Wholesome Family Goddess
rating: 0+x

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is contained at Site-92. Site-92 is to be manned by no fewer than four security staff at any time, who will pose as SCP-XXXX’s personal staff and employees to conceal the true function of Site-92 from the general public. SCP-XXXX is permitted to make short excursions from Site-92 to nearby towns, provided it does not attempt to reveal its anomalous nature, does not stray more than one hundred kilometres from Site-92, does not stay away from Site-92 overnight and only travels when accompanied by at least one member of security staff.

Only personnel who score at least a 85 or above on the Sanders-Deusken Marital Happiness Scale are permitted to visit or hold positions at Site-92. Staff are encouraged to apply for positions at Site-92 alongside their spouse. Under no circumstances are staff who have committed adultery permitted to hold positions at Site-92. Because of this, potential staff are permitted to excuse themselves from consideration for this assignment without explanation.

Staff are not to attempt to contain SCP-XXXX with physical restraints or violence. All prospective Site-92 staff must receive training in non-violent de-escalation techniques and emotional co-regulation, and must be familiar with SCP-XXXX’s Crisis Management Plan. No staff besides SCP-XXXX’s assigned psychiatrists are to mention or be drawn into conversations about SCP-XXXX’s family. In the event of a breach of the Covenant XLIX Agreement, Foundation staff are to prioritise maintaining the agreement over asserting Foundation authority or attempting punitive actions against SCP-XXXX.

In order to encourage SCP-XXXX to remain on the premises during containment breaches, the wine required to fulfil the Foundation’s terms of the Covenant XLIX Agreement is to be kept in a locked on-site wine cellar. In the event of SCP-XXXX accessing this cellar, staff are to immediately contact its assigned psychiatrist.

SCP-XXXX is permitted to access the internet through devices it owns, as long as this access is monitored by the Foundation and complies with the Covenent XLIX Agreement. SCP-XXXX mainly uses this connection to run a family advice blog and associated social media accounts, and to watch videos posted to the Youtube channel run by SCP-XXXX-3.

Site-92’s roof is to be fitted with no fewer than six Type-8 Scranton Reality Anchors (the lightning rod subtype). These are to be disguised as extraneous chimneys, weather vanes and satellite dishes.

Description: SCP-XXXX claims to be the Greek goddess Hera. It is an Omega-class reality-warping entity. It is capable of assuming whatever form it so desires, but typically appears as a silver-haired 50 year old Mediterranean woman standing 1.6 metres in height.

SCP-XXXX is immortal, ageless and indestructible. It is also capable of altering reality within its presence according to its will. SCP-XXXX typically does not use its powers, except when it has to protect its own existence or when it is experiencing periods of high stress.

Due to the difficulties inherent in containing such an entity, the Foundation and SCP-XXXX have entered into the Covenant XLIX Agreement. The agreement was negotiated and drafted in 2003. As long as the Foundation has maintained the terms of the agreement and assisted SCP-XXXX with emotional co-regulation and de-escalation, SCP-XXXX has remained in Foundation custody.

SCP-XXXX is a goddess of family. It has knowledge of the families of anyone within it’s presence, who those families are, the location of each member of that family and the nature of their relationship. On occasion, SCP-XXXX has offered advice to Foundation staff regarding marriage and child rearing. Staff are encouraged to take this advice as SCP-XXXX enjoys being seen as an authority on family relationships.

SCP-XXXX regards its containment as a “vacation” or “sabbatical” away from its own family, particularly its husband (hereafter referred to as SCP-XXXX-1), its other siblings, its two children (referred to as SCP-XXXX-2 and -3) and its daughter-in-law (referred to as SCP-XXXX-4).

SCP-XXXX has a pathological hatred of adulterers. Due to its nature, SCP-XXXX can sense if a person has engaged in adultery upon entering her presence, and it can sense if anyone within that person’s family has engaged in adultery against them. When she personally encounters an adulterer, SCP-XXXX becomes enraged, typically vaporising them or inflicting what it considers to be an “ironic” punishment. Its assigned staff psychiatrists have recently achieved some success in persuading it to undo these, but their success is far from assured.

Per the Covenant XLIX Agreement, the Foundation provides SCP-XXXX with four litres of spiced red wine every week. In times of high stress, SCP-XXXX will typically binge drink the wine it has been provided. Upon running out, SCP-XXXX would formerly breach containment in order to seek more. To encourage it to remain on Site-92 premises, Foundation staff have filled the Site-92 wine cellar with the kind of wine preferred by SCP-XXXX so that it will go there instead of fleeing the Site-92 premises. This cellar is typically kept locked by Site-92 staff and SCP-XXXX does not have free access to it, however it has broken in during times of high stress in order to access more than its allowed four litres.

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