Realizing Battery
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Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Containment: SCP-XXXX are to be housed in a one (1) decimeter (dM) hollow cube of PVC each. Containment unit may have one door, using one entire side of the cube. Containment unit may vary in size slightly, but should be made of an insulator.

Description: SCP-XXXX are 12 duracell 1.5 volt AA batteries (SCP-XXXX-1 through 12. When inserted into any toy however, the toy seems to function as the object it is built to resemble. It also appears to function at any voltage. SCP-XXXX-1 through 6 were found when Dr. Hale was found with a 1/30 model of SCP-3813. 7 through 12 were found through further examination of her office.

Addendum 1: Following the nerf incident, SCP-XXXX is not to be tested with toy weapons.

Addendum 2: SCP-XXXX is not to be tested with money related toys.

Addendum 3: SCP-XXXX is not to be tested with model specimens, for obvious reasons. We’ve already fired Dr. Hale for this, and we won’t hesitate to fire you.

Addendum 4: Actually, just don’t be a dumbass with it.

The Nerf Incident
Olivia wakes, blind eye stinging, and she reaches for her eye drops, stopping when she realizes they aren’t there. Actually, neither is the bedside table. Or the room. Right.

She climbs off the cot, back screaming, to find that her D class uniform had been ripped all over. Looking at the cot, she notes the springs poking through the surface. “I hate this place. God I hate this place.” She looks down. The numbers D-7658 stare back at her. Or they would, had the uniform not been destroyed. “Ahh”

She slogs down to the dining hall, dressed in a fine mixture of D class uniform, yellow and inexplicably blue stained white bedsheets, and a little bit of garbage bag. Breakfast consists of “coffee” and “toast”, with a side of “yogurt”. All of these fell less under the family of food, and more under the family of “food”.

Afterwards, she waits. And waits. And waits. For most of this time she talks to D-7908, another recent recruit. “Do human rights conventions actually apply here?” She asks.

“No, not really.” Replies ‘08.


‘08 is called on later, and is never really the same afterwards.

Months pass before Olivia even learns what the foundation is, or what’s stored there. Minor anomalies are tested on her, but anomalies so minor she doesn’t realize that they are anomalies.

And then the nerf incident.

She wakes at 04:30, and sighs, figuring she won’t sleep any more tonight. She dons her fabulous robe of scraps, and goes through her daily sanity workout. At 06:00, a man claiming to be Dr. Comstock bursts through her door.

“You’re needed for testing. Get ready.”

“It’s polite to knock.”

30 minutes later, Olivia sits in a chair outside a door reading “SCP-XXXX”. Beside her sit two other D classes, 7316 and 6805. She is paranoid of ‘05, as he sits to her blind side, which was the whole reason she’s in this damned place to begin with. She looks over at him every once in a while to make sure he’s keeping his distance. He’s uncomfortably close, and Olivia walks about the room as an excuse to not sit beside him. Comstock pushes through the door. “We’re ready.”

Three chairs sit at the far end of the room. “Sit” Comstock belts. They each take a seat, Olivia sitting as far as reasonably possible from ‘05, making sure to keep him on the side of her good eye.

And the room goes dark.

“What the hell?”
“I dunno this kinda stuff happens every time.”

As the lights come back, they find themselves bound and gagged, though the gags were fairly ameture.


“I ohn huggn gho.”

“Ery ahm ime”

Comstock appears at the other end of the room, holding a nerf sniper rifle. Stifled laughs emanate from the D classes. These end when Comstock shoots ‘16 in the foot. It spurts blood and he lets forth a muted cry.

“Interesting.” Comstock muses as he scrawls in a notebook.

He takes aim, fires, and shoots ‘16 in the head, leaving his body slumped over in his chair.

Olivia has, at this point, has given up all hope of using her brain to get out, and has mentally died, even if her body is still running at 100%.

Comstock takes aim. Fires. ‘05’s head explodes.

Hey. These bonds are kinda weak.

Comstock takes aim. Fires. The shot finds nothing but air. The blue foam dart clangs on the wall. Olivia sprints towards Comstock.

Comstock takes aim. Fires. It grazes Olivia’s shoulder. It hurts like hell, but she powers through.

Comstock takes aim. Fires. It catches her in the knee. She falls. Crawling now, she reaches Comstock. She crawls up his body, too close to shoot.

She grabs the gun. She pushes off, pulling the trigger. Comstock’s shoulder explodes, exposing bone. He falls to the floor, yowling as blood gushes.

Olivia crawls as fast as she can to the dining hall where D-9470 takes her to medical.

That night, Olivia sleeps like the dead.