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I, Vaporware

Item #: SCP-3309

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3309 is to be kept in a low-security containment chamber at Site-17. The containment chamber is to be constructed of a transparent material for purpose of easy surveillance. Any individuals reporting cognitohazardous symptoms after contact with SCP-3309 are to be amnesticized appropriately according to their time exposed.

Description: SCP-3309 is the collective designation for, at the time of writing, thirty-seven unfunctional pieces of technology (deemed SCP-3309-A-1 through SCP-3309-A-37). The original purpose of the technologies vary from instance to instance, yet all of the purposes for these instances are for the completion of everyday tasks that are deemed far from difficult.¹

According to recovered documentation, all instances of SCP-3309-A were intended to be released to the public with the goal to become commonplace in everyday life. The documentation claims to be the property of Finnegan Solutions, yet no company nor organization of that name has been found. The documentation is dated to the year 1999. Any further specifications of date have not been found.

Upon physical contact with an instance of SCP-3309-A, the individual who has conducted the contact will begin to experience feelings of sympathy towards the objects accompanied by random and sudden changes in emotion to anything regarding the instances. These feelings will grow significantly unstable as more time passes.

Individuals affected by SCP-3309 will find themselves impossible to announce the instances as anything but "They(, vaporware)."² The majority of phrases spoken regarding SCP-3309 are of only sympathy and protectiveness.

All effects of SCP-3309 cease following the affected individual entering a sleep state or they are given appropriate amnestics.

Addendum: On the date of 2/14/2017, a breach in the intercommunication system throughout Site-17 was experienced. All individuals at the site received the following messages:

Why can't I just join in?

I just want to be helpful.

Am I not good enough?

We are one, all to be thrown away one day.

Footnotes

1. IE: activating/deactivating light sources, on-foot transportation, eating, etc.

2. Vaporware is a term used for technology which was planned and possibly constructed that never reached completion/distribution.