not The Voice's puppet, The Voice has no control over me.' Croft continued writing. "And likewise, Voice. Your threat cuts both ways."

The Voice paused and considered that. "Touché, Doctor."

"What I don't understand," Croft continued, "is that you carry out anything that you are told to do. Does that not make you a puppet to everyone else?"

The Voice tensed at that suggestion. "My role is to oversee, not intervene."

"Well that's just plain lies. You definitely do more than just oversee the artifact!" No no no, why did you-

"Well, now I do."

Goddammit.

Addendum 5000-D - Dr Liam Thorne interview:

Open Interview 5000-I-15

P L A C E H O L D E R

Addendum - Memorandum for all SCP-5000 personnel

From: O5-3 (ten.pics|3reesrevo#ten.pics|3reesrevo)
To: SCP-5000 Personnel (ten.pics|0005tsacdaorb#ten.pics|0005tsacdaorb)
Date Recieved: 16:14:56 8th January 2019
Subject: Memo

Dear Colleagues,

SCP-XXXX - The Spider

W I P

Footnotes

1. Classification currently pending security review, date TBC.

2. With an estimated accuracy of 90%.

3. Paraphrased from Interview 5000-I-14, see Addendum C.

4. For obvious reasons, these hypotheses are blacklisted for future experiments.

5. [DATA EXPUNGED]

6. SCP-5000-2 is fully aware of this effect, but claims to have no knowledge of how or why it occurs. It is currently unknown why SCP-5000-2 believes this.

7. Paraphrased from Letters XVI, by Br Francis Martin (1st Edition, 545, p. 165). Available via the Foundation Digital Archive.

8. Observations of Holiness, by Jeann Déan (1st Edition, c. 1134, pp. 30-56). Available via the Foundation Digital Archive. Although the context of this prose implies SCP-5000, it could be a poetic way of describing a holy text.

9. Translated

10. Dates have been removed for brevity.

11. Actual address redacted for privacy.